Forty-Caliber Bread Crumb

Crying was a way to express his feelings, he cried many times in his life. When his mother died, when his friends in Afghanistan died and now the tears that were falling were dedicated to Terry. Another one of his best friends. The two of them had come really close the past weeks that they were working together, they shared their adventures at war, their daily lives. Damn... Terry was so happy that he was going to be a father… But everything's gone now, his kid will never meet him...

Jay wasn't sure how much time he spent crying on the floor in the lockers' room. The dim light of the chamber was essential for him to mourn, to break. Guilt was written all over his face, the feeling of being unable to save his friend was eating him alive. No matter how hard he tried to contain his emotions, in the end, no one could stop him from collapsing. He stayed there sobbing until the screeching of the door made him turn his gaze towards the male figure standing in front of him and attempt to stand.

"Don't… There is no need to…" The man joined him on the floor cracking a sympathetic smile.

"What are you doing here?" He inquired. His voice was hoarse from the endless hours of crying but it didn't matter.

"Making sure you are alright. You were really eager to run away from my office earlier."

"I am…" He replied taking a deep breath looking at the blank space in front of him.

"Are you Jay?"

Jay eyed him smiling. From his red eyes, the man could figure out that the detective had been crying his guts out.

"It's hard… When you lose a friend…"

"I know… I lost a couple in Afghanistan."

"I know you did. So if you ever want to talk about it, I am here…"

"Look, I don't want to bother you with my life, I am sure you have plenty of things to be preoccupied with…"

"Hey… What I said before… I meant it, I am really lucky to have you in my unit. Look, Jay, you are not only a good cop but an amazing person. Erin is really lucky to have you in her life and I am too… I just want you to see me as a father figure too, not only as your boss."

Jay's look revealed his surprise. For the first time in years, Voight actually talked to him.

"You know… Back in Afghanistan, before the convoy that almost kill us, Mouse and I were injured in a firefight… Actually it was Mouse, Tony and I. We were in the patrol when they suddenly threw fire at us, we tried to defend ourselves but we were outnumbered… So… long story short, Tony was instantly killed when three bullets literally ripped his skin, Mouse got a bullet to the leg and I got two in the chest... After a while the fire stopped, we were left alone with my buddy. Despite his injury, he carried me for I am sure how many miles until we were rescued… That's all I can remember. Five days later, I woke up in the army hospital facing the most beautiful woman I've ever met." He chuckled at the last part. "They said I was lucky… but Tony was gone. He left four kids behind… He was laying there and I did nothing to save him, like I did nothing for Terry. I fail everyone whom I love, Sarge."

The tears returned in his eyes, stronger than ever. He sobbed hard pulling his knees closer to his chest covering his face. Voight sat closer to him, wrapping his arm around his man's shoulders, giving him a hug.

"You helped Terry as much as you could, you caught the man who killed him, heck, you almost got killed for him…" He said pointing at the scratch on his face.

"If you consider that an injury, you should have seen how I was when I was transferred back in Chicago after my discharge." Jay laughed breaking from the hug, keeping his own distance.

"What I am trying to point out here, is that your heart is so huge, you would die for the people you love."

"Thanks…For the comfort." Jay whispered swapping the tears away.

"Always!" Voight stood up from the cold floor, stretching his body. "I think I'm getting old.,. My back already hurts. Do you wanna hang out to an old man's house?"

"Sure let's go."

After arranging all the undone work at the office, the two men exited the district walking to their cars, getting in and driving away.

He had been in Hank's house once or twice with Erin but never alone… Walking in, he noticed a photo of his Sargeant kissing a woman. Camille. He imagined. After listening so many stories about her, he kinda wished they would have crossed paths once in a lifetime.

"She was one of a kind."

"Huh?" He turned to his boss startled.

"Camille."

"You must have been very in love with her."

"You have no idea."

Getting the old bear of Hank's hand, he moved to the living chair sitting on the couch taking a sip from the bottle, observing the place carefully. The photos of Justin and Erin laying on the two sides of the TV, a small bar a couple of meters later.

"So?" Voight asked.

"What?"

"Any other stories with you and Mouse?"

"Why do you wanna know?"

"I am just curious…"

Jay laughed. Recounting stories from war wasn't easy for him, he was afraid that maybe opening his heart to someone, would turn in the dark side again. But today was different… Today he felt the need to talk, he felt the need to get help. It didn't matter if it was from his Sargeant.

Hello! How are you guys? I am back with a new chapter based on episode 3x17 which is one of my favorites. I always cry while watching it. Hope you are all safe, thank you for your likes, follows, comments, love you all! 3

~The Fourth Bionic~