Chapter 4: Nothing

There was nothing.

Nothing to see.

Nothing to feel.

No thoughts to think.

There once existed a facsimile of these things, a brief distraction from the yawning void within, but this was only a delusion. Simple madness to mask what was always lurking just beneath the surface.

Beneath blue spines and speed like the wind.

Beneath the attitude.

Beneath the ideals he held himself to.

Yet, in the facsimile, the simulation, he imagined himself being asked to be something that did not exist. In the face of annihilation, what is he?

He isn't.

Something stirs.

What is there to go back to?

A flitter of motion.

What is there other than death?

Dancing patterns of light.

Maybe, there is one thing left to do?

Faint sounds, slowly growing louder.

He will return here. It is only a matter of time.

Sonic opens his eyes.

A splitting headache pierces his head as if a stake were driven through it. The light burns his eyes but he looks anyway, holding his forehead tight with his right hand. Slowly, painfully, his eyes adjust to the glaring sunlight. Sonic's gaze flits back and forth as he assesses his surroundings. He remembers a child, a red wolf. He remembers Ivory shouting.

Ivory stands in front of him, glowing light blue, her light enveloping the small red wolf, pinning them against the truck's ramp. The child shouts, desperate.

"Stop it! You and everyone need to come back!" they yelp at Ivory. "Don't you see they're going to punish us! I don't want to be punished again. Please!"

A metallic clanking sound grows louder and louder. Something is approaching, and it's big. Sonic lifts himself up, managing to place a foot onto the ground. His stomach twists, acid burns at his throat. The child writhes and screams incoherently, tears streaming down their face, soaking into their collar. Ivory shudders, and her blue aura flickers. She's struggling. Sonic doesn't know how much longer she can keep it up.

Sonic stands up, wobbling with dizziness and the pain in his joints. The surrounding area has been blanketed in shadow. He looks up. A disk shaped machine looms above, teetering on spindly spider-like limbs. It raises a leg to attack. Sonic tries to take a running stance, thinking out the best way to grab Ivory and leave, but his mind is a jumble and he can barely stand. The leg tears downwards, Sonic tries to sidestep, but he stumbles.

"I've got you!" a familiar voice shouts from above.

There's a flash of pink, and a hard shove against Sonic's chest. He flies backwards, tumbling off the bridge. He braces himself for the shock of cold water, but it never comes. Sonic thuds against something metal and round, he starts to slip off the side, but he manages to grab onto a railing and pull himself up. Shaking the last vestiges of unconsciousness from his mind, he looks around.

He stands atop a metal tube, just surfaced above the water, a submarine about the size of a large bus. A figure drops in front of him wearing combat boots and an olive jacket, carrying Ivory bridal-style. Ivory stares at her savior with wide sparkling eyes and a luminescent blush.

"Amy!" Ivory shouts.

"Oh, Ivory! I'm so glad we found you. It's wonderful that you're okay!"

"Amy?" Sonic shouts.

The pink hedgehog looks in Sonic's direction and lowers her eyes in recognition.

"Oh. Sonic. Long time no see ," Amy says dryly.

Ivory squeezes Amy, burying her face into her neck. Amy pats her head. Sonic's head spins.

"Alright, come on, both of you."

Amy puts Ivory down and yanks open the submarine's hatch, climbing down the ladder. Ivory follows quickly. Sonic, still confused, and a little put off by the idea of going underwater, climbs down after her. Two men carrying an unconscious wolf child follow shortly after him, and the hatch creaks closed.

"Amy? What are you doing here? You know Ivory? I thought you were in Blaze's dimension for Sol Day?"

"Sol Day was two months ago, Sonic."

Rubber soles thud against the metal floor. The interior of the craft smells like sweat and rusted metal. A few people scurry about the narrow corridors, manning the equipment and chattering urgently. The space closes in on Sonic, the dark blue outside the portholes wavers sickeningly with streaks of dull light. Metal creaks as the whole thing gently sways with the tide. Sonic shudders.

"Amy, you know him ?" Ivory points at Sonic.

"Oh yeah, we're old friends. We're close, I thought."

Amy's tone makes Sonic feel like he's done something wrong. He tries to remember their last interaction, but he can't make out the details. Sonic shakes his head and turns his attention back to the current situation.

"I'm still confused, Ames."

"I'm confused, too. Why are you here, Sonic? Isn't Tails hosting a holiday party?"

"My flight connected here, then it got delayed, then I ran into her ."

Ivory gives him a look. Amy turns towards the front of the ship.

"We're clear to set off," she shouts.

"Preparing for descent!" A man announces. "Dive! Dive!"

A klaxon blares, and slowly the submarine lowers down further beneath the water. Sonic's stomach rises, he takes deep breaths, trying to keep it together. Sonic has gone underwater when he's had to, but after many near-drownings he's become somewhat wary of the experience. Ivory, seemingly unconcerned with the ocean's pressure creaking at the hull of the craft, is still gazing longingly at Amy. She's smiling. Sonic has not seen her smile once up to this point. Smirking, sure, but smiling? Amy turns back to Sonic.

"I wanted to do something alone this year after what happened during my visit to Blaze," Amy looks a bit down, but continues, "so I asked my cards where I should go, I ended up here. Then, the democratically elected Prime Minister was deposed in a military-backed coup. I worked with a bunch of people here during The Restoration, and they needed my help resisting the coup, so I'm helping. Y'know, spreading the love."

Some of the confusion is satiated, but Sonic takes a moment to process all of the information she just dumped. She'd been having an adventure of her own it seems. Sonic wonders what happened with Blaze, whatever it was seems to have Amy in a mood. She puts an arm around Ivory. Ivory holds her breath.

"I helped rescue a bunch of kids from these weird labs, including this lil' cutie."

"Who, her?" Sonic folds his arms, an eyebrow raised. Ivory sticks her tongue out.

"Don't worry, Sonic wouldn't recognize cute if it hit him on the head with a hammer," Amy says. Ivory smiles, then, as if remembering something, stares at her shoes.

"Amy, I— I thought you died."

"Aw…" Amy bends down and pulls Ivory into a gentle embrace, stroking the top of her head. "You poor thing. I'm here now, I only got a bit scraped up."

Still holding Ivory, Amy again turns to Sonic.

"We were transporting a bunch of kids we rescued, but we were attacked, and Ivory got separated from the rest of the group." Amy turns back to Ivory. "I guess the last you saw of me was when I fell off of that cliff."

Sonic blinks.

"I'm glad you're alright, Amy," Sonic says.

Amy gives him a look, before shrugging.

"Thanks."

There's a long pause after his awkward little bit of sentimentality, nobody really sure what to say. Sonic glances at Ivory, who is leaning into Amy's shoulder and red in the cheeks, seemingly in a daze. He smirks. Sonic bends closer to Ivory, his hand at the side of his mouth as he lowers his voice a little.

"She's too old for you y'know, Ives."

Ivory's eyes widen as her entire face turns beet red, then her eyes narrow in a split second. She yelps a series of squeaky half-words while flailing her fists against Sonic's head. He snorts, giggling at her flustered expressions. Amy watches their exchange with her arms crossed, unamused.

"Ivory," Amy says, each word dripping with honey, "If you walk to your left, you'll eventually come to the kitchen, why don't you ask Harris there to get you a hot drink, Amy's orders. I need to speak to Sonic alone ."

Ivory nods, scurrying off. Sonic doesn't like how Amy said ' Alone .'

Amy grabs Sonic's wrist and hauls him away, through a door and into a small office with a desk built into the wall. Neat piles of paper are secured to the desk, as is a touch-screen display of some sort. Amy closes the door behind them, locking it. Sonic backs up.

"Amy, sorry about the joke—"

"I don't care about that, Sonic. It was useful cover."

"Cover?"

Amy exhales, leaning against the desk.

"I'm worried about you, Sonic. I didn't want to mention it in front of Ivory, she has plenty already on her mind."

Sonic's brow furrows and his pupils contract. He forces himself into a more neutral expression, shrugging. He knows Amy can read him better than just about anyone, he doesn't want to slip up. He doesn't want her to see him like that.

"What's there to worry about?"

"I haven't heard from you at all in almost a year. I spoke to Knuckles recently, he hadn't heard from you in a while, nor had anyone else I've spoken to."

"What's wrong with wanting to be alone sometimes? You just said—"

"You know that's not what I mean. You normally seem to at least make some effort, but this past year… When was the last time you spoke to your sibling ?"

"Just today!"

"Well, at least they know you're alive. Did you call because you wanted to actually talk to Tails, or because you needed something?"

Sonic doesn't reply. He already knows she can tell the answer from his body language. Amy rubs the bridge of her nose. She hangs her head and sighs deeply.

"Sonic, I care about you deeply. If there's something going on, I'm always here to listen."

Sonic looks down. Why was she pressing him so much on this? He's disappeared before. What changed?

"Tails didn't tell you about…" Sonic mutters. "No, no, they wouldn't." Sonic feels guilty that he had even a momentary doubt in Tails' doctor-patient-sibling confidentiality.

"Tell me about what?"

"It's nothing. I'm fine, I've just wanted time to myself lately."

Amy reaches her hand out slightly, almost reflexively. His stomach churns. Doesn't she get that he can't talk about it, that even thinking about it makes him feel unbearably empty?

"I can tell, Sonic. Something's wrong."

"I told you, it's nothing!" Sonic shouts, slamming his fist against the wall.

Amy draws her hand back, staring at him with wide, fearful eyes. That look in her eyes tells him she's not afraid of him, but for him, she looks at him like he might hurt himself. Sonic turns away, hiding his face. He hurriedly wipes a stray tear from his cheek. He clears his throat.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have snapped." Sonic still can't bring himself to look at her. He tries to laugh, but it comes out hollow. "That was weird, I don't know what came over me."

He feels a warmth at his back. Amy's arms are wrapped around his chest. He stiffens, but he doesn't fight it either.

"I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have pushed. You don't have to talk about it if you're not up to it. I guess I'm still kind of figuring out boundaries."

Amy pulls away. He turns to face her, she's smiling gently.

"Why don't you get some rest? It will be a few hours before we reach Isle North."

Sonic nods.

"I'll show you to the living quarters," Amy says, opening the door again. Sonic follows her through.

Amy leads him into a dim room lined with about six bunk beds, three on opposing walls. It's quieter there thanks to the pillows and padding on the walls. It still doesn't feel like the most enticing of living spaces.

"Thanks, Amy," Sonic whispers.

"It's no problem."

As Amy leaves him, Sonic collapses onto a small bunk bed. It's harder and more cramped and smells worse than the motel room, but he can hardly move from exhaustion. Soon, fitful sleep overtakes him, casting his consciousness into repetitive dreams of medical tests, of endless voids, of friends just out of reach. The dreams pass, and he finally drifts into a comfortable unawareness.