HOUSEKEEPING EXTRA WORK SCHEDULE
The room was lit green from the time rotor.
"Right then, Ross Tyler, you tell me. Where do you want to go? Backwards or forwards in time? It's your choice. What's it going to be?" The Doctor smirked.
"Uh…forwards."
The Doctor hit a button, and flipped a switch before turning back to Ross.
"How far?"
"One hundred years."
She turned to the console and rolled the time rotor one hundred years. She flipped a lever, and twister a knob, setting the TARDIS into motion. Once they've landed, she smiled and pointed to the door.
"There you go. Step outside those doors, it's the twenty second century."
Ross looked at her in amazement. "You're kidding."
"That's a bit boring though." She grinned at him. "Do you want to go further?"
"Fine by me."
The Doctor rolled the rotor once more, and they traveled through the time vortex. Seconds later the TARDIS stopped.
"Ten thousand years in the future. Step outside, it's the year 12005, the new roman empire."
"You think you're so impressive," he grinned at her.
"I am so impressive," she feigned being offended.
"You wish," he laughed.
"Right then, you asked for it. I know exactly where to go. Hold on!"
The TARDIS once again travelled through the vortex. Once they arrived, the Doctor dinged the bell for effect. She stood back smiling.
"Where are we? What's out there," he asked excitedly.
She just gestured to the door. Ross slowly walked over to the door, and stepped out. The Doctor followed him out and walked over to the wall. She soniced a panel causing the observation shield to lower. She stepped down to where Ross stood.
"You lot, you spend all your time thinking about dying, like you're going to get killed by eggs or beef or global warming or asteroids. But you never take time to imagine the impossible, that maybe you survive. This is the year five point five slash apple slash twenty six. Five billion years in your future and this is the day-" she looked at her wrist watch. "Hold on…" The sun suddenly flared and turned red.
"This is the day that the sun expands." She turned and looked at Ross. "Welcome to the end of the world." She bumped his shoulder with hers. "C'mon, let's go join the party."
The Doctor led him out of the door of the gallery, and into the hallway. They both began to walk towards the main area.
"Shuttles five and six are now docking. Guests are reminded that Platform One forbids the use of weapons, teleportation and religion. Earth death is scheduled for fifteen thirty nine, followed by drinks in the Manchester Suite," the computer announced.
They continued walking down the hallways.
"So, when it says guests, does that mean people," Ross asked.
"Depends on what you mean by people." The Doctor continued to walk without a care in the world.
"I mean people. What do you mean?"
"Aliens," She said, as if it was the most obvious thing.
They turned a corner. The Doctor stopped in front of a door, and took out her sonic.
"What are they doing on board this spaceship? What's it all for?" Ross continued to ask.
"It's not really a spaceship, more like an observation deck," she explained. "The great and the good are gathering to watch the planet burn."
She began to sonic the panel on the wall. She smiled to herself as the door opened.
"What for?"
"Fun."
They entered the observation gallery. A massive window stood at the other end of the room, displaying the Sun and Earth.
"Mind you, when I said the great and the good, what I mean is, the rich," the Time Lord informed her new companion.
"But, hold on. They did this once on Newsround Extra. The Sun expanding, that takes hundreds of years."
"Millions," she corrected. "But the planet's now property of the National Trust." She pointed to the satellites around the Earth. "See down there? Gravity satellites holding back the Sun."
Ross shook his head, confused. "The planet looks the same as ever. Thought the continents shifted and things."
"They did, and the Trust shifted them back. That's a classic Earth. But now the money's run out, nature takes over."
"How long's it got," Ross asked, sounding almost heartbroken.
The Doctor checked her wrist watch.
"About half an hour and the planet gets roasted."
Ross looked at the Doctor almost admiringly.
"Is that why we're here? I mean, is that what you do? Jump in at the last minute and save the Earth?"
"I'm not saving it. Time's up," she stated, and popped the 'p'.
"But what about the people," Ross asked concerned.
"Oh, it's empty." She reassured him. "They're all gone. No one left."
"Just me, then," he spoke quietly.
The Doctor was about to comfort him when a blue-skinned person with golden slit eyes strode towards them.
"Who the hell are you," he asked rudely.
"Oh, that's nice, thanks," the Doctor shot.
"How did you get in? This is a maximum hospitality zone. The guests have disembarked. They're on their way any second now."
The Doctor took out her psychic paper, and showed the blue man.
"No, that's me. I'm a guest. Look, I've got an invitation. Look. There, you see? It's fine, you see? The Doctor plus one. I'm the Doctor, this is Ross Tyler. He's my plus one. Is that alright?" She placed the psychic paper back into her pocket.
"Well, obviously. Apologies et cetera. If you're on board, we'd better start. Enjoy."
The steward walked away and over to the lectern. The Doctor quietly spoke to Ross.
"The paper's slightly psychic. It shows them whatever I want them to see. Saves a lot of time."
"He's blue," Ross stated.
"Yeah."
"'Kay," Ross answered, accepting the fact.
"We have in attendance the Doctor and Ross Tyler. Thank you. All staff to their positions," the steward announced.
A bunch of tiny blue staff members hurried to their positions. The steward continued to announce names.
"And now, might I introduce the next honoured guest? Representing the Forest of Cheam, we have… trees. Namely Jabe, Lute, and Coffa."
A shorter bark skinned man entered the room with his two larger escorts. He was beautiful… in a manly tree way. They started to walk over toward the Doctor and Ross.
"The gift of Peace. I bring you a cutting of my grandfather." Jabe gently handed a potted twig to the Doctor. She grinned and handed it off to Ross.
"Thank you. Yes, gifts!" She patted herself down, quickly thinking.
'They're trees. They should like air, yeah?'
"Er, I give you in return air from my lungs."
She gently blew on Jabe's face.
"How intimate," Jabe spoke, slightly surprised.
"There's more where that came from," the Doctor grinned, internally laughing that that actually worked.
"I bet there is," Jabe smiled before continuing on.
This continued on for a bit. The Doctor couldn't help but laugh when Ross got spit in the face by the Moxx of Balhoon.
"And last but not least, our very special guest. Ladies and gentlemen, and trees and multiforms, consider the Earth below. In memory of this dying world, we call forth the last Human. The Lady Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen."
A face in piece of thin skin stretched in a rectangular frame was wheeled in. Her escorts were two men hidden in top-to-toe hospital whites. The Doctor grinned, silently laughing.
"Oh, now, don't stare. I know, I know it's shocking, isn't it? I've had my chin completely taken away and look at the difference. Look how thin I am! Thin and dainty. I don't look a day over two thousand. Moisturize me. Moisturize me." She spoke that last part quietly to her escorts. One of her them used a pump spray on her skin.
"Truly, I am the last Human. My father was a Texan; my mother was from the Arctic Desert. They were born on Earth and were the last to be buried in its soil. I have come to honour them and say goodbye. Oh, no tears, no tears. I'm sorry."
Ross slowly walked toward the 'last Human' to investigate more. The Doctor watched, slightly concerned. She hoped he wouldn't react badly.
"But behold, I bring gifts. From Earth itself, the last remaining Ostrich egg." One of the blue workers brought it out and presented it. "Legend says it had a wingspan of fifty feet and blew fire from its nostrils. Or was that my third husband?" The Doctor stifled a laugh.
"And here, another rarity." A 1950's juke box was wheeled in. "According to the archived, this was called an iPod. It stores classical music from humanity's greatest composers. Play on!"
One of the little attendants pressed a button, and a 45 was selected. The strains of Tainted Love by Soft Cell started to ring out. The Gallifreyan laughed and bobbed her head to the music.
"Refreshments will now be served. Earth death in thirty minutes," the steward announced.
The Doctor watched as Ross ran out of the gallery. She started to go after him, but was stopped.
"Doctor?"
She turned around to be flashed by a camera that Jabe was holding.
"Thank you."
The Doctor continued on. 'That was weird,' she thought to herself.
She was halfway down a hallway when an announcement was made.
"Would the owner of the blue box in private gallery fifteen please report to the steward's office, immediately. Guests are reminded that use of teleportation devices is strictly forbidden under Peace Treaty five point four slash cup slash sixteen. Thank you."
"Opps! That would be me. Better go make sure they don't break my TARDIS," she spoke to herself.
The Doctor went off towards private gallery fifteen to see the tiny attendants starting to lift the TARDIS onto a cart.
"Don't break it now! She's older than your entire race!"
One of the tiny attendants approached the Doctor with a clipboard.
"Name?" It asked in a high pitched voice.
"The Doctor."
"Your ship will be taken to Dock three."
The Doctor saw the attendants roughly wheel the TARDIS away.
"Oi, now, be careful with that. Park it properly. No scratches." The Doctor told them.
The attendant with the clipboard handed the Doctor a ticket that said 'Have a nice day'. She shoved it into her pocket, and continued back on her search for her pink and yellow human. She didn't have to go far. Ross was in the room they took the TARDIS out of.
"What'd you think, then?" She asked as she took a seat on the stairs.
"Good. Yeah, fine. Once you get passed the slightly psychic paper." There was a small awkward pause before Ross spoke again. "They're just so alien. The aliens are so alien. You look at 'em and they're alien."
'That's not racist at all,' she thought sarcastically.
"Good thing I didn't take you to the Deep South," she commented.
Ross leaned back and started to take in the Doctor.
"Where are you from," he asked.
"All over the place," She said quickly.
"They all speak English," Ross went on.
The Doctor relaxed a bit, knowing Ross didn't pry on where she was from. She wasn't ready for that.
"No, you just hear English. It's a gift of the TARDIS. The telepathic field gets inside your brain and translates."
"It's inside my brain," Ross asked, annoyed.
"Well, in a good way," she reassured.
"Your machine gets inside my head. It gets inside and it changes my mind and you didn't even ask," Ross fumed.
"I didn't think about it like that…"
"No, you were too busy thinking up cheap shots about the Deep South. Who are you, Doctor? What are you called? What sort of alien are you?"
'Not this again,' she internally groaned.
"I'm just the Doctor."
"From what planet?"
She scoffed, "Well, it's not as if you'll know where it is!"
"Where are you from," Ross demanded.
"Why does it matter," her voice started to rise.
"Tell me who you are," yelled the Human.
The Doctor was beyond livid at this point. "This is who I am, right here, right now, all right? All that counts is here and now, and this is me."
"Yeah, and I'm here too because you brought me here, so just tell me!"
The Time Lord quickly got up and descended down the steps to stand in front of the observation window. She needed a minute to breathe and control her emotions. The Time War was still fresh in her mind. Just thinking about it physically brings her pain. She wasn't ready to talk about it. Let alone to Ross who can hardly handle these prissy rich aliens.
Ross slowly stepped down beside the Doctor. He approached her like he would a frightened animal.
"All right. As my mate Shane says, don't argue with the designated driver." Ross then took out his phone.
"Can't exactly call a taxi. There's no signal. We're out of range. Just a bit."
The Doctor took a breath before turning towards him.
"Tell you what," she grabbed his phone, and began to take it apart. "With a bit of jiggery pokery…"
"Is that a technical term, jiggery pokery," Ross grinned.
"Yeah, I came first in jiggery pokery. What about you?" She gave him a small smile.
"No, I failed hullabaloo."
The Doctor placed a universal signal device into the back of the phone. She knew buying an extra one in the year 5023 would come in handy. She passed it back to the boy.
"There you go."
She watched as Ross stepped away to call his mum. She spoke again once their conversation was over.
"Think that's amazing, you want to see the bill."
"That was five billion years ago. So, she's dead now. Five billion years later, my mum's dead."
"Bundle of laughs, you are," she commented.
Just then the space station began to shake. Once it was over, the Doctor paused for a brief second before smiling.
"That's not supposed to happen."
She knew this wasn't going to be a vacation. Something dangerous and exciting seemed to happen everywhere she went. The Doctor absolutely loved it.