-Shinobu's POV-
The walk home from UA was tense to say the least. Hizashi-nii was silent and sullen, concerning me. Once we reached our apartment, Shouta came as well because he was instructed by Nezu to come with me to get the rest of my quirk suppressants. As soon as the door was closed behind us, I reached out to Hizashi-nii-san who just pulled his arm away from me, a hurt look in his eyes.
"Nii-san… I'm sorry-," I started, signing as I spoke, but he cut me off, his voice low and full of pain.
"I don't want your apologies, Shinobu! I want to know what the hell made you think that taking those suppressants was in any way okay?! Do you want a repeat of what happened to your parents?!" he responded, his voice moving to an angry tone as his chartreuse green eyes met mine, his orange sunglasses clenched in his fist. My eyes widened in hurt at his last question.
"Of course not! Were you even listening in Nezu's office?! I wanted to prevent a panic! I didn't want to accidentally cancel out a random person's senses just because I can't manage my own stupid social anxiety!" I shot back, trying to hide the pain in my own voice at the thought of what happened to my parents.
"So that makes it okay for you to do illegal drugs? Especially ones that I know cause you a lot of pain? That's why your drawbacks to your quirk have gotten so much worse! Shinobu, I can't believe you would do something so stupid!" Hizashi-nii ranted, getting a bit hysterical as he gripped my shoulders tightly as he shook me, causing me a fair amount of pain, "Did you even think about anyone else?! What would your parents say?!"
That last question earned a whimper along with the shaking causing my wound from the day before to throb. Suddenly, his grip on my shoulders was gone, and an arm was wrapped around my waist snatching me back quickly, but gently without irritating my wound further. Looking up, I saw Nii-san caught in Shouta's capture weapon, and he was absolutely seething.
"Stay out of this, Shouta!" Hizashi yelled, obviously trying to activate his quirk, "This has nothing to do with you!" I, on the other hand, was now trembling. Nii-san had never gotten mad at me or yelled at me like this in our entire lives. The hand around my waist moved to my shoulder, resting there in a comforting manner and helping keep grounded to the point where I didn't break down, at least not yet.
"Hizashi. Enough. Yelling at her and throwing what happened with her parents in her face is not gonna change what's happened," Shouta said sternly, his quirk activated, keeping Nii-san from screaming, "She made mistakes, and she's willing to move past them. Shouldn't you be supporting her right now?" At this Hizashi-nii's face turned beet red in anger.
"You don't know the first fucking thing about this situation, Shouta," Hizashi-nii-san said before turning his attention to me, "If you haven't gotten your anxiety in enough control to not cancel random citizens' senses, then you have no business being a hero at all." At that, I broke. All of my senses were cancelled, and I let out a wail that I could not hear. The panic attack that ensued then caused my airways to constrict, and after what felt like hours, but could only have been minutes, I lost consciousness.
-Shouta's POV-
As soon as Shinobu let out an ear shattering wail, I turned to cancel her quirk before pressing the pressure point on the back of her neck causing her to pass out before she could quit breathing from the obvious panic attack she was having. After catching her, I picked her up and gently laid her on the couch before turning my attention to the angry blonde still stuck in my capture weapon as I put eye drops in my now extremely dry eyes.
"Happy now?" I asked him as I released him from the capture weapon as he continued to stare at Shinobu's sleeping form in shock as I saw tears welling up in his eyes.
"Why wouldn't she tell me what she was going through?" he asked more to himself. At that, I scoffed earning a confused glare from the blonde. "And what exactly about this situation is funny, Shouta?"
"The fact that you just told her she had no business being a hero, and then wondered why she wouldn't tell you what she was struggling with," I pointed out, "It would have been irrational to tell her older cousin who she clearly looks up to about her struggles with an illegal drug problem." His tears fell down his face at this as he knelt beside the silver-haired woman and brushed a lock that had fallen into her face.
"I just… I was so angry… She puts herself at risk every time she takes those stupid pills. They made her so sick when we were kids. I tried to get her to stop taking them, but she always said that they made her parents so much happier so it was worth it," he admitted, stroking her hair gently, "So when I found out, she was still taking them despite not being forced to anymore, I was so mad. She doesn't value herself, Shouta. I-I don't know what to do to help her… I want to protect her, but I don't know if I can… Even after all this time, I'm still powerless to help her with the same issues that have plagued her since we were young. She's a big part of the reason I became a hero. So she would see that our Voice quirk could be used in a good way."
My gaze softened at this. Hizashi may have been known for being loud and obnoxious and often dragged me into situations I didn't want to be in, but he was still my best friend and he had a big heart. Sighing, I walked over to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. His eyes looked up to meet mine, and I gave him a small smirk.
"Hizashi, the only person that can overcome these demons she's facing is her. The only thing you can do is be there for support and maybe some tough love. She has a lot of potential and a strength I haven't seen often even in other pros. She'll be okay as long as she doesn't give up," I encouraged, my voice stern, "Plus, she needs a teacher for her Voice quirk, and I don't know anyone more annoyingly enthusiastic and better suited for the job than her favorite cousin and radio host." At this, Hizashi gave me a wry grin.
"Did THE Aizawa Shouta just try and cheer me up?" he teased before his smile fell slightly and he turned his gaze to Shinobu, "I doubt she will want me to teach her after all the stuff I said just now. She probably hates me." I scoffed again causing him to look at me in surprise.
"You know she listens to your radio show every week? Even if she has patrol," I reminded him, and a small smile found its way on his face again.
"Yeah. She has tuned in to every show since I first started Hands Up radio… She even used to do musical performances with me sometimes as specials for the show. Those were actually some of my most popular shows," he said with a sad smile, "It makes me happy to know that she has done that even after all this time."
"I-I never stopped, Nii-san…," a quiet, weak voice said alerting both of us to the now awake Shinobu, "I'm sorry I never told you. I just didn't want to burden you anymore than I already was." Hizashi's eyes widened at this, and he tackled her in a hug.
"It's okay, Nobu-chan! I'm sorry I said you shouldn't be a hero! I'm a terrible big cousin! Please forgive me!" Hizashi exclaimed, causing me to smile at the two cousins as Shinobu met my gaze and gave me a thankful smile. I felt my face heat up a bit, but I gave her a small smile in return.
"It's okay, Nii-san. I'm okay now. Also, you're the best big brother a girl could ask for!" she responded, her quiet voice full of enthusiasm as she returned his hug. In shock, Hizashi gripped her shoulders and pulled back to meet her matching eyes with his.
"Y-you called me your big brother…." he said in shock, and Shinobu shyly nodded.
"Y-yeah… Is that okay?" she asked nervously, earning a grin from the blonde.
"YEAHHHH!" he yelled, his quirk activating as I shot him a glare causing Shinobu to giggle before he continued to talk, his voice loud but his quirk no longer activated, "I know the perfect way to celebrate!" Shinobu and I both looked at him in confusion.
"You're gonna sing with me on Hands Up radio tonight!"
-Time Skip brought to you by my daughter chewing on my favorite Aizawa shirt like a teether (while I'm wearing it)-
-Shinobu's POV-
"I don't think this is a good idea, Nii-san," I fretted nervously while signing as he continued setting up for his radio show. Shouta and I had already taken my other pills to Nezu before I had to come back and get ready. To say I was nervous was an understatement. Nii-san had already told me that I would be playing the piano as well tonight which was not helping my nerves. And for some reason, he just had to invite Shouta too. He claimed it was to make sure I didn't accidentally cancel my own hearing during the performance.
"Oh come on, Nobu-chan! You have an amazing voice! It's been so long since I've heard you sing! It'll be a treat for all of my listeners and for me and Shouta too, right Shouta?" Hizashi-nii encouraged, turning with an excited grin to the raven-haired man in question who looked at me before just humming in response.
"O-okay… Thanks, Nii-san… I'll do my best…" I decided, trying to be confident despite my nerves. Okay, Shinobu. It's just Nii-san and his friend… His insanely attractive friend who is now my boss and who I will be spending an excessive amount of time with for work. Shit. Wrong train of thought, Shinobu! Focus! You can do this! Music is your escape! You can do this! I gave myself a pep talk inside as I sat nervously at the piano in the soundproof room staring through the glass as Nii-san started his radio show.
"Relax," a low voice stated from beside me as I looked up in shock to see Shouta standing there as he placed a hand on my shoulder, "Hizashi says you've done this before. So you have no need to be nervous. It's irrational." I rolled my eyes and giggled at his comment.
"Do you only ever think of things in terms of rationality, Aizawa-sensei?" I teased with a small smile as he sat down beside me on the piano bench as his onyx eyes met mine.
"It makes life much simpler that way, Nobu-chan," he teased back, his voice low and serious sounding, the only hint that he was teasing was the wild grin he gave afterwards that caused me to break into a full on laugh as a blush colored my cheeks at the nickname.
"Thank you, Shouta-kun," I said with a smile after my laugh calmed down as he gave me a questioning look, "You were distracting me to get me to relax before my performance. I appreciate it. Makes more sense now that you're a teacher." He looked shocked at my comments before giving me a small smirk.
"Well, you might just make it through this year as my sidekick, Muffle," he said as he began to get up from the piano bench. Feeling the panic beginning to set in again, I reached up and grabbed the sleeve of his black shirt causing him to stop and look at me with a questioning expression.
"Um… If it's not too much to ask, Shouta-kun, would you mind sitting by me for the performance?... It might help me relax a little bit if I have somebody with me that I can trust," I admitted sheepishly, looking at the ivory keys in front of me, too embarrassed to look him in the face as I asked, letting go of his sleeve, fully expecting him to get up and deny my request.
To my surprise, I felt the weight return on the bench beside me, and I smiled to myself as Hizashi-nii's voice could suddenly be heard in the booth we were in.
"Now listeners, tonight we have a special treat for all of you! It's been years since this special guest has made a guest appearance on my show, so it is my great pleasure to reintroduce Pro Hero: Muffle, who will be performing a song just for the listeners of Hands Up Radio! Take it away, Muffle!" Looking into the other room through the clear glass, I saw Nii-san encouraging me with a smile and huge thumbs up as I returned his smile before taking a deep breath and beginning the song.
I've gotta keep the calm before the storm
I don't want less, I don't want more
Must bar the windows and the doors
To keep me safe, to keep me warm
Yeah my life is what I'm fighting for
Can't part the sea, can't reach the shore
And my voice becomes the driving force
I won't let this pull me overboard
Gotta keep my head above water
Don't let me drown, it gets harder
I'll meet you there at the altar
As I fall down to my knees
Don't let me drown, drown, drown
Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me drown
So pull me up from down below
'Cause I'm underneath the undertow
Come dry me off and hold me close
I need you now I need you most
Gotta keep my head above water
Don't let me drown, it gets harder
I'll meet you there at the altar
As I fall down to my knees
Don't let me drown, drown, drown
(Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me drown)
Don't let me drown, drown, drown
And keep my head above water
(Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me drown)
Above water
And I can't see in the stormy weather
I can't seem to keep it all together
And I can't swim the ocean like this forever
And I can't breathe
Gotta keep my head above water
I lose my breath at the bottom
Come rescue me, I'll be waiting
I'm too young to fall asleep
Gotta keep my head above water
Don't let me drown, it gets harder
I'll meet you there at the altar
As I fall down to my knees
Don't let me drown
Don't let me drown
(Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me drown)
Don't let me drown
And keep my head above water
(Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me drown)
Above water
-Shouta POV-
The second Shinobu started playing the piano, it was like I was entranced. My eyes couldn't go anywhere else. She looked so emotional and happy as she played. Then, she started to sing. Her voice was so much stronger and louder than I had ever heard it. The musicality of her voice was only proven with each note she hit, and I found myself in awe of the woman I was sitting beside.
It was so obvious that this woman had faced way too much for her age, but she was so determined to keep going. The lyrics to the songs seemed to reflect her emotions as she allowed herself to be lost in the lyrics and the playing of the piano. I found myself silently thanking Hizashi for dragging me along to this. As she reached the last Don't let me drown, her chartreuse eyes fluttered open to meet mine as she gave me a smile that I swear could not have been good for my heart. Only one thought crossed my mind as our eyes met, and I found myself returning her smile with a small sincere one of my own.
This woman is gonna be the death of me I swear.
Song: Head Above Water by Avril Lavigne
A/N:
I know the song talks about God in it, and while I'm totally cool with this and I love the song as it is, it does not fit the idea of what Shinobu was trying to convey in this chapter. Since they are in Japan, where Shintoism and Buddhism are the most prominent religions, her singing about God in this situation did not make sense. Hope you all enjoyed the chapter! :)