New chapter, new POV.
Some conversations at the beginning of the chapter are adapted from pages 4355, 4356, 4372, and 4383-5 from the canon.
Chapter 2: Dream bubble
Kanaya was living the dream, or as close to it as reasonable in their current circumstances. She was a rainbow drinker now, something she had dreamed of since she was a wiggler, and she was finally meeting Rose Lalonde in person. THE Rose Lalonde. The fact that she could feel the warm touch of sunlight on her skin again was also wonderful. Yes, they had had casualties but, truthfully, none of them where from her inner circle of friends. As far as she knew, Nepeta and Feferi had both been sweet girls that didn't deserve to die, but she hadn't properly interacted with them before the game, so she didn't really feel sad about it. Equius was too weird and uncomfortable for Kanaya's tastes, both in person and through trollian. For this reason, even if he was not that bad, she was indifferent to his fate. Travros, instead, had been the cause of too much pain for Kanaya, as a consequence of Vriska's obsession over him, to trigger her compassion now. Kanaya knew very well that jealousy was not a good look for anyone, and that it could be argued that it had not been Tavros's intention to hurt her like that. But the fact was that he did, for sweeps. She had tried to forgive him, helping Equius to give him robotic legs, but even then, he had been a failure of a troll in her opinion. She certainly could not see how his life being spared could have improved their chances of survival. It was probably for the better that he was dead, he would be able to stop being so afraid of everything, now that the worst had already happened.
Eridan instead was a completely different case. They used to talk a lot before the game, probably as a sense of solidarity for their similar relationship's problems. Both of them felt trapped in a moirallegiance with someone whom they had flush feelings for, so, in a way, there was a kind of companionship between them. The violet-blood used to say that if he ever decided to commit genocide on all land-dwelling trolls, he promised to spare her life. But then, Eridan destroyed the matriorb and killed her in cold blood. That was the end of their almost-friendship, and Kanaya didn't regret killing him, he had deserved that and more. So, yes, they had had fatalities, but Kanaya still had those she cared for most, so it didn't really bother her. In a way, it reminded her of the cavern's trials that the young wigglers had to overcome before being selected by a lusus. As a jade-blood, Kanaya understood perfectly that trials like that were vital for a sustainable, strong, healthy population. It was nature's law. She only regretted that Gamzee had survived, too.
Karkat slipped behind her, trying to hide from everybody's sight for once, and Kanaya couldn't supress a smile. She was so glad that he was all right now. She had been so worried when he fell on his knees next to Sollux's dead body, crying desperately and not answering to her voice. He had probably been in shock, the poor creature. And, judging from the intense almost-concupiscent show he and Sollux had gifted them a few moments ago, it was understandable. She had thought that Karkat was unable to have black feelings for anyone, he had said so himself, but there was no doubt on her mind that what just transpired between the gold-blood and him was pure pitch tension. It had been almost as romantic as in her novels, only a passionate kiss was needed to make it a perfect moment. Thinking about romance, her lookstubs moved back to Rose, that was explaining her plans at the moment.
"Reasonably soon, within a certain window, it will be time to leave," she was saying. "We will then pilot this meteor as fast as we can make it go in that exact direction."
She floated and pointed in a direction into the dark surrounding them. Kanaya tried to see their possible destination but there was only the light of the Green Sun near them. Outside of its range there was only darkness.
"What's that way?" she heard Sollux ask.
"Nothing whatsoever," answered the human. "As of now, that way lies darkness and uncertainty beyond description."
It was clear than Rose was still as cryptic as always in her way of speaking, it was almost encouraging. Kanaya decided to intervene, then.
"I see," she said, making sure to keep her tone of voice neutral and constant. "Then, perhaps we should reserve the infinite darkness plan for the maybe column for now. I think I am even willing to let Dave take a crack at the logistics of this plan before we commit to that particular manoeuvre, daring though it sounds."
That did the trick, Rose turned to her and looked directly into her lookstubs. Kanaya was not sure of it, but the human seemed to be restraining a smile, forcefully keeping her composure and mannerisms. How delightful. She listened again into the conversation, which had derived into Dave monologing about spending his time composing slam poetry and drawing, with Terezi agreeing to it happily. Wigglers.
"Yes," intervened Kanaya again. "I am willing to humour elaboration on this rap centric plan and its apathy-based contingencies. Even if it sounds excessively stupid."
Rose was definitely restraining a smile now at her efforts at sarcasm. Lovely. She had to figure out the way to break her composure and properly get an honest smile from her. She would do it; she was sure of it. In due time.
"Trust me, it is," Rose said with an exasperated look towards the other human before going back to her. "Just as you should trust me that by the time we leave, if we leave exactly within the designated window and are able to travel at nearly the speed of light, the meteor will trace a route through the furthest ring which will topologically resolve as a straight line directly towards the new session. For only a brief moment, the Green Sun will be visible from that session, and we will be riding the chartreuse coattails of its photons."
That was an interesting and accurate prediction. Kanaya was suddenly curious about Rose's powers of precognition. As a Sylph, she was unfamiliar with the abilities of a Seer, even though she understood a little the burden of having knowledge of the far future. However, in Kanaya's case, those glimpses of the future had been acquired through sweeps of studying Skaia's clouds from her tower in Prospit. And, as it was revealed out later, those visions led mostly to incorrect interpretations for her part. Cloud interpretation was clearly not a feasible way to accurately predict the future.
"This is why you all needed an advanced Seer!" exclaimed Aradia, happily as always. "I have become familiar with the ways of the fabric out here, but even I couldn't chart a journey that long or complex."
"That's because it's almost impossible to do so voluntarily," agreed Rose. "If we were to head right now in the session's true physical direction, it wouldn't be long before we found ourselves traveling in just the opposite direction."
That was… interesting. And completely different of how she understood the laws of Space, her own aspect.
"This is not even to speak of the chronological peculiarities," kept explaining the human. "After traveling some distance, we could discover we were suddenly tailgating our own meteor from several days ago. If we are particularly unfortunate, we might even collide in an intersection of spacetime with a meteor piloted by our future selves. And if we looked closely at that meteor before impact, we might notice a very large dent in it, which it originally suffered during the very collision we were about to experience."
That was definitively not how space worked in Kanaya's experience. But she could understand, theoretically, how difficult would be to navigate through any long distance in a place where both time and space were not constant. As Aradia said, it would be impossible to predict unless one had the ability to see the future with extreme detail.
"It takes precision and timing to reach your destination out here, and most importantly, the grace of the gods themselves," concluded Rose.
"So, what you're saying is that we're going to be on this meteor a good while longer to get to the next session, right?" asked Vriska with a contemplative face.
"Yes," answered Rose.
"And since we apparently need mustard-blood here alive and we already lost one… " elaborated the troll. "We are not going to force his half-ghost to pop himself again like a packet of nasty fetid mustard so he can shoot this thing into hyperspace."
"You can't made me do it anyway, spidertroll," protested Sollux. "Your mind powers don't work on me half of the time."
That might be right, but everyone remembered what Vriska was able to force him to do the few times she managed to control him. Kanaya seriously hoped that Vriska would not try her tricks this time, she did not want to auspice for her again. It would be awkward considering that Kanaya had been avoiding her for almost the full 600 hours they spend playing the game.
"I'm guessing then that it'll take considerably longer to get to the next session than it did to get here?" asked Vriska, thankfully choosing to ignore Sollux's bait comment.
"Yes," repeated Rose.
"And, in your opinion, how long is this trip going to take?" kept asking Vriska.
"It's not an opinion, it's a fact," replied Rose with a bit of hostility in her tone of voice. "If we leave at the correct moment and keep travelling at almost the speed of light we will reach the next session in about three human years."
Three years. If Kanaya's estimation was correct that was approximately a sweep and a half. A sweep and a half trapped in an empty, dark, depressing meteor. She turned towards the sun; would she have to live without natural light for so long? Her skin could glow now so she would never be in total darkness, but it could not be compared to experiencing the kiss of sunlight on her skin.
"Are you completely sure that your estimation is accurate?" insisted Vriska. "It will be a long trip and we will need to manage our limited resources if we want to make it. We can't afford a mistake in the length of our trip."
At that, Rose's immutable expression seemed to crack a bit, now it was clear that she was getting annoyed by the troll's insistence and subtle insinuation that she was wrong. Remembering how destructive could Rose be when promoted, Kanaya decided to intervene.
"John also mentioned that it would be three years until we see him again," she said, sending a warning look to Vriska. "It fits with Rose's prediction."
The blue-blooded troll was clearly surprised by Kanaya's interruption, probably because she used to auspistisice Vriska's relationships with almost everyone else in the past, but she had been refusing to do it for a perigee. Exactly the same amount of time that she had been avoiding her. It was clear that Kanaya would need to talk with Vriska and formally break up their pale relationship. She had been trying to avoid it and let her acts speak for herself, but it seemed that she would need to make things obvious. Especially if they would be living together in a closed space for a sweep and a half.
"This is going to be a wonderful adventure for everyone!" exclaimed Aradia, still in her happy mood. "I'm a bit jealous, honestly! Or I would be if I wasn't having such a good time with my dead friends!"
That was the problem with Aradia, even when she had been alive, Kanaya had always considered Aradia to be selfish, focused only on herself and her wishes. She was not a bad troll per se and it was clear that she cared about her friends in her way, but at the end of the day the only thing that mattered was herself and her prophecies. During the time she had been a ghost, she had lost the ability to get happiness or to desire for anything, and the only thing that had remained was her self-preservation instincts. With the perspective of time, it was clear that Aradia had kept vital information to herself and manipulated other trolls and key elements to obtain the best outcome. It had worked in the end, they had survived until that point after all, but Kanaya never liked the feeling that all of them were only a small part of a big plan for her. Aradia had clearly recovered her enthusiasm for life when ascending to God Tier, but she was still acting exclusively on the interest of the big picture.
"So, you are not coming with us then," asked Kanaya, just to be clear.
"No," confirmed Aradia. "I still have important work to do here."
"Aaaaaww!" pouted Terezi.
Kanaya had expected that answer so she was not surprised. She checked Sollux discretely. He looked sad and like he was debating something with himself. With the way he looked sideways towards where Karkat was still half hiding, she could guess what was the gold-blooded's dilemma. She seriously hoped that he stayed, not only for Karkat's sake but for his own. It was apparent how much Karkat cared for him after the state he had been when their Sollux had died. In contrast, Aradia would probably make him a 'corpse party' with a big smile, as she had already suggested, and then forget him to go on her own adventures. A bit like it was happening now, she clearly did not seem sad or conflicted with Sollux's decision to stay.
"I have to, but that doesn't rule out the possibility we could meet again in bubbles along your journey!" was saying the red God Tier at the moment.
"I hope so," answered Terezi with clear doubt in her voice.
Kanaya looked at Terezi for a moment, remembering that she was a Seer of Mind after all, and as such, she was able to see the future decided by each chosen path. If she doubted that she would she Aradia again, it probably meant that she would indeed not see her. Kanaya turned to the Green Sun again. Suddenly, she felt sad and didn't want to leave the light. What was the point of her going to the next session, after all? Even if they managed to beat all the enemies and create a new universe, the matriorb had already been destroyed and there was no troll repopulation plan anymore. Kanaya didn't have a role anymore.
"Maybe I will stay here, too," she said aloud, her eyes still on the sun.
"Why?" she heard Rose ask.
She turned her lookstubs towards her, again. For an alien race, Rose was beautiful. Not aesthetically exactly because she was an alien after all, with strange and confusing features. She did not look bad either, but Kanaya had never been attracted to other trolls only for esthetical reasons. For Kanaya, a strong personality and intelligence had always been the most attractive traits, and those had eventually led her to appreciate other aspects, like aesthetics. Rose had both personality and intelligence, along with her strong charisma, mystery and exquisite style. It was not a surprise that Kanaya found her so intriguing. She didn't find her physical appearance more alluring that others, yet, but she was sure that she would get there eventually. With time.
"As nice as it sounds to move on, I do not know if I can stand three of your human years of more darkness," she explained, trying to transmit the idea that she would not have any complains with spending those three years with Rose if it was in other circumstances. "I like this sun. It is comforting in a strange way, almost like home."
"But what if we need your help?" asked the human.
Kanaya tried her hardest to not interpret her question as 'what if I need you?'. This was an important decision to take, and she probably should not let her infatuation determine her fate. If her heart was pumping faster than usual, nobody needed to know.
"What could I possibly do?" she asked in a sarcastic tone that made her almost proud of herself. "Aside from providing a light source as you navigate the dim corridors. I would function as a premium escort to the load gaper, and that's about it."
She was clearly improving in the correct use of sarcasm. It turned out that the key to optimal sarcastic remarks was to infuse positive sentences with a feeling of inadequacy and incompetence.
"But Kanaya, you still have an important work to finish, too!" protested Aradia. "We can't ignore our duties!"
As expected, Aradia was more worried about Kanaya failing to execute her role in her big plan than about her feelings or wishes. What a surprise. Sarcasm again, she was getting proficient at it.
"What are you talking about?" Kanaya asked her.
"Our race is extinct, remember?" she asked, as if that fact was not the reality that Kanaya had to face every day. "And after a few more casualties, it is now hanging by a thread! Your job was to see to the resurrection of our people."
"What real hope is there for that?" she asked with a resigned tone of voice. "The matriorb was destroyed and I was never able to duplicate it because the grist cost was astronomical. It's gone."
"There's always hope, though!" insisted the other troll. "You just never know, and I don't think you should give up!"
That was suspicious, especially coming from Aradia. She had always had insight of future events, after all, even if her ways were mysterious. Maybe it was not over, after all? Could it still be possible to somehow obtain a new matriorb in the new session? Oh, she wished for the ability to see the future and know the answer for sure! Although, they had a Seer of Light now, maybe she would be able to glimpse something?
"Do you know if that will happen, Rose?" she asked, trying to supress her hope. "Can you See the path to victory on this matter?"
"It's hard to say," she replied, meditatively. "Does the repopulation of your species qualify as victory? These things aren't always clear cut. Some outcomes are for your own judgment," she explained. "What outcome would you like the most?"
There were infinite outcomes that Kanaya would like to happen, especially regarding her friends and their future happiness. It was too broad to pin out a single crucial event. But regarding the troll's repopulation and her role in it, her desired outcome was clear.
"I would like to have the matriorb again and to keep it safe this time," she said and bit her lip lightly before continuing. "And I guess, I would like to not be a total failure this time."
The way that Rose was looking at her clearly softened at her words. If she had been a troll, Kanaya would have been almost sure that Rose had just felt pity for her in a good way. But she was not a troll, she was human. Pity did not have the same cultural context for them that it had for trolls, Kanaya was fully aware of it. It did not stop her feeling flustered. Oh, apparently her own skin could glow brighter sometimes, how marvellous.
" Ok," said Rose softly. "If you follow my advice, I can at least promise you will find yourself in the best position to determine whether that may come to pass."
That was not really the answer Kanaya was hoping for. In a way, she was saying that if Kanaya stayed here, she would definitively lose all opportunity to obtain a new matriorb. But going with them was not a straight answer either, it would be increasing her chances only slightly. It would mean spending a longer time hoping for a miracle, only to be plausibly disappointed in the end. She felt a hand in her posture pole, and she realised that Karkat was grabbing her clothes, maybe without realising it himself. She looked at him over her shoulder, but he was avoiding her lookstubs. Oh, he did not want her to leave either, but he would not ask her to stay and put her in a compromised situation. Sometimes Karkat was the sweetest troll.
"Can you please come?" insisted Rose, capturing her attention again. "Between the two of us, you with your inexplicably heretofore unmentioned phosphorescence, and I with my nigh-reflective traffic cone orange sun-sari, the meteor should never be too dark."
That… that was something else. Rose was being unexpectedly forthcoming and persistent that she remained with her. Between her insistence and Karkat's grip on her, she suddenly felt truly needed and appreciated. Maybe it would be reasonable to stay, even if it were only to remain with them a bit longer. And who knew what her absence could do to the timeline? She would definitively despise herself if her decision instigated the death of the few friends she still had.
"Well, all right," she accepted finally. "But must we really leave so soon?"
"It's soon or never," Rose insisted. "But not immediately. Even if the route were accessible right now, it would still behove us to wait. There's correspondence from John yet to arrive."
"Whoa, really?!" exclaimed Dave.
Kanaya throw a glance in his direction. The male human had not moved from his position, at the edge of the group but still close enough to participate in the conversation if he wished so. His body and face's expressions had remained unalterable and closed up during all their debate, and he had contributed only on spare occasions. However, now he was visibly enthusiastic and delighted with the prospect of hearing from his friend. It was almost charming, it reminded her of grubvideos of young wigglers she used to check in GrubTube. She wondered for a moment if it would still be possible to access old Alternia's internet. Most Likely not, what a shame.
"Yes, we will get it at any moment now," confirmed Rose with a smile. "And after that, we will have to wait for one final guest to appear. Then, we ride like the solar wind. The race will be afoot."
"Wait, another visitor?" asked Kanaya. "Who?"
Just then, and before anybody could answer her, a sphere of green light appeared floating in front of her. Surprised, she moved to the side just in time before something emerged from the point of light, hitting Karkat directly on his face. The troll fell to the floor and stayed there for a shocked moment, looking at the item that had been plastered against his face. The object in question looked naughtily like a filial pail, with a sheet of paper falling out of it. Someone had sent a message in a filial pail directly towards Karkat's face. That was the most depraved thing Kanaya had ever seen or read in all her life. She couldn't avoid letting out a shocked short scream, and she had to turn her face into the opposite direction while she felt her skin shine brighter than ever. It took her a moment to realise that, for the humans, a filial pail had a completely different meaning. For them it was only an object used regularly for cleaning proposes, instead of being a critical element of their sexual reproduction. She forced herself to look again and saw that Vriska was doing the same, while Terezi and Aradia looked unperturbed. Rose was looking at her with an entertained expression, and Dave was laughing at Karkat having a tantrum on the floor, his aloof act completely forgotten. Finally, she noticed that Sollux had a smidgen of gold painting his cheeks and a mocking smile directed at Karkat, even when his lookstubs kept moving repetitively to the filial pail next to the other troll. Kanaya smiled, this journey was getting more and more interesting by the second.
John's message changed hands while those interested read it. Kanaya didn't bother with it, the only John she knew was the one from the future, and everything this current John could say seemed irrelevant in comparison. She wondered if current-John had met his future version too. Probably not. For her amusement, both Vriska and Karkat seemed pleased, flustered, and scandalised with the contents of the letter, while the humans simply looked happy. On the other hand, both Sollux AND Terezi were displaying frowning faces now. Intriguing. She had expected Sollux to react poorly to Karkat being so obviously flustered by someone else's words so soon after their heated pitch moment, but not Terezi. Such marvellous intrigue everywhere. She had just had that thought, that a mysterious figure appeared in a flash of green light. It appeared to be a black carapacian wearing dirty old rags and a stash with the word MAYOR on it. He was also seriously hurt and was bleeding out from a big hole in his midsection area.
"Who's this guy?" asked Dave.
"The visitor I mentioned earlier," answered Rose while she busied herself with a glow-worm that had also appeared out of nowhere. "He will be traveling with us, too."
"Is he dead?" asked the male human again.
Terezi hunched and smelled the carapacian from closer. Then, she poked him gently with her can and the black-skinned humanoid let out a pained groan. Not dead yet but he would be soon, and it would be such a waste. So much warm blood wasted away. Kanaya froze when she realised the direction her thoughts were taking and took a few steps back. She was not hungry, not really, she had drunk quite the amount of multicolour blood in the last hour after all. However, she was still tempted by the sight of so much blood just in front of her. She tried to stop breathing in an attempt to avoid smelling the odour of metallic, bright red blood. She could not stop for long. Interesting, rainbow drinkers also needed to breathe regularly, then.
"We should be able to get him some help along the way," was saying Rose at that moment. "But only if we leave immediately. Luckily for him, we have no alternative because Jack will arrive soon."
"WHAT?!" screamed Terezi.
All the trolls turned to Rose at her comment, included Kanaya, the smell of blood suddenly forgotten. She was a Seer. If Rose was saying that Jack would arrive soon she was not guessing, she knew it was going to happen. That was a bad idea, they were not readier to fight Jack now than a couple of hours ago. If he found them here, they were as good as dead.
"When I said that the race would be afoot, I was being literal. He will follow our trail and match our speed," explained Rose. "And since this is not the ideal scenario for a final showdown, the best we can hope to do is outrun him."
Did that imply that they would be flighting Jack for one and a half sweeps? Not only would they be travelling through paradox space, in darkness and among horrorterrors, but Jack could catch them and slaughter them at any moment? Well, if they managed to maintain the same speed as him for the totality of their journey, she presumed that they would be safe. Or at least safer than if they remained there. However, that also meant that they would not have much time to organize for the final battle once they reached the new session.
"Sounds to me like it's time to hit the fucking road then," declared Karkat, always their spiritual leader. "How do we make this thing go, anyway? Sollux had to die to bring us here so I hope you are not suggesting we keep him moving this rock for a sweep and a half."
"I could do it," sulked Sollux.
"Yeah, yeah, you are the strongest psionic ever and all that," replied Karkat without even looking at him, which made him miss the way the other troll brightened at his half-handed comment. "Is there any propulsion system in this meteor that we don't know about?"
"Maybe there is, I'm not sure," Rose said, looking a bit confused for the first time. "I can See the most favourable outcome for victory, but not the details to how to get there. However, one good push in the right direction should be all we need."
"I can help with that!" offered Aradia, brightly. "Sollux, do you think you can lend me a hand? Without leaving the meteor of course."
"Huh?" muttered Sollux, with the tone of somebody that had been lost in his thoughts until hearing their name.
"They'll need the biggest push we can give them!" repeated Aradia. "Can you help me?"
"0h. Yeah, sure," answered the troll. "But Aradia, are you sure you don't want to come with us?"
"I can't, I have things to do out there," she insisted. "I will be fine, don't worry about me."
Kanaya almost facepalmed at her comment, why was Aradia always so self-centred? Kanaya knew that she could be better than this, but sometimes it looked like she did not care to try. Poor Sollux, it was painful to watch.
"And are you sure that you are fine with me staying?" kept asking him.
"Of course! You already did your role, Sollux, whatever you do from now on is your own decision!" replied Aradia with a big smile. "It will probably be better for you this way. You will be able to be alive again, and if you had come with me you would had gotten tired of tagging along, eventually."
"But…" protested the gold-blood troll.
"It's time we part ways, Sollux," reaffirmed Aradia with a kind smile.
"Oh," whispered Sollux with a sad expression in his face.
That was distressing, it was almost heartbreaking. Kanaya did not know exactly what kind of relationship did Aradia and Sollux have these days but she knew that they had been moirails a long time ago. Then, Aradia died by Sollux's hand under Vriska mind-control, and the situation become complicated. She did not know if they had officially broken their moirallegiance after that or not, but even if that had not been the case, it was certainly broken now. However, it was clear that Sollux still had feelings for her, while Aradia was, at most, only fond of him. Like how someone can be fond of an old toy or a well-loved book. Loved enough to keep it with you, but not really important or needed.
"What, so just one push is going to last three years?!" asked Karkat, suddenly. "Let alone outrun Jack?! That's bullshit!"
Kanaya blinked and looked at her friend. As a player with the aspect of Space, his comment was almost heretic. He was not that stupid; she knew he wasn't. But then why was he asking such an irrelevant question?
"Calm down KK, it should be fine," replied Sollux with an annoying tone, rolling his thinkpan in a way that would indicate him rolling up his lookstubs if he still had them. "You won't slow down."
"How the fuck do you know that?!" insisted Karkat.
Sollux let go a frustrated groan then, and Karkat's shoulders suddenly relaxed. Oh. That had been Karkat's goal from the beginning. Kanaya smiled while she realised that Sollux did not look sad anymore. Instead, he was clearly annoyed and frustrated with Karkat's apparent stupidity. It was actually such a poor act if someone knew where to look. It was clear, though, that Sollux had not noticed that Karkat had just tricked him into forgetting his sadness, momentarily.
"Troll Isaac Newton told him," answered Rose with a monotonous tone but an amused shine in her eyes. She had also figured out the ruse, then.
"Ok, whatever, let's just get on with it," shrugged Karkat, clearly not interested in keep arguing now that he had accomplished his goal."
Sollux, Aradia and Rose moved to the edge of the meteor, getting ready to launch the rock in the correct direction. Meanwhile, the rest of them turned back to the carapacian that was still unconscious on the floor.
"Should we do something with the Mayor?" asked Karkat. "Does anybody have something we could use to bandage his wound?"
Kanaya looked at her own bandage in her torso. Her wound did not hurt anymore but she was hesitant of removing her scarf so soon. She was definitely not hurting anymore but she did not want to reopen her wound and bleed out. She did not even know if rainbow drinkers could bleed but it was not the moment to experiment. No, her scarf needed to stay on her torso for now. However, it was quite long, maybe she could sacrifice a bit of it for a better cause. The scarf was already ruined with her blood anyway.
"What is he the mayor of, anyway?" she heard Dave ask while she was retracting her lipstick from her Strife deck. "It kinda looks like he just made that sash himself."
"He's the duly elected mayor of the fruity rumpus asshole factory, and he just cut the ribbon to a brand-new museum full of priceless shut-the-fuck-up," was Karkat's amusing response.
"Ok, you guys can keep arguing if you like, but I'm going to send you on your way now," announced Aradia. "Then, after you leave, I should be able to buy you a little more time. I will try to slow down Jack for a while," She offered. "It won't be for very long, but it's the best I can do!
"That should help us greatly," said Rose. "Thank you, Aradia."
"You're welcome!" replied her with a huge smile. "Are you ready, Sollux?"
Kanaya did not hear his answer over the sound of her chainsaw cutting the excess length of her scarf, keeping intact the part bandaging her torso. She quickly put away her weapon, afraid of it flying away when they began moving, and offered the violet cloth to Karkat. He smiled at her and quickly applied it to the wound of the carapacian. Just then, the meteor began moving at high speed and Kanaya had to crunch down to lower her centre of balance. The Green Sun was getting smaller behind them at a quick speed, but not as fast as it had grown on their way to it. They were going fast but not as fast as before. Sollux's ghost was standing on the edge of the meteor, looking back to where Aradia had been moments before. He looked sad but this time he was not bleeding out or screaming from excruciating pain, so Kanaya count it as an improvement. She focused on Rose then, who was walking towards them.
"How is he?" she asked to Karkat and Terezi, that were trying to bandage the carapacian torso.
"Bad, I don't know how resistant are his species, but probably he won't last long," answered Karkat, who among the trolls was the best at first-aid treatment.
"We will reach a dream bubble in a few minutes and we will find someone there that will heal him," Explained Rose. "However, I recommend that we move inside to a safer place. Preferably, we want to avoid stepping out of the physical meteor without realising it once inside the dream bubble, and end up trapped there.
"Wait, can that actually happen?" asked Karkat. "And what the fuck is a 'dream bubble'?!"
"I will explain inside, if you don't mind," insisted Rose. "We should bring our hurt friends with us, too."
With that, she gestured to the carapacian and Sollux's body with her hand. Terezi was the first to react, she grabbed the carapacian and began walking towards a transportalizer in a far corner of the part of the meteor's surface where they were at the moment. Vriska called Sollux and somehow convinced him to bring back his own dead body using his psionics. Kanaya was not paying attention to them anymore, her lookstubs focused on something in the direction the meteor was travelling towards. In the distance there was a sphere with a reddish colour floating in the middle of the blackness.
"What is that?" she asked, signalling the weird sphere floating in the darkness of paradox space.
"That's the dream bubble I was talking about," explained Rose. "Come on, we should be inside before we get there. I'm not sure how the bubble will affect our physical reality."
They agreed and, one by one, stood on the pedestal to be transported inside. Kanaya only had a couple of seconds to observe her surroundings before she was pushed out of the way by Sollux's transportation. Then, she could only see that they were in an area that she did not recognize, a large block with some strange machinery and a pile of soft plushies in a corner, before a red gelatinous surface appeared through the furthest wall and kept moving towards them. Whatever that was, it was able to trespass through walls, floor, furniture and living beings as if it were not tangible at all. Just a moment later, Kanaya felt it go through her, leaving a weird wet sensation behind but not causing any apparent damage to her. Around her she could still see her friends and the two humans, but the block was changing from monotonous grey walls to a floor covered in tall grass and a sky made of a fluorescent pattern that reached as far as the lookstub could see. Examining their surroundings with more detail, Kanaya could see some colourful glass sculptures among the grass, and a huge fishbowl with a castle inside of it far away, almost in the limit of her sight. She checked the sky again and realised that it was made of what looked like fluorescent shells made of glass. Even the air had changed from the stuffiness and charged air of the inside of the meteor to the fresh and salty smell of the ocean.
"This is LODAG," she heard Sollux said, next to him. "The Land of Dew and Glass; Feferi's planet."
She looked around again and realised that she had actually been in this planet once during their game, in one of their team meetings. She had found ironic that a sea dweller's planet had less water that her own. This planet was beautiful in a strange way, but it had been destroyed by Jack Noir a long time ago.
"But Jack destroyed all our planets," commented Terezi, while she gently dropped the carapacian to the floor with Karkat's help. "How is this possible?"
"It's clear to me that this is not really Feferi's planet," deduced Vriska, looking around with fascination. "How did you call this, Lalonde? A dream bubble?"
"Exactly," confirmed her. "This is not the real planet but the memory that somebody has of it."
"Indeed, it's actually my memory," answered a voice from behind them.
Everyone turned around, some of them with their weapons in hand. In front of them stood two trolls that they knew very well: Eridan and Feferi. They were undoubtedly the same trolls they knew, but they were both wearing strange God Tier clothes and their lookstubs were completely white. Their lookstubs looked exactly like Sollux's ghost right one. So, they were ghosts, too.
"Feferi?! Eridan?!" exclaimed Karkat. "But you were dead! Both of you!"
The two ghosts seemed surprised by Karkat's reaction at first but recovered quickly.
"You are Alpha Kar, then," said Eridan. "I'm glad there is still one of you alive, at least."
Karkat turned to him in an angry snarl and signalled at him with his sickle.
"Don't call me Kar! Don't call me anything!" he yelled. "You lost that privilege when you killed Feferi and Kanaya!"
There was clear hurt in Karkat's voice and his lookstubs looked unsurprisingly a bit watery, but the sickle in his hand didn't tremble at all. Sometimes it was hard to remember that Karkat had trained is body more than anybody else to compensate for his short heigh, his non-combative biology and the lack of natural defences. Everyone had underestimated him in the end, because compared to all the other overpowered trolls, he still was one of the weakest of their group. The fact that he was always wearing his big heart in his sleeve and is emotions on his face also contributed to people underrating his prowess in battle. However, Karkat never lacked courage and he was always determined to put himself between any danger and his friends, no matter the cost. In Kanaya's opinion, that mindset deserved far more respect that being hatched with strength or extraordinary powers. She walked towards him and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Karkat, he is not our Eridan," she told him softly. "The Eridan from our session never reached God Tier level, remember? He is an Eridan from a doomed timeline."
Karkat's lookstubs went huge at hearing her, and he turned to look at her before focusing back on Eridan again. The ghost looked ashamed and sad at the revelation of what an alternative version of himself had done.
"For what is worth, I am sorry Kar," he apologised. "Even if it was not me, I can see how that could have happened in other circumstances."
"No, Kanaya is right. It was not you," Answered Karkat, lowing his weapon. "Sorry for accusing you without any reason."
Eridan's ghost nodded but he did not seem happier to hear that. Kanaya wondered what could have been wrong in their timeline that had caused the dead of two God Tiers. As far as Kanaya knew, God Tier players could only die by heroic or deserved causes. Maybe it was better not to know.
"Oh! What had happened to them?!" exclaimed Feferi's ghost when she saw their injured members.
"We are running from a dangerous enemy at the moment," explained Rose, taking a step forward. "They were hurt in our escape. We were hoping you could help us."
Feferi nodded and knelt near Sollux's body. She put a hand on his chest but took it out almost immediately.
"I can't help him anymore, he is already dead," she said with a sad tone. "My powers allow me to heal others, but I can't revive anybody, I'm sorry."
"Hey, don't worry Feferi, it's not your fault," replied Sollux, quickly. "I already knew that I was dead."
Feferi raised her eyes to look at him, possibly stunned to find a ghost with them. Then, she looked back at the body of the dead troll for a moment before turning back to the ghost with a thoughtful expression on her face.
"Are you the original ghost of this body?" she asked while signalling to it.
"Yes, or at least I think so," nodded Sollux.
"Have you people tried to resuscitate him already?" asked then Feferi to the rest of them.
"Sollux died at the beginning of our game and he was already resuscitated once," explained Terezi. "He already used his extra live."
"In our session, our Sollux had two half-ghosts and for that reason we could resuscitate him twice," was the reply from Feferi's ghost.
So, it was true then, Sollux could be resuscitated for a second time. Now that she thought about it, Aradia had also mentioned something about him being alive if he stayed. She looked at Sollux's half ghost and realised that everybody was looking at him. Karkat in particular had a smug look in his face.
"I knew it!" he exclaimed with a huge smile before turning towards Sollux. "I. Told. You. So!"
Then, Karkat began laughing so hard that he had to put a hand on a glass sculpture to keep his balance. It was a weird laugh, maybe a bit hysterical, but Kanaya empathised with what Karkat must be feeling. They had lost so many trolls already that the notion of actually bringing back one of them was an incredible relief. Particularly for Karkat, that had the tendency of condemning himself for everything tragic that had happened to them, and the fact that he had been friends with Sollux for sweeps. Not to mention the pitch tension that Kanaya was still sure existed between them.
"Oh, shut up, KK!" protested Sollux. "Nobody founds you funny!"
"I do," replied Dave with a malicious smile. "I specially find him funny when he is making tantrums about stupid and common things like buckets."
With that, Karkat stopped laughing and began arguing with them. It was quite amusing how Sollux AND Dave insisted on messing with Karkat at each opportunity. Those two were in fact more alike that should be expected of two members of different species. Kanaya ignored the trio bickering behind her and turned back to Feferi.
"Can you please heal the carapacian?" she asked her. "I don't know how long he still has."
"Sure," Nodded Feferi and moved toward the other body. "But I recommend that someone of you revive Sollux soon, if he is still a ghost when you leave this dream bubble he will have to stay. Ghosts can physically enter the bubbles, but they can't leave."
Oh, that was good to know. Especially because they did not know how big the bubble was or how long it would take them to physically pass through it. Looking around it seemed huge, but Kanaya had the suspicion that, like in dreams, space was not a real constant inside these bubbles. Therefore, they had to revive Sollux soon, and to do that, someone had to kiss him.
"So, who is offering to kiss the dead guy?" asked Terezi with a huge smile.
"I am NOT kissing a guy," said Dave immediately. "Sorry, it's not personal, dude, you seem a nice guy. I'm just not like that."
"For Gods' sake, Strider!" protested Karkat. "Are you saying that you can't kiss him because of your stupid 'not a homosexual' human thing?!"
"You know about that?" asked the human, clearly surprised. "Wait, it is not a troll thing, too?"
"Yeah, John explained it to me. We had an extensive debate about the topic," answered the troll. "And no, it is not like that to us, there is no such distinction in troll's culture. Another proof that we are more advanced and intelligent that your pinky monkey-like species."
"Nops, I don't want to know," protested the male human, shaking his head. "The words 'John' and 'homosexual' should never be pronounced near me. I'm allergic to that combination. They are my kryptonite. I will die if I hear them again. You don't want to be responsible for the dead of someone as young and handsome as me, right Karkat?"
Kanaya stopped listening to them, again, and turned to Sollux to offer him an apology. They should really get into it as soon as possible.
"I am sorry Sollux, but I am afraid that if I try to revive you, I would end sucking all the remaining blood in that body instead of kissing it," she justified. "I am still not used to be a rainbow drinker."
"Didn't you do that already?" asked the troll with an amused expression. "I saw the bit marks on its neck, you know."
"Well, I am not kissing a dead body either! And even less this loser's body!" declared Vriska while she was busy releasing Gamzee from his ties.
Kanaya felt the almost incontrollable urge to get out her chainsaw again and finish the clown troll right there and then. She did not know what game was Vriska playing, but releasing Gamzee was a bad idea.
"What the fuck are you doing with Gamzee?!" asked Karkat then. "Don't let him go! Do you want to die?!"
"Relaaaaaax, grumpynubs," replied her. "I have him under control."
She finished releasing the purple-blooded troll, but he did not move from the spot. Then, with a snap, Vriska took out a chair and a drink from her sylladex and sit down on it. With another snap, Gamzee had a huge leaf in his hand and moved next to her chair, providing some shadow. She looked relaxed and indifferent to everything happening behind her. Kanaya did not know why she kept getting surprised about her obnoxious attitude.
"I already know who is going to revive you and it's not me," was Rose's excuse. Kanaya was sure that it was an excuse but she was glad anyway, she did not want to see the human kissing anyone, if possible. "I don't want to risk changing the outcome to one less favourable, sorry."
"Thank you, everyone! I'm so glad to see the efforts all of you are putting into this for my sake!" exclaimed Sollux sarcastically. "Can you do it, Feferi, please? Last time it was our Feferi the one that revived me."
"I am sorry, Sollux, but I am dead already," the ghost girl said, getting up from the floor. "It wouldn't work. Your friend is fine now, by the way."
"Great! Of course it would not work!" protested Sollux. "I am as doomed as ever!"
Kanaya looked around. Discounting the people that had refused to kiss him and Gamzee, for obvious reasons, there were only two more options now. And she knew which one she preferred. She looked at Terezi and somehow the other girl knew it and also understood what she was thinking because her smile turned malicious.
"I kissed Tavros earlier, so I have already accomplished my civil duty for the day!" she exclaimed jovially.
Kanaya smiled. With her refusing to kiss the dead troll, there was only one option left. She looked to Karkat and was pleased when she saw his cheeks turn scarlet. How amusing.
"That is the worst excuse ever, Terezi!" protested Karkat. "I kissed Kanaya before too! I am sorry Kanaya by the way, but I was trying to revive you."
"I appreciate it, Karkat," she replied with a smile.
"I don't care who kisses the dead troll, but I can see the end of the bubble already so hurry up!" yelled Vriska then.
Kanaya turned and realised that she was telling the truth, she could see a red wall that reached the sky in the far distance. It looked to be made of the same strange gelatinous substance that had appeared in the meteor, so she was sure that the other troll was correct in assuming that it was the end of the bubble.
"Yep, I will have to stay as a ghost because nobody wanted to kiss me," complained Sollux's half ghost in a melodramatic tone. "I knew it was going to end like that someday."
"Come on, Karkat, didn't you say that my 'no homo' thing was stupid?" was saying Dave then with a huge smile. "What is your excuse, now? Are you going to let the poor guy die? Again?"
"For fuck sake! Shut up! Both of you!" screamed Karkat.
With that, Karkat trampled towards Sollux's body, got down in one knee, grabbed his shirt, pulled the body up, and kissed its mouth angrily. Both that body and Sollux's ghost began shining in a white light before merging into one body, standing where the ghost had been. Karkat ended alone in the floor while Sollux's ghost become alive again.
"Holly fuck, he really did it!" said Dave in a tone that sounded scandalized and amused at the same time.
"It worked," muttered Sollux. "Oh no, I remember was happened now. The fucker! He really blinded me!"
When Kanaya looked at him, she saw that, indeed, both of his lookstubs were still black and empty. Sollux was also missing some of his teeth still, which explained why he did not seem to have any problems to speak without any lisp. However, there was no more blood on the corner of his lookstubs or his mouth. Even the blood in his clothes had miraculously disappeared.
"I can heal your eyes if you wish so, Sollux," offered Feferi, while approaching him. "I am sorry I couldn't revive you myself."
"Wait, wait, wait!" protested Sollux, suddenly looking scared. "If my lookstubs are healed, will the voices and the headaches come back? Because if that's the case, I prefer to stay blind."
"We don't have time for this! The border is getting close, so hurry up!" warned Vriska, approaching them. "Stop complaining, Sollux! Without your eyes, you don't have your lasers, and it probably affects your psionics too! You are useless to us right now! So, stop being a wiggler and suck it up!"
Kanaya turned her lookstubs to the horizon and realised that, as Vriska had said, the red wall was a bit closer now. It was still quite far away, though.
"Fuck off, you deranged psico!" yelled back Sollux. "It's my body and my decision! If I want to be blind, I have all the right to do so!"
"I actually agree with you on that, but I don't think that being blind is what you really want, Sollux," intervened Terezi. "You have only been blind for a few hours; you don't understand yet what it implies and all the difficulties you will have to get used to. I needed sweeps and my lusus' help to be as proficient as I am now, and you don't have that time."
"I will risk it if it means not hearing those damned voices ever again!" insisted Sollux.
The gold-blooded troll seemed really adamant on it, almost desperate. Kanaya could not really emphasise with him because she had not known that the situation bothered him that much. As far as she knew, Sollux had been able to hear the voices of the soon to be departed since he was a grub, but he had never complained about it with her. However, even though they were friends, they were not really that close. She supposed that it would have been natural for him to not show a weakness like that in front of her.
"So, if you knew for sure that the voices would not come back, would you like your eyes healed?" interrupted Rose.
"Well, yeah," he nodded "If I can have my vision back without the voices and deadly headaches, of course I would do it!"
"We are running out of time here, we have to make a decision!" insisted Vriska. "It would really be faster if I mind-controlled him."
Sollux visibly gritted with tension when he heard her making that suggestion. He had good reasons too, with his past history with Vriska's powers.
"No, Vriska, not fucking mind-controlling!" screamed Karkat, going as far as to put himself between Sollux and her.
"Don't be such a pissygrub, Vantas!" growled her. "It's for his own good! He will thank me later!"
"KK…" growled Sollux, clearly annoyed to be defended.
"NO MIND-CONTROLLING!" yelled Karkat with a furious look and completely ignoring Sollux's complain. He looked ready to fight her if needed.
Vriska looked back at him with an angry expression and letting go a threating growl, originating in the back of her shout sphincter. It was quite an aggressive sound, especially when coming from somebody higher on the hemospectrum. Usually, a growl like that would be enough for a lowblood to back down, but Karkat did not react at all. Instead, he growled back at her with a deeper sound that sounded as threatening as hers. For a moment Kanaya was sure that the situation was going to escalate to a proper fight and she prepared her lipstick again. However, Terezi smacked Vriska's arm and the troll stopped growling. She backed down and throw her arms in the air, complaining loudly.
"Fine! Let your loser boyfriend do whatever he wants! It's not like we need everyone's power to win this game!" she yelled. "I will have to carry all the weight of the final battle too, as usual! That's what I get for trying to help!"
With that, she went back to her chair to pout and finish her drink, ignoring Sollux and Karkat screaming at her that they were NOT dating. Kanaya was actually surprised by the blue-blooded reaction. She checked Terezi for a moment and saw that she was smiling softly while looking at Vriska. Oh, she had not thought of that possibility.
"Terezi, do you think you could See the outcome of Sollux's decision?" asked then Rose, focusing everyone back to the topic. "It's out of my capabilities, but your skills are perfect for it."
Terezi turned to her, surprised for a moment before looking towards Sollux with an unsure expression.
"I don't know, I was never a good Seer," she confessed. "And after needing John to come back in time to fix my mess, I probably should stay out of it."
"Don't be such a pillock, Terezi!" scolded Terezi from her seat. "You did it with me before so you can do it now! Stop being so hesitant! The wall is almost here, we don't have time for doubts!"
Regardless of the rudeness in Vriska's voice, it seemed to be what Terezi needed because she straightened her posture pole and her face's expression transformed into annoyed determination.
"I will do it," she declared.
With that, Terezi raised a hand to Sollux's thinkpan front and a point of teal light appeared on her own. Looking closer, it had the shape of a circle with three protrusions forming a triangle. Kanaya had seen that symbol before. She was not sure, but she believed that it was the sign of the Mind aspect. Kanaya decided it was a good moment to check again the distance to the bubble's external wall, and she was surprised of how quickly it had reached them. Now it was at most at 200 steps from them. She turned back to the others and a moment later, Terezi took a step back.
"Healing your lookstubs or not, the voices will not come back," she said with a grave voice. "But if you don't heal them now, you will die once we reach the new session."
Sollux looked surprised for a moment before turning towards Feferi with a hopeful expression. She was already reaching for him, before he even had to ask. Her hands glowed white in contact with his eyelids for a few seconds and then the external wall of the bubble finally reached them. One moment they were on a huge green field and, on the next, they were again inside the meteor, between grey floors and grey walls and strange machinery everywhere. Kanaya turned back to check on Sollux and saw that his lookstubs were not black anymore, but they were not their usual blue and red colour either. They were yellow with black gander bulbs, exactly the same as the rest of the trolls in the block.
"I can see again, but it's different," said Sollux, looking around with narrowed lookstubs. "The colours are weird."
"Your eyes are yellow, Sollux," said Kanaya
"What? No! They are not!" said the troll before taking out a shining throwing-star from his strife deck and looking at his reflection. "What the fuck? I look so weird!"
"Excellent!" growled Vriska, annoyed. "You took so long in making a stupid easy decision that Feferi could not heal your eyes completely! Now you are still useless!"
"Can you use your psionics, Sollux?" asked Terezi, looking at him anxiously.
Blue and red electricity appeared in Sollux hand, surrounding his throwing-star and it floated a bit in the air before falling to the floor. Reading Sollux's face, it was clear that he had not released them voluntarily. He extended his hand towards the object a second time and it floated a bit again before falling down.
"Fuck!" he yelled. "I haven't had problems with my psionics like this since I was a grub!"
He looked really frustrated, which was understandable. Kanaya herself had found herself in a body a bit different than what she was used to the last time she awoke. It was a frustrating experience.
"Did I fail again?" muttered Terezi, clearly perturbed with that unexpected turn of events.
"Maybe it will get better with time," Kanaya suggested. "You died after overexerting your psionics twice in two hours, and we waited a bit of time before resuscitating you. Maybe you just need time to fully recover."
"At least your psionics are the correct colour now," added Karkat. "And now you don't look as freakish as usual, Captor."
It was clear that even when she and Karkat were trying to encourage him, their words seemed to have the opposite effect. Sollux turned to them angrily and throwed his throwing-star towards the opposite wall with his hand. It did not reach it and fell to the floor, useless.
"What do you know?!" he exclaimed. "My psionics had never been this weakened, they were always on full power or nothing at all! Neither of you have ever had psionics, you could not understand what this feels! Let me the fucking alone!"
And with that he stormed out. Everyone else looked at him leave in an awkward silence for a moment until Vriska let out a short, uncomfortable laughter.
"What a loser!" she said. "Well, we all had a long day, so I suggest we rest for now. Unless is there anything else in our near future that we should worry about, Lalonde?"
"Not that I can see," was her answer.
"Perfect! I will leave the humans to you, then," she told them. "I have to figure out where I can put this clown, somewhere that he can be controlled. We can regroup and plan ahead tomorrow. See you, losers!"
And with that and a gesture, she and Gamzee disappeared around the corner. That left their group reduced to two humans, an unconscious carapacian, and three trolls.
"This is my respiteblock, I guess the Mayor can stay here for now," said Terezi then. "I don't think I have a place suitable for the humans, though."
"They can stay in my sector for today, I have lots of empty space and a lot of pillows that can be used as a sleeping platform," Kanaya offered. "If it is fine with you both, of course. We can figure out better accommodations later, once we all have rested properly."
"It sounds perfect, Kanaya," agreed Rose with a smile. "Thanks."
"Yeah, it's cool," confirmed Dave.
With that, Kanaya began walking, leading the humans out of Terezi's area and toward her private section of the meteor. However, she stopped when she noticed that Karkat had not moved yet.
"Karkat?" she called him.
"We have to do something with the bodies," he said in a sad, tired voice. "Feferi, Nepeta, Equius, and Tavros deserved better. And Eridan's body will stink soon."
"Gamzee took the bodies away," said then Terezi. "I saw them in that weird hallway of terror, each of them in a container like it was a fucking museum."
She looked angry, tired, and sad. Probably all of them did, even the humans. It had been an stressing 24 hours.
"It can wait a few hours, Karkat," Kanaya said in a gentle tone. "We all need rest. We will take care of it tomorrow, together."
Karkat looked at her with the sad expression of someone lost and Kanaya felt a sudden spike of pity for him. She put her arm around his back and gently lead him and the humans outside of Terezi's respiteblock. They walked in silence down all the stairs and hallways leading to the block with thirteen transportalizers, twelve in a circle and one on the centre. Kanaya led Karkat to the transportalizer to his sector and hugged him for a moment. He had not said anything since they had left Terezi's respiteblock, and he looked incredibly tired and sad.
"Go, block your section and get some rest," she ordered him, gently. "I will message you first thing tomorrow when I wake up, okay?"
He looked at her and nodded with his thinkpan, still not saying a word. In an impulse, she put her hands on his cheekblades, and bend down to kiss his thinkpan front. It was quite a pale gesture for her part, but after everything they had gone through, all of them needed a bit of emotional support. He looked at her with hopeful, wishful gander blubs and smiled softly at her. Kanaya felt her pump biscuit made a painful squeeze.
"Good day, Kanaya" he muttered.
And with that, he turned around and disappeared using his transportalizer.
"I never thought I would see the day when Karkat Vantas remained quiet for more than a minute," she heard someone mutter behind her.
For a moment, she felt an uncontrollable urge to defend Karkat and hurt the one that had criticized him. However, she reminded herself that the humans had just arrived and did not know anything that had happened to them. They also lacked cultural context. Their only interaction with her species had been through a screen in a chatlog that could never transmit the complexity of a troll's emotions. She turned back to Rose and Dave, and guided them toward the transportalizer to her area of the meteor with a gesture.
"It had been a hard day for us, Dave," she tried to explain once they were in the principal hall that lead to her respiteblock. "How would you feel if you saw your friends kill each other again and again? How would you behave if, in the deeps of your mind, you felt responsible for their murderous behaviour?"
She stopped for a moment to move a huge, heavy box over the transportalizer, blocking the access from outside. For a moment she was tempted to leave it open in the case that Karkat needed her, but she was very aware that Gamzee was still alive. Maybe Vriska had him on a short leash for now, but she did not trust her enough to leave herself and her guests vulnerable to be killed again.
"What?! But it was not his fault!" complained Dave. "I mean, I have not known him for long, but it's clear that the dude is all bark and no bite. He would never hurt his friends!"
It was nice to hear that from the alien's mouth. She was not surprised that Karkat's big heart and good intentions had managed to be transmitted through the otherwise cold communication system that was trollian. Not even Karkat's constant cursing and bitching was enough to hide his protective emotions. It was clear that for all of his mocking, Dave Strider actually liked Karkat.
"Nobody is saying that he was actually culpable of it, Dave," answered Rose. "I think that what Kanaya is saying is only that he feels that is his fault."
"But it wasn't!" he insisted.
"Tell him that next time you see him, please," asked Kanaya with a tired voice. "He won't believe you, but maybe if it's all of us saying it, he would stop blaming himself for everything. Eventually."
Dave looked surprised at hearing that, but he nodded quickly before he began rambling, using stupid metaphors to express how many times he would tell him that it was not his fault. It was comforting, in a way, even if Kanaya was too tired to make an effort to understand what he meant with all those ridiculous comparisons. His feelings about the topic were clear, at least. Kanaya led them to two empty blocks that were next to hers. They were not exactly respiteblocks, but they would have to work for today.
"You can use these respiteblocks," she told them. "There was no furniture when we came to the meteor and we didn't have time to alchemize anything for long-term accommodation. However, I put all my spare pillows and fabric rolls in several piles there. Feel free to use them as a resting platform if you need it."
"Thanks, Kanaya, we appreciate it," said Rose.
"Yes, thanks," agreed Dave.
"My respiteblock is the next one," she told them while pointing to her door. "Let me know if I can help you with anything. You also have my trollian, so send me a message when you wake up and we will go to find the others."
"Okay, good night!" said Dave before entering the block, leaving her alone with Rose.
"Good night, Kanaya," also said her with a smile.
"Rest well," answered Kanaya.
She then proceeded to enter her respiteblock and throwed herself on the first pile she saw without even taking the time to undress. She was so tired, but her body was jittery, as if she needed to be ready to fight for her life at any moment. She reminded herself that she was safe, Jack could not get to her anymore, nobody could get her in her private section, and nobody inside it would want to hurt her. She was safe, she was fine, she was alive. Her friends were safe too, they were alive and together, everything would be fine. Even though she had lost the matriorb and died she was still alive, and she would figure up something. She would fix it, all of them would. She was not alone. For the first time in days, she relaxed and let her guard down. The moment she did, she felt himself crying and sobbing into her pile.
She felt asleep hours later, with tears still in her face.
ALTERNIAN DICTIONARY: most words are obtained from the troll terminology list in MS Paint Adventures Wiki with additional specifications decided by context on my own.
- Land-dwelling trolls: trolls that lived in land instead of the sea. Contains trolls from all castes except violet and fuchsia blooded trolls (that are aquatic).
- Wiggler: baby troll
- Lusus: alternian animals that acted like parents for the young wigglers.
- Lookstubs: eyes, used mostly by midbloods (highbloods use 'eyes' like the humans)
- Slam poetry: rap in troll culture
- Load gaper: toilet
- GrubTube: troll version of YouTube
- Filial pail: similar to a regular bucket but used in troll sexual reproduction
- Shout sphincter: vocal cords
- Cheekblades: cheekbones
- Block: room
- Respiteblock: bedroom