I do not own anything besides these words and the cover art.

"It is not polite to keep a lady waiting", Mihawk's voice drifted from the staircase where he had his elbows on top of his knees and his hands interlaced by his mustache.

Zoro snickered, hands in his pockets, "Sorry to keep you waiting, ma'am."

Nami was about to respond when Zoro clutched her from behind and swung her around. Where they once stood, a giant crack formed from the swift drop of a leg. Nami panted as Zoro's hold on her grew stronger and they glanced as the dust finally settled and a tall, slim figure fixed her deep purple gown. It hugged in all the right places, except for the slit that went up almost to her hip. Unblemished soft skin broke out through the dark fabric. Boa flipped her hair off her shoulder and put a hand on her hip.

She smiled and Zoro felt a chill go down his spine. "Almost got you, Loverboy."

Zoro released Nami as Mihawk rose from his seat and walked down the steps with a swagger. "It wasn't me you left waiting, fighter. Don't think that with one win under your belt, you can waste our time." He glanced over at Boa who seemed hungry for a workout, "Cara mia, will you be alright?"

She licked her lips and pursed them seductively, "Of course, mon batte." She cracked her neck around. "I'll have the time of my life."

Mihawk smiled, "Do not wear him out too much, mia dea. He still has to fight next week."

Boa laughed wickedly, "Never. He's not even my size."

Zoro flinched at the way they spoke of him as if he was a suit she would try on. In the meantime, Nami managed to wiggle herself away from Zoro and stood by Mihawk. He gripped her elbow and pulled her towards him, "Come on, I have something you might like."

Mihawk stopped his touch and rubbed his fingers together. "Why are you sticky?"

Boa giggled, "Oh my, is that why you're late?"

Nami groaned and Mihawk sniffed her hair. He spoke flatly to his wife, "No, it seems they rolled around in dough?"

Zoro opened his mouth to respond, but Nami pushed Mihawk away and shouted, "Nevermind that. You said you have something for me."

Zoro side-eyed them, but Boa cleared her throat, which brought his attention back to her. "I do not like to be ignored. I'm your fight today, boy, and I don't share my attention."

Zoro groaned. "What's with you two? Between Count Chocula over there and what are you…his crazy assassin?"

Boa glared at him. "I belong to no man." She ran at him full speed and before Zoro could gauge the distance, her knee went into his gut and he flew back. Boa flipped her hair back again, "But, assassin is right. And if he gets to be a Count, then I'm a goddamn goddess, and I will make you bow down before me."

Zoro coughed up red spit, and his internal organs felt like they went through a blender. He slowly picked himself up and tightened the bandaged on his knuckles. "We'll see about that, bitch."

Nami watched with a twang of fear in her heart, but Mihawk pulled her away as the building shook around them. "Are you afraid for your champion?" Mihawk asked with amusement.

Nami scoffed, "He is not likely to be distracted by Boa like other men. He'll be fine."

Another crash resounded behind her, and Boa's grunts reached Nami's ears. She felt a smile grace her lips and Mihawk paid it no mind as they approached a desk set up in the back of another broken down room.

"So, what do you have for me, Mihawk? And I don't want any of the toys you and your freak wife use. I get enough of that shit from Perona."

Mihawk smiled, "She gave you what you needed then?"

Nami rolled her eyes. "And then some."

Mihawk pulled back the sheet on top of the table to reveal an array of automatic weaponry; some of them even looked experimental to Nami. Regardless, her eyes glimmered over the trinkets of war that Mihawk and Boa managed to amass.

"Ooh, a gift for me, Mihawk?" Nami pulled at his giant gold cross around his neck. "You shouldn't have."

Mihawk picked up a silver handgun and placed it between them. "Why don't you show me what you know?"

Nami sneered, "You doubt me after all these years?"

Mihawk shrugged, "I want to make sure you are capable of what you say you can do. That boy has his fists and you have your body, but if a trigger needs to be pulled…I need to make sure you can hit the target."

Nami pulled the slide back and pointed it at the wall in under a second. The shot resounded as she continued to look at Mihawk. He glanced down her arm to see the bullet lodged into the mouth of a crumbling marble bust by the far wall.

He looked back at her clear eyes and mused, "Were you aiming for a headshot?"'

Nami smiled, "No. Just wanted to prove that I could shut you up."

Mihawk pulled his hands out of his pockets and went to the table. "Fine, Nami. Let's see you work with something other than a semi-automatic handgun."

Nami followed his hands as they touched every piece on the table but never settled anywhere.

"What are you trying to prove? Want to give me a bazooka?"

Mihawk looked over his shoulder with an eyebrow raised, "That's saved for a special occasion."

Mihawk suddenly threw an object at her and she caught it clumsily. She looked at the three pipes. "What the hell is this?"

Mihawk took a staff off the table. "A new toy. I think it would fit you just fine. I call it the Clima-Tact."

Nami looked it over skeptically, "Clima-Tact? What the heck does it do?"

Mihawk charged for her and she aimed one of the tubes at him, which shot him with a bullet of electricity. He dodged it easily but chased after her anyway. Nami flustered and tried to assemble the contraption as Mihawk came for her. "Agh! Mihawk! You never told me how to use it!"

Mihawk smiled as he brought his staff down on her head. "Figure it out, Nami!"'

Mihawk and Nami continued to spar and rumble as Boa picked herself from the decaying table that shattered underneath her. She wiped her lip and fumed, "You dare make me bleed my own blood?"

Zoro put his hands up and bounced back and forth, waiting for her to charge at him again. "Well, it can't be my blood, now can it?"

The sun started to sink behind the treacherous trees that enclosed the ruin in shadows. Zoro panted as sweat dripped off his nose and brow, and Boa, though not as sweaty, huffed quietly in front of him.

"Not bad for a beginner."

Zoro smirked, "Not bad for…someone who refused to tie up her damn hair and only wore heels."

Boa tossed her locks once again over shoulders, though the sweat made strands stick her body. "I like to have it pulled."

Mihawk's shoes clapped on the floor as he and Nami re-entered the room. He approached Boa with a glow on his face, sweating himself from his workout with Nami. His hands played with the ends of her hair and whispered, "Cara mia, don't tease me like this. To see you panting and all…hot…makes me remember leather straps and red-hot pokers."

Boa almost purred and played with his mustache, "Hmmm, that was quite a fun day. But…I hope you didn't give Nami all the toys. You sounded unhinged…like some desperate, howling demon. You frightened me."

She paused and looked straight into his golden eyes. "Do it again," she moaned.

"Querida, at your request, I would rip out my eyes. At your command, I would crawl on my belly through hot coals and broken glass."

Boa turned to place kisses towards his lips but never touched them, as Mihawk suddenly found a need to trace his fingertips across every portion of bare skin he could find. She looked into his eyes with voracious covetousness, "Why wait, my dearest?"

Zoro made a disgusted face and Nami joined him, hands around her pipes. Mihawk and Boa were still in their embrace as Nami cleared her throat and Zoro scratched his head is annoyance and embarrassment. The couple looked at the younger pair and smiled. Boa spoke softly, "Oh, you're still here? Would you like to join-"

Nami quickly pulled Zoro by his shirt collar and moved towards the door. "Uh, n-no, thank you, Boa."

Zoro stumbled behind her and was eager to make an exit. He pressed his face to her ear and whispered, "Are they always like that?"

Nami grew warm at his breathe by her neck and let go of him so that she could have some space to herself. "Yeah," she mumbled, "Guess the sex has to be that good to leave an empire for."

Zoro shrugged as he glanced behind to see the two in a heated hold. Mihawk bit her ear and she sighed into his body, her eyes on Zoro the entire time. Zoro suddenly felt awkward so he picked up his pace and almost toppled Nami.

"Oi, Zoro, watch it! You almost fell on top of me."

Zoro tried to pay her no mind as he shook his head from the visual of Boa and Mihawk entangled together. "Sorry, I just need to shower…I feel extra gross today."

"Yeah, with the dried dough and sweat...me too. My place is closer, so let's go", Nami spoke swiftly as the moans grew louder behind her. Her pink ears were the only indication that she heard and recognized what was happening in the decrepit building behind her.

Neither Zoro nor Nami thought that showering together in Nami's apartment was out of the norm anymore, and Mihawk and Boa simply did not care to let the youths' unresolved sexual tension ruin their state of ecstasy. However, Boa and Mihawk did pull away briefly to look at the young couple and they smiled. To them, it was like looking back in time for a moment.

Music Inspiration/Theme: "Toyko Drift" (KVSH Trap Remix)

I know, I know. Between Perona and these two...I'm really exploring the BDSM community. Consider it me trying to fix the tragedy that is Fifty Shades of Gray.

Side note, Count Chocula, Google it. It's funnier if you get what I'm talking about. Also, how much do you hate it when text isn't translated? I kinda like keeping it as is, and I know...technically Boa would be Greek and Mihawk would be Transylvanian, i.e. Romanian so he would speak that or Hungarian or English, Lithuanian, Bulgarian, Serbo-Croatian, Russian, Slovak, Romani, Ukrainian, and German. BUT- it's French and Spanish per Morticia & Gomez Addams. I am trying really hard not to go back and edit previous chapters (also I deleted them after I publish them so...) because I do have a tendency to edit even after the fact, so forgive me if there may be grammatical errors, but you can't catch them all:P

Regardless, hope I still have you reading along. Be patient. The lemons will be there...eventually...and also, please please give feedback whenever possible. It makes me feel like I'm not talking into the void. Haha!