Chapter 4

Zane detaches his prosthetics and his legs ache in protest from not having a break between missions. He focuses on cleaning them; wiping away grease and oiling parts. This routine is safe. It's familiar. He settles into bed, pulling the blanket over him. He reaches up and presses the button to activate his digi-clone.

"Hey gorgeous," he huffs at the image. Just like before, the clone walks over and sits on the bed. It raises an eyebrow at Zane.

"You saw what happened today, during the fight, yeah?" The image nods. Zane laments that he feels partially to blame for the hunter's injury. He tells his companion about their interactions the last few nights, including Fl4k's warm touch.

"This old heart doesn't know what to do." He rubs his eyes. "Or what to think."

The clone gives him a knowing look. Zane frowns.

"No, I'm not going there with you tonight." Suddenly annoyed, he presses the button again and his digi-clone disappears. There are some things that Zane has tried to bury and forget for years. Now that strategy seems to be biting him in the ass.

He huffs and settles down into his bed. The dreams he's been having as of late have been bad enough, he doesn't need more stress.

When sleep finally comes, it's not kind.

Zane's heart races, a thin layer of sweat forms on his skin. His throat aches from screaming. Fragile hands ripped from his. The smell of burning flesh fills his nose and throat, choking him. There's horrible laughter and familiar hands holding him to the ground. Cold tears streak down his face. His nails dig into the dark dirt. He remembers every desperate prayer that fell out of his mouth that day. A voice calls to him from far away, making him twitch. A firm hand on his shoulder wakes him with a gasp.

On instinct, Zane reaches under his pillow, grabbing the pocket knife he keeps there. Swinging wildly, a firm hand grasps his wrist, stopping him. He pants, looking up to see Fl4k sitting on the edge of his bed. He loosens his grip on the knife and they release his wrist.

"T-the hell are you doing here?" his voice comes out strained and weak. He cringes.

"You were screaming," they respond.

Fl4k says something about his pets hearing him but he's not listening. Zane is staring wide-eyed at himself. No. This isn't happening. His heart is in his throat and a wave of nausea sweeps over him. He can deal with Fl4k knowing he has prosthetics. But for them to see him like this, broken and scared out of his wits it too much. The blanket does nothing to hide the emptiness. Fl4k is still talking to him but he just shakes his head, gasping for breath.

"Get out. Go. Just… Go… Get out…" his voice is barely a whisper. His eyes burn with unshed tears.

Fl4k moves quickly, their hands cupping Zane's face. He closes his eyes, unable to meet the hunter's gaze. He's ashamed. Ashamed of being so helpless and weak. It's too vulnerable, too raw. It pains him. He twists the sheet in his fists, completely paralyzed. Totally stuck, unable to move or even speak.

There's rustling and then Fl4k's coat is around his shoulders. He tries to let out a chuckle when they pull the hood up, covering his face. But it comes out a strangled sob, tears falling freely. He slips his arms into the sleeves and curls in on himself.

He doesn't know how long he lays like that, slowly breathing. The nightmare slowly fades away, leaving his throat dry and sore. He knows the hunter is still there which he finds oddly comforting.

"Warn a guy next time, would ya?" he chuckles softly.

"I didn't mean-"

"I know… Fuck. I know." He opens his eyes to see his lap. The hunter is still sitting on the edge of the bed. "I know, beastie. You just caught me off guard. That's all."

Finally, he straightens himself and, taking a deep breath, meets Fl4k's gaze. They look concerned, their gaze soft. They hold themself still, as if they may startle a wild animal.

Zane softly jokes, "I won't bite, beastie."

They watch him for another moment before asking what he was dreaming about.

Quickly he says he was being attacked by a nasty ratch nest.

"Lying doesn't suit you… snowdrop."

The nickname perks Zane up, his heart fluttering. He pauses for a second, thinking about what was going on. He woke up screaming in the middle of the night and Fl4k came to check on him. The pressure in his chest lessens at the thought. It didn't change the fact that Zane hated being seen like this but the hunter didn't leave. They could have. What's keeping them here? He's said he's fine but Fl4k has made no effort to take their coat back. He meets their eye again, searching for any sign of pity, relieved to see none. He shakes his head and swallows.

"Now what?" he murmurs under his breath.

Fl4k hums for a moment and then moves closer. They raise a hand and wrap it gently around the back of his neck. Zane's heart skips a beat, breath catching in his throat. He furrows his brow, questioning himself.

They lean down and touch their forehead to his, surprising him. Zane doesn't move and Fl4k closes their eye, nudging closer. He exhales, wrapping his hand around their wrist and closes his eyes too. He focuses on the warm radiating from them. He breathes deeply and shudders when Fl4k softly caresses his face. He watches the hunter through half-lidded eyes. They're so close. His gaze goes to where their mouth would be. He gently bumps his forehead against them.

"What's gotten into you lately, mm?" he whispers. Fl4k opens their eye. The light shimmers.

"I just…" they stop. It's unusual for them to stop. They're always so sure of their words. "I just want to bring you comfort."

In any other moment, Zane would chuckle and make a silly joke. But right now, wearing the hunter's coat while they exchange a look in his bed, is a totally different thing. It's heavy. There's a sincerity that he wasn't expecting to feel. There's nothing funny to be made here.

Fl4k looks at Zane's body and, despite him tensing up, their gaze doesn't fail. There's no way to hide the truth in this moment, no matter how badly he wishes it. They move their hand to his left cheek, softly caressing it, looking into his blind eye. It's discolored, the iris a pale egg-shell, a thin scar running across it. His right eye is a bright blue.

"It doesn't bother me." Zane's ears burn but he stands by his words. It bothers him greatly. Fl4k's hand falls away from his face and he mourns the loss already. He leans back against the wall. They should go, but it hurts to say out loud.

"Who are Aliera and Jericho?" Fl4k asks quietly, watching Zane carefully.

It feels like a gut punch, the air forcing itself from his lungs.

"You were… calling for them," they say softly.

Zane shakes his head. "Not tonight, beastie."

They caress his cheek again and Zane leans into the touch.

"You should rest," they say. Zane frowns, but they're right. He starts to take the hunter's coat off but they stop him.

"Return it tomorrow. It seems to help you calm down," they stand. Their eyes meet for a moment and then Fl4k turns and goes.

The door hisses closed behind them and Zane is alone again. His heart is still pounding but he does feel a little better. He still can't figure out how he feels about everything. Sighing, he pulls the coat closer to him, inhaling the scent. It's big enough that it covers his entire body since he's not wearing prosthetics. He settles back into bed, waiting for sleep to come back, not wanting to think about any of it.