The rest of the morning meal progressed casually. Even though she tried to participate in the conversations, Elerrina had completely lost track of them. The only thought that floated in her mind was the soothing lullaby of the forest, and how none of her siblings seemed to have known about it. There were so many things she wanted to know, so many things that she simply could not understand, and nobody seemed to be willing to explain anything to her. It was frustrating.
She could feel Elladan's eyes fixed on her, and knew that he could feel her anxiety and detachment from the conversation through their bond. Now more than ever she wanted to be alone with him, wanted him to hold her in his strong arms, to make her feel like nothing could ever happen to her as long as he was near.
Elerrina let her eyes fall down to her plate, absently staring at the half-eaten strawberry tart that remained on it. Next to her, she could hear Tadion's musical voice speaking to Legolas, but she did not pick on the topic they discussed.
Everything seemed so far away, as if she was merely an observer in this elegant dinning room. For a split moment, she wished she had never heard the trees singing, even if it had probably been the most enchanting melody her ears had ever heard, dazzling her into a different time and space as their melancholic voices whispered the lyrics to her, seeming to penetrate into her very spirit. For a split moment, she wished it had not been she the one to hear something the others could not.
She closed her eyes for a second, the soft breeze that entered through the wall-length open windows gently caressing her skin, like a tender hand searching to give some comfort. Outside, the trees continued to sway dully, the soft sound of their dancing leaves floating in the air as an empty song. And that is what it was. It was empty. There were no voices this time; there was no sing of the enchanting tune that seemed to hypnotize her, only their soft whispering into the wind.
She could feel her chest tightening with frustration, making her want to snap out at someone, to yell. But what for? It was not as if she could tell anyone about Vilya, the powerful blue stoned ring, calling to her in the blowing wind. And now she did not even know exactly what of what she could hear and see could her siblings also hear and see.
"Excuse me" She finally said, her voice coming out as a faint whisper as she suddenly rose from the table.
The room felt silent instantly, all conversation dying as five pairs of eyes turned in her direction. Elerrina kept her own eyes on the floor, not wanting to make eye contact with anybody as she wordlessly headed towards the doors, not sparing a look behind. Out of the corner of her eyes she saw Elladan quickly rise from seat, not saying a single word as he strode after her. Tadion also stood, seeming to hesitate on what to do.
"Tadion, no" She heard Legolas' soft warning, followed by the muted sound of the Prince of Mirkwood sitting back down on his seat, but she did not turn or stop as she finally reached the pair of doors, stepping out of the now silent dinning room.
The long corridor was empty, and she did not why, but she felt glad it was. There was no elf who would stare at her, no maid who would greet her politely, making her have to force a smile in return. She kept walking down the hall, her feet moving fast as her mind remained lost in thoughts of her own.
"Rina?" She could hear Elladan following her, his footsteps rushing to catch up with her, feeling his worry and desperation to be near her through their bond.
She suddenly stopped, standing in the middle of the long deserted hallway as she waited for Elladan to reach her side. Not even a second later, she felt a gentle hand circling around her upper arm and she turned to face him, frustration and desperation making her chest constrict.
"Rina?" He breathed out, worry tainting the usually musical sound of his voice, silver eyes quickly travelling up and down her body as if assessing that she was all right. His deep silver eyes then fixed on hers, so gentle and at the same time anxious, drowning her as they silently pleaded to know what was wrong.
She did not say anything, unable to find her voice, her throat seeming to tighten, frustration taking the best of her. Instead, she threw her arms around his middle, pressing her face to his chest tightly, letting herself be lost in his sweet scent and the constant rhythm of his heartbeat.
He instantly wrapped both of his arms around her in return, pulling her tightly against him, as if he could feel her despair. She felt his lips pressing a kiss on the top of her head, and then his cheek coming to rest there, but she did not move, taking comfort in his sole presence.
Slowly, she started to feel more calmed, feeling his spirit reaching her through their bond like a soothing presence, letting her in completely, like two halves of the same essence. His arms continued to hold onto her, refusing to let go.
"Let us go outside." He said softly to her, his hands reaching down to grab hers, giving them a gentle squeeze. He did not wait for an answer on her part as he wrapped an arm around her back and started leading her in silence.
He led her to the large terrace where they had gone to see the snow as it fell the night before, slowly stepping into the snow-covered grass and into the gardens. The fresh air of the forest felt better than she had expected, seeming to clear her mind as they slowly walked in between the trees. The snow crunched lightly beneath her feet, barely leaving any trace of their footsteps, its pure white color patterned with the waltzing shadows of the trees, casting reflections in different shades of greens and greys.
After a short while, she saw a small clearing appear in the forest, a snowed path leading directly into it. A circle of thin pointed arches delineated the clearing, their columns so frail and delicate that they nearly seemed to float. A stone flooring had replaced the grass inside the arched space, resembling an open terrace in the middle of the enchanted gardens of the palace. No roof covered the circling structure, the arches only demarcating a transparent barrier between the open terrace and the shimmering waters of the small pond that surrounded it.
Thousands of flowers crept over the frail columns of the arches, their petals a bright shade of gold she had never seen in a flower before, and she felt the need to touch them if only to prove to herself that they were not indeed made of gold. The many flowers extended beyond the structure, floating over the resting waters with a dream-like delicacy she could not describe.
Elladan led her to one of the benches placed inside the arched circle, lowering himself to sit down next to her. For a moment, she remained quiet, simply enjoying the comforting fresh air, her frustration and desperation slowly being carried away by the soft breeze.
The darkness of the garden felt incredibly soothing, few rays of sunlight were able to filter through the heavy canopy of the green trees. That was something she noticed was different from the gardens in Imladris. Here, the forest seemed so heavy and alive, almost covering every piece of sky in a fascinating composition, so contrasting to the large and open waterfalls and streams in the Valley of Imladris.
"What happened?" Elladan's voice brought her back from her wondering thoughts, and she turned to meet a pair of gorgeous liquid silver eyes staring at her.
"I do not know" She admitted in a soft voice, her head coming down to rest tiredly over his shoulder. Elladan instinctively wrapped one arm around her, slender fingers absently toying with the long strands of golden hair at her back.
"Lossenel did not know what you were talking about. I know you heard something she cannot." His voice was soft as he spoke and she let out a sigh in return.
"I do not know what I heard" Her voice betrayed more of her irritation than she had wanted. She felt his hand gently rubbing a circle on her back, but he did not say anything else.
"Why do I hear things none of them do?" She voiced her question not really expecting an answer. Everything was so confusing, so overwhelming and nobody seemed to want to tell her anything. "Why do I see things? Why do I see it? Why do I hear it?"
Elladan let out a pained sigh, then pressed a soft kiss on her head, his hand continuing to rub circles on her back. She closed her eyes, the frustration and irritation merging with her tiredness and lack of sleep, making every single emotion feel more overwhelming.
"I do not know" He said at last, his voice trying to sound soothing, and at the same time she could hear in it a thread of despair at not having an answer for her.
"Nobody ever does" She whispered in return, snuggling closer to him. He did not say anything else and a void silence floated in between them for a moment.
"The King can also hear the trees" She broke the silence after a long pause. Her voice was barely a whisper, sounding frailer than she expected. Again, Elladan remained quiet, simply listening to her, and she understood that there was really not much for him to say at the moment.
"He told me this morning. I was down at some terrace I cannot recall how exactly I got there, and I stopped to hear the forest singing for I had never heard anything like it. Then he appeared, and asked me if I thought their melody was beautiful. He said it as if it was an everyday thing. He knew I could hear it."
She suddenly felt angry with the Elvenking; although she knew her anger was only fruit of her frustration and exhaustion. Why did he not tell her that other elves could not hear the trees singing? Oh, it must have been very amusing for him to take advantage that she had no clue.
"Did he explain?" Elladan tightened his hold on her as he spoke, and she knew he could feel all of the emotions that wracked her body at the moment but could not to do anything about it.
"No." She let out a shuddering breath, trying to control herself but it was resulting impossible. She knew she would break down in any second, and she really did not want to. "He has not explained anything to me. We talked a little, yes, but mostly about nothing. I can tell he wants to talk to me, but then he is so distant with me, and I do not know what to say. What do you tell the King of Mirkwood, Dan? What?"
She took another stabilizing breath and felt Elladan rub yet another circle on her back.
"I asked him why did I have to be raised away when I first met him yesterday, but he evaded my question. I did not insist. And this morning I asked about my mother. I asked for her name, and conversation died there. He did answer me though. Maybe I should not have asked that. It was bold and not very sensitive from my part I guess."
"It is alright to ask, Rina" He said soothingly, his voice low. "Although I understand why he would not want to talk about that in particular."
"I know." She breathed out. "I do too. It is just…."
She trailed off, letting out another trembling breath as she struggled to keep her emotions at bay.
"I do not know." She said finally, closing her eyes at the tears that where starting to form in them. She took another deep breath, but they were becoming less and less helpful.
All she wanted was to know the truth, and at the same time she did not know if she really wanted to hear it. In that moment, she simply wanted to understand everything, to not feel as if she was a secret to keep quiet. It was all so frustrating, so irritating and despairing.
"Dan?" Her voice sounded shaky this time, braking slightly at the end against her will. "I want to go back to Imladris. I do not want to be here."
Why was she even saying this? She felt him tighten his hold on her, but he did not say anything in return. She knew he could not do anything about it. She knew she could not return to Imladris yet. It was as if she was speaking without thinking, but that was exactly what she was doing. She felt helpless, desperate. She wanted to flee from this place, although she did not really know why. She wanted to feel at home again, wanted to know her surroundings.
"Please, let us go back." She pleaded, her voice nearly speaking against her mind. The sound of it surprised her; it was so broken, barely even audible.
"Rina…" Was all he said, his voice so pained it hurt her. She knew she was hurting him, for he could not do anything, but she could not control herself.
The moment she had been dreading came at last, her emotions finally overwhelming her. She felt a tear roll down her right cheek, her breathing becoming shakier by the second.
"Please, Dan" She pleaded again, wanting nothing than to flee from her misery. "I do not want to be here."
"Rina" He breathed again, and she knew her words were only causing him pain. She could tell that he wanted to answer her plea more than anything, but there was nothing to do about it. He shifted his hold on her, placing her on his lap as he wrapped both of his arms around her now. She took another deep breath, trying to ease the tight knot at her throat as she buried her head against his collarbone.
"It is only your first day here. You have yet so much to see. Give it time to decide if you really dislike it or not." He said gently, trying to provide some comfort, his hand stroking her hair softly. She knew he was right. She knew he was being reasonable and she was not, but at that moment she did not feel like being reasonable.
"I do not know any of them." She did not have to specify for Elladan to know that she meant her siblings. "I do not know anybody. They all know each other…It is just so strange. I do not know how to be Almarëa, and they are all expecting me to be their sister and I do not know how to. I want to go back…please" Her voice broke again, tears now flowing from both of her eyes.
"I know, Rina." He said very softly. "You will get to know everyone in time. They all want to know you. I know it is not easy. You did not know anybody in Imladris when you first arrived and that did not scare you. You did not even know me and you were already yelling at me without shame. Why are you scared about getting to know them? It is very unlike you."
"I do not know" She buried her face deeper in the crook of his neck, letting his dark hair shield her from everything else.
What was she doing? She had seen her entire village in ashes after an orc attack. She herself had survived three orc attacks by now. She had encountered the Nazgul, had felt Vilya taking position of her. And yet, here she was, crying like a child about something that seemed so small. This had finally been the drop that spilled the cup.
"I am whining" her voice was muffled by his tunic, but she knew he could still understand her. She took a deep breath again, trying to compose herself. "I am sorry, Dan. I am whining…I am behaving like a child. I do not know what has come over me"
She had never done this to him. She had never whined or complained about things that bothered her to him. She lifted her head from his shoulder, but he gently pushed it back down, his hand resting on the back of her head as his other rubbed her back soothingly. She felt more tears escape her eyes and she locked both of her arms around his neck.
"It is alright, Rina. You do not always have to be strong." She felt the knot in her throat tighten and more tears escaped her eyes as he spoke. "You are not being a child. You are tired. I know you have not slept."
He fell silent as she took yet another breath, all of her attempts to calm down completely forgotten by now. He simply held her tight, one hand rubbing circles on her back, and she felt safe, she felt better. She would apologize to her siblings for leaving breakfast later. Right now all she wanted was to be held in Elladan's comforting embrace.
"I love you." She whispered to him, and she meant every single one of her words.
"I love you too." He pressed his lips to her head as he spoke, pulling her closer to him.
A long moment passed in which they simple stayed in silence while he held her. A gentle breeze would blow occasionally, caressing her skin softly and tangling her long golden hair with his dark strands. Slowly, she felt her body become heavier, exhaustion finally consuming her as her mind started to drift away.
"Rina?" She heard Elladan's soft whisper in her ear, his voice so gentle, as if he feared to startle her. She blinked several times, trying to push back sleep as she lifted her head from his shoulder to look directly into his liquid silver eyes. "Allow me to take you back to your chambers. You are falling asleep"
She chuckled lightly at his words, one of his hands carefully placing one lock of golden hair behind her pointed ear. His silver eyes were locked on hers, letting her fall freely into their depths, so open and welcoming, sparkling with a gleam that was reserved only for her. She could still see a deep glint of worry in them as he looked at her, so pained and hurt, and she knew he felt useless. She knew he could easily carry her all the way back if he wanted to, but also knew that he could tell she did not want to be carried back.
She let her hands travel to the sides of his face, then leaned in and pressed her lips to his in a long gentle kiss. He kissed her back, deepening the kiss as his arms locked around her waist. At that moment, nothing else was important; everything seemed to fall into its right place once again. They broke apart sooner than she had wanted and she climbed off his lap, taking in his entire appearance as he too rose to his feet.
He was simply so handsome, standing taller than her, his long dark hair falling over his shoulders and back like a curtain of fine silk. His gorgeous silver eyes remained fixed on hers, sparkling like the silver moonlight on the black night sky. He took her hand in his and started leading her back towards the palace.
The way back seemed shorter than she remembered, and in only a couple of minutes her eyes once again caught sight of the large beautiful terrace from which they had come. She could see some elves standing on the many balconies above, others walking through the long open hallways framed by delicate pointed arches.
Another soft breeze blew past her and this time she caught the very familiar sound of a faint whispering in it. Her heart skipped a beat, her body going cold as she recognized the unmistakable call of Vilya in her ears. It was so beautiful and at the same time so terrifying, making cold shivers run down her spine as the image of the powerful blue stoned ring, glowing dimly upon the Elf-Lord's hand, flashed through her mind.
She tried to ignore it, concentrating on continuing her march next to Elladan, but her attempt was in vain. A split second later, the wind blew again, Vilya's whispers sounding louder this time. She stopped suddenly, the sound of the unintelligible words feeling so near, so loud inside her head, almost as if the ring was in here, in Mirkwood. It did not even give her time to think before it rang again, this time stronger now, screaming inside her head, pulling her to it, threatening to detach her form reality.
Suddenly, she knew exactly what was coming, and she could not control it, she could not stop it. She experienced the very familiar feeling of something pushing against her mind as Vilya's screeches nearly seemed to deafen her. She did not even have time to react, her head suddenly feelings as if it was about to split in half.
Everything happened so fast; she barely had a warning before it happened. Elerrina stretched her hand in the air, attempting to grab onto Elladan for support but she never knew if she managed to do so or not. In that second, everything turned black, her head drumming painfully as a powerful force wracked inside of it, trying to get past her barriers. But her barriers where not strong. She did not know how to control it, she did not know how to push it away.
A grave voice yelled loudly inside her head, only adding more pain to the existing one, screaming words in a language she could not understand. It seemed to pull her from her body with a force she could barely fight, dragging her in the direction of the voice. She tried to pull away, but could not. Everything was so dark. Pain. The loud voice wracking her skull in half. More Pain.
Suddenly, a flash of bright crossed her vision, like a blinding explosion that overpowered everything else. It pierced her head with a force she could not match, making everything else disappear, the loud voice vanishing in the brightness. It penetrated her mind, crushing her head with a pressure she thought would make her skull break. And then, as quickly and suddenly as it had come, it was gone.
The pressure eased, her body returning to her senses. Everything seemed to spin, and she could not tell what was up and what was down. Pain again. Every single part of her body hurt, her head seeming to be on fire. She opened her eyes with an effort, her ears catching the distant sound of voices, but she could not tell what they were saying. The images were blurred, and as she concentrated to focus, she caught of sight a familiar face leaning close to her. Piercing ice blue eyes stared into hers, wide and alarmed, so powerful and penetrating, fear tainting the sky colored irises, a gentle hand pressed firmly on her left cheek…
Here is chapter 4! I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it! Please let me know what you think of it!
Again, thank you to all those of you who reviewed my latest chapter: Paperlanterns86, alexiana75, xX-MissyMoo-Xx, jibril, CannonRebel, dandapanda, booklover1598, AmazingWriter123, Coco99, gossipghurl, and CeffylGwyn. Really I can't thank enough for your comments. They really mean a lot to me, and I hope this chapter makes your day a little brighter!
Love,
Elena