Ritsuko

"It's not your fault," Gendo said.

Ritsuko sighed, pulling away from his touch. She didn't reply. Instead, she simply lay beneath the thin cover. These rare meetings seemed to be becoming rarer. It made sense, given all that was happening. The second Angel had yet to arrive, yet there was only chaos and confusion.

It had been worse ever since that fiasco with Zenitsu.

"It would have turned out well for us," Gendo continued. She could never be sure if he was looking at her. He always seemed to be aiming so much higher and so much further beyond. Unfortunately, it gave him gravitas. This man had a vision, and he was, in the most literal sense, bending reality to see it through. It was incredible how much he had accomplished in so little time.

It also made Ikari Gendo was a strange bedfellow. Maybe that was part of the thrill. In the most passionate moments, she could tear those eyes away from his vision, so they would only see her. She could reroute that vigor and energy so that he could, for some moments, dedicate himself to her.

Or maybe they were just two lonely adults, too busy to find release beyond the workplace. As much as Ritsuko wanted to believe that theory, it was quickly disproven. She'd refused her share of advances, all while accepting Gendo.

Beside her, he continued. "It's that boar-child who's making things difficult."

Ritsuko sighed, then pushed herself up. She sat on the edge of the bed, running the events through her mind once more.

Zenitsu had been unconscious for the past week, inactive save for some mumbling. Inosuke had stayed by his side since then, insisting that it was strange that his unconscious friend didn't move in all this time. Inosuke trained and slept there. His yelling had annoyed more than a few people in the medical building.

They might have been able to get him to leave, if only for a moment, if Shinji wasn't bringing the madman food.

Ritsuko sighed, then pushed off the mattress.

A strong arm gently wrapped around her waist. "What you've managed to do in this situation is nothing short of incredible. As always," he took her chin and turned her to face him. "I need you." He looked her in the eye as he said it.

Once again, amidst all the confusion and pain and sadness that made up Ritsuko's life, she was able to forget it all for a brief while.

Shinji

He knocked on the door. Immediately, Inosuke snarled from within. "Back off! Go away! What did you do to my friend?"

"It's me," he calmly replied.

"Oh, come in."

Shinji stepped into the hospital room. Zenitsu remained unconscious. Inosuke, for his part, was doing rapid one-armed push-ups. "Hey, kid," he said without effort. "Didn't see you yesterday."

Shinji placed a bag of convenience store food on the table beside the hospital bed. "Sorry about that. School was busy. I got caught up in the homework."

The strange man pushed himself to his feet and marched to the bag. "Onigiri?"

Shinji pulled out four rice balls. "I also got you a protein bar since you seemed to be worried about training."

"Cool," he said, devouring an onigiri. "What's protein?"

"Eh-heh…" Shinji chuckled awkwardly.

When the uncomfortable sound was left to rest, Shinji stared at his food. The emptiness surged up from his chest and snapped a fist shut around his heart. He followed the feeling. This seeming deadness was easier for everyone.

Inosuke glared at him suspiciously. The mask was lifted over his face as he ate, leaving his bright green eyes to stare down Shinji. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?" Shinji asked without emotion.

"You turned off." He made a motion like toggling a switch on his temple. "You're the only person I've ever met who can stop… feeling. Suddenly, there's nothing there." He gestured to Shinji's entire body. "I can feel you because there's a lump in the way. All the sudden, you're just this… heaviness."

"Heaviness," Shinji repeated. Like a rock at the bottom of the ocean. Sonar picks it up, but it's just part of the scenery. It just lies there. It's in the way for a lot of things, not that it asked to be there.

Shinji took another bite.

"Hey, Shinji."

The third Child didn't respond.

"Oi."

Shinji shrugged.

"I don't get you."

No one does, he thought. No one bothers to try.

Inosuke devoured his food quickly. "Thanks for the meal. I owe you a lot for feeding me all this time. There any word about anyone else from my Japan? Or anything about an Angel?"

"No. Nothing yet. Misato said someone will come let you know when there's another Angel."

Inosuke began tapping his sandal on the floor. "Hmm." Suddenly, he smacked a fist down onto an open palm. "Oh! I think I get it!"

Shinji looked up. Somewhere in the emptiness, he felt an idle curiosity for what the strange warrior would say.

"You don't want to fight."

Shinji blinked, then sighed. "You only got that now?"

"Shut up! It's not something that makes sense to me. I've been fighting since I was a kid. Zenitsu here was training since he could walk. Most people I know were fighting all their lives. They didn't have any choice. It still seems weird to me that you can choose to not fight in this world. Almost everyone I know lost someone to the demons. So, with these Angel things, everything is different. I don't get it."

Shinji looked at him. After a few minutes, he nodded. "A lot of people lost something to the Angels."

Inosuke tilted his head. "I thought that one I saw was the first."

Shinji shook his head. "It's the first in a long time. They came before."

"Oh." He hung his head. "I don't know anything about this Japan."

Shinji moved toward his backpack. "Do you want me to tell you about it? We went over it in today's history lesson."

Inosuke shook his head. "Unless it's something about how to fight them. I'll pass. I'm no good with that stuff. Be sure to tell Zenitsu when he wakes up. He'll probably be into that."

"How is he?" Shinji asked.

They both looked at the unconscious form. His vitals were stable. He was perfectly healthy.

"He wants to wake up," Inosuke said. "I'll wait until he does. I don't want Nerv trying something else on him."

Shinji nodded. "I should get going now. I have a lot of chores to do tonight."

"Alright. Just remember one thing. Next time you go in the Eva, I'll be on the ground. I'll help you in any way I can."

Anger swelled. A visceral confusion filled him at the emotion, but all that showed was the anger. "Why? Why would you go out of your way for me like that?" He didn't believe it. His tone was dripping with enmity. Yet, he couldn't tell why. The sudden irritation was nothing like he really felt. The emotion scared and confused him, but that was all hidden deep within, with only the frustration taking form at the top.

Inosuke cocked his head. "Kid, are you…" he shook his head. "It's not just about you. The sooner we destroy that thing, the fewer homes get destroyed, right? All those metal ships and things have people in them. If we kill it quick, we save people. That's what I'm interested in. So, don't worry. I got your back."

The frustration, slowly, vented out. "Oh…" he said dumbly. His brain felt empty. He looked vacantly into the room for several seconds. Eventually, he said, "Thank you," and left.

Inosuke

Inosuke practiced his form. He swung his blades from every angle hundreds of times. His footwork remained quick and precise. Inosuke was still training when the door opened.

Instantly, he stopped his practice, sword frozen high in the air. He spoke before his guest stepped into the room. "Why do you smell like an Eva?"

A girl, about his age, closed the door behind her. She had blue hair (much lighter than his) and red eyes. Her hand was in a cast, and there were bandages on her head. "My name is Ayanami Rei. I am the pilot of Unit-00."

"Oh," Inosuke sheathed his swords and sat on the edge of Zenitsu's bed. "So, there is another pilot. Nerv's been keeping secrets, huh?"

While her body faced Inosuke, her eyes were on Zenitsu. Rei said, "I've been incapacitated." Zenitsu twitched at her voice. "There was no realistic way for me to pilot an Eva at the time. I was too injured."

"Oh? That so?"

"Yes. I merely help Mr. Ikari."

Inosuke cocked his head. "Shinji's dad?"

She nodded.

Inosuke grimaced beneath his mask. "That piece of shit? Don't tell me you trust that prick."

The girl's expression hardened, though her voice remained soft. "Mr. Ikari is a great man."

Inosuke stared at her. He wanted to say 'shut up' and stick his tongue out at her. Somehow, he kept calm. This girl made his brain hurt. It wasn't like with Shinji. Shinji switched from being a heavy cloud of sadness to being a harsh wave of fear. This girl felt like a fog. She was barely there. It felt too simple, like she was the leftovers of a person, or maybe the unfinished version of one.

He'd never experienced anything like it before. He sighed. It didn't make sense, but that was the norm around here.

"Why'd you come?" Inosuke asked.

Rei stepped forward. "I wanted to meet you."

"Did that stupid orange-glasses prick tell you to talk to me."

Rei's face barely moved. Her eyebrows scrunched slightly closer together in a look of frustration. Inosuke looked up at her blandly. She stepped forward, raised her hand, and struck him with her palm. "Mr. Ikari is a great man. Don't insult him."

She said it as if she were the expert on the subject. Inosuke would have talked the same way about living in the forest.

Inosuke stood. To his surprise, their eyes met when he reached his full height. They were equally tall. That felt wrong. She was so frail. So thin.

Wait, this frail girl was an Eva pilot? She looked like a doll. Nothing about her suggested she'd had any training. He found no impression that she was suited to fighting. He looked at her wounds again. The broken hand. The bandage. There were several freshly healed bruises and scars, he was certain. This small woman was supposed to fight giant monsters.

Inosuke crossed his arms and did something he almost never did: he thought.

She smelled like the Eva, so she'd been in one. She'd been in an accident, so she was probably in an accident involving an Eva. Shinji was the only one who fought the first Angel. So, she was injured before the Angel attack.

He said, "Did you get hurt like that training?"

"What do you mean?" All frustration left her. The voice which spoke was empty.

Inosuke tried again. "You're hurt. Did it happen in an Eva?"

"Yes. What does it matter?"

He put a hand to his head. It was getting more confusing. "They made you pilot one?"

"No. You're wrong. I pilot the Eva because I want to."

Inosuke stared. "Why would you want to?"

"I was ordered to pilot. So, I will pilot."

"You…"

Where was it? Where was anything with this girl? She really was some kind of fog. Shinji gave off feelings, at least. Sure, they were unfocused, and they changed quickly, but they were feelings. This girl, though, seemed inhuman. He couldn't understand her. "Did you want to say something to me or what?"

She'd looked him in the eye all through their conversation. "It's foolish to interfere with the Angels. If you go outside while the Eva is fighting, you will die. You may even get in the way."

"Ha!" The bark of laughter made the blue-haired girl flinch. It was a tiny flinch, but still. Inosuke laughed harder. "Ha! You're telling me it's stupid? That it can't be done? Perfect! I needed that! It's been too long since I had to do something impossible! Just you wait! I'll do what Tanjiro never did. I'll help defeat an Angel!"

Her red eyes were narrowed into an expression Inosuke recognized, cold hatred. What little sense he could feel from her gave a unified wave of dislike, directed at him. It was nothing like the wild fury of Muzan and the demons. That feeling went in all directions. It was like a storm. This was precise. Rei directed all bad thoughts at Inosuke in that moment. "You're being too immature. This isn't a game. People will die if you don't take this seriously."

Inosuke crossed his arms. "Something's off about you."

She left as calmly and coldly as she'd entered.

Once she'd left. Inosuke continued to train. He did push-ups and practiced his form in the hospital room.

Time passed. The sun rose and fell.

One afternoon, as sudden as intense as a thunderclap, Inosuke felt something pull in his chest. At the same moment, Zenitsu groaned.

"Angel," the boar-headed warrior grumbled. He turned to his friend. "Oi, wake up."

Zenitsu squirmed uncomfortably. Inosuke shook his head and rubbed at the goosebumps that formed on his arms. The air had changed with the arrival of the Angel. Something was wrong. Inosuke walked to his friend and poked his shoulder. "Zenitsu. You need to wake up. I promised the kid I'd help him. Wake up so I can go."

Zenitsu didn't react.

Inosuke stared down at him. Several seconds passed. Inosuke felt bad, but he'd made a promise. He'd help the kid. "Dammit!" he yelled before charging out of the room.

Misato

The military wasted no time with the second Angel. They dumped their ammunition onto it as if they were desperate to be rid of the bullets. The call for the Eva came quickly. Shinji would be ready in no time. He'd had training. The operation should be simple, but nothing ever was.

Things seemed to be going too well.

"Oi!" there it was.

Misato rolled her eyes as the shirtless lump of muscles sprinted through the highly secret Nerv base, screaming her name all the while. "You can talk to Shinji, right?"

Most of the Nerv employees were ignoring him. Misato decided to get it over with quickly. "Yes, we can communicate with him while he's in the Eva. Do you need to tell him—"

"Give me something!" He ordered. "I'm gonna go back outside. Make it so I can talk to him, too!"

"Wha—" the captain was about to roll her eyes at the stupidity of the request, but she stopped. She'd seen his strength and speed.

"Follow me. We'll put a headset in your mask."

Shinji

"Take aim. Pull the trigger. Take aim. Pull the trigger."

He was shaking. Back in the Eva. Moments from combat. His body trembled. The LCL fluid rushed in and out of him in gasps. He tried to steady his breathing. Though he wasn't certain, it seemed like his heartbeat was reverberating throughout the entry plug.

He might die this time.

And if he died, everyone would die. He was the last hope, they said. But last time, he'd only taken one step. If he failed, everyone would die. Humanity would be extinct if he failed. What if the Angel was too strong? What if he had bad luck? What if he tripped?

What if he failed? In their dying moments, every single person in the world would know that Shinji Ikari had was responsible. He hadn't been good enough.

He'd never been good enough. He knew that. Why had they asked him to do this, of all people? He wasn't qualified to be alive, let alone save people!

"Take aim. Pull the trigger. Take aim. Pull the tri—"

"Who the hell are you shitheads!" Inosuke roared over the comms. "There are two kids here! I thought you said everyone was supposed to hide!"

"There are civilians?" Misato's voice broke through.

"I got 'em." There were several frustrated grunts on his end.

"Hey, watch it. I just want to see it!"

"Don't be so rough!"

Shinji froze.

Those voices were familiar. They were his classmates. One of those voices belonged to the boy who had punched him.

His classmates had come to watch him fail. The one boy was mad that Shinji had let his sister die. Now, he'd come far to watch Shinji fail the rest of humanity.

The gnawing, empty void within Shinji devoured all sense of comfort and safety. It was a physical feeling. The black hole pulled at his muscles, making him want to curl into the fetal position.

"Take aim. Pull the trigger."

In the distance, Ritsuko reminded him of the training they'd done.

"Oi! Shinji!" Inosuke snarled into the mic. "You've got this, kid. No worries."

The doors opened. He leapt out, took aim, and pulled the trigger. He barely saw the beast before firing. Several seconds passed before he realized he was screaming. But he'd pulled the trigger. There was only smoke. He was finished, right? He did it?

Suddenly, two red tendrils shot out from the smoke. Then, agony.

It happened instantly. Buildings collapsed around him. The umbilical cable was cut. Misato yelled that he only had five minutes left in the Eva.

Glass shattered. Concrete crumbled.

He was failing. Everyone would die. It was his fault. All he'd had to do was pull the trigger, but he failed!

The gun was torn from his grip. The tendril pierced him and twisted. He felt it writhing within him. Something burning and angry was twisting through his shoulder. He screamed.

The voices on the mic assailed him as the Angel pressed forward. It was all the same storm. A glowing red tendril struck him to the ground. It wrapped around Unit-01's ankle, dragged it through the street, hoisted it into the air, and threw it.

The world sailed beneath Shinji before the giant machine crashed into a hill. He nearly vomited.

"Shinji," Misato's voice cut through the madness. "Retreat for now. We'll get you reloaded and—"

"Like hell!" Inosuke roared, his microphone crackling. "I sent the kids running for shelter. Shinji and I are gonna take that thing down!"

"Shinji," Misato said authoritatively as the second Angel approached. "The strategic thing to do is retreat for now."

As all this occurred, the pilot of Unit-01 was mumbling under his breath. "I mustn't run away." He didn't realize he was saying it until he'd done so several times. "I mustn't run away. I mustn't run away. I mustn't run away."

Retreating was failing. Failing meant everyone died. Shinji didn't want to be the reason everyone died!

Suddenly, he forced his eyes open. He saw the hill that Unit-01 lay upon. A small form rushed into view, Inosuke. The boar-headed warrior leaped onto Unit-01's hand and jumped up the arm until it was on the Eva's shoulder. "We've got this! Fight back!"

He looked out. The Angel was approaching.

"I mustn't run away."

The Prog knife appeared at his shoulder. He grabbed it. Unit-01 pushed itself from the mountain. Everyone's voices blended into his scream as he charged. What were they saying? He didn't know. He didn't care. It didn't matter. He needed to win. There was no option. People had come to watch him fail. He needed to win.

Two red tendrils pierced through him as he struck the Angel's core with the Prog knife. Sparks flew. Pain erupted. Tendrils stabbed through him. Unit-01 was being pushed back. He clutched the knife. He wouldn't go. He wouldn't fail.

As he stared at the knife, he saw Inosuke sprint down Unit-01's arm. He was a blur. No person could run that fast. The boar-headed warrior drove his swords into a crack made by the knife. They sunk to the hilt. More sparks erupted.

Bright hot heat swallowed Inosuke.

Suddenly, a wail of pain filled the comms. There was no chance for another voice to speak over it. Shinji almost lost focus on the attack, but the tendrils continued to writhe inside Unit-01. Pain swelled within him. He would not fail. They would not fail.

He pressed forward, pushing everything into the Angel that pressed toward him. The cry of pain became one of fury.

Soon, the light faded in the Angel's core. The sparks ceased. The tendrils dropped lifelessly.

"The—" Ritsuko's voice sounded over the comms. "The Angel is defeated."

Shinji's whole body was shaking. He stared forward, unable to close his eyes or form a sentence. His breath was ragged. It felt like every muscle was spasming independently of the others. His eyes slowly focused on Inosuke.

The boar-headed warrior stood at on one of Unit-01's fingers. His body was burned, leaning on the hilts of the swords that were stuck into the core. The fur of the mask had blackened.

He was covered in burns. Wisps of smoke rose from his body. There was no sound coming from him on the comms.

Suddenly, the warrior slumped away from the swords. The legs folded. Inosuke fell. Shinji caught him with an open palm.

As he caught Inosuke, the energy ran out on Unit-01.

Zenitsu

"Kyaa!" Zenitsu leapt from his back and instantly onto his feet. "Where am I? What is this? I was drowning! I'm dying! Help me!"

Zenitsu's heart raced as if he were in a life-or-death battle. He didn't hear anybody coming to help him.

"Nobody cares about me…" he muttered as he sat down on the bed. "I almost died, you know!" he shouted at nobody. "I only got in that stupid Eva because I heard it might help! But no. Instead, I almost drown. Nobody was here to pick me up. Nobody stayed with me. Why? Even Inosuke left me. It's all—"

Suddenly, he noticed Rei Ayanami sitting quietly beside his bed.

"You're too noisy," she said. "Stop yelling."

After several seconds of stunned silence, he tilted his head. "What?"

"Inosuke stayed with in this room for over a week. He left to fight the Angel. It's now been defeated."

"Eh?"

"Please be quiet."

She stood and started to leave.

"Wait." The calmness of his voice surprised even Zenitsu. All his energy had left. In this strange world, the strangest thing thus far was this girl. He hadn't noticed her when she'd been directly beside him. More than that, this girl sounded familiar. Her voice was like the many voices he'd heard from deep within Nerv.

Her voice was almost dead. There was the hint of emotion in it, but hardly. It was something still being developed. It didn't seem right. "Who—" he began.

"Please stop," she said. "I need to go. Don't bother anyone else."

"What are you?"

She froze, turned toward the door. "What?"

"You… you're… You're a person, but…"

"Please stop talking. I really need to go now. You scare the doctors and nurses."

"Wait!" Zenitsu stretched an arm after her, but she was gone. He stared at the door, hand frozen in the air. After several seconds, he noticed something. He was dressed in a hospital gown, so only part of his arm was covered. In the crook of his elbow, there was a small dot. Zenitsu didn't know much about medicine, but he quickly recognized the prick of a needle.

Misato

"It looks worse than it is," Inosuke said from his hospital bed. His voice was an exhausted rasp. "I'm lucky," he said. "I once screamed so hard I ruined my voice. Couldn't talk right for a long time. For a while, I thought I'd done that again.

His body was covered in burns. It was a miracle the boar mask hadn't been reduced to ash. It had protected his head from the worst of the damage, at least. His torso, meanwhile, was a mess of burns. It looked like high-grade fireworks had exploded on his skin. The colour was wrong. Entire patches of the skin were blackened. It looked like he should be in constant agony, but he spoke cheerfully.

"Thank you for your assistance," Misato said in the most diplomatic tone she could manage. "You did far more than we would have ever asked of you." She would have said the same thing if all he'd done was escort the student civilians to safety.

Instead, he'd needed to be carried here.

"Hey," he said. "You sound too stiff. Don't worry. I've recovered from worse than this. I'll be up in no time."

The thought rang out in her mind: this is a child! Otherworldly or not, Inosuke was still just a teenager. She looked to Shinji, who sat sullenly in the corner of the room, beside Inosuke's swords. He'd been in the room ever since Inosuke had been admitted. He'd been attached to the blades, and he told the doctors to let Inosuke keep the mask. It was the most vocal she'd seen him so far.

Misato sighed. "I mean it. Shinji, Inosuke, you both did something incredible today."

Shinji didn't react. Inosuke said, "We're monster killers. All we did was kill a monster. Right, Shinji?"

The Third didn't react.

Misato nodded. "Well, come home when you're ready, Shinji. I'll make dinner tonight."

He didn't react as she left the room. Once she'd stepped outside, she paused beside the door to Inosuke's room.

They were children. Children. With all the money, technology, and planning Nerv had done, the day had been saved by a depressed child and a madman with swords. Inosuke's scream would haunt her, she knew. She knew from experience what awful sounds the human voice could create when in enough pain, and Inosuke's scream amidst the sparks brought back nightmares she'd thought buried.

He'd run into that hell. He did that willingly.

They were children.

"Hey," she heard Inosuke say from his room. "You did good, Shinji."

There was no response.

Inosuke continued, "I can feel that you're hurt. You don't need to hide it around me."

Faintly, she heard Shinji respond. "Like I can say anything. You're the one covered in scars. I don't have the right to complain when you're—"

"Shinji. We won. It's over. You're allowed to let it out of your system now. You cry off the battlefield so you don't get distracted on it."

"I can't complain when I'm beside you. I thought you were going to die. With all that pain—"

"I've noticed something here. In this world, there's a lot more internal pain than I'm used to. People here have something happening inside them a lot. I don't know what it's like in the Eva. I don't know what you experienced. Right now, we're fellow warriors in recovery. You do what you need to do. We'll each recover in our own way. "

Misato listened. After a few seconds, she heard sobbing.

Ritsuko

Of all her sins, this was the strangest. The scientist turned to the knock at her laboratory door. She turned to see Rei Ayanami enter.

Casually, the girl lifted a syringe. "I got the sample you requested. I also stayed to observe him. He awoke at the exact time the Angel was confirmed to be dead."

"I see. Where's Zenitsu now?"

"I heard he was in the forest where Inosuke found him, trying again to find a way back to his home."

Rei walked up to Ritsuko and held out the syringe.

The scientist took it. They'd taken blood from an unconscious teenager. It was yet another line on the list of her sins. If it could help in any way, however, she would have no regret.

"I presume he didn't see you take the sample."

"No, he didn't notice me right away when he woke up. He seemed to find me strange."

He's not the only one, she thought. "Thank you, Rei. Please, take the rest of the evening for yourself."

"Yes. Thank you."