lumigo akvo9504: Sorry I made you cry. If it makes you feel better, I cried too when I wrote it. Maybe that's a sign my subconscious sent me to stop writing sappy plotlines...
I'm sorry it took so long it's just... well, I guess the exams period took a bit too much energy from me. I've been so busy I almost only study now, and until my winter break starts I'm afraid that's how it's gonna be. It stresses me out not being able to write, but in between long study sessions I managed to finish this. Sorry if you were expecting more, but right now it's all I can give you, and I didn't want to leave you without a new chapter. I'll try to make the next one better.
Enjoy it!
As the weeks passed, and the summer break approached, Nagisa was slowly recovering. She knew she still had a long way before being OK, but her friends were supporting her, and she had her amazing boyfriend besides her. She still had to tell the Host Club about it though, as she felt it was necessary. They had become a part of Nagisa's life, and she considered them trustworthy enough to know.
But that, Nagisa thought, would have to wait. Maybe when she was... better. When it didn't affect her as much as it did now. Maybe then Nagisa would tell them everything, because they deserved to know the truth. At least, that part of it.
The bluenette was currently refilling her teapot, trying to hurry up because she was on a tight schedule that day. The Host Club was having a Secret-Garden-Aristocratic-Heian-Style-With-Cherry-Blossoms theme that day. It basically meant they were using the gardens of the school to make girls swoon over them even more than usual before the summer break started. Nagisa didn't really see any sense in it, as the girls melted at the single sight of them without the need of anything else, but she didn't care enough to stop them. It as kind of fun, actually, and even when she would never tell anyone, the bluenette had grown somewhat accustomed to the Host Club's antiques by now. She found them to be... amusing. Even if she had to do cosplay on an almost regular basis.
'Nothing I didn't do at the E Class.' well, she couldn't deny that now, could she?
The bluenette sigh at the unusual peacefulness. Normally the Host Club was chaotic, but that day they seemed to be pretty calm... of course, those thoughts were just screaming for a jinx.
"Haruhi, duck!" Nagisa raised an eyebrow when Tamaki tackled Haruhi, both falling to the ground as a ball passed above them, now directed to her. It was approaching fast, but after Korosensei's training everything was slower. So with expertise, she balanced the teapot in one hand, and caught the ball with the other.
And of course, the twins and Tamaki started fighting over oh you almost extinguish Haruhi's life, how could you?! You know, what normally happened at the Host Club, to Haruhi's demise and Nagisa's amusement. In the end, Tamaki acted out of idiocy—nothing really unseen, and threw the ball directly at one of the school's windows.
Yeah. Just like every. Single. Day.
Why did she had the feeling something wrong was about to happen? Oh right, because that was always the case with those guys.
'I really should get paid for standing this rich bastards...'
So now she was being followed by these creepy journalists. As you could have already guessed, not really Nagisa's style. She hated journalists and the media in general. They were the ones that made the whole world believe Korosensei was a monster, a bad person, when everything he did was to help them. But of course, nobody would believe what a bunch of kids had said, right? Especially when what they said ruined the story they wanted to print on the front cover.
But there was something more about those guys... it made Nagisa a little wary around them. They didn't seem really harmful, but Nagisa could feel... bloodlust. Poorly controlled, unforeseeable, and driven by anger. And it was coming from them, to the Host Club. Specifically to Tamaki, if Nagisa needed to guess. That itself was the stupidest thing ever, because Tamaki was really the less dangerous one out of the bunch, but Nagisa knew that she should wait for anything coming from those rich people.
Overall, she was uncomfortable. All the time. It was like they were watching her every step... as it they were looking for a mistake. Not just from her, but from all of them. Did the Newspaper Club wanted to put them down? Nagisa couldn't really be sure, but she did know she wasn't the only wary one. Even Haruhi, who usually was never aware of anything, could tell there was something going on, even if she couldn't put a name to it.
In fact, the only one who was still totally oblivious was... well, Tamaki himself, of course.
She understood where he was coming from with all that of family club or whatever. His family was the Host Club. It was kind of obvious, Mitsukuni himself had said it: Tamaki was just a lonely guy. He had always been, for what Nagisa had recalled until now. The Host Club was the one place where he could be himself, because he knew nobody would judge him. But that didn't mean every other club was the same, that all clubs were a family, and certainly the Newspaper Club wasn't.
The bluenette sighed as she snuggled closer to the wall. They were currently playing hide and seek, and her chosen hiding spot was the vents. Yes, she knew that was cheating, because no one would think about looking for someone inside the vents, but Nagisa was a little tired. She had had a nightmare the night before, just like it had been for the past week, and she hadn't sleep much. She didn't tell Mitsukuni about it, she didn't want to worry him. But the Newspaper Club's involvement was just too much. She needed a rest. Besides, the vents were, as the rest of the school, big and comfy, so it was actually a great spot. Nagisa would keep that in mind for when she wanted to escape her more-than-a-little-crazy friends.
In the end, her eyes closed shut, and her breathing steadied. Maybe she could take a quick nap before getting out of the vents? It sounded like a good idea... and it was warm and comfy... yeah, a nap sounded pretty nice...
"That's not fair, Korosensei! You move at Match 20, how are we supposed to beat you on a race?!" Nagisa remembered that day clearly. Karasuma-sensei had called in sick—which was weird because that man would have come to teach them even if his arm had been just chopped off, but whatever. The thing was, Korosensei had offered to take his place in PE. The Assassination Classroom didn't like it, because that teacher was a beast in PE, but they didn't really had any other choice. Unless they wanted Bitch-sensei to do it, but they didn't want to take their chances with that one. English was enough, thank you very much.
"Nurufufufufufu, isn't that the purpose of it all? You are going to try and beat me until you kill me! And if you don't success, I'll blow up the Earth by the end of the school year!" yes, they all knew that by now, there was no need for context, Korosensei. But still, it was a good motivation for them. Not that any of them beat him that day, or the next one, but it gave them something to fight for.
They were assassins. And their target, was their sensei.
Then the scene changed. She was back at her room in her mother's house, locked in. Her body ached in pain, and she could feel the carpet scraping her bare arms, which only made her wounds more painful. Nagisa remembered that day too, and unfortunately it wasn't one of the worst scenarios she had found herself into through the years.
It had happened when she was... what, thirteen years old? Nagisa was almost sure she was. That day she had come home to find out her grades had arrived. To say her mother wasn't pleased with them was an understatement, and what happened next...
When Nagisa entered the apartment, it was al relatively normal. The usual clinic environment welcomed her as always, and the smell of dinner made her stomach grumble. It smelled really good, and she had to admit that her mother did cook spectacularly when she wanted to.
Now, that was the thing. What was the special occasion? Nagisa usually made sure to know everything that may happen, and that day she didn't recall having anything to do. Or rather, her mother having anything to do. That was something Nagisa had grown used to. To be led by her mother's agenda, that is. The only times when she could escape it was when she was with Karma... but at the time they weren't on speaking terms any longer, so Nagisa had gone back to her boring, controlled life. She hated it.
'But what else can I do?' nothing. She could do nothing else, and that was something Nagisa had to remember to herself from time to time. Her mother was everything she had, she couldn't just live her. Her mother needed her.
"Okaasan, I'm home." she said as she closed the door behind her, leaving her things in her room and then entering the kitchen to kiss her mother on the cheek. "How was your day?"
"Oh, Nagisa-chan! Your hair looks so pretty like that! Who braided it?" Hiromi looked stunned with the pretty hairstyle Nagisa was using that day. Kurahashi-chan, a girl from C Class, had asked if she could braid it that day at lunch, and Nagisa had said yes, thinking it could please her mother to see her being more girly-like, or something like that. It wasn't as if she had something better to do, anyways...
"A girl from another class. She offered to braid it, and I thought it would look pretty. I'm glad you like it." if Nagisa was being honest with herself, she didn't give a damn about the braid. She had only agreed to it in order to please her mother, because she knew Hiromi would be happier if she saw her with a pretty hairstyle, rather than her usual low ponytail. But she would never say that out loud, especially not in front of her mother.
"Oh, Nagisa-chan, you have a beautiful hair. I'm glad you decided to care for it more often." that meant, Nagisa would need to start using pretty hairstyles from time to time to please her. It was what always happened.
"Alright." was everything she said. Better not to fight her, 'cuz even if she wasn't on one if her phases at the moment, that could change any second. "Do you need any help with dinner, okaasan?"
"No sweetie, I'm almost done. Go change that hideous uniform of yours, I bought you something I saw today at the mall, will you use it for mommy?" it sounded like a question, but Nagisa knew it was an order, so she just nodded. "Oh, and your grades arrived. We'll check them before dinner." now pale, Nagisa managed to stumble some words out, practically running to her room.
Fuck. Her grades had been awful, worse than normal. Ever since Karma had stopped hanging out with her, Nagisa had had more trouble concentrating. Her mind was always wondering what had she done to make him stop talking to her. Had he realized she was boring and plain? That there was no real reason for them to hang out?
Well, now that had come back to bite her in the ass. Her mother was going to go insane when she saw her grades. They were just mid-terms, but Hiromi Shiota always expected the best.
'Just another thing I've failed at.' she thought bitterly. Because with her mother, she would never be anything but a failure.
Sighting, Nagisa looked at the dress waiting for her on her bed. It was pretty, she'll give her mother that. It was white, tight at her chest and waist area, and then freely falling down to her knees. The neckline was heart-shaped, and the braces were thin. It was light and it gave her a fresh appearance, something not all of the dresses her mother bought for her did. She actually looked pretty in it.
She hated it.
She didn't want to wear girly clothes. She was totally OK with a pair a jeans, a t-shirt and a comfy sweatshirt. Even her hair bothered her. She had been wanting to cut it for three years now, but her mother didn't let her. She didn't let her do much, if she as being honest.
Sometimes, she wondered how good it would be if she just cut her hair, burned all her dresses, and just do whatever the hell she wanted to. To just ignore what her mother wanted her to be.
'But she's sick. I can't do that to her, not after dad left.' of course, there was that. Without her father, Nagisa was everything her mother had left. She couldn't just do what she wanted, it would break her.
So she sucked it up, straightened up her new pretty dress, and put on a smile. Her mother didn't like it when she sulked, said it would ruin her expression lines or something like that.
"Look at you! My precious little girl looks so beautiful!" Hiromi grabbed her hands, making Nagisa twirl around so she could get a better look. "If you just used the things I buy for you more often... you would be the envy of every single girl..." Nagisa just let her ramble, as it was her usual course of action. "Now, set the table while I go to get your grades. They're in my room."
"Hi, okaasan." Hiromi's smile was wide and happy. Extremely happy. That was her mother, always at the edge. She could be tremendously happy... or furious, there was no 'in between' with her.
So Nagisa, already making a plan for when her mother saw her grades, set the table as quickly as she could, and then took some food from the kitchen, threw it somewhere inside her room before shutting it and getting back to the dinning room. Just seconds later, Hiromi entered the room, a sealed letter in her hands.
"Sorry I took so long, Nagisa-chan. I have a lot of papers to sort out for work. But don't worry, I already reorganized everything so we could take a closer look to this." cursing silently as her mother approached, Nagisa forced a smile.
"Thank you, okaasan, but I know you're busy. We could wait until you finish everything you have to do, I can wait." Nagisa tried her best to look appealing, but her mother just waved her off, like she usually did.
"Oh, don't worry, Nagisa-chan. For you I can make time, you're my only daughter, after all." Nagisa took her eyes from her mother and sat down at the table. She was so screwed...
"Nagisa...?" the bluenette frowned when a third voice joined the conversation. "Nagisa, wake up..." wake up? She wasn't asleep.
The image started to get dizzy as her name was called over an over again. Who was it? There was no one else in the apartment besides her mother and Nagisa herself. She could feel someone shaking her left shoulder, but when she looked in that direction she found no one. What was going on?
Her mother wasn't talking anymore. She wasn't moving either. She was just staring, frozen in the middle of the room.
"Nagisa, c'mon. It's late, and we still gotta find Tama-chan and Haru-chan..." Tama-chan...? Tamaki and Haruhi? Had something happened to them? Last time she checked, they were just fine...
Opening her eyes widely, Nagisa inhaled sharply, not recognizing her surroundings. There was someone touching her, it was saying something. But Nagisa couldn't get what it was, her dream was mixing with reality. Had her mother locked her in somewhere she didn't know? When? Where was she? And why was someone touching her?
Her breathing started to go faster, her heart pumping faster each second that passed.
She didn't want to be there. She wanted to go home, she wanted to be safe. How had she ended up like that again after all these time? She had thought her mother couldn't reach her anymore... after Korosensei had helped her, Nagisa didn't think she would see one of her phases again... she wanted to be safe again... she wanted Korosensei.
Then she felt a pair of arms wrapped around her, pulling her closer to whoever was there. Nagisa's ears buzzed, and her vision was blurred for the tears and the fear. But slowly, all that stopped. She could hear again, and she could see too. She was inside Ouran's enormous vent system, she remembered now. And the arms holding her... they were Mitsukuni's. Mitsukuni was there. He was with her. She was safe.
She was safe.
"You better now?" the bluenette noticed he didn't say 'OK', he said 'better'. But it was fine, because she wasn't OK.
"Yeah... thank you." they stayed like that for a while, Mitsukuni's embrace, calming Nagisa down. His slow heart beat helped her normalise her own. "How did you find me?"
"You were talking in your sleep, and you leave the grid open, so taking it that we were playing hide and seek, it wasn't that hard to put everything together. Besides, if someone would be inside the vents, that would be you. I don't think anyone else knows how to get in." Nagisa giggled, nodding. He had a point. All those rich heirs wouldn't lower themselves enough to get inside the vents. Even if they were the nicer vents she had ever been inside of. "We need to get back. The Newspaper Club has been taken care of, but Tama-chan and Haru-chan are still missing, so I'll tell you what happened while we go catch up with the others. They said Tama-chan had probably gone to the Rose's Labyrinth, and knowing him he took Haru-chan with him." Nagisa just nodded, and the two of them got down to the Club Room. When they were both at the same floor level, Mitsukuni hold her hand tight, not letting it go even after they found Tamaki and Haruhi.
When Tamaki asked about the Newspaper Club, the others shamelessly lied about it, telling him that they wouldn't be able to make it. Maybe it was bad to lie, but she agreed with their decision. Tamaki saw the best in everyone, even if there wasn't really anything good to see. None of them wanted that to change anytime soon.
Because of that, when the day was over, and Nagisa was sitting alone in her couch, she smiled, knowing she finally had the chance to be happy. She had the Assassination Classroom, Karasuma-sensei and Bitch-sensei, and she had the Host Club. She had Mitsukuni. Korosensei would always be missing, she knew it would, but Nagisa couldn't have asked for more right now.
'Cuz yes, maybe she wasn't OK. But she would be.
Only a week later did Nagisa accepted Mitsukuni's offer. She knew it was the best for her, and that her boyfriend was just trying to help, but it was tough. To admit out loud that she wasn't alright.
But Mitsukuni had promised he would be with her the whole process, that he wouldn't leave her alone. That was reassuring, and it made her feel better. Maybe her mother had turned her new life upside down again, but at least her friends and boyfriend—her family, were by her side.
So now she was inside of a medical center, top class of course. Mitsukuni hadn't let her chose anything less than that. It looked pretty clean, but the paintings and splashes of color made the place a bit warmer. Nagisa hated clinical environments...
The whole place was, of course, expensive. It would have made Nagisa uncomfortable if it wasn't for the fact that she was already used to it by now, for her demise. Damn those rich bastards.
'But you love them anyways.' unfortunately, she did indeed. Even when most of the time they were oblivious (read: everyone but Kyoya and Mori), and tended to just speak their minds without thinking about how it could hurt someone (again, read: everyone but Kyoya and Mori), they had their heart on the right place. And for that, Nagisa would be forever grateful.
"You OK?" Nagisa's blue eyes stopped analysing her surroundings, and instead focused on Mitsukuni. After a moment, she nodded. "If you want, I can come in with you, but it's totally your call."
"I think I'll manage, but thank you." even if Nagisa would have wanted him there with her, this was something she needed to do on her own. Support? Nagisa welcomed every piece of ti. But it was her job to get better. And she would.
"Then I'll be waiting for you right here, OK?" Mitsukuni pulled her closer, and then gently kissed her forehead. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."
And so, when her name was called, Nagisa straightened up, walking to the door without hesitation. Only before the closed behind her, she looked back, finding the reassuring smile on Mitsukuni's face. And that, she decided, was all she needed.
The room she entered was... nice, she supposed. It was warm, the illumination wasn't overwhelming, and the decoration matched. There were two cushions and a table in the middle, and there was a tea set placed on a tray. Waiting for her at the door, was who Nagisa supposed was the psychologist. She was pretty, with average high—towering over Nagisa, of course—, short brown hair, brown eyes and a soft expression. She wore an elegant dress that showed off her figure nicely, and a thin jacket was neatly folded at one of the cushions. Besides it, Nagisa noted, was a pen and a notebook, probably for the woman to write down all she saw about her so she wouldn't miss a thing.
Her attention was brought back to the woman in question when she spoke.
"You must be Nagisa. It's nice to meet you." the fact that she used her given name made Nagisa realise the woman had done her homework. "My name is Akano Yuki, but you can call me Yuki if you want." her voice was soft, and her tone calmed. Nagisa decided she was nice as well.
"Thank you for having me, Yuki-san, I..." Nagisa didn't know what to say next. Did she talk? About what? Was she supposed to tell her why she was there or did she already know? Nagisa had no idea how that thing of seeing a psychologist worked, or anyone related to the mental area, for that matter.
"You can talk about whatever you want to, Nagisa. This is a safe place, and I promise I won't tell anyone what you say here unless you give me permission to, OK?" Nagisa slowly nodded, taking in the information. "Now, we don't need to talk about the specific reason you came here. Only what you are comfortable sharing with me."
"That doesn't sound that bad..." Yuki-san laughed, and Nagisa outlined the beginning of a smile.
Gakushuu's eyes narrowed in suspicion when he saw Nagisa fidgeting. She was nervous. Why?
Some time had passed since little Nagisa had gotten a boyfriend, so it couldn't be that, right? Okay, it had been less than a month before, but still, his friend was better than that. Maybe it was something related to her mother? Gakushuu knew Hiromi had entered a mental facility, and that she was being treated with psychotherapy, lock-down and meds 24/7. He knew too that her mother was still a bit of a sore spot for her. The bluenette herself had started with a psychologist a couple days ago, but still, it wasn't something they brought up in every conversation they had.
But maybe it had something to do with all the former E Class of Kunugigaoka plus Ren and himself gathering up together... Nagisa could be nervous about telling them something...
"Hey, Asano, did you know those two were dating?" Gakushuu's purple eyes leaved Nagisa to look at Maehara, who was shamelessly pointing at Okano with... Ren.
"I had no idea." he said, expressionless.
'Bastard's gonna hear it. He forced me to tell him everything about Karma!' yes, Gakushuu was so going to give hell to that son of a bit... her amazing mother.
A couple of minutes later, everyone was there. Nobody ever ditched one of their meetings, that being the reason it was pretty hard to schedule them. They weren't all together anymore, and everyone had different things to do every day, so coming up with a day, an hour and a place that was good for everyone was actually quite a handful to accomplish.
The meeting went smoothly, as always, everyone was catching up with everyone, and there was never someone alone for more than three seconds. They texted everyday, but it was different to actually talk to one another in person.
But, even while he yelled a Ren for being such an asshole, Gakushuu couldn't help but notice that Nagisa was still nervous, looking around as to make sure of something. She was analysing them all, he realised after a while. But why?
He got his answer an hour later, when everybody had settled down. Nagisa, who was talking with Kayano and Okuda, stood up, and called everyone to get their attention.
"What's the matter, Nagisa? Some assassination you need help with?" the fact that the whole Assassination Classroom seemed so exited at the possibility made Gakushuu wonder if his friends were alright.
"I'm afraid that's not the case this time, Masayoshi." the whispers of disappointment only made Gakushuu reassure his hypothesis. "I'm gonna tell him." the room went silent almost immediately. She didn't specified, but she didn't need to, either. Everybody knew what she meant. "I was hoping you would agree. I don't wanna do it if you don't want to."
"You sure?" Isogai was serious, but didn't look mad. He was just worried.
"I wouldn't think of it if I didn't know it was OK, Yuuma." Nagisa didn't hesitate, and the former E Class took that as a sign.
"Then do as you think best." Nakamura winked at her, and Gakushuu smiled a bit. "When?"
Nagisa's expression dropped at once.
"I'm still trying to work that part of the plan out. I mean, I won't do it tomorrow, if that's what you're asking. I still need time. But I needed your approval first." everyone smiled at that. Of course, Nagisa would be the one asking for permission, even when it should have to be the other way around. She was top of their class' 'special assignments', after all.
"I think it's the right call, Nagisa. If he's as good as you've told us, then he's worth it." said Okuda, pushing up her glasses to her nose's bridge.
"I still want to meet him. I've heard almost everything about this Mitsukuni guy, but I've never seen him. That needs to change, Nagisa." the bluenette paled as everyone started to comment about how they wanted to meet her boyfriend too.
"Maybe anther time, guys." that meant 'when I tell him. I don't want him to meet you without knowing the whole story.' And they understood. She wanted him to see them as they truly were, not a non-assassin version of themselves.
"I'm not gonna forget that, Nagisa." she short assassin groaned when Kataoka wrote it done.
She loved her friends. But sometimes—many times, she had the urge to kill them so they couldn't embarrass her.
And that, my friends, it's the end of the story. I thought about it, and I realized an open end would suit this rather well. I hoped you liked it, and thanks to all the ones who stuck with me 'till the end. I'm gonna miss writing about this everyday...
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So I hope you didn't believe that, because if you did I'll be disappointed. I'm not done here, thank you very much.
What do you think about Nagisa's dream? I was planning on actually ending the scene, but I think we already know what would happen, so I leaved it there. And the psychologist, what do you think about that?
Also, I may not deliver much information related to time, but that's mostly because I still don't understand how Japan's educational system works. That and Hatori Bisco's confusing schemes. She herself said to ignore the time-line for the manga's well being, so I don't know how to proceed now *mind blows up*. Anyways, that's it. I'll just go with what the manga tells me, and hope it makes sense somehow...
That would all for now. See ya' next chapter!
Patolemus.