Well, at this point I'm not even sure if I have to specify where my one review came from, so let's just see what he said.

Oh, there you guys actually acknowledge the existence of April Fools' Day? Sounds convenient. Here, let's just say that orthodiethylbenzenedianion is a cool word.

I'm pretty sure it's a global (at least global in terms of the entire westernized world) event, kinda like Christmas or opposite day.

I'm sure most of the components of air can be solidified, and punching through thirty centimeters of solid air would be a feat worthy of Saitama.

Yeah, small mistake I made when I slightly reworded it from some of the dialogue I heard in a YTP of The Matrix.

I can already see [Chris' story "the very hungry Hitler"] being made into a Der Untergang parody.

Yeah, someone should make that.

An easy work around to this is marking the upper side of the plastic grip part of the USB with hot glue or something so that you get it right on the first time, but if it isn't possible, yeah.

From Schrödinger's cat to Connor's USB, quantum mechanics never changes.

How the fuck did you think of that?! How the fuck didn't I think of that?!

Anyways, thanks for updating quicker than I thought you would-

That's the second time I'd say you've spoken a bit too soon. lol.

-and this was certainly a fun little chapter.

It would be better if every chapter ended with "As always, thanks for reading.", though.

Nah, I prefer doing it this way because it makes cliffhangers feel more cliffhanger-ey.

Also, small shout-out to Saira-Blue for favoriting 私は、キラ/ I, Kira. One last thing, AV has started his own DN FanFiction, Quickstart, which is very loosely inspired by this. He mentioned I, Kira in it so I figured I might as well return the favor, and it actually does look to become a rather exciting story, which is a pretty rare thing outside of pro-L propaganda.

Alright, without any further rambling, let's continue.

(Luci's POV)

'All right, that should just about sum it up.'

'Sum up what, mate? We just sat around and shuffled papers while you watched!'

'A very productive day indeed.' I hear the door opening behind me, which must mean Q's back with another plate of… wait, then why do his footsteps sound so swift and hurried?

'Luci!'

'What is it?'

'Tomorrow's Today Tonight, quick… It's about Kira, you have to see this!' He exclaims with a worried look on his face and a hint of desperation in his tone as he grabs the remote.

*BEEP*

As usual the three main hosts of TTT are present, the man in the middle doing the talking.

'Just one chapter ago our program director received four videos from someone claiming to be a "new" Kira, with instructions to broadcast a live message through our network. If we do not do so, they will kill our entire board of directors.'

(Chris' POV)

A new Kira?! What's going on here?!

'On April 3,' the reporter continues, 'an envelope closely resembling one of Kira's arrived at this station. It was clearly sent by someone with Kira's powers, however it appears to be someone other than the individual himself. The first video announced the time and date for two criminals who were arrested the other day. Exactly as predicted, these two men died the day after the videos were received, at 2PM of heart attacks. Who besides someone with Kira's powers is capable of performing such a demonstration? From this fact, among others, we've concluded that the sender of these videos does in fact have this power.'

If this is really true, they're right. Nobody without a Death Note could do that…

'The envelope we received had instructions telling us to air this, the second video, at exactly 5:59PM today. We have not viewed this video ourselves, but the instructions state that it foretells yet another death, and contains a message directed at Kira, L, and people all over the world. The time is now 5:59PM. You are now going to see the video.'

The image on the screen changes to the word "KIRA" in a familiar white font over a black background, just like the style I use, or an inverse of the style L uses.

There are several seconds of pure and total silence, before a heavily distorted yet very clear voice announces:

'Attention, people of the world! I am a new Kira.'

By now I can tell that the "video" is just a computer-generated image with an added filter-masked voice overlay. In other words, no actual cameras were used to record it. Clever thinking.

'If this video is being aired when I specified, then the time now is 5:59PM, and the sun is down for no particular reason even though it was up just a few seconds ago in the previous scene. Please change the channel to TTT's secondary one, where a news anchor there will die of a heart attack at precisely 6PM.' Before I can react Rugo changes the channel for me, and, sure enough, the reporter collapses in his chair, and his head flops limply to the side. But, wait a minute…

'So this person is trying to point out that I'm not evil, by killing someone live on TV? That's like… It's like the time NASA spent $3.2 million to determine that they don't have enough money! Rugo, change the channel back!'

*BEEP*

'But one demonstration alone does not serve as absolute proof, so I will present you with another…' I don't need to see someone else die to know that this is the real deal. I turn the volume down a bit and turn to Rugo, but my thoughts are interrupted as I see an expression of shock in his face, which wasn't there half a minute ago.

'Umm, Rugo? You okay?'

'D…DIMINA! Look Chris, I know you can't see what I'm seeing so can you, like…' he snatches a blank sheet of paper form my desk along with a pencil before continuing, 'I'll draw what I'm seeing.'

A minute later a peek over his shoulder and see what he's drawn so far, and it looks like the video isn't just an image after all, but (presumably green-screened) in front of it is a very human-like Shinigami, with the appearance of a young girl with white wings and red hair. More importantly, she's holding open what must be a Death Note in front of the camera, with the following written in it:

Rugo,

In this message I will reveal as little as possible relating to the second Kira's identity, so if L and his gang ever gain the ability to see me she won't be exposed if they look back at this video. In any case, the only way I can deliver this message with no-one else seeing is by writing it in my Death Note, so if I did name her here she'd die anyway.

I remember my sister once said that I'm that kind of person who between two choices always picks the wrong one, and I'm sure she would've done everything in her power to keep me in the relative safety of the Shinigami realm. But regardless of what happens here, I think I'd have to disagree with her this time. If we only focus on making the best moves, we will never get the better of our opponent. When necessary, we must be willing to take big risks, and be prepared to lose everything. Unless we change how we fight, we cannot win, and while our opponent has taken a very different form this time, that basic concept still applies.

Now, I'm not going to lie, there's a good chance that a few people are going to die this evening. While my human and I will do our best to minimize collateral damage… if you think it's natural for people to sacrifice their own lives to save others, surely you can understand that, sometimes, a single death or two can save many lives. Of course, you already know that. Speaking of which, and this'll probably be one of the last times I say this, you shouldn't feel bad about what happened last time. You fought to protect your world, we both did, and in the end we won. Isn't that good enough?

Now, about this "Second Kira". Despite my best efforts she still refuses to take the offer for the Shinigami eyes, however she's still highly enthusiastic about being on "Team Kira". I believe she and Kira will get along well, provided that they don't kill each other…

(Luci's POV)

Changing the channel again, I see another news anchor being lifelessly held by a co-worker.

'…They said Kira, or whoever this is, would be sending a message to people all over the world. We have to make them stop this broadcast or something terrible is going to happen!' At that order the others all grab their phones and attempt to contact the network, as I continue to watch the broadcast.

The distorted voice continues, 'I trust you now know that I really am just as powerful as Kira'. Well they're certainly correct there.

'It's hopeless,' I hear Aivenawa groan in annoyance, 'every single number I've tried in the entire station's busy…'

'My friend who works there has his phone turned off!' Chief Blackheart adds.

'And I forgot how to call 911!'

'Shut up Okada! …Dammit! Clovis, Red, Maes, Marco, you four need to go over there to make them stop, like you did with Kira's first broadcast!' One of the four obediently slams open the door and they all rush out of the room and down the hallway, and less than half a minute later I hear one of the police cars leaving the hotel.

'Please, listen to me carefully, and don't misinterpret what I say.' My attention snaps back to the TV. 'As I speak, this world is rotten! Evil is festering and none among us will take a stand against it! That is, except for Kira and myself. I do not want to kill innocent people. Like Kira I hate evil and love justice, and like him I do not consider the police as my enemies, but rather as potential future allies in my fight against evil.'

Even the voice is disguised. Damn you, whoever you are…

'We must join forces, Kira, and eliminate the darkness from this world. But please understand, I will not merely be used as a pawn in your game. Either you will see me as an equal, or I suppose you'll just have to kill me to keep my mouth shut. And to everyone else I must make it clear that if no-one tries to capture me, no innocent people will die. And even if you do not agree with Kira or I, if you refrain from publicizing your views in the media or in public, you will be spared.'

My listening is interrupted as Q comes back in holding an extra TV set, and Pearl, Aivenawa, Moorga and Chief Blackheart set it up as fast as possible, setting it to a live news broadcast reporting from in front of the station.

'…And then, simply wait. In a short time, the world will be changed for the better. I'm sure you will all agree. We can do it. We can change the world and make it a place inhabited only by good, kind-hearted people.'

'Hey… where did Mungalo go?'

'SHUT UP OKADA!'

(Dimina's POV)

'This is Lauren to Dimina, can you hear me?' *CHZZT*

'Loud and clear, Lauren.' *CHZZT*

'Dimina, I've got visual on a police vehicle approaching the TTT station, from the north.' *CHZZT*

'…I see it. Any ideas?' *CHZZT*

'We obviously can't let them disrupt the broadcast, so…'

'But you don't know their names and you don't have the eyes.' *CHZZT*

'But you do.' *CHZZT*

'Are you suggesting I do it for you?' *CHZZT*

'Well, as a certain ancient military strategist once wrote: Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak.' *CHZZT*

'Oh, right, because that way L and the Task Force are going to think you have the eyes when you really don't, and since Rugo can see me… wait, I just have one question.' *CHZZT*

'Go ahead.' *CHZZT*

'I probably should've asked this earlier but WHY ARE WE USING WALKIE-TALKIES WHEN WE'RE IN THE SAME FUCKING ROOM?!'

Turning to me she replies, 'You know, that's actually a good question. Come to think of it, even if we were in adjacent rooms we could just communicate verbally since this entire office building is empty.'

'Well, there's no time to dwell on that now, the police car is in range and if I had to guess I'd say we have about twenty to fourty seconds before they pull up at the doors of the station. So, I'll just go down there and wait for you to give the word, right?'

'Yes…'

At that I crawl out the window, push myself off the outer wall and fall down into a slow glide. It feels a little unusual to take orders from a human, but if it gets me to Rugo I'm fine with it, and in any case it's the least I can do for Lauren. She hates having nobody to talk about this with, and it seems to sit forever on her tongue and in the forefront of her mind. I suppose having me around makes things easier for her. But in the privacy of her own room she raves and giggles over her own plans, while I listen and occasionally help out where I can.

I land on the police vehicle and peek my head through the roof, memorizing their names before they come to a stop in front of the station's glass doors and jump out. After seeing that it's locked they begin pounding on the door in an attempt to get the guard's attention.

'This is the police! Open up!'

'Let us in, douchebags!'

It seems the glass door is soundproof as well. Either that or he's deliberately ignoring them, which wouldn't surprise me.

'Oh, okay, so that's how you wanna be?' One of the officers draws his gun and-

'DIMINA! I CHOOSE YOU!'

DIMINA used Death Note!

It's super effective!

MARCO, MAES, RED AND CLOVIS fainted! (and died)

Well, that was anticlimactic. As the four fall to the ground and collapse I can faintly hear the last words of one of them…

'I… barely had… any… lines…'

(Luci's POV)

'Just imagine it, a world protected by the police, Kira and myself… a world with no place for evil-'

I turn down the volume to focus on the second TV's live broadcast. Those four I sent over should've reached the building by now, meanwhile Q has gone back to typing, Pearl is watching everything next to me and the others are fervently trying to get through to TTT.

'We urge all our viewers to please stay calm regarding the broadcast currently being aired on Tomorrow's Today Tonight. Details will be reported as soon as they are available… we're now broadcasting live in front of the station… This just in! Four people are reported to have collapsed in front of the building! We are reporting live from mere meters away. For safety reasons I cannot stand in front of the camera, but what you are seeing here is live coverage!'

I hear a few gasps from across the room, everyone now either staring carefully at the four bodies shown on the floor in front of the building, or trying to look away.

'…MARCO! MAES! CLOVIS! RED! Oh my god…'

'There's no time for us to distract ourselves, Chief! Whoever did this, they must be in or near the TTT building. Now, it was mentioned at the beginning that they received the videos and instructions on April 3, which was over a month ago. That certainly gives a lot of preparation time for-'

'Paramedics have just arrived on the scene. We urge our viewers to stay away from the headquarters of Tomorrow's Today Tonight. It is dangerous to approach the area. It is eerily quiet now…'

'So how do we get into that building without-'

'Shut up Okada! So how do we get into that building without being seen?'

…

…

'Are the police ready to work with us in creating a just world?' The new Kira continues, and I turn to the screen again. 'Their answer to this question will be answered tomorrow at the top of the six o'clock nightly news. Starting at 6:10PM on that day, Tomorrow's Today Tonight will air one of two videos – one if the police say "yes" to my proposal, and the other if they say "no". If it is an official police announcement, no spokesperson has to appear on the screen.'

My attention is caught again by the TV set to the left, where some kind of vehicle drives straight over the four bodies and two of the paramedics and plows through the doors into the building, an event which is quickly narrated by the off-screen reporter.

'What… the hell?!' The Chief comments.

'Well that's certainly one way to do it without anyone seeing your face. But if this "Kira" got the other four, there's a good chance that he or she is inside. If their location is anywhere in the lobby, this could be really risky.'

(Mungalo's POV)

As a great man once said, if you want to do something right you have to run over six people to do it.

Stepping out of the old police car I see a guard standing there with a dazed look on his face as he pulls out… a knife? Well I guess TTT has never had the need to consider armed guards before, so they must be improvising.

'Hey what the fuck man you can't just drive in here. Seriously, this is a no-parking zone!' He rants as I approach him, before he threateningly points the knife out at me. 'I am authorized by the new Kira to use force if necessary in order to prevent-'

'What, with that? Heh, that's not a knife…' I respond, reaching into my back pocket, 'THIS is a knife!'

'Holy shit, where did you-'

'Where's the studio airing the Kira video?'

'Uh, the seventh floor, studio G-6. The lift is broken so you'll have to use the stairs.'

(One minute later)

*KNOCK KNOCK*

'Who's there?!'

Bursting through the door I enter the dimly-lit room, 'This is the police! Stop this broadcast!'

A rather short and heavy-set man with black hair, glasses, a customized jacket and all the aura of a rabies-filled wombat turns around. 'Who are you?'

'I just told you! This is the police! Now stop this broadcast immediately!'

'Just wait a minute, officer. If we stop this video now, we'll all be killed.'

'I don't want to hear your excuses! Four of my co-workers are dead!'

'Director Bills, the video just finished…' I hear from one of his subordinates at one of the screens, which certainly explains one thing.

'…So it's you, is it? You're the Duncan Bills who's been playing up the Kira case for all it's worth. Putting out all those "specials" in spite of all the warnings we issued? You think the whole thing's very funny, do ya?!'

'I… I had no idea it would turn into something like this, I swear. Go easy on me, sir.'

'That director they said this Kira addressed the package to, that was you too, wasn't it?'

'Yes. It was.'

'Give me those tapes, the whole package, exactly as you received it!'

'Even if I wanted to, we were instructed to incinerate the whole thing once we had made copies of it!'

'THEN GIVE ME ALL THE FUCKING COPIES!'

'But like I said earlier, if I do that, we'll all be killed.'

'This is the direct result of you putting out all those shows and treating Kira like some kind of star. I'd say you're reaping what you sowed. If, after watching the tapes, the Task Force decide its okay to air them, they'll be returned to you.'

'…All right, all right. I'll get them, just do me a favor and stop waving that massive knife around!'

(Luci's POV)

'The police have made no statement regarding this incident as of yet… what's this? A police car has finally arrived on the scene. It's just a single patrol vehicle, though.'

'We aren't alone in this,' the Chief concludes, 'there are other cops who are ready to stand up and fight Kira…'

'Yes, so it seems. When you think about it, the Task Force are just one small section of the Australian police. And it's even smaller now that we have only eight people instead of twelve. Chief, you know the deputy chief's phone number, don't you.'

'Uh, yeah.'

'Call him. If he picks up, hand the phone to me. I technically have more authority in this case so it's better if I do the talking.'

As he pulls out his phone and dials a number, I switch the channel on the TV that was broadcasting the new Kira's message just a minute ago, as it seems to have stopped. Whoever took the Soichiro Yagami approach to entering the building must've ended it, either that or it finished as planned when I wasn't paying attention. That reminds me, when should I discuss the whole "Death Note" thing with the Task Force in detail? Probably sometime later.

As the Chief hands me the phone I can faintly hear the deputy's ringtone through it.

'BEEP BEEP IMMA SH- *BIP* …Nigel, I told you not to call me when-'

'This is L. I have a request. There will be more officers driven to act on their own after seeing this broadcast. Unless strictly coordinated action is taken, we could have a major fuckup on our hands.'

(Dimina's POV)

After several seconds of loudening footsteps from behind me I hear, 'Good news, all last-minute checks on the escape vehicle have showed nothing unexpected. Anything happen while I was down there?'

'Yeah, another cop car is just pulling up now. What do you want me to do about them?'

'Well, the broadcast's over, so there's no reason to kill them.'

'Well I should at least do something. After all, fighting's no problem at all when there are no witnesses.'

'Dimina, you've had enough fun for today, okay?' She complains, beginning to pack away the binoculars and walkie-talkies into her bag.

'Yeah, you're right. I'm not going to fight them… except I am!'

'Dimina! …Dimina Corabelle, get back here this instant!'

DIMINA used ROUNDHOUSE KICK!

It's super effective!

UNNAMED POLICE OFFICERS fainted!

Soaring back up out of there I subtly giggle at the priceless look on Lauren's face.

'…What the fuck?!'

'Don't worry, they're still alive, I made sure of it, they're just a little temporarily unconscious. Plus, no-one else would've seen that since I'm invisible, remember? So there's nothing to worry about.'

(Luci's POV)

This other channel's reporters sure are awful.

'Oh fuck! Pig's down! Pig's turned to bacon!'

'Shit bro! Fuck it! Book it! Ah, yo, skedaddle!'

Focusing back on the Deputy Chief on the phone I hear:

'…All right, L. You tell me how to coordinate this.'

(Twelve seconds later)

'Yes… that's right. They should never show their faces…'

Out the corner of my eye I see Q enter with his phone in his hand.

'Luci, its Munaglo!'

'…Yes, thank you, Deputy Chief. Look, something's just come up, I'll call you back in five seconds, okay? Okay.'

*BIP*

'… I'll put it on speaker.'

*BIP*

'This is Mungalo, get me Luci!'

'Hold on for a moment.'

I lower Q's phone and re-raise the Chief's.

*BIP*

'Deputy Chief, the one in the police vehicle was Mungalo.'

'Tell him that we'll be there in ten minutes.'

[BIP INTENSIFIES]

'I need to speak with Luci' Mungalo mutters.

'I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. If you would like to speak to a representative, say "agent". If you'd like to travel through your problems with Microsoft tech support, press 2.'

'I fucking hate Microsoft!'

'Calm down Mungalo, I'm just kidding.'

'Luci, that's you? I got the videos, but you need to send some help, I gotta get the bloody 'ell outta here!'

'We're sending police officers.'

'How many?'

'All of them.'