A/N So this is two days later after her parent's anniversary and it's their first date. Yay!
Disclaimer: I don't own Divergent.
Tris POV
I try to sit as still as possible with Christina poking me in the eye with the mascara wand. Oh Gods why did I think that asking her to help me get ready for my date with Tobias was a good idea?
I'm seriously regretting that right now. I'm feeling nervous enough as it is. I haven't been on a date in a long time and I don't know where he is taking me. He just told me to dress casual. I glance at my outfit I'm wearing an off shoulder white top paired with some black skinny jeans. I guess I look okay though.
My makeup is simple just the way I like it. Christina leaves after giving me her nod of approval but not before making me promise that I'd tell her everything that happened since the last 4 days.
I'd been sad but he knew how to cheer me up and had taken great care of me. I liked that he knew what I wanted without me ever needing to tell him. I loved the way he held me close while I was crying and he also told me his real name apparently besides me Zeke is the only one who knows. Even Shauna doesn't know. So I feel really happy when he told me that. It showed that he trusted me and I too trust him. Completely. If he hadn't been there these past few days I would've been a mess but he really helped. And now I'm going on a date with him!
Suddenly the doorbell rings interrupting my thoughts and I become nervous again taking a few deep breaths and checking whether my hair and outfit is in place I open the door. It reveals Tobias standing there looking effortlessly handsome in a plain white t-shirt and black jeans. He has some flowers in his hand and is staring at me open-mouthed.
As he realizes he had been staring he quickly closes his mouth a blush creeping up his neck and stutters out, "Um-he-hey Tris you um, you look great and- uh "
I cut him off there with a laugh although I'm sure I'm blushing as well, "Well you don't look half as bad yourself Tobias."
His grin gets even wider if possible and he hands me the flowers he got me. They look really pretty. I thank him for them and quickly head inside putting them in water and on the way out grab my wallet and keys locking the door behind me.
"Ready to go?" He asks smirking at me.
"Yeah but where are we going?" I ask him again hoping this time he'll finally cave in and tell me but alas no such luck as he says, "Nope you aren't getting it out of me you just have to be patient."
I huff but then lean back again. Tobias turns on the radio and some country song starts playing Tobias softly humming along with it as he drives one hand on top of mine.
We drive in a soft silence me listening to him hum under his breath. After a moment though he smirks at me and pulls over handing me a blindfold. I pout at him whining, "Do I have to?"
He simply rolls his eyes using the same tone as me replies, "Yes you have to Trissy. Here give I'll tie it for you."
I give in but not before saying, "If I fall you're catching me." He just grins and replies, "I'd do that anyway." I guess he didn't mean for that to come out as his cheeks redden and a flush creeps up his neck.
I blush too and clear my throat and turn my back to him waiting for him to tie the blindfold. As his hands skim my neck my breath hitches and I swear his does too. I'm sure I must be tomato red by now. By the time he's finished I feel completely flushed by his hands that lingered a little longer than necessary not that I'm complaining though.
He pulls away starting the car again as we once more drive in the comfortable silence. A few minutes later he pulls the car to a stop and I hear the opening and closing of a door.
Then I hear my side of the door open and a hand guides me out closing the door softly behind me. I can hear the sounds of joyful music and happy screams of people from here and I grin as I realize where we are.
Slowly I feel someone move behind me and remove the blindfold. I turn around and face Four who is looking expectantly at me. I reach up on my toes an press a kiss to his cheek then whisper a 'thank you' in his ear before pulling away. He just stands there looking dazed before he shakes himself out of it.
Then a grin splits his face as he realizes I like it and he pulls me along with him to the entry.
The rest of the night is spent in laughing, chatting and a definite competitive streak as we both compete to see who would win the most challenges. He ended up winning but only by one point.
"So where to next?" He asks me as I look around deciding. We've rode almost every ride here then my eyes catch the Ferris wheel and I turn around to tell him so.
When I mention the wheel his grin falters for a second before he smiles again. Concerned, I look at him questioningly. He just shrugs and then pulls me along with him to the ticket booth.
As we get nearer and nearer to the Wheel I can see Tobias getting more and more nervous at one point I even ask him what's wrong but he just shakes me off saying 'nothing' and to 'just enjoy the ride'.
Even though he is smiling I can't help but notice that it looks a bit strained but I decide not to question it. Once we are finally settled in a carriage Tobias is practically shaking so I finally grab his chin turning him towards me and ask him, "What's wrong Tobias it's clearly something, please tell me."
He gives a shaky laugh and replies nervously, "Um well now might not be the best time to mention it but I'm afraid of um heights." He says the last part in a rush but I understand him perfectly.
"Oh God Tobias! Then why did you come up here. You could've just told me." I can feel the guilt gnawing at me. Why didn't I notice this sooner? Ugh!
He looks intently at me replying, "Because I wanted to and Tris it isn't your fault okay I myself wholeheartedly wanted to. Besides it's high time I got over it."
We're almost at the top right now and I can see that Tobias is doing his best to not look down so I do the only thing I can do. I lean forward and kiss him.
He freezes in shock for a moment before kissing me back even harder. His lips are so soft and warm that they make me forget everything around us. Eventually we pull apart and softly ask him, "Got over you fear yet?"
He gives me a cheeky grin replying, "Yeah. Yeah I definitely got over it now." Then the ride comes to a stop and we get out. I reach out taking his hand in mine. It fits perfectly. I can still feel him shaking a bit but he looks much better than before.
He smiles at me making my heart melt and presses a chaste kiss to my lips saying, "You're the best."
Then without a word leads me away for more entertainment. After some more time we leave and he takes me for some ice cream before dropping me off home.
I unlock my front door, facing him.
He gazes at me for a moment before saying, "I guess this is it then." He sounds a bit disappointed. And I know I want to spend more time with him so I invite him inside.
Luckily he accepts and we settle on the couch with some wine. I've noticed that he doesn't drink much. He'll limit himself to a beer or two, nothing more than that and occasionally some wine that's it. Nothing else. I wonder why.
For a few minutes we sit in silence. I glance over at Tobias he seems deep in thought as if he's fighting some internal battle with himself. I place my hand on his and when he glances up at me confused I give him a reassuring smile. He searches my eyes for another moment before taking a deep breath and saying,
"Well you must be wondering what happened at the Ferris wheel, right? As I told you I'm afraid of heights but I didn't tell you why. You know my name is Tobias Eaton son of Marcus Eaton."
I give him a short nod conforming to his sort of question. All I know about Marcus Eaton is that he was quite the influential person and politician. He was friends with my dad and I often saw them together.
I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I hear Tobias speak again, "Well I didn't have the best childhood growing up. Marcus he was…well…abusive." My heart sinks as I hear his words but I don't say anything just holding him closer to me.
He then continues, "He used to come home drunk. A lot of times. Reeking of beer and god knows what else." Ah. So that's why he doesn't drink.
He starts again, "He used to hit my mom only first. She would protect me but I could hear her scream and one day, she killed herself and then he turned to his next punching bag, me. It started when I was 7 but he didn't use the belt till I was 9. He used to lock me in a closet for days so I have claustrophobia too. And as a punishment he used to hang me from the balcony or the top of the stairs. That's where I get the fear of heights from. All in all I had a pretty shitty childhood and I'd….I'd understand if you didn't want to stay with someone like me. You deserve someone much better. I'm just a broken person. I'm a monster." He says that last part so lowly that I have to strain to hear but once I understand my heart breaks for him.
The innocent little boy tainted by the acts of his so called selfless father. I feel an anger inside me, towards Marcus for treating his son that way, to his mother for leaving him in the hands of that monster and towards Tobias himself for thinking so low of himself. But I shake it out and even as tears threaten to fall from my eyes I blink them back knowing that I have to be strong for him.
"Tobias" I call towards him but he doesn't even look at him choosing to stare at the wall instead. I softly pull his face towards me and force his eyes to meet mine. And what I see in his eyes almost breaks me. I can see years of anger, pain and hurt buried inside there's also guilt and shame at himself which I vow to change.
"Tobias listen to me. You aren't a monster no matter what he told you. Whatever you told me just shows that you are much braver and stronger than anyone else. You suffered but came out of it stronger. And if anyone doesn't deserve someone else it's me who doesn't deserve you." He opens his mouth to protest but I stop him.
"No. Listen to me Tobias. You are the one who took care of me when I felt lost. You were there for me. You are not a monster. You hear me?"
By this point there are tears in his eyes and one slips out. I gently wipe it away with my thumb then lean in and kiss him softly he returns it back the same gentle way. And for that minute nothing matters except both of us. Here and now.
Then I realize that we are both broken in our own ways but together we can fix ourselves. (I can't remember the actual quote and I'm too lazy to find it. So just go with this one.)
The rest of the night is spent in watching some movie and we talk about light hearted stuff. I can see that Tobias is still a bit uneasy but I know that given time he will feel better and I'm going to help with that.
A/N Well I hope you guys like that. I think it was a bit trashy and I could've done better but right now my mind isn't working anymore. So there you have it the 21st chapter of the fic.
Wow! It's come a long way. Four more chapters to go and this will come to an end. Thank you to all those who favorited, followed and reviewed