"You have to go home now. I don't know what mushrooms you're on, but clearly it's some hardcore shit, so I'm not taking no for an answer," your friend scolded after she proved to you that every person you thought was dead was actually alive and well.
"Yeah, you're right," you managed with a half smile. "I – I can take myself back home. You should be having fun."
"No way in hell! With all the shit you're seeing you'll be lucky if you get a DUI," she told you with a shake of her head. "I'll ask Tyler to take you back, you just stay right here, don't go anywhere," she said in a motherly tone before she ran off.
You nodded your head and waited. The room started to feel like it was spinning and the flashing lights and people blurred together. You were becoming light-headed and feeling overly exhausted from lack of sleep. You clasped your hands over your face; you just wanted to get out of here. You could feel people looking at you funny and hear their nasty laughter. Suddenly it seemed like you were in the spotlight just for people to mock, and it made you want to leave even more. You still couldn't believe what had happened, and how it wasn't even real. You couldn't get those grotesque images out of your head. Every time you closed your eyes you saw their cold, lifeless bodies.
It had felt like a century by the time Tyler had came to your aid and you could just imagine everything your bestie was saying about you to him, you foretold an intervention coming your way very soon.
He led you back out the door and into his car, an awkward silence hanging in the air between you two. There was a look of worry etched on his face as he drove you back to your place, similar to Hanna's, but it was even more vexing because you knew that he heard only her side of the story and he didn't know how to ask about yours. Maybe silence wasn't so bad though, you were not in the mood to explain something that you knew no one could truly understand.
You rested your head against the window and shut your eyes, only to open them again when you saw the victims of the party. You were shaking, and the blood that clung to your dress was a cruel reminder of everything that took place before. There was still that queasy feeling swirling around in your stomach, and it hadn't left since you met the one from your nightmares. The more you tried to focus on anything other than the clown, it only made you think of him more. This whole night just felt like a nightmare, a horrible prank come to life.
"We should talk about what happened," Tyler started. The car was pulled over into your driveway and you only just realized when you heard the sound of his voice. "About what you saw back there."
"There's nothing to talk about," you retorted, avoiding eye contact with him and staring at the window.
"I'm really worried about you. Hanna said you were having a fucking panic attack in her garage. I can tell you haven't been sleeping and you don't seem like yourself. There's something clearly wrong-"
"I'm fine! I'm just a little tired, that's all, really. We don't have to do this," you gestured at the space around him, a frown stuck on your face. "I'm just not in a party mood. I still have to study anyway."
"I feel like there's something you're not telling us. You really freaked out Hanna, she's convinced you're on some type of drug that's making you see crazy shit," he told you, and his tone was not reassuring in the slightest. "I don't know what you took today, but you need to get off it-"
"Just forget about it, okay?" you interrupted. "Even if I explained everything, you wouldn't understand," you muttered to yourself.
"You have blood on your dress, don't you?" he blurted out suddenly.
You turned to him with widened eyes and felt a sharp pang in your chest at that. You wanted to answer honestly but then you remembered that they already thought you were crazy.
"No I don't. There's no blood whatsoever, it's as good as new," you answered after a beat.
"Are you sure?" he questioned, his tone disbelieving.
"Yes. Now can you leave me alone about this?" you snapped.
"Okay fine, I thought I could trick you into telling me something," he replied, seemingly ready to back down. You went to open the door to his car and before you could slam it shut, he added, "Do you want me to stay with you? If you need company, I'm totally cool with ditching the party."
You leaned down to the window to tell him bluntly, "No, just go. I don't need a babysitter. Have fun at the party."
And with that, he left. You half hoped that he would stay anyway, despite what you said, you didn't truly want to be alone. You would have liked the company, but you couldn't ask for help or let anyone know how scared you were. It would only put more emphasis on the situation, and you believed as long as you stayed in denial it would make everything feel less real. But even if you don't believe in something, it doesn't make that thing any less real, does it?
You walked up to the porch and knocked on the door. It was your little sister, Lily, dressed as a fairy princess. She was wearing a sparkling dress and holding a wand with a star on top of it.
"Hiya big sis!" she greeted with a wide smile on her face. "Sis, you won't believe how much candy I got today!" she said, practically bouncing with joy.
You muttered a 'hey' before entering the house in a rush and she shut the door. She stopped you in your tracks when she suddenly asked, "What happened to your dress? There's blood on it!"
What? How could she see that? Nobody else could.
Your back was facing her and you suddenly turned to her.
"What? Y-You can see that?" you questioned.
"Did a monster get you?" she asked with a frown, pointing at your dress.
"No, no I'm fine. Don't worry about it," you answered quickly with a nervous gulp.
"Good! I don't know what I would do if any monsters got you," she said with a carefree laugh.
"The monsters aren't going to get me, Lily, because I'm the one that has to protect you from them," you told her with a weak smile.
"I know, I'm so glad I got you big sis!" she replied cheerfully. She ran over to hug you but then she moved back when she looked at your dress again. "It reeks," she said with her nose scrunched in disgust.
"Alright, I know, I'm gonna go change now," you told her with a frown and turned around to make your way to the bathroom so you could take a shower.
"Mom is working late again and she told me to tell you that you gotta cook dinner tonight," she reminded you from a distance.
"You can have candy for dinner tonight," you said as you were walking off.
"Yay!" your sister exclaimed, her eyes beaming with joy.
A string of dread ran up your spine. There was no way she knew about the clown. But how did she see the blood? No, there was no way. It just didn't make sense. You didn't know what to believe anymore.
Once you reached the bathroom, you tore your dress off and practically ran to the shower. You took a brief one, just to rid yourself of the stench of blood and let the steamy warm water calm your bones. Once you were finished, you got dressed in a pair of comfortable pajamas.
It was time to call it a day and spend the rest of the day watching cheesy Halloween movies until you fell asleep, like you did every year so why should this one be any different?
You snuggled up on your bed and flicked through the channels until you found something you decided was worth watching. Though, you were not distracted nor did you laugh at any of the corny jokes the movie provided. You couldn't stop thinking about the clown in the woods. The massacre at the party. Your little sister seeing the blood but everyone else being blind to it. But your eyes were so heavy and your head ached, you could barely think anymore. Your body needed sleep.
Then you heard it.
There was a thunderous bang at the door. Then another. And another.
The disturbance made you jump out of bed and rush to the front door. Your heart was quick to pick up in an unforgiving speed, it echoed in your ears, and your body trembled violently despite yourself. An icy feeling of dread washed over you and presented itself in every footstep.
You cautiously looked through the peephole, only to find three little boys all dressed up in gaudy costumes at the door with their candy buckets. You shook your head in annoyance before heaving a sigh of relief. You got all worked up for nothing. You opened the door quickly and the children greeted in unison, "Trick or treat!"
They were all dressed as superheroes; Batman, Superman, and Thor. There was flowy capes attached to their shiny costumes and they were giggling mischievously, babbling on about how much candy they got this Halloween. You grabbed a handful of sweets from the large bowl at the nightstand next to your door and divided it amongst them with a small smile. You were angry that they made such a commotion, but once you saw how delighted they were you couldn't bring yourself to yell at them.
"Happy Halloween," you said, with as much enthusiasm as you could muster. They all thanked you and left at a moment's notice, laughing as they ran off with their candy.
"Good riddance," you whispered to yourself before slamming the door shut.
You made your way back to the room and plopped on your bed, seeking solace from the warmth of your blanket. Now you could enjoy the rest of this Halloween marathon, or at least try to. You could hardly pay attention to the film before you because you could already feel your eyes drifting shut. It had been a mentally draining day to say the least, and you practically didn't get any shuteye earlier. You remained awake for as long as you could, staying up late hours of the night fighting sleep until it unavoidably took you.
Unfortunately, it wasn't long before the inevitable happened.
It was the small hours of the morning, but you couldn't tell the exact time. All you knew was it was dark, with the only light being a sickly green glow from the numbers on the clock.
The first thing you were aware of was your inability to move.
You were lying on your back looking up at the familiar ceiling in the room. The very air around you was unfamiliar, wrong – and as the seconds pass, that wrongness grows instead of fading. Your breath seemingly comes and goes and your eyes were snapped open, nearly frozen. You blinked slowly, trying to will yourself back to sleep.
Your body was heavy as though there were a ton of bricks stacked upon your chest, crushing you and forcing the air from your lungs. What was even more concerning was when you tried to speak you found you couldn't, it was as if you'd lost all control of your vocal cords. Though, this didn't stop you from trying. You focused all of your attention on uttering a scream, to get someone–anyone to help.
You tried and tried, but no one could hear you. No one could help you. Nothing would move, no matter how hard you willed. Your entire body felt like a dead weight, and it was locked in place as if someone had tied you down, but there were no restrains, nothing pinning you down. Your instincts were livid, shrill in screaming at you to get up and run or at least burrow further into the sheets. You stayed motionless, heart pounding too hard.
You couldn't move.
You couldn't breathe.
You couldn't speak.
A chill passed through you. You felt panic set in, as your eyes darted from the ceiling to around your bedroom, and you were certain that there was somebody else in the room. You could feel their presence lurking in the shrouded darkness. Who else was in your room? This couldn't be happening...
Something – Something with a name you dreaded to remember – hovers waiting on the edges of your mind, hovers intangibly just out of sight in the gloom, one shadow among many, looming over your body with the inevitability of sin. The darkness here could swallow you and leave nothing left behind, those two glowing pinpoints of yellow the last you'll ever see.
Your eyes widened in horror as you heard a raspy, croaky voice calling for you.
"Child," the voice called, "you cannot hide from me forever."
You wanted nothing more than to cover your ears to block out the voice, but you couldn't. "Go away," you repeated over and over in your head. This wasn't your usual nightmare, this felt like something far more sinister. Your mind became overwhelmed with feelings of horror and dread.
"Didn't I tell you? There's nothing you can do to get rid of me."
You were at a loss for words. No way was this happening. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be happening.
"Scared?" the voice asked cruelly.
Your eyes shifted from the shadows clawing their way out of the walls to across the room. It was the clown. He was sitting on a chair that wasn't far away from the foot of your bed, a vile toothy grin spreading across his face. He was unearthly, pale, and tall. He glowed in the faint light of the clock. Everything was so fuzzy, out of focus, but you still knew it was him. You had broken into a cold sweat and fear settled in the pit of your stomach, gripping at your throat.
"Well, well, what do we have here?" his voice was high and mocking, and somewhere beneath the fear you felt a rush of anger.
The clown smirked, standing up from the chair and sitting down at the foot of the bed, now. You could feel the bed shift underneath his weight. He said nothing, and his smirk faded.
"Didn't your parents ever teach you to respond when spoken to?" he scoffed. "Honestly, humans today are so rude," he told you, a deep rumble of a laugh slipping through his lips. "Say, why don't you tell me how the party went?" he taunted. "It looked like you had a lot of fun."
You couldn't answer. He knew that.
Then you saw him above you, a fuzzed shadow in the shape of the clown. Then he suddenly became more in focus. It was him. You could feel a pair of clawed hands wrapped around your neck, pressing down and squeezing, your breath being strangled out of you. Pressure on your chest increased. It was getting harder to breathe. He was staring you down, grinning at your misery.
"You thought you could escape me, couldn't you?" he chuckled darkly. "You can't. I'll always be here. You can't get rid of me. I'm your worst nightmare come to life. A never-ending nightmare you can't wake up from."
You could feel tears forming in your eyes. Let me go. You screamed in your head. Pennywise mocked you, repeating out loud the thoughts in your head. He could hear everything. He was in your head. There was no escaping him. You still cried aloud in your head, hoping and praying there was some way out of this. That someone would come and wake you from this living nightmare.
"You can't hide from me. You can never hide from me! I can smell your fear, it's beautiful– beautiful fear. I want every ounce of it. Every drop, until it's all gone. I'll devour you whole until there isn't anything left of you. You're mine, all mine, and there's nothing you can do about it."
You screamed again, and this time you managed – or thought you managed – the slightest, tiniest rasp of breath. The last of your oxygen was slipping away. You pitched forward with your entire body, willing yourself to move with every ounce of your strength. Every muscle had gone tense and tight, painfully so, and maybe you were even quivering but it wasn't enough.
He continued to mock you endlessly of every cry for help in your head that ended up lost on your tongue. You couldn't do anything. Every attempt was fruitless.
"But it's not your time yet – No, it's not, I'm going to save you for later. Yes, you'll taste just perfect when I do. So perfect. So sweet. Until then – It's not over until I say it is," he rasped, his vile laughter ringing in your ears.
Then it was over, you felt the weight and the pressure that had been binding you be lifted all at once. You were free; alive. It was over, whatever the hell you just experienced was over.
You woke up in a panic.
It wasn't what like most people imagined though, with flailing and shouting and a body covered in sweat. No, what you displayed was utter silence, stillness so prominent that not even your lungs remembered how to work, your eyes wide and frozen in terror. The clown was gone. You blinked your eyes once, then twice, then again, just to be sure you were awake.
You slowly sat up when you felt your breath come back to you and allowed the blanket to slide off your chest. You scanned the room. You noted it was morning once you saw the gleam of the sun coming through your window. You could see your room clearly almost as soon as your eyes opened, everything seemed to be in order. You heaved a sigh, thankful to finally be able to move again and that the clown was out of sight.
You turned towards the glowing digital alarm clock residing on your bedside table. It read 8am. You were still so tired, it felt like you hadn't slept a wink. You took a deep breath, attempting to calm the panic your body was still holding onto. You got out of bed to check yourself over in the mirror.
There was dark red clawed imprinted marks covering your neck, dotted with dry blood, and the very sight of it made a scream bubble in your throat. It almost sounded like a boiling kettle, and you kept your mouth shut, breathing through it. It stung and ached so bad, your whole body was flinching violently with the agony of it. You couldn't help but start crying again, eyes filling with tears as you stared back at the reflection before you.
The words from your nightmare lingered in your head, replaying over and over again.
You can't hide from me.
You walked out of your room and entered the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water. You chugged it down quickly, and from the window you spotted your little sister watering the plants in the front yard like she did every morning before she went to school. She waved at you and you waved back absently. You set your glass down in the sink and the moment you turned away from the window and left the kitchen, Lily was gone.