EDITED 5/30/2020
Clary blinked and Wesley had somehow moved to be lying next to her, reading a book with her tucked into his side and a hand carding through her hair.
"What?" Clary sat up.
"Hey.. how do you feel?" Wesley set the book aside and turned in to her.
"Tingly." Clary blew her breath through her nose and allowed Wesley to thread his fingers through hers. She noticed that he had left his glamour down and it made her smile. "It's like there's something under my skin trying to get out."
"That's your magic." He said. Wesley grabbed a piece of her hair and brought it around for her to see.
"My hair is blue?" Clary asked, looking down at it and touching it.
"Not completely." Wesley said. "Looks like highlights."
Wesley ran a hand over her head and pressed a kiss to her forehead, nose and lips. "I'm going to take a shower and then bring you some food. Want me to wake him up for you?" He nodded over to Magnus who was asleep in the armchair next to the bed.
"I'll do it." Clary sat up.
"Okay." Wesley got up and headed towards the door. "Salad or grilled cheese?"
"Mm. Grilled cheese."
"Got it." He left the room and Clary pushed the blankets off of her. She swung her feet over the edge of her bed. She adjusted her short shorts that had rode up on her thighs and pulled down her black t-shirt that had rode up to show her stomach. She noticed the lack of runes on her skin and she couldn't bring herself to miss them.
Clary moved over to where Magnus was sitting, and she contemplated how to wake him. She decided the good-old-fashioned shake of the shoulder would work. She reached over and touched him, and as soon as she did she felt a blinding pain go through her head and she doubled over. She was pretty sure she cried out because Magnus startled awake. He looked at her with panic in his eyes and grabbed her by the arms.
He was saying something, his mouth was moving but her vision was getting darker and her ears were ringing. Magnus stood up just as she passed out and fell into his arms.
Alec ran into the room to see his husband standing in front of the armchair, his sister unconscious in his arms.
"What happened?" Alec jogged up and looked at her pale face. "I heard screaming."
"I don't know." Magnus brushed past him and put her back on the bed. "I woke up to her standing over me, screaming."
"Could something have gone wrong with the ritual?" Alec said. "It looked fine to me, but I don't remember most of mine."
Wesley ran into the room, hair still wet. "What the hell happened? She was just fine! She was talking and everything."
"I don't know!" Magnus leaned over her only to have Clary sit straight up and knock him in the head. "Ah, damn it." He cursed.
Clary stared at him for a long moment before throwing herself into his arms and beginning to sob.
"What's going on?" Alec murmured to Wesley.
Wesley shook his head, looking completely lost. He looked helpless. "I wish I knew."
"No, Clary you can't go in there." Magnus chased the three-year-old into his work room.
Every time he turned his back when he turned around again there was a tiny flash of red rounding a corner.
"But I wanna!"
"Just because you want to, doesn't mean that you should, Biscuit." Magnus grabbed her and knelt in front of her. "I'm not telling you no because I want to, okay? I'm just trying to keep you safe. Do you want to go paint? I can get the paint out. I bought some pretty new brushes. Do you want to do that?"
"Yes, please, Daddy." Clary held her arms up to him and Magnus felt his heart stutter at the title the little girl had just bestowed upon him. He looked down at her green eyes, watching him patiently and waiting for her silent request to be fulfilled.
Magnus scooped the girl up and whisked her off to the living room.
"Auntie Tess!" Clary whined as Tessa pulled her hair again.
"I know, I'm sorry sweetie." She tied off the braid. "There we go. Why don't you go show Daddy your pretty braids?"
Clary hopped off the chair and ran into the kitchen where Magnus was setting the table.
"Daddy! Lookie!" She spun around and made the braids flare out as she spun.
Magnus grinned and picked her up, continuing to set the forks down. "Well, don't you look absolutely beautiful? You're like a little Princess."
"Obviously!" Clary said gesturing with her hand.
"She really is your daughter." Tessa laughed when she entered the room.
"Obviously." Magnus smiled.
"No!" Clary wailed, reaching for Magnus as her mother tried to make Clary leave with her.
"Clary, just go. It's alright." Magnus was trying to soothe her.
"No! I wanna stay with Daddy! Please Mommy. I want to stay with Daddy!"
Jocelyn froze and looked at Magnus who looked back at her in horror. Clary had never called him that in front of her mother and Magnus hadn't informed Jocelyn of the development.
The woman promptly burst into tears. "Jocelyn." Magnus gasped as Clary broke free of her mother and launched herself into Magnus' arms. Magnus wrapped his arms around Clary as she pulled herself up, close to him by wrapping her arms around his neck and using that as leverage. "I'm sorry."
"No." She shook her head. "Don't be. It's better you than anyone else."
"But I thought, Luke?" Magnus shook his head a little in confusion.
"Absolutely not." Jocelyn said, venom in the words. "If something happens to me, if Valentine finds me, Magnus you have to take care of my daughter - our daughter - she's ours now. She loves you. Do not let Luke, or Valentine or anyone else take claim to her, you hear me? If I'm not there, it has to be you. I need it to be you."
"Uncle Ragnor." Clary whined, running over to where Magnus and Ragnor were sitting together on the bench at the park.
She grabbed his hand and pulled lightly. "Can you push me on the swings?"
"Oh," Ragnor looked over at Magnus, a sort of shock and fear in his eyes. "Um, I suppose."
He stood up and allowed the five-year-old to drag him by the hand over to the swing set.
After a moment's hesitation, Magnus pushed himself up and followed the pair.
"Daddy!" Six-year-old Clary ran into the room sobbing. "Daddy! I'm dying."
"What?" Magnus knelt down in front of her and held her at arm's length, looking for injuries. "What do you mean? Where are you hurt?"
"In here!" She pointed to her mouth and then opened up her fisted hand. Magnus glanced at her mouth for a second, it was just barely open, before looking down at what was in her palm.
"Oh, honey." He cooed, picking the tooth up out of her hand. "You aren't dying, you're just becoming a big girl.
"A big girl?" Clary mumbled uncertainly.
"Mmhm." Magnus nodded. "Big girls lose their baby teeth and in a while, you'll grow big girl teeth."
"I'm not dying?" Clary asked.
"No, baby." Magnus pulled her into a hug. "You aren't dying."
"It hurts!" The nine-year-old wailed.
Magnus struggled to keep her leg steady so that he could heal it. She had tripped at the park and broken her leg. He immediately portaled her back to his loft and laid her down on the couch, intent on healing it. "I know, princess I know. Just hold still so Daddy can fix it."
Clary seemed to settle on just lying there, whimpering and Magnus ran a blue glowing hand over her broken leg and watched as it healed, hearing the little click as the bone went back to its rightful place.
"All better, see?" Magnus said setting his hand on her leg and smiling up at her.
Clary sat up and peered down at the offending leg. "Where's the band-aid?"
"Oh, that's right." Magnus nodded. "Silly me. I forgot." He magicked up a pink band-aid and put it on her leg over the spot where the break occurred. "And I can't forget the magic kiss either." He pressed a kiss to the band aid and then pulled her off the couch.
"Come on. Let's go bake some dessert for after dinner. Do you want cookies or brownies?"
"Brownies so we can have brownie sundaes!"
"Brownie sundaes it is."
Ten-year-old Clary was playing near a creek in the park that her dad always brought her to, but this time she was there with her mom. She was pretending the stuffed mermaid that Auntie Tess said Clary's brother, Raphael, had sent her was swimming in the water.
She had noticed a frog and made the mermaid wave to it, when suddenly something jumped out of the water towards her. It was ugly and it was scary, and Clary wished that her Dad was there, because her Dad always protected her from the monsters under her bed, surely he would protect her from this as well.
But then it was gone, and her mom was standing behind her. "Come on." Her mom grabbed her hand and dragged her across town to her Dad's apartment and knocked on the door incessantly. "Magnus!" She yelled.
Magnus let them in and questioned Jocelyn. "What happened? Is she alright?"
"A demon attacked her in the park." Jocelyn informed him. "You need to wipe her memories again."
"How many times are you going to make my daughter forget me?" Magnus demanded. "She may not be mine biologically, Jocelyn. But she practically lives here. I have raised her. You continue to force me to erase myself out of her life! I love her, you have made her my child and you continue to not only torture me but deceive her."
"I'll find another warlock, then." Jocelyn said. "You really want another warlock messing around in her mind? I'll do whatever it takes."
"Mom?" Clary looked at her mother but seemed to decide that there was no reaching her. "Daddy, I'm scared."
"It's okay honey." Jocelyn soothed. "It's for the best."
"You're not protecting her!" Magnus snapped. "You're deceiving her."
"For as long as possible." Jocelyn nodded.
"She won't be a child forever, Jocelyn." Magnus told her slowly, as if he were talking to a child.
"For now, I don't want her to be a part of our world." Jocelyn shot back.
"Dad, I don't wanna do this." Clary told him.
"Please!" Jocelyn begged. "Take her memories."
Magnus looked down at the little girl and with mournful eyes, he did as he was asked.
"Yeah, that right there." Magnus pointed to a sixteen-year-old Clary Fray's eyelid. "smudge it."
"Smudge it?" She asked incredulously. "But I just perfected it!"
Magnus shook his head. "You want it to look natural. It looks too perfect. Unfortunately, there is such a thing as too perfect. Don't ruin it or mess it up. You just want to smudge it to blend it a little."
"Fine." Clary reached up and rubbed the edge of her eyelid until the brown eyeshadow smudged a little. Magnus had been right; it did look better.
"There you go." He smiled. He plucked an eyeliner pencil off of the counter and handed it to her.
"Whatever." She laughed.
"Clary?" Magnus rubbed her back. "What is it?"
"Clary are you alright?" Alec hovered by Magnus' side.
"Sweetheart, what happened?" Wesley asked desperately.
"Guys." Magnus looked at the two men. "How about we give her some space? Go make lunch or something."
"You'll call if something happens?" Wesley hesitated. Alec was already on his way out of the door, trusting his husband.
"You know I will." Magnus said. Magnus moved the two of them over to the bed and laid down. "Clary?" He asked quietly, positioning her so that her head was resting on his chest. "Honey what's happening?"
"All this time." She cried, "All this time, I thought it was my mother. Baking and painting, braiding my hair and giving my cuts and scrapes magic kisses. It was you, not her."
She could feel Magnus freeze underneath her. "You - you remember?" He asked, and Clary could hear the disbelief in his voice and the hope.
"I remember, dad." She cried, fisting his silk shirt in her hand and crying quietly, gasping for breath as she did so. The tears falling onto his shirt.
"Oh, God." Magnus cried, holding her closer. "Oh my God."
He sat up and pulled her up and into his chest, wrapping his arms around her pressing his face into the top of her head. Clary could feel the tears soak into her scalp. She tightened her arms around him and continued to cry. "I'm so sorry." She sobbed. "I'm so sorry."
"For what?" He carded his fingers through her hair. "What could you possibly be sorry for?"
"The things I've said." Clary explained. "I've been horrible."
"You didn't know." Magnus pulled back and looked her in the eyes. "It isn't your fault, sweetheart. It's mine and your mother's."
Clary shook her head. "So much makes sense now."
"Like what?" Magnus' brow furrowed.
"Simon!" Clary called as the four Shadowhunters entered the room and saw Raphael Santiago with a dagger to the mundane's throat.
"Clary!" Jace grabbed her by the arm. "Stop. That's not going to do any good."
"Listen to him, Clary Fairchild." The vampire was looking at her strangely. His eyes flickering back and forth between her and the surly archer next to her. "Put it away. I've had more than enough of your friend for one day. I'd love to cut his throat. Don't give me a reason. Put it away!"
His eyes hardly left either Clary or Alec.
Magnus nodded. "You already know that Raphael knows you. He had just as much of a hand in your childhood as Tessa and I,"
"The mermaid doll I used to have." Clary smiled. "He gave that to me. I remember."
"Yes, you do," Magnus marveled. "He recognized both you and Alexander the moment you stepped foot in the Dumort. He called me later to let me know. But he got Simon out of there to help the both of you."
"Come with me, Clary." The glittery warlock she'd only just met asked of her. He reached out and touched her arm, his eyes serious. "My lair could offer you protection no Shadowhunter ever could."
Jace scoffed and Clary jerked back. "No!" She said, not noticing the hurt that flashed through his eyes. "No, I'm going anywhere with you."
"Don't be a fool." He pressed. "Your mother would want you to live."
"Then help me get my memories back, from whatever demon you gave them to."
"Valentine is hunting you too." Magnus ignored her words, seemingly pleading with her to go with him. "And every moment we're outside my lair's protection is a moment Valentine gets closer to finding us."
He turned and made a portal behind him before turning back towards her and extending a hand. "Come with me." Clary looked down at his hand before turning to Jace who shook his head. "I won't offer again." Magnus warned.
"No."
"I didn't have an exact plan," Magnus admitted. "But if you all hadn't shown up at my lair later that night, I was going to come and find you and return your memories myself."
"Really?" Clary asked.
"I wasn't going to let my daughter mess around with a bunch of Shadowhunters," Magnus told her seriously. "Even if your - I mean my soulmate was among them. He didn't know at that time; he couldn't protect you properly. I wasn't going to leave anything up to chance, not with you."
Clary was kneeling next to Magnus' couch, staring down at Luke. He was unconscious and hurt. The man that poured her cereal, that sang her to sleep at night when she was scared, the man that taught her to tie her shoelaces and her ABCs and how to read. That man was lying on the couch in front of her dying.
"You okay?" Simon asked from behind her as Magnus Bane was fluttering around in the next room.
Clary nodded silently, her eyes not leaving Luke's face.
"Hey . . ." Simon said, moving to rest his hands on her shoulders. "It's me. I know how much he means to you."
Clary stood up and turned towards Simon. "How could I have ever doubted him? Simon, he's the only father I've ever known."
There was a clatter of something tipping over in the room Magnus was in and Clary looked up at him only to find him looking at her with an unreadable expression.
"You heard that, didn't you?"
"Luke didn't deserve how much you worshiped him, but your mother was insistent despite what she had said about preferring me being your father figure over him." Magnus griped, looking upset. "I am your father, not Luke, not Valentine. Me. And I know you didn't remember, and that's okay. I don't blame you."
"Dad.."
"You're my little girl. I raised you. You spent more time here than anywhere else. You spent more time with me than anyone else." Magnus shook his head. "I shouldn't be unloading this on you, I'm the parent here, you're my child not my friend. I shouldn't be pouring my troubles and feelings out to you."
"I'm sorry that I've hurt you these past few months." Clary told him quietly.
Magnus brushed a strand of her long, black hair out of her eyes. "None of that matters." Magnus told her. "I'd let you torture and kill me if it meant you'd get a single moment of happiness. That's what being a parent is. One day, you'll understand."
"Ever since I found out that Valentine is my father, I wondered how my mother could be married to someone like that, and why she stayed. She had to stop him." She looked up at Magnus and saw him watching her cautiously.
"And safeguard the cup." He nodded. "Everything that Jocelyn did, she did to save the people she'd sworn to protect. She took her oath as a Shadowhunter seriously."
"I understand." Clary said, exasperated. "But how does that help me find the cup."
Magnus couldn't seem to look her in the eyes. "Maybe Luke thinks if you know your mother better, you'll know where she hid it."
"Then tell me why she gave up being a Shadowhunter."
Magnus kneeled down next to her, going to touch her but apparently thinking better of it. "Because the one thing in the world she loved more is you. She had to protect you."
"From my father, the lunatic." Magnus looked away slowly and sadly.
"I'll look after Simon." Raphael told Clary kindly after Simon rushed off. Tears were in her eyes as she turned to look at him, trembling. "You have my word."
Clary didn't understand why the vampire was being so kind to her, from what Jace had told her, Raphael was mean and didn't care about anyone but himself. But the vampire was being kind to her, looking at her like he cared.
"It's all about presentation and quality produce." Raphael told the two caged friends. "You see, us vampires look after one another. We take care of our family."
It was a pointed comment as he looked straight at Clary. His expression seemed smug but there was an underlying emotion in his eyes that Clary couldn't identify, she didn't know him well enough.
"Simon already has a family." She shot back.
"Had a family."
Magnus laughed and Clary looked at him strangely. "Why is that funny?" She asked. "He's seemed to hate me ever since I joined up with the Shadowhunters."
"Raphael couldn't show you any favoritism without raising questions. Especially with the other Downworlders seeking you out, the werewolves even going as far as to kidnap you." Magnus took a steadying breath. "He did what he could to protect you. Not letting Luke into the Dumort, trying to dissuade you from entering, he wasn't being difficult, he was trying to protect you. If I recall his complaints correctly, when he returned Simon to you, you and your friends killed a lot of vampires. His people were angry with you and would have killed you if given the chance. Raphael was trying to protect you. Putting you in the cage with Simon was another way to protect you, he would've sooner killed Simon than let him drain you, you should know better than that, now. And the jab about family, I think that Raphael was trying in his own way to jog your memory."
"He was trying to remind me that we're family. Him, me and you."
"I know things are complicated, now." Magnus told her. "I'm married to your biological brother, who was Raphael's father before you were born, and Madzie knows you as Aunt Clary. It's all very complicated. But I will always be your father and Raphael will always be your brother. We won't accept anything less. It's up to you and Alexander how your relationship changes, if you want him to continue being your brother, or if you decide you want him to be your other father. I'm not going to push; all I care about is that you remember me."
He kissed her forehead again and Clary smiled.
"We'll have to talk. I'm honestly just confused, and overwhelmed. What if Alec finds this all to be weird? It's weird isn't it?"
"Alexander loves you." Magnus told her. "I love you; Raphael loves you. Madzie and Catarina and Tessa and Wesley. We all love you. That's all that matters. Just talk to him, biscuit."
"Fine." Clary nodded.