Chapter 1

Sonic Goes Solar and Shadow Orders a Cup of Coffee

Dr. Eggman sat down at his computer with his coffee and laughed maniacally. He was in quite a jovial mood as he was about to witness his most evil scheme to thwart Sonic the Hedgehog come to fruition.

Eggman sipped his coffee and grinned. "Ah… Palmtree Panic is my favorite blend. It really wakes me up and it tastes like the good old days." He threw the coffee mug aside. "Alright, now that the advertisement's over let's get to work. Orbot! Cubot!"

Orbot and Cubot followed him, anticipating another failure while feigning a weak optimistic attitude.

"You seem to be in high spirits, boss." said Orbot. "Perhaps this would be an adequate time to ask for a raise?"

"Yeah, I haven't seen you this happy since you beat Sonic and woke up." said Cubot.

"Well soon that dream will become a reality, for I've allied myself with the evilest association in the world second only to Eggman Industries—the power company." He indicated his monitor. "We all know Sonic has a bad habit of getting glued to the tube, so I hacked into his TV and made it demand five times the amount of electricity of a normal one. Now his bills are due today and he'll have to take out a loan just to pay off his power bill and avoid the late fees."

"Wow! That is evil." said Cubot. "You could get sued."

"Be quiet!" he shouted. "I'm not going to let anything spoil my mood. Sonic's about to experience the harsh realities of home ownership, and nothing short of a foreclosure can save him."

Sonic came rushing into Tails' workshop with that morose disposition that only accompanies disgruntled homeowners.

"Tails, something's messed up. My electric bill just went up 500%, but the only thing that uses electricity in my house is the TV."

Tails floated down from his plane and swiped away the bill. "It says here you watched twenty-eight hours of TV a day. How is that even possible?"

"You know how they have Comedy Chimp marathons every Sunday? Well, sometimes I'll run around the world so fast that it starts spinning in the opposite direction so I can watch more episodes."

"Then that means Sticks wasn't being crazy when she said she saw the sun rise in the west. I'll have to apologize to her later. So, what do you want me to do about this bill?"

"Oh, it's nothing major—just what any good buddy would do for a friend in need. I want you to put solar panels on my thatched roof so I can watch all the TV I want."

"But Sonic, I thought you had a 'no metal' policy? You know, because your aesthetic has to be the exact opposite of Eggman's."

"Yeah, like I'd sacrifice my TV time just to please the fans. So, when can you get those solar panels up?"

"Well, I'll have to make a few calculations to see how many it would take to run your TV, but we were all gonna go out to Meh Burger for lunch. Wanna come?"
"No! I can't afford to eat out. I've got a $400 bill to pay and if it's not postmarked by tomorrow, I'll have to pay late fees." He grabbed Tails by the shoulders. "And I'm never late."

"Then why don't you liquidate your rings?"

"No way, man! I'm saving those for the next time I take Amy to Casino Night Zone."

"Well, let's talk it over at Meh Burger. Maybe everyone'll cash in a little to help you out."

Sonic's eyes lit up. "Thanks, Tails. You're the best."

"Hey, I didn't make any promises."

Tails took the bankrupt blue blur to Meh Burger where Amy, Knuckles, and Sticks were waiting with no great deal of patience at a modest, particle board table.

"What took you so long?" demanded Amy. "We've been waiting for over an hour. It's not like our food is ready yet, but still."

Sonic sighed and gripped the edge of the table. "Sorry, gang, but this hedgehog's fallen on hard times. My electric bill went up 500% and I haven't been using my TV any more than I normally do. Something's up and I know Eggman's behind it, but I don't have time to stop him because if I don't postmark this bill by tomorrow, I'll have to pay late fees. And if Sonic the Hedgehog's late, Eggman wins."

Amy sighed and took Sonic's hand. It's alright, Sonic. We all have to pay a late fee every once in a while. That's just part of owning a home.

"Unless you're like me and you don't have a permanent address." said Sticks.

"Well, yeah, that's something you normal people have to put up with, but I'm the hero. I'm not supposed to deal with mundane financial problems."

"Why don't you call that financial consultant who's always on the radio?" Knuckles suggested. "Dave the Ram! I hear he's pretty good."

"No, I don't have time for that." Sonic let his head fall on the table. "I didn't want to do this, but I have no choice. Sorry, Ames. I've gotta cash in my rings."

Amy gasped. "But what about the couples' discount at Casino Night Zone?"

The patrons of Meh Burger all shot critical glances at Amy.

"I mean that's something you could spend your rings on if we just happened to be in the neighborhood and we were old enough to gamble. Heh heh…"

Knuckles grabbed Sonic by the shoulder. "Wait! I know how to save your rings and get you free electricity. We'll put a lightning rod on your thatched roof!"

"Knuckles, that'll burn my house down!"

Sticks grabbed his other shoulder. "And then you can use the insurance money to build your own power plant and give people electricity for free because you're not a greedy corporate fat cat."

Tails pushed them both back into their seats. "Those are terrible ideas. I'm already working on a long-term fix by designing some solar panels. Sonic's just hung up on the late fee, but he'll get over it."

Amy clasped her hands together. "Maybe we should take this opportunity to all go solar. It could really help reduce our carbon footprints."

Sticks crossed her arms and glanced skeptically at Amy. "I don't use electricity, so I don't leave behind a carbon footprint. I don't leave behind any footprints! Those government goons'll never find my bunker where I tinker with all my deactivated land mines."

"Why don't you guys go green by handing over a hundred bucks each so I can pay off this bill right now?" Sonic asked, holding out his hand.

"But the bill was $400." Tails said with a sidelong glance at Sonic. "You wouldn't be paying anything."

"Yeah, what's your point?"

Amy screamed and nearly flipped out of her chair. "Look, guys! It's Shadow! What's he doing at Meh Burger?"

Surely enough, it was Shadow the Hedgehog. He glared at the restaurant's patrons with disgust and walked up to the lunch counter, taking care not to step in any of the spills.

Knuckles leaned over to Sonic. "Don't look now, but I think one of the fans made another recolor of you, and it's coming this way."

"Knuckles, that's Shadow." Sonic said with a satisfied smirk.

"Oh, right…"

Shadow approached Dave the Intern who stood behind the register, his apathetic stare unwavering beneath the hedgehog's fearsome gaze.

Shadow slammed his fist on the counter. "Give me a coffee. No cream, no sugar. And make it fast. My private helicopter's waiting to take me to my hotel in Casino Night Zone."

Dave rolled his eyes. "We don't sell coffee here. Go brew it yourself."

Shadow clenched his fists. "You don't sell coffee? And you call this place a restaurant?"

"Actually, we like to call it an open-air café. It looks good on brochures. Is that all you want because my shift ended four seconds ago, so I'm not getting paid to talk to you anymore."

Shadow threw his hands in the air. "This is a travesty! I'm going to open my own coffee shop in this village and run you out of business."

"Do you really think that would work? We'd be pulling from separate customer bases."

"You better not make me your enemy, boy. I've got people who could ruin you."

"Oh, I'm so scared! It's not like I don't face this kind of verbal abuse from my mom's boyfriend every day."

"Hmph!" Shadow scoffed at Dave and walked away.

Before leaving the mediocre establishment, he stopped at Sonic's table and held out a wad of one hundred-dollar bills. "I couldn't help but overhear you whining about your power bill, Sonic. I'm sure this is more than enough but take it." He tossed the wad of cash on the table and walked away. "But remember this. A real man keeps his house in order."

Sonic clawed at the table and clenched his teeth, paying no attention to the roll of bills.

"Wow!" Knuckles exclaimed. "A random stranger just gave you $5,000. You should take it to the bank."

"I don't trust Shadow." said Sticks. "That money's gotta be counterfeit."

Amy chuckled lightly. "Shadow framing Sonic for a crime? Come on, Sticks. That's so early 2000s."

Tails grabbed the wad of cash and flipped through it. "Nope. It's all real. How could Shadow throw away $5,000 and why would he bring all this money to Meh Burger?"

Knuckles shrugged. "Well, he likes to throw everything away. Haven't you heard his theme song?"

Sticks jumped on the table, knocking their food into the floor. "Maybe he's a hitman, or he robbed a bank, or he's a ringleader in the black market! No, wait. It can't be… He must've befriended a wealthy investor and forged his will, leaving him with all his money when the old man wanted to give it all to charity!"

Sticks jumped off the table and ran away screaming unintelligibly.

Sonic snatched the wad of cash from Tails' hand. "I don't care where this money came from. It's gonna save me from paying a late fee. Oh, but don't forget about those solar panels, Tails. You know, carbon footprint and all that."

"Fine. I'll get right on it…"