Sixteen - Amortentia (Love potion)
This potion will make the drinker love someone to the point of obsession. First, they will kill others to keep them away from their love, then the potion will ferment in their stomach and become more potent until they kill both the object of their obsession and then themselves to ensure they are together forever.
I'm marketing it as 'Fair Verona' for reasons I suspect only muggleborns will understand. (Pure bloods will simply have to take my word for it that it is very clever.)
Made by dropping a black rose into the potion as it is boiling.
Seventeen - Fake tan
A must have for witches and wizards this summer, are you beach body ready?
Well thanks to Longbottom you may decide to just cover up and stay indoors (A choice I fully endorse). Intended to provide a fake tan with a subtle glow when applied to skin, Longbottom's unique variation instead turns the top layer of skin bright red as it burns it away.
Then the next layer Orange.
The next yellow.
Green.
Blue.
Indigo.
Violet.
Then back to red again but this layer is just blood because there is no skin left.
(People need skin.)
Made by adding chameleon scales to the potion between each of the other ingredients in a standard fake tan potion.
Eighteen - Everlasting wood lacquer
An acceptable wood lacquer unless you apply more than two layers, at which point it will animate any wooden item of furniture to a sentient state with the rage of a Whomping Willow and the tenacity of a bloodhound. Angry furniture is no joke people. Keep an axe to hand if you wish to try this.
The lacquer aspect will make the object beautiful and shiny as well as ridiculously strong. If you have never wondered if you can win a fight against a chest of drawers let me assure you now, you cannot.
Effects achieved by mixing a simple wood varnish with an invigoration potion (Because he apparently learned nothing from the Veritaserum incident) and a spoonful of chilli pepper seeds.
Nineteen - Dreamless sleep potion
He somehow managed to create a Sleepless dream potion instead. Keeps the drinker awake but vividly hallucinating.
Not strictly lethal, but if left to their own devices the individual will eventually do something stupid like jump out of a window thinking they can fly. It's entertaining up until that point though.
Made by adding the duck feathers from a stuffed pillow. (I don't know why. Why does he do these things?)
Twenty – Wolfsbane
It does exactly what it is supposed to do. The only difference is, instead of the disgusting sour milk taste of traditional wolfsbane potion, Longbottom's version tastes like strawberries.
I'm regarding this as his greatest failure.
The danger it poses is simple; watching the misery on the face of the werewolf I am forced to brew this for each month as he drinks it, is one of the few joys left in my life and without it I will undoubtedly resort to mass murder.
I'm not sharing this recipe with the world. I'm dropping it in the hole Number Thirteen burned into my classroom floor.
Enjoy your sour milk Lupin!
The reason I'm not strictly linking this with the Secret Potions Club is because this version of Snape is 1000% more of a dick than the SPC one. And I am loving writing it.
For anyone who is unaware; "Two households, both alike in dignity, in fair Verona, where we lay our scene." is the opening line of Romeo and Juliet.