Batbrothers
Humor
(Jason is drunk)
This is based on something that really happed. We had this school dance and went to a friend after that. One of my friends was so drunk, he... well, you'll see what happened.
"Why did you force us to go to this stupid dance?" hissed Damian Wayne at his oldest brother, as they desperately tried to keep track of their drunk siblings. Yes, drunk. Jason and Stephanie were completely wasted.
Okay, I bet you wonder how the hell this happened. Let me explain. Cass had heard from this dance at Damian's and Tim's school and practically forced Steph, Jason, Dick, Tim and Damian to come with her. So far so good. They danced a bit and actually had some fun. And then things went downhill.
Stephanie and Jason decided to make a bet. Who'd able to drink more beer without getting drunk wins. And to no one's surprise, no one won. Oh, and let's not forget Tim. Already drunk, Jason thought that Tim was way too stiff and not high-spirited enough, so, with the help of Stephanie, he mixed vodka into Tim's glass of water. And it was a big glass.
And that is the reason they were on their way to McDonald's now, because Tim annoyed them non-stop about wanting a cheeseburger.
They were dealing with a drunk Jason and Stephanie and a semi-drunk Tim now. Damian wanted to kill someone.
"Hey T'm," slurred Jason, as he slung an arm around his staggering brother. "Lemme tell y'a a secrettttt." He giggled uncontrollably. "I am the FLAAAAASH!" Dick face-palmed and pried Jason away from Tim, who stumbled into Damian. Damian just rolled his eyes. "Tt."
Cass couldn't stop snickering. "Jason," said Dick gently, "you're not the Flash, you're drunk." Jason looked at him with big green eyes and cocked his head to the side. "No." He stated, crossing his arms. "And I'll prove it to you. Hey Steph!" The blond girl looked up from... well, whatever she was doing. "I'll prove that I'm the Flash!" Stephanie gave him thumbs up and ran over. At least she could still walk without falling. "See that trashcan?" asked Jason, pointing to his right. Dick groaned but nodded.
Maybe if Jason 'proved' that he was the Flash, they could finally get Tim his cheeseburger and go home. "I'm gonna vibrate through it," announced the rogue bat. Damian, who was trying to get away from Tim, who seemed determined to give Damian a hug, smirked, slapping Tim's hand away. "Go ahead Jason, but remember: full speed."
Dick shot him a glare and tried to grab Jason's arm, but the younger boy was already running head first at the trashcan, shaking his body like he was trying to copy how Barry looked when he vibrated his molecules. "This is so not gonna end well," muttered Dick.
And he was right. Jason crashed into the bin and even though Dick should be worried, he couldn't help but burst out laughing. And it looked like the other batkids had the same problem, rolling on the floor, laughing loudly at Jason's dumbstruck face.
After a few minutes of gasping for air, Dick finally was able to stand up again, still snickering and walked over to Jason. "C'mon Flash, let's get you all a cheeseburger.
And yes, my friend did exactly that, thinking he was Flash and bam! Honestly, we will never let him live that down? ﾟﾘﾂ?.