EDITED 5/30/2020

So as you can see above, you cannot be mad at me for the last chapter ending because I was encouraged. ^^^^

Hours later, Magnus had just sent Catarina and Wesley home, standing in the living room. Cat and Wes had settled James, because the man in that room was not his husband, in Magnus and Alec's old bedroom. That thought alone made Magnus' heart throb painfully. Why couldn't the two of them just catch a break?

Catarina had explained that while she had healed all of Alec's physical injuries, she could find no cause for his amnesia. There was no apparent reason that Alec should be experiencing this lapse of memory. Catarina's words discouraged Magnus greatly, at this point he was just resigned to the fact that he was destined to continue losing his soulmate. Magnus' friends had reassured him that they would do everything in their power to find a cure. However, this did not make the warlock feel any better. For all they knew, they could be searching for years upon years for a cure. After all, thanks to the ritual, they had eternity to find one.

Magnus sighed heavily in the silence of the living room before he turned to go to the bedroom, imaging all the negative energy leaving his body and breathing in some positive energy in its place. In the master bedroom, he found James laying shirtless on his back, looking like he was waiting for Magnus. The man smiled up at him as he walked in, sliding the door shut behind him.

"Darling." Magnus smiled slightly and James returned the gesture. Magnus' eyes roamed James' bare torso, scars remained of the burns from Alec's derunement, another reminder of who is and isn't laid out in front of him. It is his husband, but it also is not. His body was the body of Alexander Lightwood-Bane, but the mind was James Marcs.

Magnus rounded the bed hesitantly and laid down, stretched out next to James and prepared to fall asleep as soon as he could let his eyes fall shut.

James rolled on top of Magnus with some difficulty as soon as he was laid back against the pillows. Magnus let out a slight gasp in surprise, having not expected the move and certainly not feeling up to doing what James was insinuating. Magnus just laid there stiffly as James started to kiss and suck at Magnus' throat. Magnus recognized the feeling of those lips against his neck, Alec's lips, and as wonderful as it felt, it still felt wrong.

There was a rising feeling of guilt settling in his chest as James started to grind against Magnus, his hips dragging back and forth against Magnus', lips mouthing over his neck and down towards the neckline of Magnus' silk shirt, he was surely leaving bruises down the skin of Magnus' neck. His breath started coming quicker and shallower as his eyes fell shut both in pleasure and shame, James' fingers were undoing Magnus' buttons, not James' fingers, Alec's. Alec his husband, Alec the father of his children, Alec who was not here. It was that thought that did it for Magnus, gave him the courage to say that enough was enough.

"Stop." Magnus said strongly, opening his eyes and looking up at James as he stopped immediately, pulling away from Magnus' neck and looking down into Magnus' unglamoured eyes. James was not moving from his spot straddling Magnus' hips mid-grind, his hips pressing forward right into Magnus at just the right angle, making this all the more difficult for Magnus.

Alec - no, James looked at Magnus confused. Magnus just looked up into those beautiful hazel eyes. Those were Alexander's eyes, but the person and the mind them; it was James. Magnus broke their eye contact and looked down at James' leg, still straddling Magnus, bent by his hip.

Magnus didn't want James. He loved him, sure. Their love had been amazing, but Alexander was the best version of Magnus' soulmate, yet. And Magnus was in love with Alec, not James. He wanted his husband back. He wanted the man that made him pancakes and brought them to bed every Wednesday morning, waking him up with a sweet kiss and a smile. He wanted the man that sang their baby to sleep with their song, he wanted the man that had begged him for immortality and had wept when Magnus finally gave in. He wanted the man that so effortlessly loved Magnus and their children. The man that had danced with Magnus in the kitchen at one in the morning just last week, laughing and singing in his ear and he twirled him around and dipped him low, giving him a kiss that nearly brought tears to Magnus' eyes.

"I feel like I'm cheating on my husband." Magnus admitted breathlessly, willing his arousal to go away, proof of his momentary betrayal. While Magnus was sure that Alec wouldn't see it that way, Magnus was ashamed of himself. He closed his eyes and brought his hands up to his face for a moment. He felt James slide off of him and onto the mattress beside him and was grateful that the man didn't say anything. Magnus knew that if he heard his Alexander's voice, British accent or no, he would do anything it asked of him. He pulled in a shaky breath.

He could almost hear Alec's voice in his ear, whispering that it was alright. That James and Alec shared the same soul, that this wasn't adultery. It was still Alec, memories or no. It was his body and his soul, but it wasn't his mind and that was enough for Magnus to consider his actions a slight against his husband, and he silently promised whoever was listening that if he ever got his Alexander back that he would give him the apology he deserved, whether he would take it or not.

"I'm going to go sleep in a guest room for the night." Magnus sat up and quickly got off the bed, putting distance between James and himself. "Please, don't hesitate to wake me if you need anything." He started to turn his back on the man in his bed and walk from the room, but he was stopped by a familiar British Accent ringing across the room, drawing him back towards him.

"Magnus." James immediately protested. "No, I'll go." He started to rise from the bed, planting his feet against the floor and pushing himself up. Magnus moved towards him and placed a hand on his bare shoulder. He pushed him back down against the bed and he shook his head and reached down to trail his fingertips along James' cheekbone.

"You may not be the man that I am married to, the man that I am in love with, but James, you are still my soulmate and I have a great love for you. You will sleep here, and I will sleep in Raphael's old room." James opened his mouth to protest once more but Magnus held a hand up and shook his head again. "This is not an inconvenience for me. Alexander died, he was dead for several minutes after being strangled to death and then he managed to still kill his murderer in his final moments. He used up all of his energy and magic. Meaning that you are drained, you need to sleep. I want you to be comfortable and you will be comfortable here. I just do not feel good about staying here and sleeping with you in this bed."

James nodded slowly albeit sadly. "I understand, goodnight Magnus."

Magnus smiled sadly. "Goodnight James."

He pretended not to hear the whispered declaration of love that followed him out of the room.

-DAY ONE-

When Magnus woke up, the first thing that he noticed is that his husband was not lying beside him. The next thing that he noticed is that he was not in his room. He laid there confused for a moment before the memories of the night before came rushing back and Magnus allowed himself a few moments to let some tears fall from his eyes at the reminder that his husband had disappeared and an earlier version of him had taken his place.

He tried not to feel so defeated, trying to muster up some courage and determination. He had to make himself believe that his husband would come back to him, but the thought of his body and soul lying in bed a few rooms just down the hall tore at Magnus' heart and made it hard for him to believe that this problem would ever be resolved.

He eventually forced himself to heave himself out of the bed he had slept in and go and check on James in the master bedroom a few doors down. James was awake and staring at the wall blankly when Magnus poked his head in.

"How are you feeling?" Magnus asked him, gently, trying not to startle the man that clearly hadn't heard the door opening.

James looked up, surprised by the sound of Magnus' voice. He gazed at Magnus for a moment, he looked fairly conflicted and Magnus felt bad for him. This was a lot to take in and it had been sprung on him quickly in a high-stress situation. James shrugged. "Alright, I suppose." He replied. "Are you okay?"

Magnus nodded although he knew it was a lie, there was no way that Magnus could possibly be okay right now.

"Are you hungry?" Magnus asked.

James' brow furrowed. "No, not really."

Magnus nodded. "Okay." He hovered in the doorway and just watched James for a moment as he turned his head back towards the wall and the blank expression returned. He took in his body language and noticed how tense the man was, he probably felt uncomfortable under Magnus' watchful gaze. Magnus nodded once more and he walked out of the room, feeling rather awkward.

- 2 hours later -

Magnus went back to the master bedroom a little later and found James in pretty much the same position as he had been that morning, he was sitting up a little straighter, his hair slightly more mussed as if he had been running his hands through it and he was staring at a different wall with the same blank expression as before.

"Are you alright?" Magnus asked, leaning against the door jamb, arms crossed against his chest and one ankle crossed over the other. "Do you need anything?"

James looked over at Magnus and smiled, his expression changing from blank to one of timid happiness. The smile, however, dimmed slightly almost as soon as it appeared.

Magnus could see the moment where everything changed. James' face fell, his expression turned confused, troubled. He looked away from Magnus, eyes favoring the floor instead, moving back and forth from one floorboard to the other as if he were reading something quickly.

"James?" Magnus moved towards the bed one hand outstretched as if to touch him. "What's wrong?"

Hazel eyes snapped up to lock on Magnus' brown ones and James just stared up at him, his features darkening. "Darling?" Magnus prompted moving towards James again.

James immediately jumped up and put his hands out in front of him. "Get away from me!"

Magnus blinked, shocked. What had he done to get such a reaction out of the man?

"Darling, what is going on?" Magnus asked. "It's just me, it's Magnus."

"I know it is!" James cried. "And I already told you, I can't be with you anymore! I can't be immortal. What, did you send the man who mugged me to kidnap me? You can't force me to be with you, Magnus!"

"Etta?" Magnus breathed, taking a step back in shock. His heart dropped and his eyes watered a little.

Etta scoffed and rose off of the bed, going to brush past Magnus when he grabbed her arm.

"No, wait!" He cried. "You haven't been kidnapped; those muggers killed you seventy one years ago. Twenty years after you died, I met your reincarnation James. He died thirty-nine years ago and I'm currently married to another incarnation, Alexander. Last night Alexander nearly died and has amnesia. Apparently, it's worse than we thought, A few minutes ago he still had James' memories and I was speaking with James."

Etta stared at him for a long moment. "I can't stay here, Magnus." She insisted.

"You can't leave!" Magnus begged. "You are in my husband's body. He's hurt. His heart stopped, he stopped breathing. Should your memories fade as well, George will not know what is happening, he will be lost in modern day New York, clueless and injured. You may have left me, but my husband has not! Don't take him from me, please!"

Etta hesitated. "Magnus . . ."

"Please, just stay here, I'll go into another room, you don't have to see me. Just please, don't endanger my husband. We have children, an infant. He needs his father."

The mention of children had Etta deflating. "I suppose that would be fine." She sat back on the bed, her expression of resignation marred Alexander's beautiful features. It broke Magnus' heart to see that look on his husband's face. He forgot for only a second that it was not Alexander that looked so put out at the idea of having to stay in the same apartment as him, and it made his shoulders hunch forward and his chin tip down.

"Was I truly that horrible to you?" He asked quietly, voice wavering slightly.

Etta sighed. "No, I loved you, Magnus. So much."

"Tell me the truth," Magnus requested. "Did you turn down immortality because you didn't want it, didn't want me, or because Azrael told you to?"

Panic flitted across Etta's face before she masked it. "Azrael?" She asked with faux confusion. "Who's that?"

"We both know that it is the Angel that granted you the gift of reincarnation as Anne. He has given you tasks every life except for Imasu. Answer the question, Etta."

Etta stood up and framed Magnus' face with her hands. "I love you more than life itself, Magnus Bane." She leaned in and kissed him. Magnus pulled away after a second.

"I'm married," He whispered. "I'm in love with Alexander."

Etta nodded understandingly. "I never wanted to hurt you, my love." She whispered. "It killed me, literally."

Magnus smiled slightly. "Why don't you rest?" He suggested. "I'm going to go brew some more potions."

He left the room without waiting for her response, somehow more heartbroken over Etta's actions than he was going into the conversation.

- DAY TWO -

The next time that more of Alexander's memories disappeared, Magnus wasn't in the room. He was in the kitchen trying to make something for the both of them to eat. It was just past ten in the morning and he, Catarina and Wesley had been working all night to try and find a solution to Alec's lapse in memory. They made next to no progress and Magnus was frustrated if he was being honest.

He turned around and noticed Alec, or Etta, standing in the doorway watching him with a sort of fascination that Magnus found to be odd.

"Everything alright?" He asked as he plated the pancakes that he'd made.

"Magnus?" He breathed.

Magnus looked up at his husband, really looked at him. This wasn't Etta anymore.

"George." It wasn't a question. "Are you hungry?" He asked, looking away and moving to set the table.

"How am I here?" George asked. "Where is here? I was fighting in the battle. Was I injured?"

"You died in battle, darling." Magnus explained wearily, sitting down at the table in front of one of the plates. "That was one hundred and one years ago. The body you are currently occupying is the body of my husband, another reincarnation. Alexander. He was injured and has amnesia that is getting worse and worse as time goes on."

George looked fascinated by Magnus' explanation and Magnus sighed, he couldn't go on like this for much longer.

Breakfast was a quiet affair, Magnus shoveling food in his mouth and George taking bites every once in a while, but choosing to instead spend his time staring at Magnus with wide eyes.

"I'm sorry." George told him towards the end of the meal.

"For?" Magnus asked, confused.

"I never should have gone to war." George said sincerely. "You are far more important than any war. I should have run with you."

Magnus shook his head. "I know that this has just taken place for you, but it has been over a century for me. Those wounds have long healed, Alexander healed them all."

George frowned but nodded and Magnus went back to eating in silence, George hesitantly following his lead.

- SEVEN HOURS LATER -

When it was Imasu's turn to make an appearance, Magnus stayed long enough to explain everything to his soulmate before locking himself away in his apothecary. He had cast a spell on the master bedroom so he would be alerted if Imasu tried to leave, but mostly, he just couldn't bring himself to spend any time around the man that had broken his heart so thoroughly.

He remembered what happened after their breakup, well, he didn't actually remember it. He remembered what Catarina, Wesley and Ragnor had told him he had done. Breaking into a perfect stranger's house, stealing the carpet and enchanting it to fly, flying off as his friends followed him, shouting things that they still to this day, refuse to repeat. Apparently, he had also landed in the desert, asking them to leave him there so he could start his new life as a cactus, conjured needles and threw them at his friends with deadly accuracy. He then flew off again, stopped for a meal with his friends, attempted to flirt with his plate and then fell asleep on the ground. It was the worst break up of his life, not even Etta had been so cruel.

Magnus spent his time trying to find a cure for his husband. He thought it was a much better and productive way to spend his time rather than worrying about the man that had hurt him over a century ago.

To Magnus' despair, by the end of the night he was no closer to finding any relevant information on his husband's condition than he was the night before.

- DAY THREE -

Isaac had taken the news better than the rest. He had sat with Magnus quietly all day, either watching Magnus as he read or grabbing a book and reading it himself. He didn't ask questions, didn't ramble with needless apologies for wounds that were over a century old and had long since healed.

Magnus appreciated the quiet, but it also unnerved him. What was Isaac thinking? Why was he staring so intently? He refused to look up. He didn't want to see Alexander's beautiful eyes looking at him and then have to deal with the fact that it wasn't actually Alexander.

"Du er trist. (You're sad.)" Isaac spoke up, the fragile silence shattering with his words.

"Tull. (Nonsense)" Magnus denied, not looking up from his book.

"Jeg kjenner deg bedre enn du kjenner deg selv, min kjærlighet. (I know you better than you know yourself, my love.)" Isaac sighed.

"Jeg savner bare mannen min. (I just miss my husband.)" Magnus admitted, turning the page of the book he was no longer reading.

"Jeg beklager at han er borte. Jeg ønsker ikke å se deg ulykkelig. (I'm sorry that he is gone. I do not wish to see you unhappy.)" Isaac apologized sincerely.

"Alexander er ikke borte! (Alexander is not gone!)" Magnus snapped, closing the book with a thud. He glared at Isaac for one intense moment before he sighed and let the tension drained from him. "Han er ikke borte. Jeg vil finne en måte å bringe ham tilbake på. (He is not gone. I will find a way to bring him back.)"

Even as the words passed Magnus' lips, he wasn't sure that he believed them. There were only three lives of memories left and Alec was blowing through them quickly. Magnus feared that he wouldn't find a cure until it was too late, and Alec lost all his memory. How long would it take until those Hazel eyes were looking at him with all confusion and no recognition? How long until his husband didn't know who he was to him anymore?

- DAY FOUR -

Isaac stayed for the entire day yesterday. After their conversation, Isaac didn't say much, and Magnus was relieved for it.

Cat and Wesley had come over again, as they now did every night while his soulmate slept and tried to find a cure. They had an idea, it wasn't certain, and Magnus was wary of trying it out on his husband lest it backfire but they had no choice, it was their only idea thus far.

So, when Isaac woke up as Adam, Magnus gently explained everything to the man. Magnus was warmed by how Adam immediately attached himself to Magnus and fretted about how horrible he felt about leaving him.

Adam had been such a gentle soul and Magnus saw a lot of him in Alexander when he was tired or sick. He often had a similar temperament in those moments that made Magnus' heart melt.

For just a second, Magnus allowed himself to be deluded into believing that Alexander was just sick and that it was him that he was holding in his arms. His husband's face pressed against his neck; strong arms wrapped around his middle.

"Chéri, bois ça." Magnus murmured handing the vial over to Adam as he pulled back. Adam accepted the vial without question and drank it all. Magnus watched, hopeful, as Adam placed the vial down on the bedside table and curled back into Magnus' arms, head against his shoulder staring lovingly up into Magnus' eyes.

And then the love disappeared, making way for confusion. He watched as someone else took Adam's place and to his despair, it was not Alexander.

"Magnus?" Thomas blinked slowly, disoriented. "¿Que pasó? (What happened?)"

"Thomas, mi dulce amor querido. Fuiste asesinado hace más de trescientos años. Una reencarnación tuya, mi esposo, resultó herida y tiene amnesia. Por eso has vuelto. Es temporal, querida (Thomas, my sweet darling love. You were murdered over three hundred years ago. A reincarnation of yourself, my husband, was injured and has amnesia. That is why you have come back. It is temporary, my dear.)"

Thomas' eyes widened and he snuggled further into Magnus' chest, taking in the information. Magnus breathed in Alexander's scent and just sat there with him. He didn't dare move, he just held on to Thomas and feared for the worst. After this, Alec only had one more life of memories. Then he would forget Magnus forever, unless Magnus could find a cure. But Magnus had no ideas left.

Magnus feels like they were doomed from the very beginning, like they never stood a chance against the world's cruel ways.

All he could do now was hold his lover and soak in this beautiful love before it was lost to him forever.