A/N: Just another filler. Mostly fluff with a tiny bit of angst thrown in. Enjoy! xxx
"Mommy! Mommy! Guess what! Guess what!" Maria exclaimed running out of her classroom door towards Liv.
"'Hi, Mama. How was your day?' 'It was great, Sweetie. Did you have a good day at school?'" Olivia smiled as she made up a conversation that never happened in a sarcastic tone.
Maria looked at her confused, had her mommy gone crazy? "Mommy?"
Olivia chuckled and shook her head dismissively. "Never mind, Baby. What were you about to tell me?" She asked as they walked towards her car hand in hand after waving goodbye to Miss Holly.
"Tia's having a sleep over for her birthday this weekend and she asked if I could go. I got an invitation and everything!" Maria yelled in her excitement waving a pink piece of paper in the air.
"That's so cool. I hope you said thank you to her for inviting you?"
"Mhm. I did. She said there's going to be lots of cake and candy and games like musical chairs and hide and go seek and can I please go, Mommy. Please, please, please!" She clasped her little hands together in a begging fashion and jumped up and down on the spot.
Unlocking the car, Liv contemplated her answer. "Hmmmmm. I'm not sure. I'll have to think about it." She replied teasingly knowing that she was going to say yes. She could hardly ever say 'no' to her little girl's whims.
"Please can I go?! I promise I'll behave. All the girls in my class are going." Maria continued to plead even as she climbed into her car seat before Liv strapped her in.
"Well...I guess I would be a bad mommy if I didn't let you go..."
"So I can go?!" The five year old asked in astonishment, her eyes wide with glee. Olivia bit her lip to prevent herself from laughing, wanting to keep up her straight laced facade, before nodding in response. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Maria rushed out as she wrapped her arms around her mother's neck to express her gratefulness, just in case Liv wasn't already aware of it.
Olivia climbed into the drivers seat and turned to look back at Maria who was still beaming and practically vibrating with energy. "I guess our next stop should be the toy store." She stated.
Maria tilted her head in curiosity. "Why?" She inquired.
"Well you can't possibly turn up to a birthday party for your best friend without buying her a present!" Olivia explained the reason for their impromptu after-school outing.
"Can I pick the present?"
"You sure can, Baby Doll and if you promise to be good and eat all your dinner tonight I might even let you pick out a little something for yourself." Olivia knew that she shouldn't spoil her daughter but she just couldn't help herself. She was pretty sure that Maria had gone without even the most basic necessities her whole life up until Liv had met and inevitably saved her. So if she wanted to give her treats every now and then for no reason at all, that was her own business and no one else's.
"Oh, I promise. I'll even help you with the dishes if you want!" Maria exclaimed as Olivia started the car up and began to head in the direction of the toy store that was a few blocks away from their home.
"Mommy, I like this one." Maria stated as she showed Olivia a toy cash register complete with plastic groceries and pretend money.
"You do? Well, do you think Tia will like it? It is her birthday after all." Olivia asked in order to make sure Maria wasn't just picking out the gift because she fancied it for herself.
Maria nodded her head to show that she was positive her friend would enjoy the toy set she held in her hands. "And its pink and purple. They're her favourite colours!"
Olivia inspected the box and realised it had the bonus of being a somewhat educational toy. Then she looked at the cost of it and smiled when took note of that fact that the price was fair, not that money was a problem. She just didn't want to offend Tia's parents with something that was expensive. Liv barely knew the other school mom's due to always being in a hurry to get to work, sometimes before and after school had finished depending on her workload. Therefore she wasn't aware if Tia's family had any financial issues, or lack thereof. Call her paranoid but she was still relatively new at being a mother.
"I guess this is ok. Good job, Maria." Olivia placed the toy in the basket that was resting on her arm before looking around the toy store. "Have you seen anything you might like?" She asked, looking down at the child who stood next to her. Maria shook her head and sighed. "Ok, don't worry. We've got time to keep looking. I'm sure we'll find something."
They carried on walking up and down the aisles until Maria stopped abruptly and tugged on the sleeve of Liv's jacket. "Mommy, what's that?" She asked pointing over to the shelf directly in front of her.
Olivia frowned and picked up the item to inspect it and then smiled. "It looks like a jewellery making kit. It comes with beads in all different shapes and colours and lots of string for you to put the beads on." She explained.
Maria looked at the box and smiled. "Wow! The beads are so pretty. Can I have this one, Mama? I promise to make you a pretty bracelet?"
Liv smiled and responded right away. "Of course but you have to promise to only play with it at the dining room table. I don't want to be finding these beads all around the apartment." She warned.
"Only at the table. Got it." Olivia laughed at the serious look on Maria's face. It made her look as if though she had just made an important business deal. "Thank you." Little arms wrapped around her waist and Olivia returned the gesture before the two of them made their way over to the checkout.
"Ok so I've put your favourite pink pyjamas and stuffie in your backpack. Have you finished picking out your outfit for tomorrow?" Olivia called over her shoulder from where she was stood by the side of Maria's princess bed. After not receiving a response for several seconds, Liv turned to look over at where her daughter was staring, motionless, into her closet. Maria's head was bowed slightly, a sign that there was something bothering her. "Maria? Sweetie, what's wrong?" The concerned mother asked as she sat down on the bed. The child shrugged and mumbled incoherently. "Come sit down by me, Baby. I can't hear you from over there if you're going to mumble like that."
Maria slowly trudged over to Olivia and instead of sitting down next to her, she climbed up into her mothers lap and began to play with the necklace that was always around Liv's neck. "Maria, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's bothering you." The older brunette said when the child still did not express her thoughts.
"I'm scared, Mommy." Maria whispered as she continued to play with the gold object.
"Scared? Of what?" Olivia frowned in confusion and lifted Maria's head so she could talk to her properly instead of the top on her head.
Maria sighed and released the pendant she had been fiddling with. "I'm scared about staying at Tia's house. What if I have a nightmare? You won't be there to help me. Or...or what if I have another accident? The other kids will tease me and think that I'm a baby."
"Oh, Honey." Olivia breathed out and wrapped her arms around Maria comfortingly. "You know, I still remember my first sleep over?"
"You do?"
"Yep and do you know what I remember?" Maria shook her head at her mother's question and shrugged her shoulders. "All I remember is that I had so much fun with my friends and ate lots and lots of...candy!" Olivia had started a tickle fight as soon as she started saying the word 'candy', prompting the five year old in her lap to burst into giggles.
When they both became out of breath from laughing too much, Olivia gave up her 'attack'. "So...you didn't miss your mommy? Not even a little bit?" Maria asked curiously.
Olivia shook her head in the negative and swallowed the lump in her throat at the mention of her mother. "Not even a little bit." It wad true and she knew it sounded strange. What child wouldn't miss their mother the first night away from their home? Unless that mother happened to be an alcoholic who often verbally attacked said child after one two many beverages. No, Olivia certainly didn't miss her mother at any time during her first night away from her. In fact, Serena had to drag six year old Olivia out of her friends house kicking and screaming the next morning, much to the senior Benson's embarrassment and the other parents confusion.
"Well, I still think that I'm going to miss you. You're the best mommy in the whole wide world." Maria proclaimed proudly.
"Awww, thank you, Baby Girl." Olivia cooed as she pulled Maria tighter toward her torso. "So you still want to go to Tia's birthday sleep over?"
"Yep but...if I get scared can I ask Tia's mama to call you?"
"Of course you can and if you want to come home at any point just let Tia's mommy know so she can get me to come and collect you." Liv stated.
The two sat together on the bed for a couple more minutes before Maria began to squirm in Olivia's lap. When she wasn't released straight away, she looked up at her mother who looked deep in thought. "Mommy?"
"Huh? What is it, Kiddo?" Olivia asked. She had become lost in her own thoughts about her mother. It was strange how she could go months without thinking about her but then as soon as the subject came up, she often couldn't get her mind off of the woman for days, sometimes weeks.
"I still need to chose my outfit for tomorrow." Maria explained. "Can you put me down?"
"Oh sorry, Sweetheart. Mommy was having one of her thinking moments." Olivia explained her mental absence before releasing the girl from her grip.
The bed sheets were once again torn from Elliot's body for what seemed like the tenth time. It was not even two am and he had been trying to get some sleep for about three hours but as soon as he was about to nod off, he was jerked awake by Olivia's sudden bouts of tossing and turning. El sat up and rested against the headboard before reaching over and turning on the bedside lamp. The sudden brightness made both himself and his girlfriend squint in order to help their eyes adjust to the light that flooded the room.
"What the Hell, Elliot?" Olivia whisper yelled as she too sat up and turned to face him.
"Well I can't sleep with all your fidgeting so I thought I might as well do an all nighter." He shrugged nonchalantly. "You're worried about her, aren't you?" El asked when she didn't respond to his little joke – not even to scold him for his sarcasm.
"I'm sorry, El. I've ruined our whole evening. Our first night alone together as a couple and all I've done is talk about Maria and keep you awake all night." Olivia said disheartened, looking down at her lap where she was wringing her hands together due to her anxiety.
Elliot sighed and took one of her hands into his own to prevent her from rubbing them red raw. "You told Tia's mother to call if there were any problems, right?" He double checked.
"Yes but I didn't think there would be so many kids there. Maria's still shy and plus she's tiny. What if Tia's mom didn't notice her at all throughout the evening? What if my little girl was sat in a corner somewhere in the house crying out for me? What if she has a nightmare or a-"
Elliot quickly stopped her from continuing when Olivia's breathing became laboured. He was sure she was on the verge of having a panic attack. "Shhh. I'm sure none of that is true. Besides, Maria hasn't had a nightmare or an accident in weeks. She's come a long way since the adoption was finalised."
Olivia sighed before scooting closer into his side and resting her head on his bare chest. "I know but I'm a mother and I can't help but worry." She admitted.
Elliot chuckled and placed a kiss on her forehead. "You're a wonderful mother, Liv. You should be proud about how much you've helped that little girl of yours. She's so much braver now than when we first met her. I'm sure she's fine."
"Hmm. I suppose you're right." Olivia shrugged and snuggled further into him. Suddenly feeling wiped out.
"Aren't I always?" El quipped back and Olivia sharply looked up at him with a raised eyebrow as if to say 'really?!'. "On second thoughts, don't answer that." They both chuckled before agreeing between them that it was time to turn off the lamp and attempt to get some sleep.
Meanwhile at her friends house, Maria was tucked snugly into her sleeping bag - fast asleep. She had so much fun at the party and despite the fact that she had eaten her body weight in sugar, she was sleeping peacefully. No nightmares. No bladder mishaps. She was totally unaware of her mother's worry and couldn't wait to tell Olivia about the amazing time that she had at her first ever sleepover.