Part Nine

Rated Mature.

SAKURA'S POV

"You're going to need a bigger backpack if you're going to take all those stuffed animals with you." I was helping Shoda pack for the weekend; Sasuke would be picking him up in a few hours. We decided to play hooky; I had to spend time with him before he was gone.

"How about you leave some here with me?" I asked but he focused on which animal he would carry and which ones he would pack. "You're only going to be gone two days."

"No toy gets left behind, mommy." His green eyes are serious as he looks at me. "I have to take them all."

I sighed, "All right. I'll check the closet for another bag."

The smile on his face was worth it.

No such luck in the hall closet but I know I have an old backpack that I used for high school and college, I found it in the back of my closet. it is dirty from use but it will do. The backpack is baby blue color, I unzipped the bag to make sure it is empty but it was not.

At the bottom of the bag is a plastic picture frame that I used to have as a keychain, I slowly pulled the frame out and the pang in my chest hit hard. I know what picture is framed in this keepsake; I run my thumb over his face. It is from our prom night, Naruto managed to capture Sasuke actually smiling and I am there to witness it. It was the only picture I carried with me, I burned the rest along with his old shirts that I used as pajamas. When I moved to Suna, I thought I got rid of everything but this one slipped through the cracks.

Why.

Why? Why is it so hard to let go.

Why can't I free myself from this sadness, Sai's right I need to learn to let go but I can't – because of Sasuke and Ino.

"Mommy?" I jumped slightly as Shoda entered my bedroom. "Did you find a bag?"

"Uh, yes." I clutched the plastic frame tightly in my hand. "You can use my old backpack until we can get a bigger one."

"K." He was satisfied, "What's in your hand?" He asked, curiously.

"Oh, this." I held it out for him to see, "It's a picture of your father at our high school prom." He takes the photo from me.

"Can I keep it?" He asks and those big green eyes are so pure that I cannot bear to tell him no.

"Of course you can." I ruffle his hair as he smiles up at me.

"Oh, I almost forgot – your name. Would you like to change it to match your father's?" I totally forgot about that conversation, if Shoda was okay with it than I would change it.

"You'd be Shoda Uchiha, not Shoda Haruno."

He fiddled with the frame in his hands, "Do I have too?"

I frowned, "No, you don't but I just thought I would give you the option. Only if you want too."

"Can I think about it?" He asked, quietly with his eyes glued on the floor.

"Shoda changing your name doesn't change you, okay. You'll always be my son." I reassured him because I secretly hoped he would take his father's name, only when he was ready – I did not give Sasuke a chance when it came to Shoda, but I hoped Shoda would be different.

"Alright, you're all packed and ready to go." I huffed as I flopped on the couch; Shoda flopped down right beside me, and cuddled close to my side.

"What's daddy like?" Such an innocent question but it sent my anxiety through the roof. I rubbed the bridge of my nose, this should be expected but if he would have waited another thirty minutes than Sasuke could have explained just who he is.

"It's been too long, Shoda. Your father isn't the same man that I knew when I was younger." This was true, Sasuke changed because of what happened, we aged and grew apart.

His little face rested against my arm, "What was he like?"

It has been so long that I cannot remember anything other than the mistake he made, that one mistake shined brighter than all the good he did for me.

I sighed.

"I met your father when I was twelve, and he hated me." Shoda sat straight up and looked at me with those big eyes. I giggled, "In the beginning I was quite annoying. It'll get better I promise." I pulled him back into that warm spot he created.

"Your father was a difficult person to get close too, he'd constantly try to shut me out of his life but I didn't give up."

"Because you love him." Shoda chimed in.

"Ah, at the time – yes, I loved your father very much. He suffered a great loss at such a young age that it completely broke him. He was moody, quiet and sad even if he did not show it – I knew he felt alone. I couldn't bear to see him that way so I didn't give up." I shrugged my shoulders and looked over at Shoda, "Eventually, he realized that I was not going to quit and little by little he let me in."

"Does daddy not love you the same? Is that why we aren't a family."

"Shoda, you're killing me." I exclaimed.

"I just want to know..." His little voice was no more than a whisper.

I took a deep breath. "I'm sorry; it's not your fault." I squeezed him tight against me. "A promise was broken and unfortunately we can't take it back."

It was quiet for a moment, I prayed I answered all his questions – I did not want to go through a trip down memory lane.

A knock on the door caused us both to jump up from the couch; I opened the door to find Sasuke standing there.

"Hi." He adverted his gaze from mine, which was fine with me after the conversation with Shoda about Sasuke's past, it was hard to erase that image of him in my mind as a child all alone.

"Hey." I replied, "He's ready. I hope you have enough trunk space because he packed his whole bedroom."

"I need choices, mommy." Shoda said as he appeared from behind the door with his backpack on his back, he was ready to go.

"Of course you do." I kneeled down in front of him. "I'll miss you." We embraced for a moment before I released him. "Call me if you need me, okay."

Shoda nodded his head.

I stood up and handed Sasuke his other backpack and suitcase. "His bedtime is 8:30, no sweets after 7 and make sure he brushes his teeth." I rambled on but then stopped myself, I brushed a strand of hair behind me ear. "Sorry, it's your house and your rules."

"I'll keep his routine the same." Sasuke said, "Anything else?"

"I'm not allowed to watch scary movies, I can't jump on the couch, and I have to sleep in my own bed now because I'm a big boy." Shoda named on three fingers.

Sakura rubbed the back of her neck, "I think that covers it."

"All right." Sasuke turned toward Shoda, "Ready to go? We have a plane to catch."

I watched as Sasuke helped Shoda into his car and loaded up the bags, I really was going to be without him for two days! The possibilities are endless, I did not have to cater to no one but myself for the weekend, and I was going to make the most of it.

Starting with my date!

Sai would not give me all the details about the restaurant, but he did say I would need a fancy dress for the occasion. This is the first date I have been on in ages, I was determined to go all out for it – I shaved my legs, exfoliated, tried on more dresses than I care to count and redid my make up three times.

I decided on a fitted red dress that reached mid-thigh with nude heels, I left my hair straight down my back with dangling earrings that sparkled in the light, my make-up was not much I made an effort to actually wear eyeshadow and red lipstick that I thought made my lips look fuller.

All and all I was satisfied with the outcome.

"Shoda, your mother still has it." I whispered to myself as I smoothed out the dress while looking in the mirror. My last touch was a little perfume here and there, and a small clutch to hold my keys and phone. I was putting on my heels when I heard a knock on the door.

Instantly butterflies filled my stomach, from nervousness and excitement I wanted tonight to go really well. I took a deep breath, and shook my hands as if I was trying to get rid of the jitters.

You can do this, Sakura.

I opened the door and smiled as my eyes drank in the man in front of me; he is wearing a black button down with a charcoal-colored jacket and matching slacks and his hand was in his pocket while the other is holding a single white rose, long stemmed – Sai has taste. His hair is brushed off to the side, only enough to actually see his stormy grey eyes, he looks ridiculously handsome.

"Hi." My voice sounds a little breathless, "You look nice."

The understatement of the century.

"Beautiful." His eyes skimmed over my frame and I feel the heat rise to my cheeks. "You look amazing, Sakura." He says with a smile.

"Thank you." I blush even redder at his compliments.

"This is for you." He hands me the rose and it is lovely – it is nicely bloomed with no blemishes, purely white and delicate.

I bought the flower to nose to smell, the aroma was pleasant and fresh.

"It reminded me of you."

My heart skipped a beat, my eyes flashed to his and he is smiling at me with a look of adoration in those dreamy eyes.

"Thank you, Sai its lovely." I cannot help the grin that spreads across my face, and I cannot express how much I will treasure this moment.

"Are you ready? We have reservations."

"Oh yes, let me put this inside." I took his gift, placed on the entry table, and grabbed my clutch. "Shall we." I locked up behind me.

The drive to the restaurant is filled with small talk and comfortable silence and once we have arrived, Sai helps me out of the car as the valet takes the keys.

His hand stays on the curve of my back as he leads me into the restaurant, then his hand disappears as he pulls out my chair for me and I miss the warmth that he placed there.

"Such a gentleman." I teased, and he smiled back at me as we took our seats.

"Wine?" The server asks as I glance over the menu.

"Yes, please." Sai answers for us both. The restaurant was an excellent choice; it is very intimate and private.

The wine is served and we have placed our orders, I cannot help but chuckle lightly because for the first time this week I am happy and relaxed.

"What's so funny?" He asks.

"I am just happy." I can tell by the look on his face that he is happy too. "This is so nice and you've been so great to me, I'm going to make it up to you."

"This is more than enough." He says, "But, if you're that committed than go out with me again."

"We haven't even finished this date yet." I exclaimed. "What if you think I am weird by the end of the night? We haven't spent that much alone time together."

He smirks at me. "You are weird."

"Hey." I laughed.

"But I like it." I was caught in his gaze, "You're funny and kind, being weird is just a bonus."

It is not a love confession but my heart speeds up, it has been so long since I have had these feelings spiraling inside of me.

"How are you not married, Sai?"

I'm curious, he's handsome and stable; any woman would pick up on his looks alone and getting to know him would seal the deal.

He looks uncomfortable for a moment and I wonder if I worded the question wrong.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked that."

"It's nothing to be sorry about and honestly it's because I'm a doctor. My time could not be split between a relationship and surgery especially back in medical school. I decided that I could only focus on one and I chose my career in the beginning."

"I can understand that, I had to choose between my career and motherhood." A feeling of sadness washes over me for a second, if things were different I could have been a doctor right now in this moment.

"Do you regret it?" He asked.

"No, never." My eyes locked onto his, "Shoda is …. He's the most precious thing in the world to me."

"I thought so." He smiled and took a sip of his wine, my eyes lingered on his mouth and watched as he used his thumb to wipe away some of the wetness. I replay the kiss we shared that night of the banquet, his lower lip is slightly fuller than the top, and I can't help but want to bit that little bit of flesh.

I wish I was that thumb. I wish we were not in public.

"Sakura?" His voice has a playful tone. "Are you listening?"

"Hmm?" My eyes flash to his, I can feel my ears burning, as his lips pull into a devilish smirk, and I realize I have been caught staring.

"I said would you like some more wine?"

"No, no waters fine right now." I grabbed my glass and gulped some down because all this heat was going to burn me from the inside out.

Dinner was great, the food was perfect and when it was time to go Sai asked if I wanted to walk with him for a bit.

My heels clicked against the sidewalk as we walked quietly into the night, the sky is lit up with the bright stars, with a cool breeze every now and then and I'm content as people pass us by.

"Here." I feel a weight on my shoulders and I realize its Sai's jacket.

"Oh, are you sure?" I asked shyly.

"It's fine, keep it on." He looks so cute and innocent as he looks away, hiding a blush of his own.

"Thank you." I whispered, and his scent engulfs me as we walk. I pull the jacket closer around me and nuzzle my face into the collar of the jacket where his scent is the strongest.

Vanilla and Patchouli.

His scent warms my body and brings me such comfort.

I decided to be bold and walk close enough that our shoulders touch every so often, he tensed and I thought I should back off but soon arm wraps around my waist pulling me closer than before. That is how we stayed until it was time to go back home.

"Would you like to stay for some tea?" I asked as I unlocked my front door, my heart pounded in my chest as I waited for him to answer.

"Are you sure?" He asked and he seemed a little hesitant as I watched him.

"Yes." I bit my bottom lip.

He nodded his head and stepped inside my apartment as I closed the door behind us, I slipped off my heels by the door.

"Have a seat. I'll start on the tea." I quickly excused myself into the kitchen as Sai walked into the living room.

I managed to get the kettle on the stove but the tea was on the top shelf in the cabinet, and no matter how far I stretch my arms and stood on my tippy toes I could not reach it.

"Damn it, who put it there in the first place!" I silently cursed.

I reached for it again, adding a little jump but I flinched when I heard Sai's voice from behind me.

"Need help?" He was standing there with his arms crossed, his jacket was missing and he was smiling at me with humor dancing in his eyes.

"Oh, please I can't reach."

"I can see that." He walked up to me and reach for the box of tea without any trouble, he kept his eyes locked with mine, and I was caught like prey against his chest.

"Here." He sat the box on the counter but still the eye contact did not break. My heart started to race, because he did not move, he didn't back up but his face was coming closer and soon our breaths tangled together.

"Sakura."

His hand cups my face and I lean into his touch, "You're so beautiful." He thumb runs under my bottom lip. "So soft and warm."

The tension is building if he does not kiss me now, I'm going to melt right there on my kitchen floor into a mess of pink goo. He hasn't even kissed me yet but he's so close that his scent is suffocating and I can taste it on my tongue.

When Sai's lips touch mine it's slow but it blurs my senses, his hand tangles in my hair as I grip the collar of his shirt.

Sai pulls back too soon, that kiss wasn't enough, I want more.

"Sai." I whispered against his lips, when I open my eyes he's looking back me with want and lust swirling around in a grey pool and I want nothing more than for him to kiss me again.

I ran my hands up from his collar to the back of his neck, bury my hands into his dark, soft hair, and bring his mouth back mine.

Our lips mash together, it's moist and hot and breathy. A moan escapes my throat, and his tongue runs across my bottom lip begging for an entrance and I am not going to deny him. His tongue slides against mine tasting and caressing as his hands leave tingles down my sides.

Sai firmly grabs the back of my thighs and lifts me onto the counter as if I weigh nothing and he is between my legs ravishing my mouth with his kisses. I wrap my legs around his middle, bringing him in closer and I can feel his arousal against my warm center as he grinds into me.

I cannot help but moan into his mouth because of the fiction he's creating between my legs. His lips kiss down my jaw to my throat that I bear for him because it feel so good when bites in the right spot. Chills run up my spine when I feel his hands skim up my legs and under my dress that is practically hiked up and giving him a show.

"Sakura." He sounds breathless against my throat; he does not stop placing open mouth-kisses along my collarbone. "You smell so good." He groans.

His words do nothing to soothe the ache between my legs; if anything, it intensifies the feeling.

His mouth is back on mine and I suck on his lower lip causing him to make the most erotic sound that shoots straight to the fire in my belly.

"Fuck." His eyes are screwed shut and I take the opportunity to kiss and suck on his neck, I can feel him tremble against me. His fingers ran up and down my thighs before he gets bold and dips his hand into the front of my panties.

My breath catches as he finds the precious pearl between my legs and rubs the pad of his thumb against it. My hands tighten in his hair and he rubs so slowly against that bundle of nerves, I am practically panting against his neck.

"Does that feel good, Sakura?" I can sense a smirk on his lips, he is proud of his handy work that he can get me so riled up - breathless even. When he runs his finger up and down my slit, coating it in my arousal and slides it into me, my head rolls back and he kisses my neck as he moves inside of me.

I moan and bit my lip as he adds another finger; the delicious feeling of being stretched is too much for me, "You sound so sexy." He says in a smoky voice as his lips brush against my ear.

It has been so long, I am about to fall apart with his words and his fingers pumping in and out of me, it is all I can focus on. How he makes my body feel, its fucking heaven.

"Please." I beg.

Don't stop.

Ringing. What is ringing? Sai's touch disappears and I whimper in disappointment.

"Sakura, your phone - it's ringing." He whispers against my cheek.

I blink a couple of times, trying to process on what's happening because I was close, so close and now the coil in my belly is gone. The moment was gone.

"My what?"

"Your phone." He backs away from me and I take a moment to soak in what just happened and what was going to happen if my phone was on silent.

"Phone? Oh! I'm so sorry." I tell him and hop off the counter, pulling my dress down where it's supposed to be.

"It's fine, Sakura." He follows me out of the kitchen.

It is so not fine.

It's past eleven, who'd be calling me this late? I swear if it's Naruto I'm going to hang him by his toenails the next time I see him.

"Who is it?" Sai asks, and my stomach tightens as I see Sasuke's number flash across the screen.

I give him this nervous smile and he understands whose calling.

"It could be Shoda, I need to - I have to."

"Sakura, answer the phone already." His smile is reassuring.

I nod my head.

"Hello?" The line is quiet expect for a small whine that I recognized as Shoda's.

"Shoda, baby, what's wrong?"

"I want to come home." He sniffs, and my heart sinks.

"Why Shoda? Did something happen?"

"I had a nightmare, and daddy doesn't know how to fix it."

I sighed in relief, a nightmare I could handle.

"Shoda, give the phone to your father. I'll tell him what he needs to do."

"I want you to do it, mommy." He whined.

"Shoda, you're going to have to big boy. Trust me, your father can do what I can do."

She could hear some noise in the background before Sasuke spoke.

"I'm bringing him home now. I have a plane waiting for us, I just want you to know."

"No, cancel the flight. He's going to stay and I'll tell you what you need to do." Sasuke is going to have learn what Shoda likes, what he doesn't and how to handles things like this.

"Are you sure?" He seemed surprised.

"Sasuke, you're going to have to learn everything about Shoda and he needs to get to know you. He's staying. Now, when he has a nightmare he likes his green dinosaur the most because he thinks it can fight off monsters, second read a book with the funny voices, that's important and after that you have to lay in bed with him and rub his back until he finally falls asleep."

It was quiet for a moment.

"Got it?" I asked.

"Yes."

"Good, have him call me tomorrow."

"I will. Goodnight Sakura."

"Bye Sasuke."

I hung up the phone and sighed, hopefully Sasuke can handle it.

"Everything alright?" Sai asked.

"Yup, Shoda had nightmare but Sasuke can handle it."

"Good, uh, I better go." Sai walked toward the front door.

"Oh, okay." I tried not to sound disappointed but I was.

At the door he kissed me goodbye, "I really enjoyed tonight."

I blush creeped up on me. "So did I."

"I'll call you." He says.

"Okay." I smiled and I watched him get to his car before locking the door. I leaned against it, and replayed our heated moment on the kitchen countertop. I don't think I'll be able to cook in there without remembering the feeling of his lips against my skin.

Yes, Sasuke has his own company plane! How lucky.

Sasuke's POV next.