Thank you all so much for reading so far, I am blown away with the amount of hits my story is receiving on Ao3 and FF.
To my sweet, lovely, awesome reviewers and commenters, you make me smile so big and drive me to write!
I'm still getting the hang of writing smut so bear with me eek!
Here we go!
P.S. check out the end notes for my real life Nathalie Emmanuel story.
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Sansa watches me, not uttering a word for long enough that I start to regret coming here, her rejection will be the worst I'll ever experience. Even if I can only have tonight, which won't be enough (but would anything ever be enough when it comes to Sansa?) I'll take whatever she gives me gladly and have one truly, happy memory.
Finally she reacts, bringing a hand up to touch the burnt side of my face. There's not much feeling left but I register her soft skin against my scarred cheek and swear it's warmer than any other part of me in that moment. Sansa places her other hand on my chest as a smile, a real smile, one reminiscent of who she was before the evils of the world tried to burn out the spark within her, crosses her face.
And then she's pushing up on her toes to capture my mouth once again, this time in a slow, sensual kiss, her tongue licking my lips and tangling with my own as soon I opened for her.
A groan escapes my throat without thought as I grab her supple hips with both hands to pull her tightly against me, tilting my head to deepen our kiss. When Sansa's hands trace their way to my hair, tugging on it and scratching my scalp, I can't stop myself from picking her up as if she's weightless, to place her on the table.
Part of me can't believe what's happening, that my little bird has her long legs wrapped around my waist as I leave hot, wet, open mouthed kisses along her jaw, up to her ear and down her slender neck. The erotic noises Sansa is making, confirming that she is enjoying and wanting the attention I'm giving her, grounds me, reminds me that this truly is my current reality. The dreams and fantasies I've had of moments like this with her, and there have been many over the years, did no fucking justice to the feel of her right now.
What makes the most sense is the moment I feel her pull away, Sansa undoubtedly coming to her senses about letting a damaged old dog put his paws on her. But before I can remove my hands from where they're still holding her hips, I feel her own run along my arms, then to my chest and lastly down my stomach, causing the muscles there to contract and my cock to spurt more liquid into my ruined breeches. I'm unmoving as Sansa explores my upper body, not knowing where this is heading but refusing to make a mistake that will end this glorious torture.
I didn't believe there was a drop of blood left anywhere within me that wasn't my cock but thank fuck there was enough to make my brain work and help Sansa remove my tunic once I felt her fingers grab the hem and slowly drag it up.
As the cloth dropped to the floor and my eyes fell back to the beauty in front of me, now in only my shoes and breeches, I couldn't help but grab my aching length at the sight of her. Sansa was leaning back admiring me, something I can confirm not a single bloody soul has ever done before. People always look up at me, shocked by my height and then disgusted by my scars. But how my little bird is regarding me, looking at every inch of my body that's currently in her view, has my breath matching hers in a slight pant.
When her gaze lands on my chest and abdomen I almost missed her whispered "gods" it's so quiet and then she's licking her plump -plumper now because of our kiss- lips again. I want to reach out to her, settle back between her thighs but I need to know that she wants this. I won't be able to stop myself if we go much farther and after what's happened to her she has to be sure.
Before I can open my mouth to speak however, she's standing up and undoing the intricate, leather and silver layer of her dress. I can't manage words or movement, shocked once again at what is going on, until Sansa is left in only her simple black woolen dress. Her shoes and stockings neatly laid next to the heavy accessories of her outfit, hair now undone and flowing freely around her perfect face.
I step towards her, my hands grasping both of hers as she went to reach behind her to undo the final knot that will expose even more pearly, white flesh and simultaneously remove my remaining wits.
"Sansa, wait." Her eyes whip up to meet mine, the rejection from earlier forcing its way rapidly into her entire being. None of that. Never with me. "No little bird, don't give me that look. Just let me speak." She studies my face warily for a moment before nodding.
I take a deep breath and then ask the questions that may end this, end me. "I have to be fucking certain you want this. You have to be certain. I've dreamt of you too, of this, and you're always eager and willing. Tonight will be no different or it can't be at all. I remain true to my word, I won't hurt you. Ever." My hands had dropped hers so I could cradle her face again and rub my thumbs over her cheekbones as our bodies are flush. I hope my words, my actions and the truth behind my eyes are clear, reassuring.
Sansa's response is almost one with my question she answers so quickly, her fingers squeezing my forearms. "Of course I'm certain Sandor. I've never wanted this before, I didn't think I could physically desire anyone...after. But I also thought I wouldn't ever see you again." She smiles then, causing that strange, warm and constricting feeling to envelope my heart. "I know you won't hurt me and I also know you can make me feel good. I want to experience pleasure for the first time and I want it to be with you. I trust you."
She almost lost me to my release when she said my name. She'll be moaning it soon, fuck!
I could only study her for a short while when she was done as my throat was burning with emotion at her admission.
"Why me?" I wasn't sure Sansa would even hear my broken question, as I could barley utter it above the sound of our breathing.
It's her turn to take my face, making me look at her now. "It's always been you as well. You're brave, gentle and strong." Her eyes get glassy then. "You're no knight, thank the gods." Sansa let's out a short humorless laugh.
"You're the only person I've never been able to stop thinking of, the only one to make me feel truly safe. You helped me to find my voice and to think before I act. I wouldn't be here without you."
Her voice drops to be almost as quiet as my own had been. "And you look at me the way all girls dream and deserve to be looked at. When you think I'm not paying attention at least." Another heart grabbing smile.
I'm in shock at what's just been said to me. I was happy to die if Sansa had just let me in her bed but this runs much deeper than that.
I've never allowed myself to think of a life past being a sworn shield, a killer. Who would ever want me? And in one moment Sansa has broken down any walls locking up my desires and now they're freely flashing in front of my eyes. Laying with Sansa tonight, marrying my little bird if she wants, her with a swollen belly, round with our child many times over and finally having a companion, to no longer be alone.
"Oh little bird." My voice cracks before I can hide it in our kiss. Every time my lips have met hers tonight has been different. This kiss is full of lust but it's also emotional, I can almost physically feel Sansa's words leaving her tongue as it wraps around my own.
I lift her under her thighs and she instinctively wraps them around my waist as I head to the large bed. I place her down and she immediately rises on her knees. The bed gives her a bit more height but Sansa's forehead still just reaches my chin even with the help, and she begins to run her hands all over my exposed skin. She traces over my intermittent fresh bruises from the recent battle, then to my older scars spread out over my chest and torso, before finally gently running her fingers through my chest hair all the way down to the trail that ends in my breeches.
I groan loudly at Sansa's attention and realize I'll have to cum before I'm inside of her or it will be over before it begins. We have all night and I plan on utilizing every minute anyway.
"You're so handsome. I've never seen a body like yours. Your muscles and hair, I don't have words. Not that I've seen much, just one other." Sansa says, eyes dropping in embarrassment. Another emotion not allowed with me. I'm most intrigued by one fact in particular however, and surprisingly it's not to do with my looks.
"What do you mean only one?" I ask as softly as I can.
Sansa tilts her head almost as if it just literally hit her that we have a lot of catching up to do. Not now but over time. I do however need this one answer before continuing.
"Tyrion and I we never. That's how the marriage was able to be annulled."
It doesn't make what happened with Ramsey any easier to think of but I'm impressed and awed with the Imp for keeping his hands to himself. I see the way he looks at Sansa, it's only grown with intensity over the years and I know denying himself her body when she was his must've been near impossible.
"I'm glad to hear that little bird, surprised too. You're mine now though. Do you understand that? There is no going back. Not for me." I tell her as seriously as I can.
"And you're mine." Sansa undoes the one sash holding her dress closed, her eyes never leaving my own as the fabric pools around her knees before she pushes it away.
"Fuck Sansa, you're beautiful." Left in only her silver, silk shift she looks like an angel.
She has the nerve to blush at my words. If those have her turning red wait until I describe being inside of her.
We both reach for the other at the same moment, Sansa gaining purchase first on the laces of my breeches and swiftly undoing them. They fall to the floor and as I use my feet to remove them and my shoes I hear Sansa suck in a sharp breath.
The look on her face is nearing fear which I can't stand but thankfully it's mostly shock. Her eyes are as wide as her mouth as she stares at my cock. It's standing at full attention, long, thick and leaking from the head. It's the only good part of me, in my opinion.
"You're enormous." Sansa breathes. "No wonder Ramsey never wanted me to see him." She claps her hands over her mouth, not seeming to have meant to say that aloud. We both can't help but laugh for a while at her honest, slip of the tongue.
"Aye, I am little bird, but I won't hurt you. I promise it will only feel good or we'll stop." I say as wrap my arms around her, and then bury my face in her neck, inhaling her scent.
And I won't hurt her.
I may not have much experience but I have spent a large amount of time in brothels. It took ages to find the rare whore that would accept my hefty payment only after making me agree to fuck her from behind and not release within her. No one wants to watch The Hound take them let alone bear his bastard. It was too much effort and after only a few mediocre experiences I gave up and familiarized my hand with my cock instead. But I saw a lot of shit during my negotiations. Also, men in battle are the bloody worst and tell stories of conquests in too much detail. Couldn't be more thankful for their tales now though.
Without pulling away Sansa snuck her hand between us and gently grasped my aching length, her fingertips not even meeting around me. She pumps me a few times, slowly and softly, causing me to moan into the crook of her neck. My reaction builds her confidence and she squeezes me harder on the next stroke before she pulls away.
"Lie down." My little bird orders.
She crawls up to my side as soon as I'm on my back and runs her fingers through the hair at my chest once again as her mouth finds mine. Somehow I don't cum all over us when her wet, little mouth starts to kiss all over the scarred side of my face. The sensation is half numb and half explosive all at once. I never thought I'd bear someone to touch my burns but now I crave her caress, her mouth, her attention.
I'm so lost in the feel of her I don't realize her intentions until she's kissing along that trail of hair under my navel.
"Little bird what are you doing?" I pant.
"Can I put my mouth on you? I've always wanted to try since I heard Margaery talking of it with her maid once." There's that bloody blush again.
"Gods yes. You don't have to but fuck I want you to."
"You'll have to tell me what you like." Sansa is between my legs now, arse in the air, eyes looking into my own through her lashes. My cock jerks.
"No one has ever done this to me, looks like we'll learn together." I feel more bare than my current state of undress at being that honest with her.
Sansa looks surprised and then smug for a moment before her hand holds my base and she licks my weeping tip.
"Fuck!" I roar.
Sansa continues lapping at me until I'm writhing and my knuckles are white where they are grasping her sheets. I thought it couldn't get better but that was until she wrapped her open mouth around me and took as much of my cock as she could into her throat.
"Little bird, gods." I couldn't stop myself any longer and my hands wound their way into her hair, having to touch her. "If you don't want my seed in your sweet little mouth you have to stop now." I warn her.
That little minx did the exact opposite. Sansa looked straight into my eyes, ice blue and steel meeting, her free hand tentatively cupping my full sack as she moaned around my length just as it hit the back of her throat.
I pull her auburn locks harder than I meant to but I had to still her movements as I came in spurt after spurt into her waiting mouth, the sensation too much. "Sansa fuck!" I bellowed.
She continues to moan around me, sucking and licking every drop I gave her until I'm half soft. When she sits up to straddle my thighs Sansa has an awed and proud look on her flushed face. "So?" She asks.
I can hardly breathe let alone speak, instead I pull her down into a searing kiss, her lips still tasting of my release. It's the most erotic experience I've had, so far at least, and I feel my cock hardening already.
Sansa's moaning from our kiss alone and slightly gyrating her hips over my almost erect member. I sit up as well, running my hands over every inch of her I can reach. From her neck across her collarbones, down her arms, under the swell of her breasts, over her taut stomach and squeezing her curvaceous hips before gliding my fingertips slowly up her thighs, grabbing her shift as I go. By the time I raise it over Sansa's head she's slightly gasping and more than eager to bare more of herself to me.
I quickly roll us over to be situated on my knees between her creamy thighs, needing to see all of her unobstructed.
Sansa is sent directly from the gods I don't believe in.
My cock is back to being achingly hard from just the sight of her. Lying on her back, flaming hair fanned out around her, supple breasts with rose tipped nipples rising with each harsh pant of breath, the skin of her belly is milky white and perfect, save for a beauty mark on her right hip.
I'm about to stop my staring to kiss the freckle when I see the end of an angry, raised, red line barely visible over the curve of her left hip. I stop immediately to gently turn Sansa's body to the side so I can follow the scar.
I suck in an involuntary breath when I glimpse her lower back. Sansa's skin is marred with what was once a very deep cut. It starts almost at the bottom of her spine and stops where I first noticed it. It's crooked and jagged and awful. My little bird, what have you truly been through? Without realizing my actions, I trace the length of her scar with the lightest touch I can manage.
Sansa trembles and when I look back to her face I find a lone tear rolling down her temple.
"He used Joffrey's same words when he did that to me. Told me how he liked me pretty. I tried to fight him off that night, didn't think I could survive one more encounter with him. This was my punishment." She tells me, looking down to where my finger is still touching the raised skin of her back. "The other beatings, the torturing, they all healed." Her eyes drop to study the furs on the bed, her voice sounding smaller than I've ever heard. "Ramsey said that no one would want me if I ever escaped or outlived him. No longer a maiden...no longer beautiful, and what else did I have to offer?"
I have to swallow my anger and the rising sick feeling in my stomach. Maybe the Lord of Light can bring back the pieces of that disgusting excuse for a human and I can end him, slowly, evilly. Pushing away my remorseful and guilty thoughts I focus on Sansa.
"Little bird." I pause and wait for her to look at me, when she's ready, before continuing. "You are the Lady of fucking Winterfell. You have more to offer than most men and women in the entire realm. Including that dragon girl." She looks like she wants to chastise me, regardless of her own opinions, but decided against it. "The North counts on you, believes in you. Your remaining family loves you, so does that bloody Brienne and the Imp too." Her mouth opens to protest but I place my hand on her cheek, running my thumb along her lips to silence her.
"You are the only person, since my sister, that has meant a damn thing to me. The only person I've ever wanted and not just to lie with." I confirm when she glances down at my cock, leaking once again. "And that one scar does not take away from your beauty. Not one fucking bit. I've seen many pretty faces in my years but no one can even hope to compete with you. Your face alone stops people in their tracks."
I start caressing her as I did over her shift but this time I give in to us both and trace around her pebbled nipples making her gasp. "Without your clothes on you're somehow even more fucking beautiful, I can barely think while looking at you like this."
"I'll never mark you like he did. But don't misinterpret my meaning, I do want to mark you, as mine, in a moment of pleasure. I want every man and woman here to know you belong to me. To know that you want me and ask for me to share your bed."
I worry that was too much, maybe Sansa can't handle being marked in any way after what she's suffered. But she calms any regrets in my mind with her next words.
"I hope you'll share in my heart as well Sandor." She admits shyly yet seriously.
"I want every fucking piece of you that you're willing to give, little bird. All of it."
I remove her small clothes then and get my first look at the treasure between Sansa's legs. Her aurburn curls and the insides of her thighs are damp with arousal and I can't suppress my sound of pleasure.
"You're dripping for me Sansa." I growl into her ear as I softly glide my fingers down the length of her slit.
Between the smell and feel of her and my throbbing cock I was surprised I was able to concentrate on pleasing her. But I found the little nub at the top of her cunt and pressed on it before rubbing circles.
"Oh gods!" Sansa yelped, back arching.
"Yes little bird let me hear you." I tell her.
I continued to rub and press on that pearl until she was trembling and then I eased one finger inside of her. When I was knuckle deep we both froze. She is so bloody tight I'm scared I've hurt her already. Will my cock even fit for fucks sake?
When Sansa moans and throws her head back I add another digit and curl them within her, looking for that ridge of nerves that I've only ever heard of. I start kissing down her neck again, continuing down her chest to her breasts. I suck on one hardened nipple and then show the same attention to the other.
"Sandor." She moans wantonly, her center gushing more fluid.
That's all I can handle. I remove my hand from her cunt and before she can question me I lick the length of her slit, finally tasting her.
"Fuck you taste good little bird." I breathe against her and then suck on her pearl and bring her legs over my shoulders.
Sansa is pulling on my hair and moaning non-stop. It's all I can do to not cum again. I use my thumbs to pull her lips open and lap at her with long, firm strokes of my tongue until she's shaking again.
"Please Sandor please." She begs.
I hope like hell I really know what I'm doing and can answer her plea. I return my two fingers inside of her, sliding in easier as she has become so wet, curling them once more before latching my lips back onto that nub again.
It only took seconds before I felt the muscles of her quim fluttering and then gripping my fingers so hard I couldn't move them.
"Yes ohhh yes." Sansa moans over and over.
As soon as she relaxed enough I withdrew my fingers to suckle them and my palm clean of her cum, never breaking eye contact. Sansa pulled me down and crushed her lips against my own, plunging her tongue into my mouth.
"See little bird, I told you that you taste good, so fucking good. Better than the sweetest honey." We both shudder as my cock runs along her slit as I brace myself over her body.
Sansa grinds her hips against my own in an effort to feel the friction again and whines in frustration when I pull back.
"Are you sure?" I can't go on without knowing she's truly certain of her decision.
"Yes I am. I want this, I want you Sandor." She answers as she cups my face and caresses my scars.
"I have never wanted anything as much as I want you right now." I tell her as I coat my length in her wetness.
Supporting my weight on one arm I use the hand of the other to guide my weeping tip to her entrance. It takes every ounce of strength in my body to not slam inside of her. But I don't. I slowly push inch by inch and we're both panting when I'm only halfway sheathed in her heat. I can barely believe it's possible to feel this bloody good but I can see Sansa is in pain, her eyes giving her away.
"Do you want me to stop?" I ask as I hold her face in my palm, rubbing my thumb across her cheekbone.
"No please don't stop. Keep going slow." I only obey once I see the slightest hint of pleasure in her heated gaze.
I urge her legs to wrap around my waist and reach down to massage her little nub and press forward again. This angle allows me to go deeper into her quim and I bottom out soon after.
"Little bird." I choke out, dropping my forehead to her chest. We lay like that for a few moments as I bring myself back from the edge of my release and while I let Sansa's breathing calm.
My fingers have never left the pearl at the top of her slit and it doesn't take long for Sansa to experimentally move her hips against mine.
"Oh! You can move now. Please." She tells me breathily.
Bracing myself with one arm and finding her hand above her head with the other, I pull almost completely out of her cunt and then slowly push back in. And I swear I see stars. I've never felt anything like fucking Sansa Stark. Over and over I keep up a tortuously slow and deep pace, rolling my hips against her pelvic bone each time making sure to rub against that magic button of hers.
"Little bird, ah fuck, you feel fucking amazing wrapped around my cock." I growl against her ear making her tremble and then I find her lips with my own in a kiss that steals my breath away.
Sansa is saying incoherent words in between breathy moans and yelps of my name. I sped up slightly but start fucking her deeper on every stroke and my balls begin to slap against her round ass each time. I can feel her walls flutter again and know she's close as am I.
I run a hand down her body to where we're connected to press and rub her now swollen nub, needing her to finish first.
"Little bird, look at me. I want to see your beautiful face when you cum all over me." I demand, looking into her eyes. They're almost black, her pupils blown with desire.
One last punishing slam of my hips and her cunt begins squeezing my cock over and over while her cum runs down her thighs.
"Sansa!" I roar. Her release has triggered my own and two strokes later I press my cock as deep as I can and spill my seed inside of her.
Placing my forehead against her own I try my best to keep my weight off of her, not ready to pull out of her heat yet. Sansa runs her fingers through my hair and languidly kisses me as we both calm down from our high.
Happy. I truly did feel happy in that moment. Everything else has faded away, the Iron Throne, the dragon girl, Cersei, none of it is important. This is all that matters, just the two of us.
Carefully I pull out of Sansa, causing us both to groan. Before I lie down next to her, I see my seed leaking from her pretty pink cunt and it's enough to almost have my cock stirring already.
To stop myself from taking her again, I quickly lay down on my back and pull her to my side. My little bird immediately has her head on my chest, as an arm snakes around my middle and a long leg tangles with one of my own. She's a puddle of Sansa, sated, tired and smiling. I want her like this every chance I can get.
"Sandor that was-. I mean to say...I can't describe it. I didn't think it could feel so wonderful. Is it always like that?" She asks against my skin, nuzzling me.
I press a kiss to the top of her head before answering. "Aye my little bird, with us it will be. I am going to be inside of you whenever you'll let me from now on."
"Mmm, sounds perfect to me." She mumbles falling asleep.
I wrap her up in my arms, holding her probably a bit too tightly but I never want this night to end.
"Sleep now my little love." I whisper against her hair, thinking she had already succumbed to slumber.
Sighing deeply she breathed out a barely audible "love." I'm not sure if I'm terrified or relieved that she heard my term of endearment but there was no need to fret long as I too was asleep in mere moments.
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Picture this. It's summer 2015, my family and I are on vacation in the UK. We go there a lot (every year, at least once for my entire life, and I'm oldish) but we still enjoy tourist attractions. So there we are, outside Victoria Station in London purchasing Big Bus Tour tickets (way expensive, always buy online in advance), enjoying a simple day in the city, right? WRONG. My mom is paying, my husband and daughter are talking and there's me standing next to them minding my own business when I see her. Nathalie Emmanuel. And her bodyguard. They were casually walking down the street and INTO Victoria Station. I was totally star struck and just stood mouth agape watching her walk away. Her real and TV names both escaped me and as she walked through the doors I was only able to say to my mom "Khalessi's friend!" Over and over. Apparently I forgot Emilia's name as well. Anyway, I checked her socials at some point and she had posted a picture from a pub that was just down the road from where we were. Sigh. I can confirm Nathalie is even more beautiful in person and looked very happy. I'll never forget that day. Or my slow, awed brain that made me miss out on a picture and/or autograph. Honestly, just a wave would've made my life.