Chapter 21

Hades

I sat heavily on the edge of my bed and fell backwards into it. It felt amazingly soft and comfortable under my abused back. I let myself just breathe for a few moments, enjoying what I had grown to take for granted. My stomach gave a painful twist, and I abruptly remembered my hunger. I ordered food and wine to be brought immediately and ate it ravenously when it came.

From what I could make out, I had been gone for almost an entire day. One day full of tortures that would have killed any mortal.

I could only allow myself another day to recover before getting back to my usual work, I decided. I slept through it, mostly. At first there was nothing but nightmares. Luckily I always kept a vase of Narcissus, the same kind of flower I used to ensnare Persephone, by my bedside. Though I was immune to its irresistible charm, it still had the power to put me to sleep. After waking from the first nightmare of fire and darkness, I snatched a flower out of the vase and brought it to my nose, letting it put me into a dreamless sleep.

I got up several hours later, changed into a fresh pair of clothes, and left. I did need to get back to work, but there was someone I wanted to see first. It would mean another trip to the world above since I doubted I could get Aphrodite to come down to the Underworld to see me. I saddled up my horse and rode him out rather than taking my chariot. I wanted to speak to Charon before I went, so I might as well take that route.

As I went, I tried not to think about the things the Furies had said. I couldn't deny, however, that the same things had been in the back of my mind for a long time now.

Had my mother really...

I would probably never know, so it was better to not even ask. In reality, my mother was away in exile somewhere. When Zeus had taken the throne, he had imprisoned all of the Titans in Tartarus. It was fitting for the Titans who had kept my siblings and I captive in the very same pit. The only Titans spared were Prometheus, because he had sided with us during the war, and Rhea, whom Zeus banished to some island. I hadn't seen her since.

Thoughts of my torture led me, naturally, to what happened afterwards. I had always known that Persephone was capable of great kindness, but I had never been the recipient of it before. She hadn't so much as touched me during her time in the Underworld. Yet, somehow when she saw my distress, she actually found it in her heart to put her arms around me. Perhaps, perhaps, if she could overcome her dislike of me enough to comfort me, maybe this could actually work out somehow.

If she didn't die first.

The thought weighed heavy on my heart, but I couldn't allow such a dire future crush me into inaction. A way for her survival may yet be found. After all, she still walked and breathed.

I came out of my thoughts while riding alongside the River Styx. In fact, I realized that I was almost to where Cerberus was. I cracked my whip so that Cerberus would know that I was there. I hated when he jumped out at me, and so I trained him to stay away at the sound of the whip.

As I came up to him, he was indeed cowering away from me. He let out a whimper. Annoyed, I offhandedly lashed my whip at his paw. It left behind a trail of open flesh.

"All you have in your heart is selfish cruelty."

"You have no mercy or kindness in your heart."

Unbidden, memories of Alecto and Persephone's words came to my mind. Cruel. Selfish. Yes, that's what I was. A monster with a heart of stone. I wasn't worth loving, not the way I was. Was it even possible to change, though?

I knew the answer immediately. For Persephone, I could do anything. I already went through hell for her. After that, what was left?

I steered my horse closer to the hound and gave Cerberus a tentative pat on the head before continuing on to the river bank. Behind me, Cerberus's whimper died down.

I waited for Charon to bring his boat, full of spirits, to my side of the water. I counted the souls as they disembarked, my brow furrowed over the unusually high number.

"Charon!" I called out to the boatman. He flinched at the sound and got out of his vessel, bowing to me over and over again as he came over.

"Charon, that's a lot of souls," I remarked. My concern momentarily distracted me from what I had come here to say.

"Yes, my Lord, and more waiting on the other side," he answered in his usual muttering voice. "So many. So long."

"So long? So it's been like this for a while now?"

"Yes, yes. My poor back. Never gets rested. Never stops, they keep coming. More and more..."

He kept rambling like this to himself, but I had heard enough. I examined the spirits and noticed one middle-aged man.

"You there!" I called, pointing. Several spirits turned, including the man. He seemed startled to see my finger pointed right at him.

"Me, sir?" He asked, bewildered.

"Yes you. Do you know why there are so many people dying?"

"It's gotten so cold, sir. The food's stopped agrowin'. We's barely had anything to live offa. It's the gods that's done it, beggin' your pardon, sir."

"What gods?"

"The plantin' one. Demeter, sir. The priests' sayin' it's coz her daughter's gone. They says it were the cur in charge of the Underworld, sir, that tooks her."

"Thank you."

The man nodded and went on his way.

"Wait!" I called after him.

He jogged back and said, "Sir?"

"When you get to the judges, tell them that you are to go to Elysium. If they try to stop you, tell them Hades commands it."

"You're Had-? But sir, er, your Lordship, I-called you a cur, beggin' your pardon, right to your face, beggin' your pardon, sir."

"I deserve it, believe me. And anyway, you amuse me. There's not... many who can do that." I looked down at his disbelieving face and felt another wave of amusement. That prompted me to say, in a brusque voice, "Don't ask so many questions."

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir!" He exclaimed, looking baffled. He walked away, glancing at me once in a while over his shoulder to see if I would change my mind.

I chuckled at him after he was out of view. Dear Gelos, that felt good. I forgot how much weight laughing can take off.

"...dark place. No light ever. Except the girl. She had light, like the Spring..."

I had forgotten about Charon. He stood by his boat, chewing on his mustache and wringing his hands nervously. I walked my horse up to him. He quickly stopped muttering to himself.

"You disobeyed the law, Charon, and you disobeyed an express command. I told you when she first came here that you were not to let her out, and yet you did. Why?" I demanded.

"Sh-she was kind, my Lord. She didn't yell at me. She was like the Sun." He tugged on his knotted beard with his knotted hand, cringing beneath my glare.

"This isn't the first time you've done this, Charon, and if you do it again, there will be severe consequences."

Charon flinched, anticipating my fist.

With an effort, I pushed my anger down. "Luckily for you, I paid the price this time around, but next time it will be you who suffers. Do you understand?"

Charon looked confused at my sudden mercy. There was no reason to look surprised. I could be merciful. I had been merciful before, surely. Though...I couldn't think of an example at the moment.

Charon reluctantly nodded his wispy head.

"Back to your duties, then," I said roughly, "and do as I say this time. But first, I wish to go across the river."

Charon nodded and moved aside so that my horse could step into the boat. As we went, I thought about what that mortal had told me. No doubt Demeter was angry about me stealing Persephone. If I went into the open, I would be spotted within minutes. My presence would be known by nearly everyone, and Demeter would come for my head. It would be wisest to use my Helm of Darkness to mask my movements. The idea didn't bother me in the least.

The boat hit the bank, and I noticed that Charon was right: there were a lot of souls, much more than usual. It mattered little to me whether or not the other gods decided to kill all the mortals, since living ones did me little good as it was. So, I just put on my Helm and went up the tunnel, smug that I had given the job of judging to others.

The Earth looked more dead than the last time I had been up here. The leaves were gone entirely from the trees and a bone chilling wind shook the bare branches. Though I wished for a cloak, the cold didn't bother me enough to deter me. I spurred the horse into a gallop. He all but flew towards Olympus, where Aphrodite lived. The temple that she chose to spend her time in was nearer the base of the mountain, which was as green and fertile as it ever was, despite the cold in the valley below.

I strode straight through the front doors without removing my Helm. I preferred to see if Aphrodite was even here before revealing myself. She was and, as usual, was surrounded by an entourage. Not wanting anyone else to know I was here, I stalked up to Aphrodite until I was right behind her.

"Tell everyone to leave," I whispered in her ear. She gave no sign she had heard me, but a few moments later, she said,

"I've grown tired. I am going to retire to my chambers and I wish to be left alone."

With that, she left the room, and I couldn't help but admire the way she did. When Aphrodite made an exit, she made an exit, swaying as she walked in such a way that left jaws on the floor.

I presumed that I was meant to follow her, and so I did. We came to her chamber. She went inside, with me coming in soon after her, and locked the door behind her. As soon as the lock clicked, I removed my Helm to become visible.

"There. What did you want to talk to me about?" She turned to me with a suggestive smile, but blanched when she saw me. "Mother Gaia, Hades! What happened to you?"

There were enough mirrors in her room that I didn't have to ask what she meant. My skin still wasn't fully healed, my hair was ragged, and my clothes, though clean, were ones I usually wore while working and therefore were terribly ratty. Since I always came to Olympus well groomed, I wasn't surprised by her reaction. The Goddess of Beauty appreciated things of beauty, and - though I wasn't necessarily considered the most handsome of the gods-I was generally presentable enough not to offend her sensibilities.

"Oh, I'm in a bit of a mess because of a girl," I said airly. Aphrodite smiled knowingly.

"Ah, yes. I had heard that you had decided to settle down," she gloated, and her sky blue eyes burned with triumphant. "I thought that Kore might be the right one for you, and I was right. I'm so glad I took time to arrange things. I can see souls that were meant to be together like that!" She snapped her fingers together.

Something about her phrasing stopped me from saying what I had planned. "Wait," I said instead, "you did this?"

She laughed a tinkling laugh. "Of course, love! I didn't see either of you falling for anyone else anytime soon, so I took matters into my own capable hands."

I was completely stunned. Of all the things I thought I would hear Aphrodite say, this hadn't been one of them.

"So-so it was all a lie?" I felt lightheaded, and nausea washed over me.

"No, no, of course not! I am the goddess of all love, including true love. When I have Eros shoot someone with an arrow of love, it is as real as if that person had decided to do so themselves. Love, the beginning of it anyway, is entirely a matter of chance. I got you started; anything that happened after that was you."

Aphrodite was close to me again, as she usually was, but she was more sincere than I had ever seen her, which left me wondering how big of a lie she was telling right now. She sighed.

"Hades, you love her, don't you?"

"Yes." The answer came without hesitation.

"Then what does it matter where that love came from?"

She had a point, I had to admit. I pushed down my objections for now and asked another question that her admission had made me think of.

"Did you have Eros shoot her as well, or was it just my heart you decided to toy with?"

Aphrodite looked suddenly guilty. I never would have thought I'd see that expression on her face.

"Hades, you know how Demeter is," she said pleadingly. "If she had found out that I had made her daughter fall in love with you, she'd be after me as well as you. I'm already terrified that she'll find out what I did to you as it is!"

The cavalier way she played with the emotions of others sickened me. And yet, without her, I might not have Persephone in my life at all. I wanted to leave, but I asked her the question I had come to ask instead.

"How do I get her to love me?"

"Tell me first what you have tried."

I told her about everything: the visits, the abduction, and finally her disastrous escape attempt. She listened with rapt interest, clicking her tongue at my awkward outreaches and gasping in all the right places of the story of Persephone's escape and rescue. In the end, she gave me another one of her dazzling smiles.

"Oh, Hades. Isn't it obvious? You've almost suffocated her with attention! Give her room to breathe, to think, to realize that she misses you. Why don't you leave her alone for a month or two?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "I suppose I could…."

She gave me an understanding look. "It's hard for the heart to be away from what it longs for most, is it not?"

I looked away and nodded.

"I cannot send my son into the Underworld to pierce her heart in a similar way, but I can give you some of the elixir he uses for his love arrows, if you wish."

It was a tempting idea. It would put an end to this whole affair, which was more tortuous and was taking more time than I had anticipated at the beginning.

But, I reminded myself, you promised you wouldn't force her to eat the food of the Underworld to make her love you. Is this really much different?

"Thank you, but I would prefer...other methods."

"If that is what you wish," Aphrodite nodded. She turned away from me and lounged on one of the nearby couches in a way that would have driven any unattached (and many attached) men mad.

"May I tell you a secret?" She asked in a low voice.

"Please."

"Kore...no. That's not the place to start," she said almost to herself. Then, louder, "Do you believe in soulmates? That each person has only one other person that is made for them?"

"I haven't really ever considered it," I shrugged. I thought a moment more. "No, in my experience, they don't exist."

"Well, in my experience they do," she mocked me. Then, in a more serious voice, "While my love arrows can create love out of nothing and even out of hatred, they are strongest when they find those that are 'soulmates.' And I can tell. I know when two people are meant to be together. I saw you and Kore-excuse me, you called her Persephone? Well, I saw you two together at the feast and the potential for love that was in your eyes was also in hers. From what you have told me, it doesn't sound like her potential is completely gone." She beckoned to me and took my hand as I came closer. "There's still hope, Hades. Don't give up too soon."

Her words rang through my head as I left her temple. How much I believed her, I wasn't sure. I wanted to believe her that there was still hope. Acting on that desire, I decided I would follow her advice. Persephone wouldn't be seeing much of me. For now.