Disclaimer: I don't own the hp books.
Wanting to be happy is not the worst thing in the world, but wanting it badly enough to make us depressed is.
John Washington
Pansy was 6 when it first started.
Sure, she knew that her mother was a very strict pureblood but she had not even thought in her wildest dreams that she would ever hit her.
She was sitting on a stool, maintaining perfect posture which was highly unusual for a 6-year-old girl, while a strict and aristocratic-looking woman ranted on about pureblood customs.
" Any mudblood is far below us purebloods and shall be treated as such."
The six-year-old questioned innocently-" but why ma'am? Aren't they witches and wizards too? Why should we think low of them?"
The lady became furious and the six year old cowered under her glare, probably wondering what she did wrong. She checked her posture and straightened her clothes and looked confidently at the lady.
Before pansy could even blink, a hand came hard upon her cheek and woman stated angrily-" How dare you! Defending mudbloods! Such disgrace in my family! Do not ever say that again!
It's my mercy that I am not reporting you to your father but one more disgusting word and I won't hesitate.
The little girl began sobbing quietly while she clutched her cheek and muttered shakily-" O-of cour-course ma'am"
But it seemed like the girl's mother was still angry as she shook her violently." Stop crying! You are ruining the carpet! And don't even get me started on your posture!
One more sob and you will regret that you were ever born."
The girl continued sobbing and now it looked like the woman was fed up and she slapped her hard."Now, pansy what did mistress tell you about posture?"
The girl somehow managed to sit upright but there were still tears in her eyes, which she was too afraid to shed. There was a nasty red mark of five fingers on her cheek and her face wore an expression that no 6 years old should ever do. It was hurt, pain and fear.
Let me tell you, I am not talking about the expression kids wear while throwing tantrums . no, this one was not that.
It was an expression in which the girl was trying not to show her pain and fear and was clearly biting her lips so that the sob would not come.
She was terrified.
The woman smirked when she saw her fear and said sternly-" Tell me! What did I tell you about posture?
She looked at her with watery eyes that could melt the hardest hearts but the woman seemed unfazed.
"T-that we sh-should sit up-upright with correct posture all the t-time." The little girl said shakily, afraid of her mother.
The woman nodded satisfied-" Hmm, good. Now don't be such a whiny kid and memorise the table manners book I gave you."
Pansy nodded, eager to look herself into her toom and leave the company of her mother. She quickly stood up with such a grace that couldn't even be mastered by many grown-up women and started walking towards her room.
As soon as she was out of her mother's line of sight, she ran off hurriedly so that she could shed all those tears that were bottled up inside her.
##
Pansy was 10 when she met her father for the first time.
In the whole ten years of her existence, she had been told many things about her father but it was the first time she was going to see him. In her heart, she held the hope that maybe her father was better than her mother? Maybe, he would love her and give her the childhood she deserved?
But deep down, even she knew that these were all false hopes. If her father really was that good, why would he marry someone like her mother ? If he was good, he would have stopped the hitting sooner, right?
So she knew that her father was just as bad as her mother and if what her mother says is true, he is even worse.
She nervously fiddled with the hem of her robes, a habit she had picked up over the years.
Pansy was wearing an emerald green
dress with her hair cut in a short bob and her makeup perfect as it should be. Her mother stood at her side and turned to face her.
" Pansy, please don't mess this up. Jut nod and do as you're told."
For a moment she saw fear flash in her mother's eyes as if she had gone through the same thing but when she looked back at her mother's stern gaze, she concluded that maybe she had imagined it.
The bronze doors opened to reveal a man dressed in rich pureblood robes, sitting on a chair with his hands on an intricately carved table.
The table depicted scenes of misery and torture of muggles by pureblood wizards which sent shivers up the girl's spine.
The girl timidly looked up to face him and his face twisted into a smile.
Mind you, I am not talking about the type of smile normal dads give their kids. No, I am talking the type of cruel smile the butcher gives the chicken before slaughtering it. The type of smile the kidnapper gives the child before kidnapping him.
She looked terrified when she saw his smile and said fearfully-" Hello, father."
"Hello to you too, my daughter."
His father got up and started to walk toward her with his robes swishing behind.
He knelt so they were at the same level and looked at her right in the eye."What do you want to do when you grow up, Pansy?"
She inched herself away and recited the answer which her mother had made her memorise by heart in the past few days." Bring honour to the Parkinson and become a part of the dark lord's honourable goal."
He smiled at his child and then said-" I mean, how would you do that?"
Now, that was an uncalled question her mother had told her nothing about. So, she decided to answer what she thought would bring honour to her family." I will become an intelligent and hardworking witch and will achieve success."
Her father's happy mood vanished in a flash like it's never been there for the first time. He shouted frustratedly-" NO, NO!
The girl got it all wrong!"
He shook her harshly by her shoulders and looked at her right in the eye." Listen here, girl. You are a pureblood witch. You are only meant to marry in a pureblood family and bear children."
She nodded her head frightenedly."Yes sir."
He nodded, satisfied."Now, pansy let me ask you a question. In which pureblood family would you marry?"
Pansy looked thoughtful and tapped her chin while recalling all the names of boys she had met on the dinner the day before.
" hmm, there are the nott family, Malfoy family, Greengrass family, Avery family-"
Her list was cut off when her father held up a hand and she immediately stopped talking.
" No, I am asking which family would you marry in? Let me tell you, your only goal should be to marry in the Malfoys"
The girl scrunched her face in hate. " Malfoy? But Theo looked and acted much better with me. Malfoy didn't even look at me." She muttered the last part under her breath although she got the impression her father heard it nonetheless.
She looked up to see her father was furious while glaring at her. He slapped her, hard and she almost fell dom on the floor but regained her posture after getting up like a person who had gone through this many time.
Her father smirked when she saw the 5
Fingermark on her cheek." Now, let's do this again, shall we? Who will you marry?"
The gurl quietly said between sobs-" D-Draco Mal-Malfoy."
"Good. now, Fidelia gets this whiny girl out if my presence."
The girl's mother nodded and dragged the girl out of the room while pansy quietly sobbed while clutching her cheek.