Is This Love?

Chapter Two

Absent Apology

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"Yeah yeah, I know. But do you know who you were talking too?", Harper asks.

"Uh... a soldier..?"

Harper sighs. "No.. [F/N], that... that was Captain Levi Ackerman."

It takes me a minute but then it clicks. "W-Wait.. The Captain Levi? Like.. the greatest and strongest soldier ever..?"

Harper chuckles. "Yeah, that's the one."

I freeze. "I... I'm so screwed..."

~ *•* ~ *•* ~ *•* ~

[Y/N]'s- POV

I pick up the last piece of glass. I feel a sting in the hand holding the pieces of glass. I can see little drops of blood under one of the glass shards.

"Perfect", I think to myself, "Now I gotta find something to clean up this puddle and my hand..."

"We'll need something to clean up the spilt coffee and tea", Harper says.

She looks down at my handful of glass. "I'll go throw those pieces of glass away along with my handful."

"Uh... no no, I got it."

Harper stands up. "Don't worry about it. You find some towels and I'll throw the glass away. We've drawn enough attention towards us as it is.", she says as she leans over, "Wait a minute. What's that on your hand?"

"It's just glass, Harper.", I say defensively.

"[F/N]?"

"Seriously! It's only glass."

"[Y/N], you're lying to me!", Harper says before she notices the blood, "Oh! You're bleeding!"

"Why are you so freakin' loud?!', I ask as I look around to see if anyone is still staring. I look back at her, "It's nothing."

I feel a poke on my shoulder. I turn to see a soldier with tied up long auburn hair, smooth skin, and goggles on their head.

"Are ya hurt, dear?!, they ask me.

"N-no. I'm not."

"Look, you can't get that past me. I can tell you're lying. My friend over there, Nifa, is coming to clean this spill up. I'll take you to get your hand fixed up.", the soldier says before looking at Harper, "Were you cut too, dear?"

"No no. I'm okay. I'm careful, unlike some other people."

I glare at Harper before the soldier takes the pieces of glass out of my hand.

"Please throw these away for me", the soldier says holding out the pieces of glass to Harper.

Harper takes the pieces of glass. "Of course!"

The soldier looks back at me. "This way. I'll take you to one of the rooms down the hall. There are some first aid supplies in there."

"...O-Okay...", I say begrudgingly as I follow the soldier.

We walk out of the mess hall and down a hallway. There aren't too many decorations. Maybe a painting or two and some flowers, but that's it. I mean, the walls look kinda nice so that makes up for it. But this place still feels a little plain.

"Oh!", the soldier exclaims, "Ya don't even know my name! And I don't know yours either! My name's Hanji Zoe. I'm a squad leader. What's your name?"

"Oh, I'm Cadet- er... Survey Corps scout [Y/N]. It's nice to meet you, Squad Leader Hanji."

"Nice to meet you too, [F/N]. But you can just call me Hanji. We seem to be about the same age anyway."

"O-Oh... okay..."

Hanji takes me into one of the rooms in the hallway. It looks like an infirmary. There are curtains dividing two small beds, an old love seat, and a cabinet filled with different bottles and small boxes.

"Take a seat and I'll get some stuff to clean your hand", Hanji says before opening one of the cabinet doors.

I walk over to the closest bed and hop up onto it.

After a few minutes Hanji walks over to me holding various first aid supplies. She begins to clean by hand.

"So... you've got balls to speak to the Captain that way", Hanji says through a small smirk.

I groan audibly. "I didn't know who he was... I paid no mind to the soldier life until three years ago. And even then, I was so focused on training myself I didn't focus on faces. I mean, I knew who Captain Levi was, but I didn't know what he looked like. I didn't really pay too much attention. Looking back, that was pretty dumb of me. Of course I need to know the higher ups of the section where I'll be fighting..."

"I see..."

"I didn't mean to ramble on. I just know I totally made myself look bad back there."

"You want my advice?", Hanji asks looking up at me.

I shrug. "Sure. It couldn't hurt."

"Don't pay that shorty any mind. He's always that grumpy. Don't worry, I don't think he necessarily hates you. He just has a sharp tongue."

"But... he's the Captain. I have to show respect.", I say slightly confused.

"Yes. Show respect.", Hanji says, "But don't bend down and lick his boot."

Hanji finishes wrapping up my hand. I wriggle my hand to check if anything is loose. Hanji did a pretty good job.

I slide off the bed. "Thanks, Hanji. It's really well done."

"Not a problem. There should be some shirts in the cupboard behind the curtain. You can change in here."

I turn my head towards the curtains then back to Hanji. "Oh. Thanks."

"Well, it was great to meet ya, [F/N]. Maybe we'll be fighting together soon. Just make sure you be careful.", Hanji says, "You remember the way back, right? I have work to do. Moblit's probably looking everywhere for me."

I nod and Hanji opens the door and walks out. I look down at my shirt. It's stained pretty bad. I walk over to the curtains and slide them open. I see the cupboard up against the far wall. I walk over to it and open it. There is a stack of male button down shirts. There are quite a few colors to choose from. I grab the smallest one in the stack. A long sleeved light blue button down shirt. I walk over to the curtains and slide them closed.

I begin unbuttoning my shirt. I notice a dark spot on my white lace bra.

"Ah crap...", I mutter under my breath, "This wasn't cheap."

I lay down my stained shirt and reach for the clean blue one. I hear the door swing open.

"What the h*ll is Erwin's problem? I get a lecture because I spilled a soldier's morning coffee? Bullsh*t..."

"Captain Levi?!", I think to myself, "What's he doing in here?!"

I remain still, trying not to make any sounds, hoping he'd walk out.

The curtains are thrown open and I'm standing face to face with the Captain... in nothing but my pants, shoes, and bra.

"What the h*ll?!", Levi exclaims before turning completely around, "What are you doing in here?"

I reach over and grab the blue shirt to hide my bare chest and torso. "I'm changing my shirt! You spilled coffee on me, remember?! Get out!"

I reach up and slide the curtain shut. I put on the blue shirt as quickly as possible. My heart is pounding so fast and I feel hot. I put my hands up to my face. What is this situation I'm in?! What gods did I anger?!

"Oi."

I'm snapped back to reality and remember the short angry man just on the other side of this curtain.

"Are you done yet? I need another shirt. Because your clumsy *ss spilled tea all over mine."

I rip the curtain open to see the Captain standing in the middle of the room with his arms crossed and his brow furrowed. I'm furious. First the dude crashes into me spilling both of our drinks onto us, then he waltzes in on me changing, and he thinks I'm the problem?! He's the problem!

"Finally", he says sarcastically as he uncrosses his arms and walks forward, "What took so long?"

The Captain walks past me and straight for the cupboard. I don't move at all. My fists are balled up and I'm trying to keep tears from falling. I'm tired, I'm embarrassed, and I'm pissed. Not a good combination.

"Well?", the Captain retorts, "Are you gonna leave or what?"

I slowly turn around to face him. I notice his eyes widen just slightly. Probably because of how I look.

"You...", I say as my eyes fill with tears, "You.. are a terrible person. Sure, maybe that whole thing in the mess hall was excusable."

I can feel a tear fall from each eye nearly simultaneously.

"But you walked in on me changing. I am a woman. The least you could do is apologize! Right, Captain?!"

He doesn't move. He just stands there stunned. I clench my jaw.

"Fine! Whatever! I don't need your apology anyway..."

I wipe my face before turning and walking out of the room.

This sucks. I'm a mess. My feelings are all over the place and I think I've just pissed the Captain off more than he already was. My eyelashes still feel wet. I rub them both with me sleeve. At the same time, I bump into someone.

"M-My bad...", I say as I look up.

"[F/N]?! Are you okay?"

"Harper?", I say as I gaze into her bright blue eyes.

Harper grabs my shoulders. "What happened? Your eyes are red."

"I... He...", I stutter.

"Okay. Come with me."

Harper leads me out into the mess hall. It seems like everyone is cleaning up. Before long Harper and I are standing in front of a scout veteran.

"Excuse me", Harper says, getting the soldier's attention, "[F/N] isn't feeling too good. Can I take her back to our room so she can lay down?"

"Of course", the soldier answers, "The teachings on the scout's routines start tomorrow. She won't be missing much."

"Okay, thank you very much", Harper says before walking with me out of the mess hall and to the dorms.

Harper and I walk down the path a little ways. I feel the puffiness in my eyes and my throat feels dry. I swallow as I try to clear my throat. I managed to choke out a small 'thank you, Harper'.

She smiles down at me. "We're friends right? This is how I show my love to my friend."

"L-Love...", I think to myself, "It's been a while since I've had someone who loved me. The last time I had people like that... They... were taken..."

I look up at Harper. Her eyes sparkle in the sun and her shiny hair bounces with every step. But the brightest thing about her is her smile. That's something I never want to lose.

"I have to keep Harper at arms distance", I think to myself, "I can't lose someone I love. Not again."