Chapter 33- Dove Rosestar

I wake up in my shelter, still clutching my parcel from last night. I wait a moment, listening for anyone nearby, but there's nobody around that I can hear. So I push the bushes off the top and sit up, stretching out my legs that have been cramped all night.

It's a little past dawn now, the best time to start moving; before the sun comes up and burns me even more than it already has. Before I get going, I drink some more water, leaving a little for later, and eat the last of my stew. I'm going to need staying power today if I'm going to find Cabel without getting killed.

Finally, I look around me and try to figure out the best way to go. I don't want to go towards the mountain, and I'm definitely not going in the direction of the river. As far as I can figure, I'm in the middle between the pyramids and the mountain. And by that logic, Cabel can be anywhere.

I hate to do it, but I think the best route to take is towards the pyramids again. Cabel might be around there somewhere, and I have to find him.

And so, draping the parachute over my head and then putting the hat on top, I walk away from my makeshift shelter, stew cannister in one hand, my water bottle in the other. It's all I have in the arena.

The sun rises beautifully over the sand, sending shadows everywhere. It's going to take me a long time to reach the pyramids, and I'm not really wanting to go anywhere near them. I think I'll take a detour around them, so I can avoid those spiders. My heart rate picks up every time I think of them. Giant, hairy spiders grabbing my ankles… it's too horrible to think about, let alone relive.

Nobody is around, so it gives me an opportunity to think. This is the first time I've ever been without Cabel nearby. I'm scared, and really paranoid because there's a bunch of other tributes who want to kill me right now, but it's also peaceful. Like in the Training Center, I can be just Dove for once. Of course, I want to find my brother. We're both getting out of here alive. But for now, I can just be me. Sunburnt Dove Rosestar.

Who's left? I know the girl from 11 died last night. So, both from 1 and 2, the girl from 4, I think the little girl from 3, the one with the really long blonde hair; pretty sure both from 5, me and Cabel of course; maybe the girl from 7? I don't know. I'm tired of counting the others, so I just watch the sun come up.

Before long, the desert is sweltering. The silky parachute keeps my head cool for a little while, but not for long. The wind whistles through the dunes in a strange, haunting music. In some places, the sand is built up higher than a building, and it gives the atmosphere a lonely, deserted feel. It also makes me worried; anyone could be hiding in the dunes, watching me.

I wonder how Mum is faring at home. Both Cabel and I have made it to day 3. Day 3? I've been in the arena three days already? Time stretches and shrinks in alarming ways here. It feels like only yesterday I was in the Capitol, but at the same time, the desert is eternal. Does that even make sense?

I jump as something comes alive at my feet, and I dodge a snake that's half buried in the sand. It hisses at me but settles back down into the sand. How many other things are waiting for me under my feet? I notice more things after that; lizards that run and slink around the hills, some birds with short beaks that flutter around, but seem to pose no threat to me. Perhaps this desert isn't as lifeless as I thought.

Once the sun is well up, I need to stop for a drink. I'm nearly out, and that worries me. I don't want to be stuck out here without water again; it nearly killed me yesterday, and this little water that Lexa sent me hasn't been enough. I'm still so thirsty. Before moving on again, I pile my hair up on top of my head with the parachute, then put the hat on again. Having long, loose hair is way too hot.

Shuffled sand alerts me to someone behind me. I whirl around, gripping my water bottle and stew cannister tightly. She tries to hide, but I'd know her anywhere. Curly red hair hiding behind a sandbank? It's the girl from 7.

"I know you're there," I say, my heart beating fast. She comes out, limping slightly. She holds an axe in her hand. Of course, District 7; lumber and axes.

"How long have you been following me?" I ask. Why am I making conversation with this girl? She's older and definitely stronger than me, so why am I not running?

"Not long."

"I'm amazed I didn't see you before, what with your hair," I say, gesturing slightly. I notice that her lips aren't cracked; she's had water in the past while. "Where'd you get the water?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" she says with venom. Cedar, I remember her name from the interviews. Her name is Cedar.

Even with her leg which is obviously hurt, she's quick. I step back quickly as she lunges at me, swiping the axe in front of my face and narrowly missing. She's meaning to kill me, and my survival instinct goes into overdrive. I may not be strong, but I'm quick.

As she comes for me again, I run up a nearby sand dune, so I'm a little bit above her. Cedar makes a frustrated noise, then she throws her axe at me in a fit of apparent rage. That was a bad idea; she's unarmed now, and she realizes it about five seconds after the axe leaves her hand. Armed or unarmed, though, she could kill me. The sand under my feet slips and I slide down, slamming into Cedar and knocking her over. I've lost my water bottle, it's somewhere on the ground but I don't know where, but I have my cannister still gripped in my fist. I'm freaking out, I'm scared, and I'm trying to stay alive. Forget being alone, I want Cabel, I want some help right now!

Cedar lands a punch on my face, making me cry out. "Get away!" I shriek, trying to back away, but she comes at me, fingernails bared, trying to slash my face.

Without thinking, I swing the cannister and it makes contact with her head. Cedar grabs her temple and wails, a horrible sound of pain. I'm breathing heavy, trying to get away, and then she's coming at me again, trying to kill me still, and I slam the cannister into her head again and again until she falls back into the sand, twitching slightly.

I cover my mouth at the sight of the dent in Cedar's temple. Oh my god, did I do that? I look down at my hand and it's wet with blood, and Cedar's head is bleeding into the sand and into her red hair, and she's staring, not doing anything but moaning a little and breathing softly.

Then she stops breathing and the cannon fires.

I propel myself backwards, pushing myself away from Cedar, who's lying in bloody sand now, her red curls spread out around her head like a halo. I killed her, I killed her! I think to myself. I'm a murderer. I can't react now, I have to go, the audience is watching me right now for sure; I can't show that I'm this horrified.

Move, Dove. Move! I scramble to my feet, leaving the bloody canister where it lies. I can't take it with me, not now. I grab my water bottle, and after jogging a distance away, I turn back and find Cedar's axe lying in the sand. I'm armed now, but I don't know what I'm thinking, what I'm feeling. I killed a person!

I run, staggering through the shifting sand, only looking back once; I see the hovercraft come down and pick Cedar up. The last I see of the girl from District 7 is her red hair, shining in the hot desert sun.

I killed her.

Then I turn and run, my thoughts and deeds destroying me from the inside out.