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Daenerys
Numb.
That was all Daenerys felt as she stared down at the body of Jon Snow. He laid there, eyes still open, but the life was completely gone. She could hear shouts behind her, crying, but all she could focus on was his face.
It was strange, how death worked. How is it that moments ago, he had been filled with life, talking to Daemon about swords, and now he was nothing. He was a shell. A void. And she was the poor fool who had to stare at it. She was the fool.
She knew exactly why he hadn't killed Daario. He knew that Daario had meant something to her back then – but it had gone wrong. And now, he was gone because of his selflessness, when he should have driven his sword down into the sellsword.
Her eyes were practically blurry from the tears she had cried, but nothing was in pain anymore. She couldn't even feel. The only thing that laid within her was numbness.
She should have let Daario go. She never should have allowed him to stay in the pyramid once Jon arrived. She had known something was going to boil over – but she had thought maybe it wouldn't be as bad. And now, she paid the price.
Her hand shakily came up to his face, before slowly shutting his eyes. That almost made her start to cry more, but as she moved her hand away from his eyes and rested it on his already cold cheeks, emotion started to take over her. One kind she had not felt in a long time.
"Take Daario," she whispers, her head moving up. The sounds of the world began to enter her body again and vision became clearer. "Take him," she repeats, this time louder, the emotion building. "Take him away!" she screams it this time, her hands clinging onto Jon.
"W-"
"I don't care where, just take him out of my sight!" she yells, the rage radiating off of her. "Torture him, burn him, I don't care – just get that murderer out of here!"
The guards nod, now dragging the unconscious and bloody Daario out of the room. Daenerys turns back to Jon, feeling her eyes start to water again. She feels someone lay a hand on her shoulder, and she looks up to see it was Eleana. She had tears in her eyes as well.
"My grace…" she whispers.
Daenerys looks over at her children and suddenly remembered where she was, trying to clear her throat and stop the emotion from leaking through. "Eleana," she states, her voice cracking. "Please bring the children to their chambers. They've seen enough."
"Mother-" Daemon starts but Daenerys shakes her head.
"Please don't fight me on this," she whispers. She could hardly even look at them. How could she have let her own children see the death of their father? She didn't even know what to do. "Please."
Eleana squeezes her shoulder before taking the two children's hands. "Come on…your mother needs to be alone." Dan stares at Daenerys and then down at Jon before following after her, still crying. Daemon was quiet, but she could feel his sadness radiating off of him too. Once Daenerys heard the door close, now that the children were gone, she let her head fall on top of Jon's chest.
She starts to sob, crying for her stupidity, for the loss of his life, for everything. Sobs so powerful they racked her body, dimmed her senses, letting out howls of grief. The fire in the room suddenly lights up brighter as she cries, practically making the tragic chambers glow. After a moment, she moves her face up, her tears still blurring her vision, before a soft voice calls to her.
"My queen."
Daenerys looks up and sees Kinvara standing across from her. She was staring down at Jon's body. A bit of hope started to develop in Daenerys as soon as she looked at the red priestess. "You," she whispers. "You can save him! You can bring him back!"
Kinvara looks at her sadly before kneeling down to her level. "My grace…to bring him back would be…practically impossible with the kind of sorcery I possess."
"Why?" she hisses. Her anger was getting the better of her, her grief. "You brought me back – and he's been brought back before – why can't it happen again? Why?"
"Daenerys, all of your wounds – as well as his – were one entrance. Because Jon's wounds went through his body completely, and there are two entrance ways…there isn't a soul area for the magic to focus on-"
"There has to be something!" Daenerys cries, staring at her. "Anything – please. I'll do anything!"
Kinvara stares at her before looking down at the body. The red priestess sighs before she slowly nods her head. "There is one thing we could try…but you're not going to like it."
"Please," she whispers. "Anything that has the chance…I'll try."
Kinvara stands as a guard comes back into the room. "We have locked the prisoner away," the guard states.
"Good," Kinvara states quietly. "I need you to bring his body to the temple we have." The guard nods and walks over. Daenerys reluctantly lets her hands leave Jon's body, watching as the guard picked him up and moved him away. She slowly stood, her eyes tracing all the blood that was on the ground – a lot of which had made its way onto her dress. Her hands were covered in it. It was almost like a joke for how this had gone.
His blood was actually on her hands. It was her fault.
"C…" She clears her throat as another guard comes in. "Get some of the other handmaidens…clean this up."
The guard nods and leaves to retrieve help, while Daenerys moves her body to where Kinvara was, following her out of the room. Her eyes stayed locked on Jon's body, holding onto that one sliver of hope. It wasn't much at all – even Kinvara didn't think it would work – but Daenerys had to at least try to believe. For her own sanity.
When they had reached the temple, Daenerys watched as the guard lowered Jon's body onto the slate – the very same slate she had been on when she had first woken up in this room – and had just found out she was a mother. Now, seeing Jon here, it felt like everything had gone full circle.
And here she was, trying to bring him back.
"You may go," Kinvara says to the guard. He leaves, bowing to Daenerys before going out of the room. They had designated this one spot of the pyramid for Kinvara to practice her religion – and now, it would finally help them.
At least that was what Daenerys hoped.
"As I said…you're not going to like this," Kinvara says to her gently. "I can use the same technique that I used to bring you back, but because of the severity of the wound, I don't know if it will work. But there is something we can do to make the sorcery stronger – I'm going to need your blood."
Daenerys felt her heart drop. "...blood magic?" she asks.
"Daenerys," Kinvara states gently, coming over to her. "Jon has lost a lot of blood, regardless of the injury or not. There is barely a possibility that the spell alone will work, but if I have the blood of something strong – like the blood of a dragon, something that has even stood up to fire itself – it might be able to restore a part of his consciousness. You've said it yourself – something in your blood changed that day in the flames. It's stronger and more powerful than most. I don't know for sure if it will work, but if you want even a chance of him waking up, I'm going to need it."
She was torn. Every single time she thought of blood magic, her mind instantly thought back to Drogo. How she had trusted that witch, and in turn, she had lost her firstborn, and her husband. Ever since then, she had never trusted the word of anyone who had used blood magic.
But Kinvara had proved ten times over that she was far better skilled than any mage or sorcerer she had met. She had studied this for years, practiced it possibly for centuries…if anyone had a chance at bringing back Jon…it was her.
And she didn't think she could waste it.
"What do you need me to do?" she whispers, looking at Kinvara. The red priestess nods, walking over to a table in the corner before grabbing a goblet. She walks over before pulling out a knife from inside her robe. Daenerys raises an eyebrow at her.
"You can never be too careful – anyone should have a weapon on them," Kinvara says to her. She hands the knife to Daenerys. She looks at the handle, and that's when she realized what it was…it wasn't just any old knife. It was a dagger.
The dagger Jon had used to kill her.
"Why do you have this?" Daenerys asks in shock.
"When Drogon brought you here, the dagger was still embedded into you. I've kept it with me for safe-keeping but never did I think it could be used for this. The dagger was used to take a life - to cause death. Now, if you use the dagger against your hand to draw your own blood, it may cause life, a chance to save Jon's life – a balance in how it was used will be restored. I need you to slice your hand open – any part that won't cause serious harm – and fill the goblet. Once that is done, you may give it to me, and I will be able to do the ritual."
Daenerys swallows before looking at the woman. "I…I can't be here for it?"
"My queen," Kinvara starts. "What I am about to do is a very sacred and old ritual – one that requires the utmost concentration and vigilance. If I am disturbed or there is any type of distraction that causes me to lose focus, it will be for nothing. I need you to stay out of the room."
Daenerys nods quietly, before glancing down at her hand. She slowly takes the dagger and looks at it, memories flashing in her mind – but right now, she knew that she needed to push that down and just do it. So, she brings her hand that had been injured by Arya the night before, unwrapping it. She could almost still hear the conversation she and Jon had.
Once the bandages were off, her eyes glazed over the wound. It was crusted over, but still very fresh. She could easily cut into this. So, quietly, she takes the knife and slices it deep across her hand. Tears threaten to fall from her eyes and she bites her lip so hard that she bleeds, but she does not scream. She looks at her hand as blood begins to pour out of it. Shakily, she places the dagger down and raises the goblet below the injury, squeezing the hand tightly.
Dark red blood slowly begins to fill it. She watches it silently as it drips down, filling it a quarter of the way, half, and then almost to the top. By the time she was finished, she felt quite light-headed. She sits down and grabs the bandages again, wrapping it around her hand, before turning back to where Kinvara was, and that was when she saw it.
Kinvara had been prepping the body while she had been filling the goblet, so focused on what her hand was feeling. On the slate now was Jon's body, free of his clothes and covered in a blanket on the lower end, but her eyes instantly went to the large and fresh wound on his chest. The faded scars from his first murder at the Night's Watch jumped out, but her eyes were solely focused on the fatal one in front of her.
How could she have let this happened?
"…y queen?"
She shakes her head before her eyes trace back to where Kinvara was. She was standing patiently. "I'm sorry," Daenerys answers, her voice quiet. She walks over to Kinvara, handing her the goblet of her blood. "I'll step outside. Let you do the ritual."
She goes to the door but stops, turning back to the red priestess.
"Please…save him."
Kinvara gives her a grim smile but tries to speak as kind as she could. "I will try my hardest."
Daenerys slowly nods before turning back around. She uses her good hand to open the door to the temple and then closes it as she steps out into the hallway. Quietly, she makes her way to her chambers, forcing herself not to look back.
Daenerys didn't know how to properly feel right now. While her mind kept thinking back to what Kinvara was doing, there was still the fact that she didn't know what might happen. This could have all been for nothing. She could have cut herself again for nothing. She could have risked using blood magic again, and lose someone she cared about – for nothing.
That seemed to be the regular nowadays.
She stared down at her bandages. They were covered in dried blood now and desperately needed to be changed, but she couldn't harbor herself enough to stand and change them. She could request Eleana to come in here and change them for her, but even then, just speaking seemed to wipe her out.
There was no strength in her. The last ounce of strength she had was when she had shown her daughter her sword – and then once she placed that weapon down, her strength vanished.
She took occasional glances into her mirror. Her hair was completely out of its braids now. Some of it still had speckles of his blood in her strands, but nothing too much. She had forced herself to change out of her dress into something else that wasn't covered in blood, but even then, her eyes still drifted towards it.
Her mind kept thinking back to Jon. Back to everything they had been through. The moment she had seen him again after all that time. He had done everything to make sure she and her children would survive. That they would make their way back to Meereen somehow alive. She had promised them safety – and instead, had given him death.
As much as her heart wanted to deny it, she cared deeply for Jon. Whether it was something stronger than she knew or it was based on what they had gone through, she didn't care. He hadn't deserved what happened to him, and it was her fault for not putting Daario out of the pyramid as soon as he started to grow violent.
It was all her fault…everything was her fault…
"Fuck," she whispers, resting her hands against her head.
At that moment, there was a soft knock on the door. Daenerys forces herself to look up before she glances towards the door. "Come in." Her voice was weak.
The door opens and Daenerys see Eleana walk in. She had changed out of her clothes as well after what had happened. She closes the door gently behind her before walking to where Daenerys sat on the edge of the bed. "My grace," she states softly. "I am so sorry."
Daenerys looks up at the young woman. "You have nothing to apologize for. You are not the one who slammed your sword into his back." To that, Eleana was silent. She walks over to the bed and sits next to her.
"Daemon is within his chambers – Dan has left."
Daenerys' brow furrows. "What do you mean?"
"I went to check on them again, and Dan is not in her chambers."
Daenerys sighs before slowly standing. "I suppose she must have gone to the library." She looks around and sighs quietly. "Now that I think of it, I haven't seen Ghost either…maybe he followed her." She looks at the ground. "I will go speak with her…how is Daemon?"
"He is resting," Eleana responds. "When I first brought him in his chambers he fought me – said he wanted to see Jon – but I said it was under your orders to keep him away. He didn't like that much but I didn't have much of a choice. Now that I went back there, he seemed to have passed out from his stress."
Daenerys sighs and nods. "Good." She goes to grab her shoes, but Eleana's voice calls out to her.
"He was a good man," she states softly.
"He is a good man," Daenerys snaps, correcting her. She turns to the girl, seeing her shocked expression. "Don't say that in my presence."
"My queen, I thought-"
"I don't care what you thought. Jon isn't gone. He can't be. But the more you say that the more danger he will be in. Just…" She could feel tears starting to come again and she held them back, shaking her head. "Don't say that. Please don't…not in front of me."
"As you wish, my grace," the girl responds softly.
Daenerys swallows and nods. "I'm going to go check on Dan. You make sure that the mess in the dining chambers is cleaned. And-" Suddenly, there was another knock on the door. Daenerys glances over. "Come in," she repeats once more. If it was another damn guard coming in to check on her, she was going to explode.
But instead, it was Kinvara. Her hands were covered in what looked like blood, and her hair was tied back. Daenerys comes forward, hoping for something positive – anything.
"What happened?" she asks, anxiety leaking out of her voice.
Kinvara sighs before stepping into the room. "He has not awoken," Kinvara states simply, walking over to her. Daenerys felt her shoulders fall. Her whole world began to sink. But Kinvara shakes her head and walks to her. "Just because he has not awoken doesn't mean the magic did not work. It might take time, and it might never. Remember what happened to you? It took you a year to awaken after your injury. For him…I don't know how long it's going to take."
Daenerys swallows, flashes of what happened to Drogo echoing in her mind. "Is there some riddle with this too?" she bites out. "Just as it was when I was younger?"
Kinvara looks at her sadly. "No, my queen. Just patience. Patience is the only thing we have."
Daenerys looks at the ground, wiping her nose and her eyes before anything else leaked out. "Alright…I guess that's that then." She swallows and looks at the ground once more before looking back at Kinvara. "I'm going to go find my daughter and my son…thank you."
Kinvara nods, bowing to her before leaving the room. Daenerys watches her go before looking back at Eleana.
"Do you know where the guards brought Daario?" she asks her quietly.
"Yes. I heard that locked him in the dungeons – next to the Stark girl."
Daenerys nods quietly, before standing up and grabbing her cloak to wrap around her. "I'm going to pay him a visit before I see my children. If they need anything, attend to it." Eleana nods as Daenerys goes to leave. She stops at her door, letting out a long sigh. "I am sorry for snapping before. I'm just…"
She didn't know how to feel. She didn't know what to say. Eleana gently comes over to her and grabs her hand. "I understand, Daenerys," she says softly to her.
Daenerys smiles at the young woman before pulling her in for a tight hug. It was times like this Eleana reminded her so much of Missandei. She had that same smile and way of making her feel less alone. Even if she was younger, she knew that Eleana was one of the most honest and sweetest women she had ever met.
She pulls back and squeezes her hand. Daenerys moves away after that and goes to the door, leaving her chambers and walking in the direction of the dungeon, her mood changing and her feet walking heavier. It was time to face this monster – before her mind got to her first.
As she walked past the dining chambers, she quickly made a stop at the table, ignoring the stains of the blood on the floor. Quietly, she picked up Dark Sister, holding the handle tightly in her grip, willing herself to hold down the emotion she felt, before placing it in its holster. She ties it around herself tightly before descending back down to the dungeons.
She knew what her first kill would be.
The dungeon seemed darker than usual, and the flames that were lit on the torches that lined the walls did little to light the way. But Daenerys knew exactly where she was going, and who she was going to.
As she walked down the hallway that lead to Arya's cell, she knew that Daario would be close by. And as she did, she could hear the moan coming from his drunken stupor. Daenerys grips her sword, walking towards the sound when a soft voice stopped her.
"Daenerys?"
She looks over into the darkness of a cell before seeing two feet appear from beyond the shadows. Within seconds, Arya was at the foot of the bars, looking at her. Daenerys let her hand fall from her sword, watching as the girl looked her up and down, her brow furrowed.
"Why do you look awful?" the girl asks. "Your hair has blood in it, and your hands…what happened?"
Daenerys was quiet, staring at the girl. The guards hadn't told her.
"I…I saw that man get dragged in here," Arya says quietly, nodding towards Daario's cell. "Does it have something to do with that?"
Slowly, Daenerys nods. Gods, how would she tell Jon's sister that he was dead? That there was a slim to none chance he would awaken?
"Oh…is Jon okay?"
Those three words made Daenerys look away. Why is it that she was so good at speeches, at commanding others, and yet right here, standing in front of a girl locked away, she could barely form a single word?
"Jon," she starts out, trying to control the shake in her voice. "…is gone."
Silence.
Daenerys looks up to see Arya had taken several steps back, but the grief on her face was undeniable. Silent tears slid down her cheeks, and in the darkness, Daenerys could make out her mouth shaping the word 'no,' but no sound came through. She collapses onto her knees.
"The man that was dragged her…is the one who ended him." Daenerys swallows and shakes her head. "…I am so sorry, Arya."
The young girl doesn't respond. She stares in shock, as the tears continued to roll down her cheeks. Daenerys turns away, forcing herself to look at Daario's cell. She couldn't stay with the Stark girl. If she did, she would lose her will, her motivation to be down here. She couldn't let her grief guide her right now. It was her rage she needed to embrace.
She walks over to Daario's cell and looks further. There in the middle was his body, clearly unconscious. She could see a stain on the ground from where his leg had bled – the last wound Jon had put in him before he got up. Daenerys reaches into her pocket and pulls out the keys she had taken from the top of the dungeon stairs, before opening up the lock.
Slowly, the door opens as she pulls the key out, and she walks in. Her hand rests on the handle of her sword again, before she walks calmly over to where Daario laid. She stared down at his pathetic form, his body spread out, his mouth ajar, slobber dribbling down his chin. How had she once slept with this man?
"Get up," she growls.
The man does not move.
She brings her foot down as hard as she could onto his leg, right against his wound, and he screams in pain, his eyes blasting open. "I said get up!"
He stares up at her in shock as he backs himself up against the wall. "What the – Daenerys, I-"
She suddenly drops her sword and backhands him across the face so hard he probably saw stars. And then, something in her snapped. She didn't just slap him – she punched him across the fact again, and again. She had never been one to get physical – mainly because most of her men in the past had done it for her. But now, the one person that had taught her how to defend herself was dead, and the least she could do was use the techniques he taught her.
Including how to punch.
"Daenerys, stop – please – I, fuck, stop!"
Daenerys suddenly drags his body upward. On a normal day, there was no way she could get this physical with a man like Daario, but he was weak and still intoxicated, and she needed this. More than anything.
"Do you have any idea what you've done?!" she hisses to him, pinning him up against the wall. "Tell me. Tell me what it is you've done!"
The man groans for a second, and that only makes her lose her patience more. She slams her fist against his face again, causing him to cry out.
"Tell me."
"I – I killed Jon Snow," he shakily says, staring at her. Blood was dripping from his nose and mouth now, and his eyes were becoming swollen. "I k-killed him."
Just those words sent off a whole row of emotions inside of her. She drops Daario to the ground, watching as he fell onto his arse and buried himself into the wall, staring up at her. She takes a step back, trying to will herself not to lose herself. She looks at the ground.
"You killed him," she whispers, before slowly looking back at him. "You killed the father of the queen's children. You came in a drunken haze, and when I specifically asked you to get the fuck out, you challenged him and killed him."
It was at that moment she could hear the first sob come from the other cell in the dungeon, and that almost broke Daenerys. As many differences as she and Arya had, there was one similarity they had in common – how much both cared for Jon.
Daario stares up at her, his mouth opening and closing like a fish. That only seemed to infuriate her more.
"Say something!" she yells, this time not holding back her anger. The fire from the torches begins to flicker the same way it did in the dining chambers. "Have you nothing to defend yourself, you bastard?!"
"D-Daenerys," the man shakily says, staring up at her. He was still slurring his words, but not as much as before. "I – I only did what I-I d-did because I was thinking of you. For your own safety and-"
Daenerys suddenly pulls Dark Sister out and aims it right against the man's neck. Daario instantly shuts up and closes his eyes. She could almost hear him whimpering.
"I do not need a man saying he will protect me anymore – especially to the likes of a queen," she snaps, tears threatening to fall, her voice a fierce whisper. "I am capable of keeping myself safe, of making my own choices…Jon was here for a reason, and you didn't have to like it…but now you've ruined it." She could almost feel herself shaking. "I don't need your opinion on who I care for. I don't need you to suddenly think that you are responsible for me. When are you ever going to get it through your thick skull that I will never love you?! No matter what you say about whoever, or what you do, I am not going to ever have the same feelings for you, ever. And you thought killing him would make me want you?!"
He still doesn't say anything, his eyes closed from her sword. She shakes her head, before chuckling, almost darkly.
"I can't believe I ever fucked you," she whispers. She usually was never this vulgar, but right now, the queen part of her didn't care. "I never should have let you into my bed. You served me for the time I needed, but after that – you truly were nothing. You were a swordsman – and that's it. Not a knight. Not a lord. Not even worth cleaning my chamber pot. You are nothing. And you are going to die nothing."
The man doesn't reply still, but he opens his eyes, this time staring at the edge of her sword before looking back at her. "P-Please, Dany-"
"Don't call me that!" she snaps, her sword edging into his neck. It drew a slight hint of blood, but nothing much besides that. Tears broke her line of vision and dripped down her cheeks at the mention of that name. The one name she had told Jon not to say when she first saw him again…and the last thing he did call her. She was still Dany to him.
Daario doesn't move, staring down at her sword. It would be so easy. So quick.
She stares down at him, her hands tightening around the handle of her sword before she shakes her head and then slams it into his thigh, pulling it out. He collapses onto the ground as he holds his other leg – the one Jon hadn't hurt – pulling it closer to nurse the fresh wound, staring up at her in shock.
"It would be so easy to kill you," she whispers, looking down at her now bloody sword. "But Jon deserves better than that. So you live for now. But when I do kill you…it's going to be slow. And painful. Because for what you did, for the life you took away, that's what you deserve."
She slams her sword back into her holster before leaving the cell, locking the door behind her. She didn't care if he was bleeding, or if he cried from the pain. If anything, it fueled her.
"Goodbye, Daario," she mutters before turning away. She looks over into Arya's cell as she leaves, but could not see the girl in the shadows. Even so, she could still hear her crying. Daenerys shakes her head and looks at the ground, walking up the steps. Once she reaches the top, she closes the door, places the key back on the outside, and feels herself collapse against the wall.
Quietly, she walks towards the floor where the temple was. She needed to see him, needed to just figure out what to do. How to feel. If Kinvara did anything strange. If he – she didn't know. With sorcery, anything could happen. She just needed to see him.
As she arrived outside of the temple, she slowly opened the door and expected to see his body on the slab – and yet, there was nothing.
"…wha..?" She runs inside, looking around, and felt herself start to panic. Where was his body? What had Kinvara done?"
She runs outside as she looks around for a guard, anyone that could have an answer until she came across the red priestess herself. She was startled at Daenerys bumping into her but steadied herself out quite quickly. "My grace, what's wrong?"
"Jon's body…it…where is it? Did it disappear? Did it-"
"Take a deep breath," Kinvara instructed her. "You're going to stop breathing at the rate you are speaking." Daenerys stares at her, but Kinvara only nods her head. The dragon queen rolls her eyes before doing so, taking in a deep breath and letting it out. "Now that you're calm after your clear altercation with Daario," she starts, causing Daenerys to stare at her. Again, she had no clue she was going down there. Kinvara really knew all – it was creepy sometimes. "We took Jon's body to his chambers…I believe maybe being somewhere warmer than a slab might help him heal and awaken if possible…it's only a precautionary measure. We didn't do that with you and woke up but…it's different circumstances."
"Oh," Daenerys mumbles before nodding her head. She didn't know where her headspace was right now. All she wanted to do was go to his chambers, to see him again, but she knew she needed to see her children – more specifically Dan, who wasn't even in her own chambers. "Thank you, Kinvara."
The red priestess nods before walking past her. "You should go check on Dan. I haven't seen her since I've come out."
Daenerys nods, watching her head around the corner before disappearing out of sight. She lets out a breath before going up the stairs. Seeing Jon could wait – she needed to find her daughter first.
When Daenerys reached the library, she could see that it was closed off – something Dan liked to do so no one interrupted her when she read. But Daenerys quietly ignored that rule, and opened up the door, peeking inside. At first, she sees nothing. There were only piles of books on the floor, ones that Dan had already read.
But as she stepped deeper inside, she started to feel her heart drop. There were hundreds of books everywhere on the ground, some opened and some not, but what made Daenerys stop was the fact that most of them, if not all, were burnt.
Dan's powers had gotten the better of her. She had been grieving and had lost control. Daenerys could still feel the heat of the torch against her fingers, the one that had been extinguished, so this had been recent, but it was enough to make her move deeper into the library.
"Dan?" she calls out softly, trying to hear her daughter. "It's only me…I want to talk with you, please."
She doesn't hear a response. Daenerys moves her way through the stacks of books, seeing titles peeking out. She could see a history of Essos, of the Southern Isles, tales of the Westerosi knights – so many interesting things that she didn't even know her daughter had learned about. Daenerys walks around another casing of books, still not finding her daughter.
"Dan?" she calls out again. At this rate, her daughter might have left the library and gone somewhere else – and that would be an issue.
But finally, when she turns a corner, she sees a tiny body huddled up on the window seat, staring out into the world, her legs tucked into her with her arms wrapped around her tightly. Daenerys walks over to her slowly, moving so she sat opposite her on the window seat.
It was quiet between the two for a moment. All Daenerys could hear in the dark and cold room was the sniffles of Dan. And then, after a moment, she glances back at her mother.
"He shouldn't have died," Dan whispers. "He shouldn't have."
Daenerys sighs, looking at the ground. "I know he shouldn't have."
Dan looks back outside and slowly starts to shake her head. "He…he had so many plans. So many ideas."
Daenerys' brow furrows. "What do you mean?"
"He wanted to help so badly," she states, looking at the ground. "Father…when we were with the wildlings, they considered us like family, but for so long, because he was taking care of me, he never really lead them or told them what to do. He followed what they said and kept me close. But here…I saw him change. I saw him turn into the stories I was told…into a king, a leader." She glances back outside. "Ordering guards, fighting the bad guys, figuring out ways for people to be happy but to also keep order…he was changing for the better…but this isn't how the story is supposed to go."
She looks back over at Daenerys, her tears falling down her cheeks.
"He's supposed to beat the bad guys, lock them up, hurt them for what they did…but he didn't. He's dead because he thought Daario was hurt enough…and now he's gone. And I…I don't want to believe it…" She starts to cry harder. "But all the blood and…and…"
Daenerys wraps her arms around the young girl, feeling her sob against her. She knew that out of the two children, Dan would be feeling it the hardest. While Daemon did love his father – he had expressed it to her multiple times at this point – Dan had grown up with Jon for far longer.
"I know," she whispers, running her good hand through the girl's hair as she cried. "I know, I know." She rocks her slowly back and forth, feeling her sob. An overwhelming sense of pain enveloped in her. She had never seen her children cry like this, and it hurt. It hurt more than she ever thought it would. "It's alright, my sweetling. Let it out."
Dan clings to her, as Daenerys stares outside at the rising sun. By the gods, had that much time passed that a complete night had come and gone? The skies were red with the light from the new day, but all Daenerys could think of is how much she didn't want to feel the rays. For the first time, she didn't want to be warm. She wanted to hold her children close to her, keeping them safe.
Dan after a moment pulls back, and Daenerys wipes the tears from her daughter's face. "I know," she repeats softly to her, resting her hand on her cheek. "He didn't deserve to die. He shouldn't have. But you must know that you aren't alone…we are all here, and we will make it through this together." She holds her daughter's hand as she whimpers. "You have me, and you have your brother. And trust me…his killer will meet his end."
Dan sniffles, staring at the ground. "I didn't know Daario loved you that much," she states softly.
Daenerys sighs, holding her daughter close. "Daario didn't love me," she responds to her. "I used to think he did, but a man in love would never do something like that – you should listen to this, honestly." Dan looks up at her, her brow furrowed. "It will be long before you face any kind of love or relationship, my child, but know that a man in love with you would never hurt someone you care about. I have had many, many men fall for me, and not one of them have gone against my wishes when it came to the souls I cared for. Men who love you will do anything for you to keep you safe, to make sure you are happy and healthy…men who love you will step out of their comfort zone and do things for you that you never thought they would do…men who truly love you will always be there for you…even if you were never really there for them."
Dan tilts her head a little, wiping at her nose. "Like father?"
Daenerys looks down at her, the statement surprising her slightly. Obviously her mind had been preoccupied with what happened to Jon, but before she had been thinking of him in a certain way that she hadn't in a long time. And each time, she pushed that thought down, wanting to move on from the past.
But now that Dan stated it…it made sense. With everything she said, Jon had been like that. Even when he first met Daario, he hadn't hurt the man or made any interaction with him because Daenerys had requested him not to for the sake of peace in the pyramid. Jon had made sure she had a roof over her head when she was hurt in Volantis, that she and the children were taken care of while they traveled across the Great Grass Sea. Jon had even gone out into the streets of Meereen, not knowing where to go, and repeatedly went out to redo her family's sword, one that had been lost for practically centuries.
And even when she wanted him gone when she first saw him in White Harbor, he had stayed. And she had never been more thankful.
"Yes," Daenerys whispers, feeling herself looking at the ground. "Just like father."
That had hurt even more to say it now.
Dan bites her lip and looks at the ground. "I want to see him." Daenerys looks down at her in shock and Dan nods, confirming her thoughts. "I was in shock before, but I…I need to see him. I have to. I know you brought him to Kinvara after but I…I don't care if nothing worked. I just have to see him."
Daenerys nods softly before grabbing her daughter's hand. "Alright. If that's what you wish…but if you want to leave, you let me know immediately."
Dan nods softly, grabbing onto her hand. Daenerys gently helps her stand and walks out with her, feeling the weight of the world drape along Dan's shoulders. No child should have to deal with this. But then again, they weren't normal children, were they?
When they arrived outside of Jon's chambers, Daenerys didn't know if even she was ready to go in there. She had gone to check on Daemon and found him still sleeping, so it was only going to be her and Dan. She looks down at her daughter before slowly opening the door, looking inside.
Gods, it looked like he was just sleeping, except his chest was not rising and falling with each breath. It was as still as water.
Dan slowly walks over and Daenerys stays behind, watching her quietly. She jumps onto the bed for a moment and just stares down at Jon, not saying anything. She could see her lip trembling like she was about to cry, but she held it in. After a moment, she reaches over and grabs Jon's limp hand.
"Hi," she hears Dan whispers, her voice shaky. "I know you probably can't hear me…but I just wanted to see you one more time." Her sniffles begin at that, and she looks at the ground. "I don't know if what mother did will work…if any of it will work…but I wanted you to know you were the best father any girl could have asked for." Daenerys looks down at the ground, willing herself not to cry. "I always heard…stories from…books…about how fathers would never treat their daughters right…and you did everything those fathers didn't do…you gave me courage and more…and I wish I could thank you right now…And I wish I had used it when Daario was hurting you."
Dan looks down at the ground before letting out a shaky sigh.
"I love you," she whispers before standing, letting go of his hand. She walks away, looking at the ground. Daenerys squeezes her shoulder and then pulls her in for a tight hug. When she pulls away, Daenerys looks at her with a calm expression, letting her hand rest on the girl's cheek.
"He called you something before…" Her words trail off. She still couldn't bring herself to say it. "What was it?"
Dan lets out a bittersweet smile. "Little wolf…it's what he used to call me a long time ago because I was really interested in Stark history. When I got older, I guess it just kind of…went away. I didn't think he still…remembered it."
At that moment, more tears started to fall down her cheeks. Daenerys rests her hands against the child's sides. "Well you don't need to be ashamed of it," she says to the girl softly. "You are part-Stark. It's your family."
Dan looks up and nods quietly. "I know…I just can't think of it while he's over there."
Daenerys nods before standing. "Why don't you go back to your chambers?" Daenerys asks her softly. "I'm sure Arya has been waiting for you."
Dan looks at the ground. "I suppose I've kept her alone for long enough." She looks over at her mother before nodding softly. "Thank you…for letting me see him."
Daenerys nods, watching as Dan walked away back towards her chambers. Daenerys lets out a shaky breath and looks back into the room. Quietly, she walks in and closes the door gently behind her. She walks over to the bed, gently sitting on the side and grabbing his hand.
It was still just as cold as she expected it to be.
"I know this is maddening," Daenerys starts out, looking at the ground. "But maybe if Dan found solace in it…I can." She looks over at Jon's still form and finally feels every ounce of emotion she had pent up let loose. Tears started to fall down her cheeks. Anger developed along with her sadness, her grief. She felt herself practically fall against the bed, her head hanging. "Why did you have to do it alone?" she whispers, sobs racking her body. "Starks and their bloody honor…"
She wipes the tears from her face and looks back at his own, eyes still closed. Chest still flat.
"It's funny how life turns out," she starts, trying to control the sound of her voice. The last thing she needed was people hearing her crying. "I had sworn when Daemon was born that I would try my hardest to never have him meet his father…to never meet the man that killed his mother…and now that he has, and he's met Dan, and I have met her…I don't think we've ever been happier."
Another sob breaks through and she covers her mouth, shaking her head. After a moment, she calms herself down, taking a deep breath.
"The thing is, Jon," she states quietly, keeping her words from mulling over to the next one. "I didn't realize what I had until I lost it…I didn't realize how amazing of a family I was gifted until it was taken away from me…I didn't realize that you were here, all along…and I had treated you like scum for so long…" She shakes her head and stares at the ground. "We both know what happened in the past…but both of us have changed and I…I didn't want to stay stuck there anymore. And now, looking at you, I-" She stops herself, staring down. She didn't even know how to feel. Words couldn't describe her feelings. And as she searched her head to figure out what could, she finally came across the ones that came close to it. "I never wanted to lose you, Jon," she whispers before laughing bitterly. "I guess I…I always thought you would be there…because you're Jon fucking Snow…the military leader, the 'King in the North,' but…but I was too late."
She looks at the ground again, her hand digging into the sheets. Daenerys moves her head to stare at the wall. It was becoming too much to look at him.
"I did a ritual with Kinvara – apparently my blood is what she needed and now it's in you somewhere." She glances over at him and sees Kinvara had dressed him in what looked like a robe of some sort, and as she moved it slightly, she could see she had wrapped up his wound tightly – after whatever she had done. "I don't know if it'll work…I don't know what the future holds…but just know that I…" She sighs and shakes her head before standing. She didn't want to say her goodbyes. She didn't want to do this. She didn't want him to leave. Tears escaped her eyes again, falling to the ground. She moves away, knowing her emotions were getting the better of her. If she kept doing this, she was going to break down in the middle of the room.
So instead, she looks back at him and grabs his hand.
"Please," she whispers, closing her eyes. "Please, to any God up there or below or…I don't know…please bring him back…have him back…we need him here…I need him here," she shakily states. "Please…please come back."
Daenerys opens her eyes and stares down at Jon before turning away, forcing herself out of the room. If she didn't do it now, she didn't know when she would leave. And now, she needed to.
But all she kept doing was repeating that one word in her mind. 'Please.'
Daemon
He hadn't been sleeping.
He hadn't slept since what happened in the dining chambers. He had been completely focused on that. At first, he had cried. A lot. Of course, he would – but afterward, he had tried to get some sleep and couldn't.
Each time he closed his eyes, he kept having the same dreams he had been having over and over. It wasn't the one that Dan had, but it was different. It was him in a field, standing over a body, something glowing beneath him – something good.
And each time he woke up, he felt like there was something he should be doing. Somewhere he should be going. But each time he looked outside his door, he could see his mother crying. Or hear Dan doing the same. Was it okay for him to just leave his room and go to his father's chambers?
He lived there too, and he had as much of a right to see him. But with each step he took towards the door, he felt nerves rack his body. His dreams had been telling him something – making him think he could do things he didn't think he could do. But he would never know if he didn't give it a chance.
And as he walked down the hallways, he felt a swell of confidence in him. Maybe these dreams were real. Maybe this was what he was meant to be. Kinvara and Bennero had said that he was meant for something – that he would have power too as his sister did, but he didn't know what it was.
Fire? He didn't know if it would ever be that. As much as he had a connection to fire through his house name, even through his mother, that didn't feel like it would be his power. He loved being a Targaryen and loved his family. He loved his dragons and loved who they were. But having fire powers? That never seemed like him. But maybe…maybe something else?
"I'm going mad," he whispers to himself before he reaches the outside of the room. Daemon takes a deep breath before walking inside, slowly closing the door behind him. He looks over and sees Ghost was laying in the corner, his head between his legs, grieving. The last he had seen of Ghost, he had been with Dan and had come into her room to aid her in healing, but this was the first time he had seen the direwolf so closely to his master's side.
Ghost raises his head and looks over at Daemon questioningly, but Daemon raises his hands in soft defense. "Don't worry, boy…I'm not going to hurt him."
The direwolf stares before slowly lowering his head back down, watching him closely. Daemon walks back over to the bed, climbing up on top of it before his eyes finally land on his father. He really did look gone. The color had faded from his cheeks and his body was completely frozen. It was almost like he was a statue and not once a man.
"I know that Kinvara tried something on you," he says quietly. "I…I don't question that she's powerful. I know she is. She brought back mother…she brought back us, honestly," he states quietly, looking at the bedsheets for a moment before looking back at his father. "But there's been something I've been hiding from people for a long time and I…I didn't know how to explain it. Even hiding it from you. But now…with what happened yesterday…I don't know if there will ever be a better time to explain it."
He swallows and starts to move the robe Kinvara had placed over him, starting to cut open the bandages slightly to expose his wound. Daemon takes a deep breath and lets it out, slow and steady.
"I've been wondering what my purpose is," he starts out. "After seeing how much Dan can do…I didn't know if I would ever be as good as her, let alone her with her powers. But I…I've been having these dreams of me…in the future, older…I look like you," he states quietly, a small but sad smile on his face. "And I…I'm able to help people through my hands. I…I say something in a language that I don't really know…I know mother speaks it but I never learned it well yet…but I know that after I say it, the person gets better and I…I don't know if maybe this is a sign. Maybe it's what I'm meant to do and maybe…maybe just this little extra bit will help you open your eyes again…or I could just be holding onto hope."
He swallows and looks at the wound. It still looked fresh and stitched together, but he knew he had to try. There were far too many things hurt in his father's body for him to not try.
"I don't know if this will hurt," he states quietly. "I mean, you're dead…but I…I have to try, father and…and if you do wake up, then it'll be for the better. If not, I…I at least know we tried as much as we could."
He swallows and then gently presses his small hands onto his father's wound. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and lets it out, while gently stating a phrase that he had used in his dreams.
"Kostagon se rāenion rāenābagon qrīdrughagon aōha ōdria," he starts out, barely even knowing what he was saying but knowing that it meant something. "Kostagon se ōños guide ao va ābrar."
Suddenly, he feels a soft, warm sensation arise from his body. He opens his hands and looks down, feeling his heart stop. His hands were glowing a bright red, just as they did in his dreams. He felt himself start to smile. Maybe this would work. Maybe his madness actually meant something.
"Kostagon se sȳz muña feed ao arlī naejot rytsāri," he keeps saying, closing his eyes once more. "Kostagon se sȳz kepa ignite aōha kustikāne istin tolī. Se Āeksiot Ōño brōzas va aōha brōzi - sīmonagon, Se ao kessa sagon āzma aril."
Then, he says the whole phrase again, and again, and again. It was said four times in the dream, the same words, and phrases. And, at the very end, when he repeats the last word for the fourth time, he slams his hands down hard onto the man's chest, causing the bed to move beneath him. The light from his hands suddenly leaves and lights up the whole room, causing Daemon to shield his eyes.
It was so bright he could barely see what was in front of him. The room became warm, almost hot to the touch. He could swear he could almost hear someone speaking to him. And then suddenly, everything vanished. The room became cold and dark once more. He looks over at Ghost, who was now at the edge of the bed, staring at Daemon with what looked like surprise in the direwolves eyes – if they could even feel that.
Daemon looks over at Jon, hoping, praying to see something move. An eye twitch, a finger crinkle, anything, but there was nothing but silence. Nothing but stillness. Whatever that had been…it didn't work.
"Was…was I seeing things?" he whispers, staring down at his hands. They seemed completely normal to him now. He looks over at Jon and felt tears come to his eyes, but he wipes them away. He had cried too much. If…if his father really was gone, then he'd have to grow up. And that included not paying attention to his stupid dreams anymore.
He knew it was worthless. He needed to stop thinking that everyone was special.
"At least I tried," he whispers, standing up and grabbing the man's hand. "Hopefully…maybe one day I can see you again…I'm sorry none of us can help you."
At that, he moves his hand away and walks out, shaking his head. One day, maybe…maybe he would find his purpose. But right now, he was just a child believing he could, what, bring someone back from the dead?
What was he, a red priest? He needed to stop dreaming and start living in the real world – at least for his father.
Daenerys
The next morning came and went. And then the next. And then the next.
After Dan and she had had their conversations with Jon, Daenerys had gone back to her chambers and had practically buried herself into her bed, not willing to get out. She had stated to Eleana that her audience chambers were closed for a time. Her headspace was nowhere near where it needed to be to take on anyone's issues – let alone her own.
If there was a serious inquiry that needed to be taken into consideration, she gave Eleana her word from her chambers, but most of the time, it was never anything that would threaten their lives. Most of her days were spent in her chambers.
She couldn't bear to drag herself out. She would visit her children, make sure they were fed, speak with them, talk with them, be there for them.
Daemon revealed to her after a couple of days that he had been having dreams for a couple of months, but thinks them to mean 'nothing.' She had asked why, and he had revealed he had already tested it out. What he had tested, she didn't know – he was quite vague about it – but she knew that it had caused him deep sorrow. She had tried to be there for him as much as she could, telling him that no matter what, he would always mean the world to her, regardless of dreams or not.
Dan, on the other hand, had been burying herself back into her books after the next days had passed. Daenerys had stopped by and seen her cuddling with her direwolf while reading a history book on the Starks, something she didn't even know how they got into their library – thank the Gods for spies – but as long as it was a distraction – a good distraction – Daenerys supported it.
The last person she visited regularly was Arya. While she couldn't stay down there for long – being in Daario's presence was far too much to handle at high volumes of time – she would speak to the girl, make sure she was doing okay. Arya had been quiet, hadn't said anything to her, but had accepted her meals that Daenerys would bring down personally to her. After a few days, she had finally talked to her.
And then, she would tell her stories about Jon's childhood, how she grew up with him and how he always treated her well. How he was the only one who took her dream of wanting to become a knight seriously. How he had been such a good big brother and it only made Daenerys feel even worse.
But each time she did visit with the Stark girl, she could feel a little bit of a smile come to her cheeks. When the past started to move on, it was funny how much she and Arya had in common regarding family history, wanting to prove themselves. If Daario wasn't in there, she had a feeling she would be able to talk with her for quite some time about her adventures. Even Daenerys was interested in learning about what was in fact west of Westeros.
At the end of each session though, she would go upstairs and remember the world again, and the pain she felt would come crashing down again on her once more.
Now, it had been two weeks. She had been avoiding people for quite some time, only talking to the essentials. But she knew that she was a queen first, and a person second. If she didn't own up to her emotions and push them away so she could do what she came to Meereen to do, someone would rise up.
So, on the fifteenth day, where she finally felt the urge to get out of bed and get herself ready, she did. She grabbed one of her best comfort dresses – it wasn't anything fancy, just enough to keep her dressed royally while also keeping her comfortable – and did her hair as simple as she could, letting it down on her shoulders while taking two strands and braiding it to the back.
After a moment, she takes a deep breath and nods to herself, before leaving the room, placing her shoes on as she did so. Once she was down a level, she knew her children would still be sleeping. Her eyes travel towards Jon's chambers and she feels herself sigh.
For the past two weeks, while she had been visiting with her children and Arya frequently, she also found time to speak with Jon. She knew it was pointless, and there wasn't anyone in there, but it gave her comfort to talk with him about her days, about what Dan had been reading, or how Daemon had started practicing again, or how Arya had opened up to her about Gendry. It made her feel that she still had him to speak to…even if he wasn't in the room with her.
But now, she needed to be in her chambers. She needed to face her people, and that meant changing around her life a little.
So, she wills herself to walk past Jon's chambers, heading around the corner. But just as she was about to turn, she hears a loud crash echo from where Jon lay, and she felt herself stop. She turns around, her brow furrowed. What in the seven hells had that been? She didn't order anyone to clean his room or go in there.
Daenerys takes a glance towards where her chambers were before sighing. She needed to know what that crash was. It would haunt her all day if she didn't.
She walks towards the door and opens it slowly peaking inside. Her eyes look around the room, looking to the open doors of the balcony, the table, the closet and everything else. She even looked around for Ghost and found him surprisingly absent. She glances around the area again before her eyes settled on the cause of the crash.
It was broken glass. It looked as if it had been knocked off the table.
Daenerys quietly walks in and picks up the shards, wondering what on earth could have made this crash into the floor. She places them into a tissue clothe and turns around, expecting to see Jon's body on the bed, still as quiet as it was whenever she came in here. She already had a line about the wind being agitated about him being here and wanting to wake him up.
Except…his body wasn't there.
She stares at the empty bed before racing over, dropping the clothe filled with broken glass along the way. She looks all over, trying to see if maybe someone hid his body under the bed or took it but there were no signs of struggle other than the broken glass. Where the fuck was he?
"..what is going on?" she whispers to herself, starting to grow worrisome. She goes to feel the bed and suddenly stops.
The spot where Jon had been laying, right where the indent was of his chest, was warm.
At that moment, she suddenly hears a door open and snaps her head up. As soon as her eyes lay on what had made the sound, she brought a hand to her mouth in shock. Her eyes filled with tears, and she could almost feel her knees buckle beneath her as she walked over slowly to what it was.
There, clinging onto the bathing chambers door, was Jon. His grip was so tight his knuckles were white and he looked as if he was having trouble standing. But there was no mistaking the small smile, the one that was barely there and only she could see, that was on his face and directed at her.
"Hey, Dany," he whispers, his voice croaky and dry.
At that moment, he suddenly collapses, and she runs forward, catching him as best as she could. She knew he was probably very weak, and she needed to get him back to bed as quickly as possible. As soon as she moves him over and sits him on the edge, she realizes why he had been in the bathroom – there was vomit on his lips. He had thrown up. He must have stumbled on his way there and had knocked over the glass – that's what made the noise.
"You…what…how?" she whispers, resting her hands against his stubbly cheeks. Had the ceremony worked? She feels his own hand come up to touch her own, holding it tightly.
"I don't know," he mutters. She could tell that speaking was hard for him right now, but he was trying. "But…I'm here…and I'm…not going anywhere."
Daenerys blinks and her tears fall, but she hides her face into his neck, hugging him as tightly as she could without hurting him. She feels him hug her back as well, holding her body against his own. When she pulls back, she smiles genuinely for the first time in weeks
"Good, because I'm not letting you go," she whispers, resting her forehead against his own. He smiles at the statement, and she feels every single worry melt away. It had worked. Something had worked.
Jon Snow was alive, and he was back where he belonged – with Daenerys and their family. Together.
You didn't really think I'd let Jon stay dead this early in the story, huh? I love my boy too much.
So Jon is back and there's going to be a lot of shit happening next chapter cause of that - want a hint? Fluff. Lots of fluff. It's going to be fun. Also a serious revelation that like ya'll are gonna want to hear about. And a lot of action. Damn, I almost wish I had written the chapter already.
As always, love it? Hate It? Want to shoot an arrow through me like Ramsey did to Rickon? Let me know in the reviews, as they always keep me writing and pushing out these chapters as quick as I can - ya'll are all awesome and I can't wait to see what you think. Don't forget to follow and favorite if you want to join our adventure, and I'll see you all in the next chapter. Thank you all for reading and I hope you have a great day! Wash your hands and stay healthy! :)