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Murdering beauty and passions

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When his senior guard came barreling into the courtyard with a strange girl in tow, Inuyasha was beyond confused. The anger radiating off the man and the fear radiating off the courtier gave him some clues but not many. Given the colors she was wearing, it became blaringly obvious she was a candidate. Maybe she was an imposter and had been found out?

The incredibly vague explanation that somehow this girl knew of his human night made the situation worse. While troubling, Inuyasha had always known it would get out eventually. The more people knew a secret the less it became a secret. Everyone at the palace knew their lord disappeared into his room every new moon. That the guard was always on high alert during that time and the shaman was always present. Hell they even had a priest on staff who had been brutally vetted and who was charged with protecting the gate during those nights just in case some demon decided to charge in. Whomever they picked to be his wife would most definitely find out eventually. Their families would find out. One of the tasks was designed to see whether they could be trusted although, in Inuyasha's opinion, the task the elders designed seemed faulty at best. In a way, he hoped someone did try to assassinate him on those nights. At least that would end this hell.

And then she smiled.

Inuyasha's mind flatlined as his thoughts struggled to catch up. The warmth from his body abandoned him. Even in the summer heat he shivered and trembled. The sun's rays were cold and high noon was as dark to him as any night. Raising a single brow, his disbelief and fragile hope began skyrocketing to the point that, were he wrong, his mind might just shatter.

No one smiled at him like that. Hell no one looked at him like that. Even on an unfamiliar face, that expression was one he'd dreamed about for years. A look that made him feel invincible - a warrior who didn't look for a pointless battle for the thrill of the fight but someone being gifted the strength to defend and a possibly unhealthy urge to kill for who would seek to harm her. There was only one person in the world that looked at him the way this woman was looking at him now. And yeah, her scent was evidence of her fear but...but even though she was scared shitless...

She'd smiled at him. That special smile reserved only for him.

"K-Kagome?"

For a split second, the girl seemed shocked into silence and anxiety wormed its way into his chest. That was a stupid, stupid thing to think. After all, 'Kagome' was obviously that servant girl who…

"How on earth did you figure that out?" the girl finally laughed as she visibly sagged in relief before moving her head to sniff her shoulder, "Is it my scent? Do I smell the same?"

And just like that a watery laugh escaped him as he pulled her into a tight embrace – burying his nose into her hair to memorize this new scent so he'd be able to find it no matter the distance. Honestly, Kagome could look like a cursed old hag with warts and green skin and bright red eyes and he'd still love her. Looks weren't everything and neither was scent truth be told. What mattered was her.

"Your smile," Inuyasha mumbled as he held her tighter still, "You smiled at me."

"What do you mean I smiled at you? I can't be the only person who smiles with they see you," the miko asked skeptically as she tried to pull back but his arms flexed to prevent her from moving.

"Why do you care how I knew it was you? I knew didn't I?" he huffed playfully as he nuzzled her hair, "Stop squirming and just…just let me hold you a second."

"So….you remember?" Kagome asked – her voice somewhat muffled as her face was pushed into his chest. She felt Inuyasha nod as his chest heaved against her. His heart beating heavily against her cheek and his arms trembled slightly.

"Why didn't you come find me sooner?" he asked after a moment, "Hell its been three years Ka…"

"Wait, what? I've only been here a week," Kagome gasped as she pushed back with great effort before her stomach plummeted, "You think you've been here for three years?!"

Inuyasha's arms slackened slightly – his mouth opening and closing like a fish struggling for air.

"A week?" he finally managed before averting his eyes and sitting back. Appearing to think very hard about something, he sighed and nodded like he'd just understood something quite depressing, "So…so you tried to get to me for three hours then."

Inuyasha continued staring dejectedly at the dirt beside them as Kagome's mind was still reeling from this information. Biting her lip and unable to take his silence any longer, her hands quickly cupped his face to force his to look at her – his eyes haunted, face pale. Gently stroking his cheek with her thumb, earning a hollow smile, Kagome tried to think of something comforting to say but came up short. Three years? She could hardly imagine.

"What do you mean hours?" she asked after an embarrassingly long silence and Inuyasha's face fell as he pushed his cheek into one palm.

"The brat...I saw him," Inuyasha mumbled distractedly as he leaned into her touch, "He's dead. A ghost or something. Sword went...went right through him. He told me."

Ignoring the fact that Inuyasha has been desperate or angry enough to try and murder a child, Kagome was more distracted by how broken her half-demon was. This spell had done some major damage. Mentally. Physically he seemed more or less the same but there was something lurking behind his eyes that bothered her immensely.

"Well that explains how he disappeared," Kagome replied quietly and Inuyasha nodded as he turned his head to press his nose into her palm, "Should we try to find him?"

"Later. We can find him later," Inuyasha mumbled as he reluctantly pulled back and got to his feet. Extending his hand, Inuyasha cleared his throat as he waited for Kagome to grasp it, "Come on. We need to talk. In private."

"O-okay."

Really what Inuyasha meant was he wanted someone private so he could hold her. Even now the urge to just curl up and never let her go was almost overwhelming. While it hadn't been long for her, it'd felt like a lifetime to him. A lifetime believing he was dead or crazy. A lifetime where he'd been surrounded by people and never felt more alone. A lifetime in hell. Yesterday he'd been spiraling. Believing that he was going to end up spending the rest of his life in this place while the outside world went on without him. Even if they did manage to get back and only a day had passed there, he wouldn't be able to go back to the person he once was. This place had very nearly broken him. It had broken him in many ways.

"Are you actually sick?" Kagome asked worriedly as Inuyasha took her hand and began leading her towards the largest building. For a moment, he was quiet before answering just loud enough for her to hear.

"Every other month I catch something," he explained as he helped her up a step and walked along the porch towards a hall, "It was like that when I was a child too."

"But you never get sick," Kagome replied barely above a whisper as he turned the corner, "Is there something here that sets you off? Mold or..."

"Mold?" Inuyasha laughed softly as he glanced over his shoulder, "What would that have to do with anything?"

"Sometimes if people are around mold or certain plants too long it makes them sick. Or eating things they shouldn't," Kagome huffed defensively as they turned yet another corner, "Does anything happen around that time or..."

Inuyasha stopped dead causing Kagome to awkwardly bounce off of him.

"Food," he mumbled as he glanced in a seemingly vague direction with a subtle frown, "I hadn't thought of that."

"Hadn't thought of what?" Kagome asked nervously before he gave her a warm smile and shook his head.

"Nothing," he reassured her before continuing to lead her down the various corridors. This place felt impossibly larger the deeper they went -endlessly wandering until finally Inuyasha stopped.

"This is my quarters," he mumbled nervously before sliding open the door, "It's...it's not much but..."

It was so, so hard for Kagome not to roll her eyes as Inuyasha continued muttering about how she could change the furnishings if she wanted. That it wasn't so bad here and that the weather was usually pretty nice in this area so the fact there weren't windows was actually acceptable but that he'd happily arrange for windows if she wanted them. 'Anything you want', he kept repeating. It was almost like he assumed...

Like he assumed they couldn't leave. That this situation was permanent. And just like that she felt nauseous and her heart caught in her throat. The level of guilt he felt was almost palpable as he was his desperate desire to have her stay here or more specifically to stay here with him. As in with him with him. Like as a couple.

Which was odd because since when he want that and maybe she was reading too much into it but...

"Inuyasha, we're not staying here, remember?" Kagome began slowly as she turned to look at him, "This place isn't real."

For a moment he seemed to struggle with himself before closing the door and letting out a long, defeated sounding sigh.

"Kagome you have to know I might be dead," Inuyasha admitted softly, "And then with you being here. In a different body. But..."

"Inuyasha, is that's true then how..."

"I'm in my body. Everyone is in their body...except you," he explained softly as he gave her a sad little smile, "You're not supposed to be here. I am."

Kagome's stomach churned at this even as she shook her head in denial.

"You're not dead," she finally huffed, "This is just a spell or something. A curse."

"Made me with me in mind. Don't tell me you haven't noticed," Inuyasha chuckled darkly, "And it's not so bad. More...more I remembered...things. Thought I was crazy but I'm not crazy."

Kagome nodded slowly as she tried to figure out where he was going with this.

"And I was trying to figure out why you got put in a different body if you are alive," he continued as he slowly turned and leaned against the door, "And its pretty obvious, right? Food. The food here isn't real. You would starve in your normal body so they put your soul in someone else for the time being. Whatever this place is, it didn't know what to do with you."

Kagome blinked once as she tried to follow his logic.

"Anyway, however long it was on the other side, it's been three years here," Inuyasha continued anxiously as amber eyes desperately searched her face, "And your body, your real body, is here. Smells like you. Has your voice. But it's...it's not you. You'd never say things like that..."

"Okay so…so if my body is here…wait, what do you mean I wouldn't say things? I said things. What types of things?"

Kagome's mood quickly shifted from curious to downright furious as she tried to envision what kind of awful things whatever the hell was possessing her body might've said. It probably wouldn't be in good taste but the desire to punch herself in the face was awe inspiring. That was some manipulative evil right there. As if this spell hadn't already hurt him enough they had to bring her into it to finish him off.

"What kinds of things did I say, Inuyasha?" she hissed as she struggled to keep her temper in check and the slightly haunted look in his eyes gave her a rough idea. Probably insulted him or made him believe she thought his heritage made him less worthy in her eyes.

"It wasn't that bad," he protested as a faint blush rose on his cheeks that was completely unrelated to his fever, "Just stung a little is all but I'll get over it."

"What. Did. I. Say?" she insisted and Inuyasha sighed.

"Just that I looked weird," he admitted before backpedaling when he saw Kagome's nostrils flare and her hands curl into fists, "Like I said it really wasn't all that bad. I've been called worse than weird looking. It just…it was clearly not you."

Kagome set her jaw and glared, "But its my body?"

"It looks like it anyway," he amended cautiously, "I think that might be how you can get out. You know merging you back with your body. After all, you aren't supposed to be here."

"But I am here," Kagome pointed out,

"Your soul is here," he corrected before adding desperately, "But I don't care if you look like this forever. Really I don't. You're still you. That's what matters. So...so if you decide to stay..."

Kagome scrambled to find a reasonable way to explain the obvious fact that this was a spell before her thoughts came to a screeching halt.

"I'll still love you. That hasn't changed. It won't change. And if you do want to leave, all I ask is that you wait an hour. A year here. With me."

Inhaling once in pure unbridled shock, Kagome completely forget everything that was happening in favor of focusing on this latest piece of information.

"You love me?"

Inuyasha nodded before insecurity got the better of him when she didn't immediately say it back.

"I mean, if you...if you've never thought of being with me, you know, that way... at least give me a chance. I...I have money here. And power. I can get you whatever you..."

"Hold on," Kagome interrupted and his ears flattened against his head, "What did you mean 'still' love me?"

Turning a sickly pale, Inuyasha's heart plummeted as she still didn't say it back. She didn't even seem like the idea occurred to her. Maybe...maybe he just needed to explain why this news might sound surprising?

"I've loved you for a long time," he tried valiantly, "And yeah, I was confused for a while. I loved you and Kikyo at the same time which isn't great. I know it's not but...but I was confused. And hurt and I didn't...I didn't..."

Quickly deciding he wasn't doing himself any favors, Inuyasha closed his mouth and bit his lip. This wasn't how he hoped his reunion with Kagome would go. He was hoping...

"You're such an idiot," Kagome laughed softly and Inuyasha groaned.

"I'm sure you're right but why?"

"Inuyasha, of course I love you," she continued and the strength in his legs almost gave out under the weight of his relief, "I haven't exactly kept it a secret. I just didn't act on it because I knew you were confused and hurting. I wasn't going to force you to choose because I didn't want to..."

"So...so what will you do?" he asked breathlessly as he gave her a hopeful smile, "Like I said. I might...I might be dead. I might not be able to leave."

Kagome's face softened as she realized convincing him he wasn't dead was going to take actual effort. He made some valid points as well. That didn't mean he was right but she could kinda see why he thought he was dead given everything.

"Inuyasha, I've known since basically forever that if it came between picking my family and picking you, you would win," she admitted earning a nearly inaudible whimper and what suspiciously looked like a tear, "So if you really can't leave, I'll stay. I won't leave you behind."

A heartbreaking smile was her reward as Inuyasha quickly crossed the distance between them and pulled her into a bone crushing hug.

"I'm not crazy, right?" he asked as he buried his nose in her hair, "You're real? Not that I care but...but..."

What Kagome wanted to say was something along the lines of 'are you okay?' or 'what the hell does that mean?' bu decided against pushing him that hard right off the bat. Whatever he'd been dealing with in this illusion had clearly done a number on him. Thinking he was dead or insane meant he'd tried so hard to get out it'd broken something when he hadn't succeeded.

"I'm real," Kagome promised before clearing her throat, "You really don't mind how I look?"

Inuyasha let out a watery laugh as he shook his head - in essence rubbing his nose against her scalp.

"You could be trapped inside Naraku's body for all I care," he teased as he held her tighter, "As long as its you."

Suddenly the whole 'he only cares about me because I look like Kikyo' theory that had been bouncing around her head since pretty much the beginning was thrown out the window. He loved her for her. For whatever reason, she'd been operating under that assumption for so long it felt strange to learn how wrong she'd been. Almost like it changed every aspect of their dynamic.

Well not every aspect.

"They said you've been sick," she changed the subject and he let out a long sigh followed by a somewhat hoarse chuckle that disturbed her.

"That had to be killing you," he hummed bemusedly, "Is that why you asked about the new moon?"

"I thought maybe you being sick was just an excuse for someone's poor timing," she admitted, "But now that I know you are sick, well you know how I am..."

"It's not bad," he admitted as he gave her a tight squeeze before pulling back, "Just a cold."

Inspecting his face, Kagome wrinkled her nose at the sight of him up close. Honestly he looked like he'd been hit with a bout of flu and the heat radiating off of him sent up many red flags.

"I thought half-demons don't get colds like us weak humans," Kagome parroted back something he'd said a thousand times over and Inuyasha looked like he might melt as he mumbled a soft 'do sometimes.'

"J-Just go lay down and let me fuss," she ordered affectionately but Inuyasha didn't move. His face seemed to pale further still as he clearly struggled to comply.

"You can fuss here," he managed weakly as he reached out to grip her hand and Kagome gave him a patient look.

"I am here."

"I just...I mean I don't need to go sit on the futon. You can check me out where I'm standing."

"Well I need to see what you have that I can use and I'll need both hands to do that," she pointed out and Inuyasha let out a shuddering sigh before leading her to a cabinet.

"All the medicine and stuff is in there," he explained as his hand flexed around hers, "Get what you need and then we can go to the futon."

It was becoming very clear that he was struggling with some severe and bizarre form of separation anxiety. There'd be no living with him or, rather, no getting away from him. It was becoming blaring obvious that he had no intention of letting her out of arm's reach. Hopefully...hopefully that would lessen with time.

Wrinkling her nose at that thought, Kagome sighed heavily. They really needed to get him out of here before he officially lost his mind.

"Inuyasha you have to let go of my hand," she instructed gently as she tried to extract her hand but the terror that shone behind his ears stopped her attempts. It was absolutely heartbreaking how afraid he was. Like he honestly thought if he let her go she'd disappear.

"I..." his hand flexed like he was at least trying, "I..."

Okay, so she'd already come to the conclusion that Inuyasha was going to be clingy. Maybe it was because her arrival was still new and her presence here uncertain. Maybe.

"Well help me then," she amended and he nodded gratefully that she didn't push the issue. Convincing him he wasn't dead or insane was going to be much, much harder than she initially thought but at least they were together. That was a step in the right direction.

"Sorry," he mumbled as he grabbed several of the small vials and nodded towards a pitcher, "You'll probably want water, huh? And towels? To bring down the fever?"

Sighing, Kagome nodded as she led him back to the bed and they deposited the items atop it. It was going to be hard to explain without it coming across like she was a witch why Inuyasha never broke contact with her. She could almost hear that guard now accusing her of being a witch or putting him under a spell.

"I love you," Inuyasha mumbled sheepishly as he gave her hand a gentle squeeze, "I just...and I'm sorry but I just...I just need to know you're real."

"It's okay, Inuyasha," Kagome soothed as they awkwardly carried over the pitcher, bowl and some small towels, "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."