He heard the audible smack as his fist made contact with his opponent's jaw, sending him falling to the ground with a groan. Hawk stood there, catching his breath for a second, raising his arm for another attack even as his adversary scrambled to sit up and shuffle backward on his hands and feet to get some distance between them. But the parked vehicle trapped him.
There was Miguel now, sitting on the ground, his back against the car. Hawk's eyes were drawn to the bit of blood trickling from his split lip; the same blood that was smeared on his knuckles right now.
The pounding in his ears blocked out the craziness around them in the big parking lot at the All-Valley Arena. He couldn't hear whatever it was Sensei Lawrence or Mr. LaRusso were yelling as they ran over. He didn't pay any attention to the other students, wherever they were at. He didn't even hear Sensei Kreese's order, even though he knew what he'd said anyway. Do it. Finish the fight. Miguel had chosen his side, he was the enemy, and the enemy didn't deserve mercy.
But Miguel wasn't supposed to be his enemy.
His frazzled brain flashed. Miguel on those stairs. Unresponsive. Hawk's chest hurt thinking about it. He wanted to remember something better. Their encounters at the park instead. Miguel giving him that look. Leaning forward. Kissing him….
The memories made his fist uncurl and his arm slowly fall from its position of attack.
He'd done the things he'd done so none of them at Cobra Kai would ever be hurt again. He wasn't supposed to be the one hurting Miguel himself. Sensei Kreese promised they'd never lose if they listened to him, but he'd also said Cobra Kai was a brotherhood. Miguel was his friend. He was something more, even. Or at least he could have been if things had turned out different.
His delay gave Miguel enough time to scramble up on his feet. He raised his hands in a defensive position, but when their eyes met both of them knew the fight was finished. Neither had ever wanted this in the first place. Their rivalry was only supposed to be fun, one where they could have brought out the best fighter in each other.
This, however?
Hawk shook his head and staggered a couple of steps backward, right into Sensei Kreese. When he turned around, he saw the harsh disappointment in his Sensei's narrowed eyes and grim frown. He didn't need to hear the words spoken. Hawk knew by that look. He'd failed him. And by failing him, he'd lost the war for Cobra Kai. There was no way the night was going to go as Sensei Kreese planned if he wouldn't continue fighting.
"So, what's your big move this time?" came Sensei Lawrence's voice as he and Mr. LaRusso caught up to them. Hawk watched Sensei Kreese's icy glare sweep over to his rival for the future of the Cobra Kai dojo; he saw the way he sneered at his challenge. "Looks like you're out of students, asshole. Who's the loser now, huh?"
Hawk felt like the weight of failure on his shoulders was going to crush him as he heard that taunt from Sensei Lawrence, and received the intense scowl of contempt from Sensei Kreese he was getting now. Failure was not an option. But Miguel meant too much to him to go through with it, even if it meant losing.
"We'll see who's the loser, Mr. Lawrence," retorted Sensei Kreese. Hawk yelped as Sensei Kreese grabbed the back of his jacket collar and yanked him towards him. Before he knew what was happening, an arm snaked around his neck and clenched, hard. A cold terror flushed through Hawk in that instant as Sensei Kreese cut off his windpipe with his grip, and his hands flew up on reflex to try and pry the arm off of it.
"Let go of him, Kreese!" demanded Sensei Lawrence.
Hawk felt the arm squeezing his neck tighten more when Sensei Kreese declared, "One way or another, this war is ending tonight." Hawk strained in to take a breath but to no avail. And when he tried to break out of the stranglehold, the King Cobra wrapped his other hand under his arm and locked him in, immobilizing him.
Sensei Lawrence raised his balled fists threateningly, taking a step forward. "Let him go, or I'll end you."
"Heh, that's more like it, you pushy bastard," chuckled Sensei Kreese, holding Hawk firm even as he continued to struggle, trying his best to get out of the old man's grip.
Sensei Lawrence took another step, only for Mr. LaRusso to stay him with an extended hand. "This is crazy, Kreese," he tried to reason. "The police are on their way. What do you think is going to happen?! Do you really want to spend the rest of your life in prison? Just let the boy go."
Another chilling laugh came out of Sensei Kreese, like the threat entertained him. "Always trying to live up to Miyagi's horseshit, right to the end, huh, LaRusso? But you've never really believed any of that, have you, Johnny? You're a winner, right? Come on. Just like I taught you, mercy is for the weak. If you want the kid, you know what you'll have to do, don't you? But you'd better hurry up and do it. I don't think he has much time left for you to think it over."
Hawk's vision had blurred. He couldn't make out Sensei Lawrence anymore. But in his place, as he felt his lungs burning for want of air, another memory surfaced to the forefront of his foggy mind. That day long ago in the Cobra Kai dojo. All of them sitting in a circle around the mats. Sensei Kreese had his arm around Sensei Lawrence's neck.
Two difficult choices. What do you do….?
His head was swimming. He couldn't breathe. He was going to pass out.
You damn the consequences and power forward.
"Come on, Johnny," baited Sensei Kreese. "Do it. No mercy."
With his last ounce of strength, giving it everything he had left, Hawk shot out his foot behind him, landing his heel squarely against Sensei Kreese's kneecap. The old man let out a horrific, blood-curdling scream and the two of them crumbled to the ground instantly. Only then did Sensei Kreese released his hold on Hawk, rolling over him to grasp at his busted knee with both his hands with a groan and strong hiss of breath between his teeth.
Then Sensei Lawrence was there, prying Sensei Kreese's weight off of Hawk, grabbing the old man's coat lapels with one hand while he raised his other fist to strike. But Hawk didn't wait around to watch what would happen. He scrambled to his feet and took off.
"Hawk, wait!"
Was that Miguel's voice? He couldn't tell with blood still thundering in his ears, and he didn't stop running to verify. He darted between the cars, putting distance between him and everyone else. He wasn't supposed to run away from a fight but he couldn't help it. This was too much.
He didn't get very far before his senses overwhelmed him. His heart pounded in his chest so hard he thought it was going to burst in his ribcage. Sliding down against a van until he settled on the pavement, he gulped down lung-fulls of air over and over again, hyperventilating; worried if each breath might be his last, even now away from the immediate danger.
Hawk didn't know how long he sat there like that. Everything started to feel opaque, like it wasn't real.
He'd expected anger from Sensei Kreese. Punishment, too, because Sensei had made it perfectly clear in the past that was what happened to losers in his dojo. But this?
Recollections of the previous five months Hawk had spent training with Sensei Kreese hit him hard, all at once, particularly the time alone they'd had shared with one another. Every single instance Sensei Kreese had made him feel special, like he understood him on a level no other adult had. How he'd never treated him like a child. The advice he'd given him, all the stories he'd shared. The times he'd seemed to care. Had all of it been one big lie?
Like a balloon released of its air, Hawk deflated. He wanted to run home right then and tell his parents, hoping they would know what to do. So much for being a tough soldier. He felt more like a little kid than he had in over a year. But how would he ever explain any of this to them? What would they say?
"Are you okay?" Hawk lifted his head. There was Miguel, staring at him. His eyes were as wide as saucers, his eyebrows practically touching his forehead. And to think Hawk had thought his friend should've been the one worrying about Sensei Lawrence hurting him….
Hawk's eyes were drawn to Miguel's bottom lip again. "You're bleeding," he murmured, his voice hoarse.
Miguel raised his fingers to his lip, wiping the rest of the blood away that had trickled down his chin before sitting down next to him. And Hawk looked down at the knuckles on his right hand, seeing Miguel's blood still there, too. He'd done that. He'd fought his best friend, he had dragged him into the war, he'd made him bleed, he'd hurt him, and for what? It had all been for nothing.
His chin quivered as he stuttered out, "I-I'm sorry." He had so much he wanted to pour out to Miguel right then, but his words left him. All he could manage was, "You tried telling me. I should've trusted you."
"Dude, I knew Mr. Kreese was out there but I didn't think he'd ever do something like that," said Miguel, his voice shaky, running a trembling hand through his dark hair. He looked as shocked as Hawk felt, with his slack jaw and glazed-over brown eyes. How had it been for Miguel to watch and be able to do nothing, Hawk wondered? Had he felt as helpless as he did that day of the school fight, watching Robby kick him off that balcony? "Jesus, he…he really tried to…."
Hawk's hand ghosted over his neck. His mouth twisted in distress and he shrank into his shoulders, raising his other hand to grip the side of his head. It was hard for that to sink in, but it was true. Sensei Kreese had tried to kill him. He had meant nothing to his Sensei in all the time he'd spent with him. He was merely a pawn in his war games.
And he'd fallen for it. Completely. For all his attempts to look out for Miguel, to try and keep Miguel from being duped, of accusing him of having his head messed with by a Sensei who didn't care about him, he hadn't seen that he was the one too stupid to realize he was being played with.
Miguel turned his head at the sound of footsteps approaching, and someone appeared around the side of the van. It was Sensei Lawrence. "Diaz, give us a second," he instructed, gesturing for Miguel to get up and move. Hawk narrowed his eyes. Not him.
Sensei Lawrence gave Miguel a quick, comforting pat on the back as he stepped away before he turned his attention on Hawk. For a long moment, he stared at him, saying nothing, his jaw clenched like he was struggling to swallow something hard down his throat. What was he going to do now? Yell at him? Accuse him of betraying him? Tell him he got what he deserved?
"Hawk…." Sensei Lawrence knelt down and reached out a hand to lay on his shoulder.
"No!" He yelled, recoiling from the touch and shoving him back. "Get away from me!" He wanted to scream at Sensei Lawrence, to hit him over and over again until all of the rage was out of him. But he had no more fight left in him. It had been depleted. So he instead buried his face in his knees, clenching his eyes shut, willing it all to go away.
However, Sensei Lawrence didn't leave. He stayed where he was, kneeling there in front of him, letting out a sigh. "I know you're pissed at me right now," he said. "Have been for a while. And I'm not gonna sit here and tell you to get over it. Hell, I'd probably be pissed at me, too."
Hawk lifted his head a little at that acknowledgment, cracking his eyes back open. Sensei Lawrence's expression was stretched really tight, but Hawk saw the way he rubbed a hand all the way down his haggard face, noticing how his fingers grazed his neck delicately once he reached it; if nothing else, his concern seemed genuine.
"I also think I have a pretty good idea about what you're feeling, believe it or not. Because I was in your shoes once," admitted Sensei Lawrence. "I don't want you to deal with it alone, alright? I know it sucks to be alone. I want to help you. And listen, you don't gotta give me an answer right now. Just know, I'm here for you."
Hawk had no answer to give at the moment, which he supposed was better than a flat out refusal. He fought against his inclination to believe this was all another setup, that Sensei Lawrence was manipulating him, just as he believed he had manipulated Miguel during his recuperation. None of that made sense anymore, though. Sensei Lawrence had tried to rescue him from Sensei Kreese. And he'd never made an offer like this before, ever, even when he was his Sensei.
"I remembered what you taught us," Hawk mumbled. It was strange. Hawk thought in a battle for survival, in the heat of moment, it would be Sensei Kreese's ruthless advice that would keep him safe. But it had been Sensei Lawrence's words that came to his mind back there. It was Sensei Lawrence's lesson that had saved him from being choked to death.
A small smile came over Sensei Lawrence's face. "Yeah, I saw."
"A Cobra slithers, right?" Miguel had returned, standing there with his hands in his jacket pockets.
Hawk's mouth twitched. Could he even call himself a Cobra anymore after tonight?
Casting a glance over to where the fight had taken place, crowded as it was by not only the other dojos but also dozens of bystanders, Miguel rubbed the back of his neck and asked, "About Mr. Kreese, um, Sensei, is he…?" He let the question linger, sounding to Hawk's ears like he was almost afraid what the response would be. Hawk had to admit, he might have been, too.
"Nah," answered Sensei Lawrence, shaking his head. "It's what he would have wanted. He knew he'd lost, and this was just his last attempt at a win. But Hawk here threw a wrench in that plan, didn't you? Along with a busted kneecap." He said it in as much a light-hearted way as he could muster, like he expected a chuckle out of them for saying it.
But when Hawk looked at Sensei Lawrence and saw the seriousness etched deep on his face, he wondered if his former Sensei would have taken Sensei Kreese's bait and killed the old man in order to save him. Sensei Lawrence stared back, and at that moment Hawk figured he had his answer.
"What's gonna happen now?" asked Hawk.
Sensei Lawrence rubbed his hands together, answering, "Well, first I'm probably gonna have to answer some questions when the cops get here, which should be pretty be soon. They're likely gonna ask you guys about the stuff that happened tonight, too. But I'll try and explain it to your folks. Best I can, anyways."
"Johnny." All three of them turned their heads to Mr. LaRusso, who'd made his way over to the van and found them. After giving Miguel and Hawk a quick look, he signaled for Sensei Lawrence to follow him. "We, uh, should talk about a couple things."
Sensei Lawrence nodded. "Yeah," he agreed, standing up. "Stay here, both of you."
When Sensei Lawrence walked off with Mr. LaRusso, Miguel came to stand next to Hawk, leaning against the van. At this point, they could both hear the sirens in the distance. It was an absolute mess of a night, one that didn't look like it was going to end soon enough for either of their tastes. So Hawk could feel the exhaustion coming off Miguel as his friend sighed. "Remember when I asked you if you ever missed the old days?" he asked.
Fidgeting with his hands on his knees, Hawk replied, "Yeah."
Miguel raised his eyebrows and said, "Y'know what? I really miss them now."
Hawk couldn't help but snort at that, even if it caught in his throat and sounded almost like a sob as it came out of his mouth. "Yeah. Me, too." Maybe it was selfish now to admit that. Still, just then, the thought of Sensei Kreese's war finally ending, the idea of karate going back to being primarily a sport, that sounded so wonderful.
A little grin spread over Miguel's face, and he extended his hand down to Hawk. He accepted the gesture, letting Miguel help pull him up to his feet. And when he tried taking his hand back, Miguel grasped it in both of his. He had that look on his face again.
"Miguel…."
"When everything blows over, how about coming back to Cobra Kai?" Miguel asked.
The invitation was so absurd, Hawk almost wanted to laugh. Maybe taking Sensei Lawrence up on his offer wouldn't be so bad. And he had a lot he wanted to make up to Miguel for. "What about you and me?" he asked.
Miguel squeezed his hand again. "We'll figure it out."