xXXXx
Solas led the way through the mountains, just as he had on their first arrival to Skyhold, his eyes focused with determination. Gwen rode behind him, watching him steer the horse gracefully on the crooked, rocky path.
Little was said between the small band during their last push to make it home before nightfall; everyone was exhausted. They had been on the road for days and unanimously, each traveler opted for a warm bed rather than attempt to make camp in the gently falling snow.
The evening air was cold and Gwen sat shivering on her horse even with a thick blanket draped over her shoulders. Silently though, she thanked the Maker for the chill to keep her from falling asleep at the reins. Traveling an unknown path at dusk was dangerous and she on rode with forced alertness, sparing glances behind her every so often to count the four shadowed figures riding with her.
.
After sundown hours later, the silhouette of the keep rose from the dimly lit landscape, its lights speckled on the horizon welcoming them. Gwen picked up the pace, riding ahead of her troupe as she came to the bridge, the last step of their journey.
With renewed fervor, Gwen guided the horse into a quick canter, eager to cross the threshold of her home. The Commander waited at the portcullis with a handful of soldiers and stable hands and extended his arm to wave her in, as she pulled up to his side.
"Welcome home, Inquisitor." Cullen's lips curled into a smile and he held out his hand to help her dismount.
Placing her hand into his grip, she swung her leg over the horse, glancing backwards as the rest of the group trotted to a halt.
Alistair was the first to speak and he chuckled, dismounting his horse in one swift movement, leading the reigns to the outstretched hands of a man standing beside Cullen. "Maker, Gwen, a little impatient?"
In the torchlight, she blushed and pulled her hand from Cullen's, his eyes narrowing at the man behind her and his use of casual names with the Inquisitor.
She dared to glance up, finding his eyes on her again as a blush crept up to her cheeks. "I've been gone from this place for far too long."
Cullen chuckled. "Nearly three weeks this time?"
Smiling kindly to him, she responded. "I'm truly glad to be home."
"I see you've brought some new recruits." The Commander's smile dropped and he let out a short harrumph.
"Yes… Cullen, you, uh, remember Hawke, right?" Gwen sighed as she turned awkwardly to Hawke, who took a couple steps to stand next to Gwen. His arms were crossed and eyes were squinted in a scowl.
The Commander grumbled. "Yes, how could I forget the maniac of Kirkwall? We didn't have a proper reunion when last you came to Skyhold before you were off again. You always were a bit… flighty."
Hawke took a split second to look Cullen up and down, then bit back. "Ooo, did the Lion grow a pair over the years?" The rogue narrowed his appraising eyes at the Commander. "Really rising up in the world, aren't you?" He scoffed at the ex-Templar and gazed sideways at his dwarven friend. "At least the woman who holds your leash is sane this time."
Cullen let out a light growl and clenched his fists at his side, as his features grew fierce. "Come closer and say that to my face," he managed, through gritted teeth.
"Boys." Gwen intervened as Hawke stepped closer, putting herself between them and laying a light hand on the rogue's chest. "We're all allies here. Take it to the sparring grounds if you want to attack one another." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Alistair back slowly away with Cassandra . They began unpacking their belongings from the horses.
Cullen interjected, pointing an accusing finger at the rogue. "He'd never fight fair."
"Fair should be the least of your concerns on the court: You could barely keep up with me in Kirkwall and the years haven't been kind to you." Hawke sneered.
Gwen used her Inquisitor's voice as she interrupted their seething. "Enough! You're grown men, for Maker's sake. Don't ruin my homecoming with this childishness. You're as bad as Varric and Cassandra." Exasperated, she glanced at Varric who sheepishly looked to the ground as he stood next to his friend.
"Forgive my outburst, Inquisitor." Cullen was the first to respond and he backed away, still visibly tense. "It won't happen again."
Hawke raised his eyebrows and leaned down to whisper to Gwen with a dark smirk. "He's right, you know. I wouldn't fight fair." The rogue's eyes stared venomously at the ex-Templar as he walked away to aid his soldiers with unloading packages.
The mage shook her frustrated head and shoved Hawke away from her hurriedly, before she turned to direct the soldiers.
Varric clapped his friend on the back. "Let's get you to the tavern… and out of Curly's way... Should be quieter tonight without Bull." He snorted out a laugh.
"For a spell. But shit, I'm tired, Varric. And sore." The tall rogue pulled his pack from the horse, slung it over his back and walked slowly toward the tap house, the dwarf taking a comfortable place at his side.
Cassandra had handed her reins to the nearest stable hand and pulled her pack from the horse as the argument between the Commander and Hawke arose. Since that time, she waited patiently to speak with Gwen, tapping her fingers on her crossed arms as she stood.
The Seeker saw her moment and interrupted Gwen's unpacking, coming to stand next to her as the mage pulled another pack from one of the horses. "Inquisitor, if you'll excuse me, I'm eager to rest and relax in my own bed. I will bring a parcel by your room tomorrow..." Trailing off, she raised an eyebrow and lowered her chin in a slow nod.
Gwen nodded back, understanding. "Yes, of course, Cassandra," She leaned in to whisper a response, "I can't wait to begin reading it."
"Goodnight then, I shall see you tomorrow." With that, Cassandra smiled and left, walking swiftly away from the small gathering, through the gate to the courtyard, intent on making her way to her quarters as quickly as possible.
Gwen chuckled as the Seeker picked up her pace on the stairs, feeling the same eagerness for her own bed and the privacy of her quarters.
The mage and her two remaining companions, Solas and Alistair, stood in the entryway, pulling the last of the packs and belongings off the horses, as the stable hands took each Taslin away. Soldiers were laden with the supplies and instructed by Gwen where to put each pack.
"Steady with that one." She pointed to a bundled pack being hoisted by a soldier. His face rose in question and Gwen responded. "Yes, the long one. Those are new weapons and should be taken to the Undercroft for inventory and maintenance."
"Wait, and that one there: please be careful!" She pointed with a stern look to another soldier, burlier than the others. "Those are my notes, maps, and correspondences for my advisors. Do not misplace or damage them in any way, please." He lifted the bag with a little too much enthusiasm for Gwen and she rushed to his side, reaching for the pack. "Here, I can take them myself."
A smirk began to grow on Alistair's face as he watched her for a few minutes. Fully grinning, he closed in and reached out to touch Gwen's shoulder. She attempted to pull the heavy leather satchel of parchment into her arms, with little success.
"The papers will be fine, Gwen. Give the poor man a break." He jibed.
Ending her assault on the pack and the soldier, she responded, "They are not just papers, Alistair. They're very important to me. I put a lot of time and effort into organizing them, so I'd like to make sure they're taken care of properly."
The pair began a light bickering, which caught the eye of Cullen, who finished directing the remaining soldiers to take the supplies to the correct locations at the keep.
Seeing his comrades leaving with packs slung over their shoulders, the burly soldier broke in, his voice clear and strong. "I'll make sure they get safely to the Ambassador's office straight away, Inquisitor. You have my word."
"Thank you." She managed to say, as a pink hue crept onto her cheekbones. She nodded slowly to the man carrying the heavy pack and he nodded back.
Gwen released the tension in her shoulders and turned to retrieve her personal pack from the ground.
"Inquisitor." Solas came to her side and his lips thinned into a straight sort of smile. "Would you care to continue your lessons tomorrow morning?"
"I would love it, but I'll see what Josephine has planned for me." She tilted her head in question. "Can I let you know?"
"Of course."
The elf turned to the Warden, speaking in his usual clear voice, despite the sensitive subject matter. "I shall be free most of the day tomorrow, Alistair, if you'd like to discuss your dream in greater detail."
Alistair nodded to him with furrowed brows and turned to see a curious Gwen silently questioning him. "Yes, I told him." He whispered to her.
With a twitch of a devious smirk, Solas gave them both a bow, bid them farewell, and turned on his heel to stroll up the stone stairs.
As soon as he was out of earshot, Gwen began to speak. "Why didn't you tell me Solas was involved? I could have discussed it with him on the trip!"
She stepped closer to him, her face awash with suspicion. Her voice came out in a low whisper. "Are you keeping something from me?"
Alistair's eyes closed briefly and he dropped his head ungracefully. "Solas thinks the dream was more than just a run-of-the-mill Grey Warden nightmare, but I didn't want to worry you with it." He trailed off, turning away from her to fumble in his pack.
With a loud clang, the portcullis lowered for the night and Gwen snapped her attention away from the Warden for a moment. Cullen stood with arms crossed, peering thoughtfully at Alistair as the man rummaged through his pack.
Gwen paced around the Warden with her back to the Commander as she bit her thumb in concern. Her eyes drew back to Alistair and her thoughts returned to his troubles, until she caught sight of the leather bound journal he held in his hand. A tender expression reclaimed her face as the gift she gave him last week was placed gently into her hand.
He rose and spoke softly to her. "I bookmarked the second entry. Perhaps you'll have some additional insight since you were there too."
"That was easy." Gwen smiled as she took a step closer to him.
Alistair scoffed playfully. "What good would it do to keep it to myself? I'd only waste time and thought on it, which by the way, are in short supply at the moment."
"I suppose that's fair." She nodded appreciatively, then spoke without thinking. "So, when do you want to discuss it? I have questions..."
Alistair coughed, glancing to see the Commander move behind Gwen. Silence ensued as they both remembered they were not alone.
Cullen broke the silence, and walked over to the pair, calling out to the man. "Do you remember me, Warden?"
Alistair straightened to look at the man standing before him and nodded curtly. "To be honest, at first I didn't. But during that argument with Hawke, I saw the man I met years ago at Kinloch." He moved away from Gwen, but not too far, and extended his arm to the Commander. "Well met, Cullen. I'd heard from Gwen that you were commanding the Inquisition forces. It's good to see you again and… in better health."
The two men stood facing one another, forearms embraced in the formal Ferelden greeting. Cullen stood barely taller but Alistair had broader shoulders and both had warrior's bodies: lean and muscular from training, wearing armor, and carrying heavy weapons. Alistair held his head high with poise and smiled kindly to the ex-Templar. Cullen's eyes were humble and his demeanor wavered from his normal composure.
Cullen took the man's arm in a firm grip before releasing him. "Good to… ah... see you too." His words trailed off and he rubbed the back of his neck. "Leliana should be down any moment. She's been waiting to see the Inquisitor for days, no jest. She should be ecstatic that the both of you are here." He let out a chuckle, covering his uneasiness by the change of subject.
A dark figure leaned against a shadowed stone wall in the entryway, yet unseen. At the mention of her name, she walked into the light of the torches, removing her hood to reveal the comely, red-haired rogue. "Perfect introduction, Commander."
Gwen's eyes lit up and she spun around to greet her Spymaster, their four hands clasping between them, as they exchanged warm greetings. The welcome turned into a hugging embrace and as they broke away, they spoke in low tones, the rogue's eyes darting out to see Alistair's familiar smile.
"And there he is." Leliana held her hand to him, moving to acknowledge him as well. "Alistair. It's been too long, my friend."
He leaned in as the rogue placed a kiss on his cheek. "Yes, Leliana. I daresay, you haven't aged one day since I last saw you."
The rogue waved a wild hand, dismissing his compliment, but smiled brightly nonetheless. "You on the other hand have certainly changed." She circled him, appraising him with a wrinkled brow before whispering. "You've grown up."
"And quite well, I might add." She leaned to Gwen, whispering loud enough for them both to hear. Returning to her sweet voice, she continued, "We have catching up to do, Alistair."
As the old friends spoke, the Commander came to Gwen's side and she turned to him. "So, it's Gwen, is it?" Cullen sent her an amused glance, if not somewhat annoyed. "That's quite informal of the Grey Warden."
Rolling her eyes, she responded to his weakly veiled inquiry of the nature of her relationship with Alistair. "I call you Cullen and Commander." She quipped. "What's the difference?"
"So, you're saying that anyone may call you Gwen?"
She stuttered. "Um… Sure. Any person in my inner circle, of course."
"Hm." With Cullen's bravado returning, his hand found his chin and he swaggered away, calling out behind him. "If you should require me, Gwen, I will be in my office for the rest of the night."
"Goodnight, Cullen," She droned out, hoping her tone would impede any further attempts at flirtation.
"Gwen, come here." The bard called the mage over, a hum in her voice as she crooned. "We all have catching up to do, so we will all have tea together while you're both here."
In a modest response, she agreed. "That sounds lovely."
"Also, I can see that Alistair is quite tired. Would you take him to his room?"
"I'm not really—Isn't that Josephine's duty?" The Inquisitor whispered through a smile, but nevertheless Leliana dropped a brass key into her hand.
Speaking to Alistair, the bard turned. "Normally, this is the job of our Ambassador, but she has already retired for the night. I told her I would take care of it, but I can see that Gwen is much more capable than myself." Leliana winked so subtly that Gwen squinted in the dark light, unsure if there ever was a wink to begin with, when another one flashed across the rogue's eye.
An uneasy smile spread on the Inquisitor's face. "Of course, it's no trouble. Where will he be staying?"
"In the guest quarters above the garden. The second room has clean linens and a fire burning on the hearth."
Nodding once, Gwen laid a hand on her friend's forearm. "Thank you, Leliana."
"You're welcome, Gwen." The redhead turned to walk away, stopping before she could make it two steps. "Have a good night. I'll see you at the morning debriefing. Meet us just after dawn; we have a rather full day ahead." Another subtle wink snapped across her eye, then she was off, silently creeping up the stairs to the upper courtyard.
"I wanted to sleep in!" She called out behind the rogue.
"You've been gone near a month and there are things you need to be apprised of." Leliana retorted, before continuing her graceful ascent to the upper courtyard.
The Inquisitor grumbled unintelligibly and took a deep breath. Upon exhaling she turned to the man next to her, who seemed dazed. "Is everything alright?"
Laughing and snapping to attention, he picked up his pack and slung it over his shoulder. "What a welcoming party: Cullen and Leliana, plus a dozen soldiers and servants. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed, honestly. Is it always like this?"
"It can be worse actually. We're lucky we arrived after dark." She stifled a yawn before she could continue on. "Sometimes the folks stand on the battlements with their spyglasses on the day of my supposed arrival, watching for me. When they finally see me coming from far off, they alert the rest of the Keep. The crowds can get unwieldy."
"Yes, I imagine so," he responded through a laugh.
Alistair picked up her pack, adding it to his own over his shoulder. "Shall we?"
With a nod, she led them up the stairs and onto the landing. They took a few steps into the courtyard and Gwen stopped them, gazing over to him as he held his head high, craning it around to see the expanse of the fortress.
"The days ahead will be busy, but I can take some time to show you around if you like." She smiled at him with tired eyes.
"I'd like that."
Unthinking, her words came out before she could retract them. "It's a date, then."
Gwen immediately blushed. "What I meant was—"
Alistair chuckled, averting his eyes. "I know what you meant."
In silence, they walked through the courtyard, eyes shifting left and right to see few people mingling with one another. Some nodded, others addressed Gwen with respect, using her title. She cleared her throat, taking a few more steps toward a set of ascending stairs.
He lifted his eyes to her. "So, if we're going to be here for a few days, I'll need something to do."
Sending him a sly grin, she jibed to ease her former embarrassment. "You can launder your clothes, for one."
"Ha. Ha."
"You can repair your weapons in the Undercroft, and I can requisition another gambeson for the one that was torn by the wolves. I can requisition anything you need, actually. Make me a list."
His lips thinned and he nodded. "Will I… see you? Or should I leave it with someone else?"
Gwen stopped on the first stair for a moment, his words reminding her of her duty and what it would mean for them in the next few days. "Things are going to be a bit hectic tomorrow and I just want to prepare you."
His brows formed the familiar wrinkle and raised his eyes to meet her sage-green stare. "For what?"
Leading them up the stairs, she continued on with her warning. "There are many people who need to see me and things I need to do… and I fear it's going to change how you see me."
"I'll see only you, Gwen." His eyes narrowed at her back for a moment before he looked ahead to the double doors.
Remarking boldly, she stopped short on the stair and turned to him, matching his height on the step above him. "Just don't forget that I'm the person you skinned wolves with, the one who nearly had a mental breakdown at Caer Bronach, and the delirious one who made a fool of herself in a flooded cave as she kissed you. I'm still Gwen, but here most know me only as the Herald of Andraste or the Inquisitor."
"I won't forget." His words were simple and sincere and lips curled into a tender smile.
Striding quickly up the stairs, the couple reached the main hall and together opened the large double doors, shutting them after they were through.
The main room was lit with two hearths on either side of a long corridor and the warm glow felt inviting as they stepped lightly into the empty hall. Making their way past the parallel fireplaces, they came to a heavy wooden door with no lock. Reaching her hand out, Gwen pulled it open.
Glancing behind her, she saw the Warden open his mouth to speak and she put a finger on her lips to shush him. They walked up the stairs silently and tiptoed across the balcony. Alistair heard the rhythmic sound of someone breathing and quickened his pace behind Gwen. Once they were outside again, she shut the door gently behind her.
"Who was sleeping in there?"
"Another of my people, a circle mage named Vivienne. She, um, keeps to herself mostly."
"How can she keep to herself and be one of your people?"
"We don't always see eye to eye. But she is content to stay here at Skyhold while I'm out and about. I rarely have to worry about us feuding unless I seek her out. Or she seeks me out." She lowered her voice and drew closer to him. "I suspect that she's delighted that she gets to be part of the Inquisition without getting her hands dirty."
"Ah. Yes."
They strolled down the veranda overlooking the dark gardens below. Gwen ran her hand along the cold stone balustrade as she spoke. "It's not that I dislike her; don't misread me. We share some of the same core beliefs about the Circle and agree that they're necessary, but… she's elitist and she reminds me of my Mother: refined, uptight, and outspoken. Though, my mother is a noble, and I don't think Vivienne is, no matter how hard she pretends to be. Not that it would matter, her being a mage."
Alistair cocked his head and turned his eyes to her in confusion. "You're a noble?"
She nodded. "My father is a Bann in the Free Marches. I'm the second youngest of five."
The man was taken aback. "You never mentioned this before."
"Was there ever a need?" Pivoting to face him, she stopped, crossed her arms over her chest, and huffed lightly before continuing to walk down the veranda. With Alistair following, she spun around as she spoke, her Inquisitorial composure dropping in his private company as it had over the last few weeks. "I'm a mage, Alistair. No one will marry me and I can't hold a title or land. I was sent to the Circle at age ten and only able to visit my family on weekends once a month, with a Templar escort. And that was only because my father had sway and loved me despite what I am. I enjoyed my time away from the circle, and I truly love my family, but once a month was enough to know that I wanted nothing to do with being a noble."
"I... can understand that. Except, now you do have a title and you have this: Skyhold." He waved his hand about jokingly and cast his eyes all around them as they both stopped at the corner of the walkway.
Leaning back with elbows on the parapets, she sighed. "Skyhold isn't mine; it's all of ours. And being Inquisitor is something I have to do because of this." She held out her left hand, pulling the leather glove off by the fingertips.
They stood close in the low light, peering down to Gwen's hand, the crack in her palm flickering at its fresh exposure. A sullen look crossed the Inquisitor's face before she closed her fist and tucked it in the pocket of her jacket, searching for the key to the guest room.
Holding it out to him, she spoke with a whisper, nodding to the door a few feet from them. "Here you are."
Alistair reached out to take the bronze key and his fingers brushed her palm. Her eyes shot up to his and their hands lingered in their touch. In haste, he smiled clumsily and lifted the key away.
With obvious reluctance, he pivoted and walked to face the door with his back to the Inquisitor.
He turned the key in the lock and pressed door ajar, but halted. "So, laundry and the Undercroft wherever that may be."
"You may do whatever you wish Alistair. Consider this a vacation: eat, drink, and do try to be merry."
"Will I see you at all?"
Gwen smiled back at him, forcing her thoughts to the business of the Inquisition in the days to come. With a solemn voice she answered, "I'll find you when I can."
Alistair nodded and watched her back away with a smile. "Goodnight, Gwen."
"Goodnight, Alistair."
The Warden took a step towards her, calling out as she stopped. "Wait. Perhaps I should walk you to your room."
Pointing to the large balcony at the top of the castle, she beamed and responded. "It's just back the way we came, then up to the top of that tower; I'll be fine, but thank you."
"As always, I do try to be a gentleman."
"The action isn't lost on me. I might even take your offer, but I know we both need rest." Gwen stepped toward him and dug into her bag, placing a small parcel in his hands, winking slyly as she continued to speak. "I nearly forgot: this is for tonight's snacking urges."
The Warden's smile grew to a grin and he watched her walk backwards away from him, for good this time. Then hesitantly, she turned her back and left him, walking as swiftly as her feet could move, in case she should get the urge to go back to him to continue conversing.
.
Skyhold was silent as she descended the stairs and passed through the warm main hall. Climbing the staircase into her inner chamber, she broke into a run, taking two steps at a time until she reached the top. As she opened the door slowly, she sighed with contentment.
The room was just as she had left it and there was a welcoming fire burning on the hearth. She strolled around the room and smiled, remembering moments before she left for Crestwood. Moving to her desk, she saw that the drawing of Alistair was still laid out atop his file. Brushing her thumb over his lips, she remembered the kiss again. Then dismayed, she pushed the drawing back into the envelope and sighed deeply.
She walked out onto the windy balcony and remembered the last time she stood there, she was wishing she were more of a leader to the people. Thoughts moved to Edmund again and subconsciously she pulled the pendant from beneath her armor, the metal still warm from resting against her skin.
Holding it in her hand, she spoke softly. "You're gone; I know it this time. I miss you, your confidence and strength, but I can do this on my own now. I know I can. I have new friends and allies. Rest now, forever, dear friend."
A tear left her eye and fell down her cheek. She reached behind her neck to release the chain's clasp, and Edmund's pendant fell into her hands. In a tight grip, she held it, turning back to her door.
Gwen paused before she crossed the threshold and curiously turned to look down from the balcony. Under a half moon, there stood the Grey Warden, leaning over the torch-lit balustrade staring into the dark garden below. Impulsively, she whistled and his head turned abruptly as he straightened and gave her a casual wave. She waved back, and afterward they both walked away from the cool air of night, into their respective rooms.
Tucking the pendant away in the drawer with her underthings, she let loose a huge yawn and began disrobing, placing the clothes in a basket by the foot of her bed.
The Inquisitor barely crawled under the thick, burgundy coverlet adorning her new four-poster bed, before her eyes closed and she drifted deeply into the Fade.