"You sure about this?" Sam asks me, not for the first time today. The answer remains the same; no, but I'm doing it anyway.
We're back at the warded cabin and we picked up a few witchy supplies along the way to perform the ritual to unlock my powers.
Placed on the small wooden table out on the front porch are several particularly creepy ingredients including animal blood and human teeth.
"Let's just get this over with," I say, trying to speed the process up. Sam looks back down at the grimoire he's holding as Dean picks up a knife. Reluctantly, I give him my hand and turn my head away, looking at Cas in the corner of the veranda. The cool metal of the blade presses against the skin of my palm and then pierces it. I wince as Dean slices my hand open and lets my blood drip into a glass jar.
He puts the jar down and grabs a rag, tying it around my throbbing hand. Holy crap, that actually really hurts. I cradle my hand to my chest.
"The sun's going down. We gotta do this now. Light the candles," Sam instructs. Dean pulls out his lighter but before he can flick it open, the various candles come aflame. We all look at Cas briefly, whose hand is slightly raised. "Ok, Darcy pick up the jar," Sam tells me and I do so, with my good hand. "Ready?" Sam gives me a meaningful look. I don't know what kind of person I'll be as a psychic, but I do know that this is necessary. This is what I have to do.
I nod.
Sam begins to read out a verse in Latin. He picks up a few ingredients and puts them into the jar in my hand as he speaks, until finally he places the book down and says, "Drink it."
I lift it up to my mouth. God, it smells awful. Eyes pinched shut, I gulp it down, nearly gagging as I do so. When I'm finished, I bang the jar back on the table.
"That was disgusting," I declare. I think about the fact that a similar blend, aimed to repress my powers rather than reignite them, would have been mixed into some of the cookies that I ate when I was younger from Mrs Dahlia. It's an unsettling thought.
"How do you feel?" Dean asks.
I let myself breathe for a moment, then shrug. "The same, I guess. Do you think it worked?"
"Let's hope so, 'cause this is all we got," Sam says.
"Maybe it'll take a few days to kick in," Dean suggests.
I nod. "Yeah, maybe—"
A sudden rush of emotions rocket through me, like a freight train smashing me to smithereens. I double over, crying out, my head burning like the worst migraine in the world. I see flashes of all different things; faces, animals, large crowds, buildings, waterfalls. It all rushes through me, drowning me as it goes. I feel hands grab me and support me so I don't fall over, but I'm too busy writhing in pain to take notice.
The flashing images and growing voices overwhelm me until I feel two fingers press to my forehead and everything goes black.
~O~
In the deep shadows of a dimly lit room, a lone figure towers in the corner. He's shrouded in darkness, only the very faint outline of his looming shape visible. Suddenly, his eyes pop open and glow a horrifying, blood red.
~O~
I gasp awake, scrabbling at the sheets around me, thrashing my legs. Dean quickly comes to my side, grabbing my arms to try and settle me.
"Stop, stop. Darcy, you're fine, you're fine," he holds me until I still, which I do so slowly, looking around the cabin and the bed I'm in.
Everything feels…different. Without even asking, I can tell that Sam is outside, with Cas. I can feel them both, their energies, so near. Dean's energy is particularly bright because he's right next to me, so much so that it overloads my senses and I have to pull away from him.
Even the colours of the room look brighter, like everything suddenly got enhanced to HD.
"You scared us for a minute. Cas had to put you to sleep for a few hours, said your brain was flooding. How do you feel?" Dean asks, sounding cautious.
I shake my head. "I don't—….I don't know. Weird. Confused."
"Sam! Get in here," Dean calls and the door opens. Sam comes inside, Cas standing in the doorway.
If I didn't know better, I'd say he looks worried. Except I do know better now - I can feel it. He's not just worried, he's troubled. And conflicted and uneasy. More scared of the apocalypse than he ever lets on.
It hurts, feeling his emotions, just as I can feel Dean's and Sam's, to a degree. Cas's burn brighter though, even from across the room.
"You ok?" Sam asks, sitting on the edge of my bed.
"It's all so much," I wince. "Everything."
"It'll probably take some getting used to," Dean says. "You're going to be ok though."
It's an empty promise.
"I don't think that's true," I breathe, my hands shaking as I look down at them.
"What do you mean?" Sam asks.
"You saw him…didn't you?" Cas says and our eyes meet.
Sam and Dean exchange a look. "Saw who?"
My chest rises shakily. "Lucifer."
~O~
The sound of birds singing and crickets chirping is mostly drowned out by the loud, running river that's about a fifteen minute walk from the cabin.
It grounds me, as I let my fingers run through the brisk water, sitting by its edge. Being outside is better than in the cramped cabin space. Out here, I feel like I can breathe.
Castiel appears behind me, though I don't turn. He's completely silent, but I can feel that he's there. I'm so much more aware of everything around me now. It's like I was blind before, missing one of my senses. But now I can see and it is beautiful. And also very burdening.
"Where is he, Darcy?" Castiel asks me, for the tenth time since I got my powers back yesterday afternoon.
"I'm not going to say it again," my voice is snappy. "I don't know."
"You saw him. Where was he?"
"I saw a flash of him. A brief glimpse, that was it. I don't know where he is," I insist, looking down at the water.
"But you could find out. You need to seek it out. You need to try," he pushes.
I shake my head.
"Darcy—"
"I don't want to!" I exclaim as I stand up. "When I saw him, the feeling I got…It was terrible. The worst thing I've ever felt. And I feel like when I looked at him…It's like he looked back at me. Like he saw into me."
"I gave you a choice. You chose to unlock your powers. You said it was something you had to do. Now do it," his tone left no room for argument. "Don't forget what's at stake here."
"I haven't," I say, but it comes out weak. I know I'm letting my fear stop me from doing the selfless thing. Sam and Dean talk about it all like it's so easy, like they'd give their life in a second for someone else's, like they could save the world without even breathing. I'm not like them; I'm not a hero. I'm just scared.
I rub my eyes roughly with my hands until I see stars. Fear is a paralysing, horrifying thing. But I need to get over it. There's too much to lose.
My hands drop back down. "Ok. I'll try. But I don't even really know where to start," I say. These powers are still so new, I'm getting used to experiencing life through this lens.
"Close your eyes," Cas instructs and I do. I feel him step closer, warm energy radiating off him. "Now try and recreate the image you saw in your dream of him. Focus on him, recreate the feeling you got."
I picture Lucifer, that intimidating figure, and the feeling of dread and death comes rushing back in an instant.
Flashes of images pop through my head; an empty town, with eerily empty streets. I get a glimpse of a sign and my eyes pop open again.
"Carthage," I breathe. "He's going to be in Carthage."
"In Tunisia, North Africa?" Castiel questions.
"What? No. Missouri," I feel a little woozy, my legs shaking. "I think I need to sit down." I drop into the grass, my head aching. "Why do I feel like this?"
Cas crouches down before me. "What you just did, reaching out to Lucifer, is the human equivalent of running a marathon. It exhausted you, but you'll be fine. And you'll get more used to it the more you do it."
I nod, holding my head in my hands and breathing through my mouth to try and stop the dizziness. I feel a warm hand on my shoulder and I look up. He looks somewhat awkward or unsure, but there's undeniable comfort in his steady reassurance.
"This will get easier," he says and, despite all my doubts and fears, I believe him.
~O~
Bobby Singer is a very abrasive man. I like him. He has a good, solid energy about him that is sturdy and comforting.
His house is cluttered with all kinds of things, from copious amounts of books to empty alcohol bottles and crates of odd objects.
He sits in his wheelchair, behind his desk, and stares at me with suspicious eyes. "This is the supposedly all powerful psychic?" He asks incredulously. "Some coed?"
I frown. Ok, maybe I only kind of like him.
"Well, she got us the location of the Devil. So, as far as I'm concerned, the coed's working out just fine," Dean notes as he cracks open a beer.
"The coed has a name, you know," I mutter.
"Jo and Ellen are on their way," Sam says, slipping his phone into his pocket. "They'll be here soon."
"I don't like getting them involved in this," Dean adds. "It's dangerous."
"We can't go in there just me, you and Cas," Sam points out. "And Bobby can't come and Darcy…"
They all look at me.
I raise my hands. "Deal was; I help you find the Devil, you guys kill him. I'm not good with guns."
Dean takes another swig of his beer. "Typical."
I glare at him.
"Killing Lucifer isn't going to be easy. He won't be alone," Cas says.
"Which is why Jo and Ellen are coming. They'll help us get in there," Sam is the reassuring voice of reason.
~O~
Out in Bobby's junkyard, I look through the masses of broken down cars and rusty, old parts. Jo and Ellen arrived not long ago and they're inside, with the boys. I needed to get away from them. There is a bad feeling in my stomach and I chalk it up to anxiety over the upcoming mission, but…I think it's more than that.
What am I supposed to say? 'Hey guys, I have a bad feeling about you going to meet the Devil tomorrow'? I think a bad feeling is pretty par for the course.
"Bobby wants to get a photograph," Cas says from behind me.
I turn to him, away from the beaten down car I was examining. "Why?"
Cas frowns. "I don't know. Sentimental reasons, I would surmise. Humans are rather sentimental creatures."
Sometimes, it's easy to forget that Cas isn't like us. But then he says odd things like that and I am rudely reminded.
"I'll come inside in a minute," I tell him, toying with a screwdriver on a messy fold out table beside me.
"What is it?" He comes closer and his energy is overwhelming for a moment. I'm still getting used to how different it all feels. Cas's energy is especially vivid, more eminent than anyone else's, including mine. It's like it's seeping out of him, like the vessel he's in can barely contain it.
"Nothing."
"What?" His voice drops, becoming more serious.
I put the screwdriver back and run my hands down my face. "I just have a bad feeling about this whole thing."
"We're going to fight the Devil. I can't imagine that eliciting positive emotions." The lines of his face crease in concentration, like all his attention is honed in on me.
"Yeah, that's what I thought you would say," I let out a big breath, deflating like a balloon.
He comes to stand beside me and we watch the sun melt into the horizon. "It's probable that we'll all perish tomorrow and you'll never see us again. Perhaps that's where the bad feeling is stemming from."
A deprecating, surprised laugh leaves my mouth and I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Yeah. That'd probably be it."
I feel his gaze shift to rest on me. "That's funny?"
"No," I shake my head. "It's definitely not. You're just…" Our eyes meet and his head cocks to the side, awaiting the rest of my answer.
"I'm what?"
"I don't know. Odd. Unexpected."
He seems to take this into consideration as he looks back out to the sky. "I always thought humans were the odd ones. They always seem to react in such unexpected ways. We would think they'd go left, they'd go right. We'd think they would choose one option, but they always went for the other. We've always struggled to predict them, no matter what some of the other angels say."
It's so surreal for me to think that he has been on this Earth for so many hundreds of years. God, the things he must have seen. He's so powerful and enduring, yet he's here, helping us. Standing by our sides, when he could just as easily abandon us and walk away. I think we all under appreciate just how much he's willing to sacrifice for us.
"Cas, if I don't see you again after tomorrow—"
"Hey, you two! Get your asses in here. Bobby won't leave us the hell alone until we get this picture," Dean calls from the porch of the house.
I startle and straighten up.
We head back inside and huddle together in the living room. I slip into place between Sam and Cas.
"Hurry up," Bobby insists, wheeling himself back to us after he's done fidgeting with the camera. "I'm gonna need something to remember your sorry asses by."
"Ha! Always good to have an optimist around," Ellen jokes.
"Bobby's right," Cas says from beside me. "Tomorrow we hunt the Devil. This is our last night on Earth."
Everyone's face sobers and the camera's flash ignites.
~O~
A/N: Hello everyone! The newest chapter is liveeee. I really hope you guys enjoyed this and thank you to those of you who have read this far. I know the beginning of this was slow moving, but there was a bit to set up. The pace will pick up from here.
A VERY big thank you to Franki3Winchester who has been awesome and reviewed all the chapters! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!
Thanks guys, see you soon for the next chapter where Sam, Dean, Cas, Jo and Ellen go to fight the Devil and Darcy and Bobby try to help them out!