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Here in my garden of shadows

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Inuyasha sighed as he rested his chin atop Kagome's hair and wrapped his arms around her waist. Ten years, in here at least, had passed at this point or rather, ten hours in the real world. Sure enough no one had aged during that time. No one truly moved forward. After the first two years in which thousands rioted and some went insane, life had returned to normal. More or less anyway. At least in their corner of the world. After some rather harsh interrogating, the only answer anyone had been given was that however many millions of years ago, here anyway, a demon had cursed them all for refusing to proffer up Inuyasha. Not for the purpose of instating him as Lord. Not for his benefit. It was because of that stupid pearl someone had jammed in his eye at some point. Maybe Mother had done it or maybe it was Totosai or Myoga or anyone honestly. It had always seemed strange how someone could stuff a gateway to the underworld into such a small object but for the goddess of the underworld, it was an easy take to make gateways and portals at her leisure. The description of what happened made it clear who the attacker had been. Sesshomaru's mother was just as cold hearted and ruthless as her son.

Why Sesshomaru had been gifted his sword suddenly made sense. It wasn't to make him understanding - controlling the dead was just his maternal side's specialty. That being said, why that curse had led to Inuyasha being in charge was anyone's guess. Why Kagome's arrival had been so strange never answered. The miko's theory was that the underworld hadn't accounted for her arrival - that her forcible entry broke some rule laid down but that theory was just a theory.

Inuyasha was pretty sure he knew why though. Kagome was the only one who wasn't dead. Not at first at least. If she was still alive, maybe one day she'd get out - simply frozen in time for now. As for him...

As for him, Inuyasha knew he was most likely a member of the dearly departed. It was the only thing that made sense. Why he couldn't leave. Why he'd been in his body since the beginning.

His arms tightened around Kagome's waist as a lump grew in his throat at the thought that one day he'd need to send her away. If the portal ever opened again. Sure, they'd tried and tried but all the efforts in the world didn't make a lick of difference. Nonetheless, if the portal did open, sending Kagome home alone would be the right thing to do. To let her go. She deserved to live a good and long life. Have children and grandchildren and...

"I know why you don't want to try to have a baby," Kagome suddenly whispered, "But...but I just..."

Inuyasha sighed heavily and placed a lingering kiss on her forehead.

"You know why we can't," Inuyasha chided, "We're probably dead Kagome. Even if it is possible, I don't want them trapped here with us. Or worse escape and grow up like I did. Alone. It's honestly a miracle I lived long enough to meet you."

"I'm just saying that it'd be nice," Kagome mumbled as she leaned into him, "I always wanted us to have a baby."

Inuyasha had to set his jaw to keep it from trembling. That would have been nice. Very nice. Amazing even. But dreaming of their life together, as it should have been, was pointless. All it did was hurt.

"Probably a good thing that we're here then," Inuyasha lied - his voice hoarse and face taut, "I never wanted brats. Still don't."

Kagome let out a shuddering sigh and nodded.

"I probably knew that," she admitted sadly as her fingertips trailed up his arm, "And you're right. Just...just being stupid I..."

Inhaling sharply, Kagome suddenly tensed and her heart began to race.

"What's wrong?" he breathed anxiously as Kagome began scrambling to her feet, "I'm sorry. I...I didn't mean...""

"That's not what's wrong," Kagome murmured dismissively as she stared towards the forest, "A jewel shard. I feel a jewel shard."

"You sure?" Inuyasha asked breathlessly as amber eyes widened and he scrambled to his feet, "Here?"

When Kagome nodded, Inuyasha wasted money time flinging her onto his back just as a pink beacon sudden burst into the sky. A solid beam so powerful the wind rustled around them.

The wind also carried a familiar scent.

"I smell Miroku," Inuyasha breathed as he pushed himself to go faster, "And Sango too."

"You don't think they got trapped here too, do you?"

"I sure as hell hope not."

That concern seemed unfounded, however, as the pair came closer to the fortress itself and saw dozens – if not hundreds – of individuals scrambling towards the light with almost tangible desperation. At one point, Inuyasha even had to use his superhuman strength to leap atop buildings to get around the masses all congregating around the well house where the little boy and his mother were patiently waiting.

"I contacted your friends," the boy offered with a hopeful smile as the pair landed in front of him, "They came looking for you after they found your backpack by the campsite. The monk put a sutra with a pink crystal in the middle of the garden. It did something."

Kagome nodded as she took Inuyasha's hand and rushed forward without a second thought – passing through an almost jellylike substance before popping out the other side….

Without Inuyasha.

Much to her horror, his hand vanished the instant she crossed through and as she whirled on the spot, she came face to face with the man himself – looking on the verge of tears as he offered her a very strange and resigned smile.

"Its okay," he mumbled – voice warped by the barrier that was growing smaller with each passing moment, "Go."

"I'm not leaving you," Kagome screamed as she fruitlessly tried to force her way back as the slayer and monk watched out with heartbroken eyes, "I'm not doing that."

The world behind Inuyasha's form seemed to be moving at lightspeed – the sun setting and rising as the wall slowly closed in around him. Watery amber eyes remained fixated on her face – like he was trying to memorize every detail.

"Its okay," he finally mumbled again as he began to fade from view, "It'll be okay."

"The hell it will!" Kagome hissed as her aura pulsed angrily as she scraped against the unyielding goop with such ferocity her fingertips began to bleed, "I'm not leaving you there. I'm not!"

"Stop!" Inuyasha ordered hoarsely as he watched blood being smeared across the barrier, "Kagome stop! Sto…"

And then he was gone and a partial old grimy wall stood in his stead.

On the other side of the wall, Inuyasha let out a shuddering sigh as exhaustion and despair crashed down on him. The little boy and his mother had remained by his side as the crowds had slowly dispersed. Once it was clear that no one would be escaping, they'd left. A week had passed by in what the half-demon was sure was only a few minutes for her and yet Inuyasha refused to miss one second of being in Kagome's presence.

Crumpling to his knees, Inuyasha stared blankly ahead as he tried to accept his fate with dignity and poise. To be happy that Kagome, at least, was free to live her life and move forward. Her happiness and safety was more important than his own. On the other side of the barrier, on the other side of the well, she had people who loved her and needed her. They deserved to spend more time with that woman. Everyone deserved to be blessed with her love and her kindness. She obviously wanted children and he couldn't give her that. A dead person couldn't give her that and he had been right all that time. She was still alive. She could leave while he couldn't. His soul in the underworld to stay for all of eternity. It…it would be selfish to keep her here. To damn her to this existence.

Selfish...

And he got ten years with her. Basking in her love. That was…that was enough. It would be okay. He'd be strong and persevere. Worse things had happened to the woman he loved than being separated from them. It could've been worse. So much worse. Kagome could've died but instead not only was she alive but safe.

Why wasn't that enough? He'd already resigned himself, hadn't he? Spent years trying to psyche himself up for this exact moment. Closing his eyes, Inuyasha tried to find the strength to move as a solitary tear streamed down his face. It was going to be alright. Miroku and Sango were there. They'd patch her up and comfort her. Protect her. As for him, he just needed to stay in this spot for a little while longer. While her scent was still fresh, it had faded steadily over the last several days. Little by little but it was still there.

Another tear fell as Inuyasha felt his mind crack with an almost audible snap. The floor spinning out from under him as the air grew thin and it became a struggle to remember how to breathe.

Kagome was gone. He'd have to go back to their home. Alone. Sleep in an empty bed. Alone. Wake up every morning. Alone.

For all of eternity.

Panic began clouding his mind as the full ramifications of what had just happened crashed down on him. But to the outside observer, he seemed to be handling this rather well. A few tears and quiet acceptance. Inside, though, was a hurricane ripping his sanity to shreds.

"I'm so sorry," the mother whispered sympathetically, "We thought…we thought you both would be able to go through."

"Its fine," Inuyasha mumbled as he reached up to wipe away the tear about to drip off his cheek and a somewhat crazed laugh bubbled out of his lips, "It's fine. It is. It's..."

A sudden tug on his hand startled him as amber eyes flew open to stare down at what was pulling on him. A red string? His unencumbered hand lifted and dropped the string a few times before raising the tied hand to sniff it. His eyes opened in alarm. It smelled like blood. Kagome's blood to be more specific.

"Oh shit," Inuyasha breathed as he remained stock still. Had he done this – if only by accident? His half-crazed mind trying to claw her back from the land of the living. Had he tethered her with his desire to keep her by his side or…

As much as it terrified him to be alone, he honestly didn't want her to be stuck with him here in this place. He might be a selfish bastard but...but he wouldn't be able to live with himself if...

A surprisingly forceful tug had him being thrown into the garden wall with an audible thud.

"What the hell?" Inuyasha breathed in panic as he tried to pull his painfully smushed head away from the stone, "Why…"

A muffled curse in a familiar voice almost stopped his heart before whatever or, rather, whomever was tugging him began pulling so hard it almost dislocated his finger.

"Al…ere," the voice grunted before it huffed, "..lp…e…"

The force of the tug was quickly becoming painful and Inuyasha tried to quell the hope and fear blooming in his heart. How was this even happening? How…

"Shit," Inuyasha gasped as the wall seemed to vanish and he toppled forward to land squarely atop Kagome's manically laughing form.

"Told you I'd find you," Kagome giggled breathlessly as she squeezed him to her, "I wasn't going to let you stay there without me."

Inuyasha was breathing heavily as his mind reeled. Was this real or had this latest loss driven him crazy? Was he not dead or had Kagome just pulled back his soul? But then...what was happening?! Was he alive?

Pressing two fingers against his neck, Inuyasha let out a watery laugh when he felt his heart racing beneath his fingertips. He was alive? But how was that possible? Had he not been dead?! Then why did Kagome...

Oh screw trying to figure it out! He was alive dammit which meant he still had a wife and a life to live at her side!

"That was not a flattering look on you, my friend," Miroku teased, "In the future, when do you get trapped behind a barrier, please do so in a way that is easier on the eyes."

Kagome's laughter only increased at the strange observation before she cupped the half-demons face and pulled him down for a rather passionate kiss which he quickly melted into. This was real. His arms curled around her as he adjusted his body so his hips cradled hers. This was real. He was free. Angling his head to take control of their lips meeting, Inuyasha ignored the squeak that escaped Sango. This was real.

"My my what a development," Miroku teased, "Pray tell. What were you two doing behind the barrier? A few hours locked together seems to have done both of you some good. Sango, perhaps we should try the same…"

A solid whack killed that statement before he could finish it.

"Pervert," Sango mumbled before clearing her throat and awkwardly trying to put an end to this awkwardness, "Although we, um, should get going."

Inuyasha let out a contended breath as he reluctantly pulled back and nuzzled Kagome's nose.

"I told you I wouldn't leave you," Kagome hummed happily as she brushed a few hairs away from his face. Inuyasha only grinned.

On the other side of the garden wall, a mother and son stood hand in hand with almost matching sorrowful expressions.

"You need to leave too," the mother mumbled as she squeezed her son's hand, "And not come back. You deserve more than what I have inflicted on you. A chance to live as normally as you can."

"What about you?" Ena asked quietly as he glanced over his shoulder.

"I accept my punishment," his mother hummed, "If you can leave, you deserve to be free from this place. Not many get a second chance at life."

"I guess I should thank you for murdering me then," the boy joked weakly, "Otherwise I'd be trapped here like everyone else."

"Don't say such things," the mother corrected sadly before kneeling down and holding his chin in her hand, "You have always been such a good boy Ena. My gift from god and I did not appreciate you as I should have. I only hope that...that you will have a second chance. Perhaps...perhaps even the impossible may happen and you'll get to grow old. Be happy. That is my wish for you."

Letting out a steadying breath, the boy nodded in understanding as he hugged his mother before turning towards the garden wall to leave this place once and for all.