A/N: This is my first entry for "Inspired by OQ" Week. This one is inspired by EvillyQueenie's (QueenieAppleby on tumblr) comic "Greenie's Greatest Prank," where Greenie (Zelena) turns Robbie into a merman. You can find a link to it on my Twitter or my tumblr.
"Under the Sea"
Regina turned off her car. She climbed out of it, slamming the door before marching up to the farmhouse door. Fueled by anger and concern, she banged on it until it opened to reveal her sister. "Where are they?" she asked.
"Hello, Regina, I'm well, thanks for asking," Zelena said snidely, crossing her arms. "What are you doing here?"
"You know damn well why I'm here," Regina snarled. "Robin and Margot were due back home an hour ago."
"And how the hell should I know where they are?" her sister asked, glaring at her.
Regina clenched her fists to keep from ripping out her sister's red hair lock by lock. She gritted her teeth as she answered: "They came here for your visit with Margot. Did they show up?"
"Yes," Zelena replied. "And they left. Maybe Forest Hobo decided to go to the forest, though I wish he wouldn't take Margot there. I don't need her smelling like pine and dead leaves."
Something seemed off with her sister. Though she was sneering and trying to look like she didn't care, she seemed more nervous than angry. Regina narrowed her eyes, noticing that Zelena kept glancing behind her and had angled her body so Regina couldn't look into the house. She was hiding something.
"Robin wouldn't just go off without telling me where he was going, especially with any of our children," she said, trying to keep her voice calm.
"Have you tried calling him on the phone thingy?" her sister asked.
Regina breathed in through her nose and out her mouth to calm down. "Yes, of course. It rang a few times and then went straight to voicemail."
"Well, I don't know how that man thinks," Zelena said, shrugging. "He's your soulmate. You track him."
That statement made Regina smirk as she held up her phone. "I have. There's an app for that. Robin, Henry and I all have the app so we can keep tabs on each other."
Her eyes widened and though her stance didn't change, Regina could tell her sister was getting even more nervous and defensive. "Oh?"
"The app is tell me Robin's phone is still here," Regina said, pushing a button. Horns sounding for a fox hunt echoed from inside the house—Robin's ringtone, chosen just because it was called "Sherwood."
Glaring at her sister, Regina pushed past her into the house. She continued into the kitchen as Zelena tried to stop her. Regina spotted Robin's phone vibrating on the table as it rang, a picture of her filling the screen as her name ran across it.
"Oh," Zelena replied, trying to sound surprised. "Robin must've left that behind."
A soft coo drew Regina to the wooden crib always set up in the kitchen. She looked down to find Margot lying there with her favorite ducky blanket covering her. Her blue eyes were open and she smiled, kicking and reaching for Regina when she saw her. A cold sensation swept through Regina as she gaped at her sister. "And he forgot Margot too?"
"He said I could keep her for a bit longer," Zelena lied, looking ready to do something even stupider than what she no doubt had already done.
Regina picked up Margot, holding her close. "Where is he?"
Zelena shrugged. "He just left. Maybe he got tired of holding your purse."
"I don't have time for your games. You couldn't have sent him far, not without your magic. I'm going to call Emma, Hook and David and we are going to scour every inch of this farmhouse," Regina hissed, more scared than angry. She wasn't going to give Zelena the satisfaction of knowing that, though.
"You're not going to find him here," Zelena replied, smirking as she held up her left wrist.
Her empty wrist.
Regina's stomach twisted into knots. "What happened to your cuff? How did you get it off?"
"Believe it or not, I do have a few friends in this town," Zelena replied, smirking as she crossed her arms. "Some of them even have magic."
"What did you do with Robin?" Regina conjured up a fireball, careful not to burn Margot but ready to hurl it at her sister.
Zelena squared her shoulders as a defiant look filled her eyes. "It's not fair, you know. I carried Margot—maybe not for nine months but she still grew inside me—and I gave birth to her. You and Robin can't just keep deciding when I can spend time with my daughter. I'm her mother. I'm entitled to all the time I want with her! You and Robin should be asking me to see her."
Regina glared at her sister, tempted to throw the fireball at her. "Do you hear yourself? Robin is her father and deserves a say in how she is raised as well as spend time with her. And we don't keep Margot to spite you. You keep proving time and time again that you are not ready to be a mother to her. She is better off with us until you get your act together!"
"You are spiting me!" Zelena protested, stomping her foot. "You and him are deciding that I'm not a fit mother. And you two certainly aren't biased."
"If you want an objective third party to come in, fine! We'll deal with that later," Regina snapped, desperate. "Just tell me what you did with Robin so I can get him."
Zelena's smirk returned. "If you want to find your Forest Hobo so bad, do it yourself. I'm not going to give you any clues."
Regina extinguished her fireball as she stormed past her sister, pausing to snarl: "I am going to find Robin and then I'm going to come back for a very long talk with you."
"Good luck," Zelena snapped, waving as Regina left the house.
Regina stood on the deck of the Jolly Roger, a strong sea whipping her hair around her face as she turned to face Hook at the helm. "Are you ready?"
"Aye," he said, nodding. "Let that arrow fly and the Jolly Roger will keep up, I assure you."
She nodded, holding up one of Robin's arrows. After leaving Zelena's, Regina had brought Margot home. Snow had rushed over with Neal to watch the little girl while the Merry Men set up a temporary camp in Regina's front year, ready to fight Zelena should the need arise. Emma and David were keeping an eye on her errant sister while Mal was ready to help Emma in case Zelena used magic to try to get Margot while Regina was off locating Robin.
Once she was certain all her children were safe—the Merry Men brought Roland with her and Henry was helping Belle with the library—Regina had gone to her vault. She used her magic mirror to find Robin, her heart sinking when all she could tell was that he appeared surrounded by water. He looked around, confused, and appeared to be trapped somewhere. She just didn't know if he was above water or not—but if he was underwater, it appeared he could breath. That gave her some time to save him.
She brewed a locator spell and then asked Hook for his help, knowing the Jolly Roger was the only ship who would be able to keep up once the enchanted object started to lead them to Robin.
Regina took a deep breath, covering one of Robin's arrows in the potion. It rose from her hand before flying off toward the horizon. She turned to Hook. "Follow that arrow."
"Aye, aye," he replied. "Mr. Smee, unfurl the sails!"
His faithful deckhand obeyed his orders, opening up the sails so they could catch the wind. Smee tended to the sails as the Jolly Roger left port, following the arrow toward the open sea. Regina watched the horizon for the arrow, praying Zelena hadn't sent Robin to another realm somehow.
They caught up with the arrow and Hook kept pace with it, following it as it continued to soar over the water. Regina glanced back, unable to see the shore anymore. She swallowed, wondering how far they could go and hoped they were traveling for too long.
"Don't worry," Hook told her. "I'm sure Robin isn't too far away from you."
She sighed. "I hope so but I can't be sure. Not with Zelena involved."
He nodded, looking annoyed. "Do you have any idea who took the cuff off her? Was it the Crocodile?"
"Gold still blames her for the death of his son," she told him. "He would want the cuff to stay on her. We'll have to figure out who helped her once we get Robin back."
"Good plan," he said, staring at the arrow. He frowned before shouting: "Lower the anchor, Mr. Smee!"
Regina turned to him, frowning as annoyance filled her. "Why are you stopping?"
"Because the arrow did," he replied, motioning toward it. "I would keep an eye on it."
She huffed, looking back at the arrow. It quivered over the water, darting around a bit before diving into the ocean. Regina took off her coat, folding it up and placing it on the deck. She turned to Hook. "I'll be back."
"How are you getting to the bottom of the ocean?" Smee asked, looking over the railing. He then added: "Your Majesty."
"Magic," she replied with a smirk. She waved her hands in front of her, engulfing herself in her familiar purple cloud of magic. Regina felt a tug at her navel as her legs fused together, scales covering them. Her feet turned to fins as her clothes melted away, leaving her only in a seashell bra as she landed in the chilly water.
The smoke died away and she looked up at Hook and Smee, both standing at the railing. Smee's mouth hung open and Hook looked impressed. "You make quite the mermaid, Regina," he called down.
"Thank you," she said, lifting her tail out of the water to admire the red and purple scales. Her fin was red and felt soft, trailing after her like silky ribbons.
She then waved at Hook. "I'll be back soon with Robin. Try not to do something stupid while I'm gone."
Regina dove into the water, her mermaid physiology letting her breath. She swam downward, following the magical trail left by the arrow as it took her closer and closer to the ocean floor. Her dark hair floated around her as she moved her fin and arms, eager to get to her soulmate before something dire happened.
A sunken ship came into view and she saw the magical trail led her to it. Relief filled her to know that she had found him and that he was at least somewhat safe in the wreckage. She swam through a large hole in the side of the ship and down into the ship's hold, finding the arrow lodged in the floorboard outside a room with bars on the door—the ship's brig. She tugged on the door but found it locked. It was only a minor setback as she waved her hand, hearing it unlock. Regina pushed it again and it opened, letting her into the room.
Robin sat in a corner, his hands bound by rope. His own legs had been turned into a fin as well, his covered with blue and green scales that ended in a green fin. He flipped it up every so often, as if hoping to swim out of there but unable to do so.
"Robin," she sighed, happy he was unharmed and not running out of air. She conjured up a knife. "Hold still and I'll get this off you."
"Thank you," he said. "I knew you'd find me."
She began to cut the ropes. "Zelena certainly didn't think this one through. I still don't what purpose turning you into a merman and sending you to the middle of the ocean served."
"Well, I think we've pretty much established that she usually acts on impulse and doesn't think things through," he replied, rubbing his wrists once they were free.
Regina disposed of the knife before cupping his cheek, rubbing her thumb over his scruff as she smiled. "I'm just glad she didn't do something to hurt you or send you some place I couldn't reach easily."
He smiled, cupping her cheek as well. "I know that no matter what she did, you would come find me. And I would do the same for you."
She smiled, taking his hand. "Come on. Hook is waiting for us with the Jolly Roger. I'll undo the mermaid spell and we can go home."
"That sounds good," he said, swimming after her as she led him out of the sunken ship. There was disappointment in his voice, though, and it surprised her. She thought he would want to get home to Roland and Margot as soon as possible.
Regina stopped, floating in front of him. He tilted his head, frowning in confusion as she asked: "What's wrong?"
He paused for a moment before answering: "Don't get me wrong, I'm angry that Zelena sent me away in order to take Margot from us. But…I'm kinda glad she did."
"What do you mean?" Regina asked, confused yet intrigued.
"Do you know how sexy you look right now?" he asked.
She felt her face heat up as she looked down at her fin. Looking back up at him, she said: "I didn't know you had a mermaid fetish."
"I don't," he replied. "I always think you're sexy but there's just something about the way the water plays with your hair, how your skin appears to shimmer, the way those sea shells hold up your breasts and just how the fin highlights your curves…I'm not entirely sure, but I think I have the merman equivalent of an erection."
Regina's face was really on fire. "I'm not really interested in learning how merpeople have sex, Robin."
He chuckled, pulling her closer. "I'm not suggesting we discover that. Consider this like when we roleplay in the bedroom. You know, foreplay before we have human sex."
"Can we just call it sex?" she asked, rolling her eyes as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Their torsos were pressed together and she suddenly realized his point. She ran her fingers through his hair, watching as it floated in the currents that surrounded them. His eyes seemed even bluer in the water, making her stomach flip.
Her fin wrapped around his, something she felt was an intimate gesture between merpeople—perhaps like holding hands or cuddling—as he nuzzled her. "Can't we enjoy this a little longer?"
She closed her eyes, letting him hold her as they floated in place. It was a tempting offer but she knew they couldn't. "Everyone is waiting for us. They are also really concerned, Robin. And Zelena needs to be dealt with."
He sighed, pulling away from her. "You're right. We do have to go home."
"But," she continued, smiling at him. "We do live near a harbor. And I turned myself into a mermaid…"
"So you could turn us back?" he asked, eyes lighting up.
She laughed, nodding. "If it will satisfy your mermaid kink, yes, I can turn us back and we can role play in the harbor."
"I don't have a mermaid kin…"
His protest was cut off when she pressed her hand to his mouth, smiling. "I'm just teasing you, Robin. But there's no shame in having a kink."
Robin's eyebrow went up and when she removed her hand, he asked: "Do you have a kink?"
She smiled coyly. "That's for you to discover."
"Well," he said, his voice sounding strangled, "I think…I think we should head home now."
"After we do just one thing…" She leaned in, kissing him. He nibbled on her lip, deepening the kiss as they floated in the middle of the ocean. She felt bubbles flow around them, making her hair wrap around them.
When the broke apart, he looked slightly dazed. She smiled, taking his hand and swimming upwards as they head back to the surface and the Jolly Roger.
A few nights later, Regina's Mercedes drove up to the harbor. She parked it and turned it off, slipping out into the cool night air. Robin got out of the passenger's side, closing the door as he looked over the calm water. It reflected the full moon over head, it's white glow rippling in the waves.
She took his hand, giving it a squeeze. "You ready for this?"
"I am," he said, smiling at her. It then dimmed a bit. "Are you sure you want to do this?"
Regina chuckled, cupping his cheek. "Absolutely. It should be a lot of fun. And you did make a sexy merman."
His smile brightened again as he wrapped his arm around her. "Well, then, milady, do what you have to."
She raised her hand, engulfing them in a cloud of her magic. When it died down, they floated in the middle of the harbor—she once again sported a fin made of red and purple scales while his fin was yet again blue and green. They wrapped their fins around each other as he kissed her in the pale moonlight.
One day, she would thank Zelena for turning Robin into a merman.