Author note: Fleurmione Week 2020 is here! Check the tumblr for the prompts. fleurmioneweek dot tumblr dot com
I'm not completely happy with this one but I'm tired of looking at it.
Part 4 of Ballads
Title taken from the badass song "You'll Lose A Good Thing" by Barbara Lynn
Day 1: Hospitals
I'm givin' you one more chance for you to do right
If you'll only straighten up, we'll have a good life
Cause if you should lose me, oh yeah
You'll lose a good thing
-Barbara Lynn
*•*
As Fleur was walking down the corridor of the muggle hospital, she couldn't help but compare it to St. Mungo's. The smells and the lighting were too strong and too bright. Everything about it seemed wrong. Or it could be the reason why she was here that made it so wrong.
She entered Ginny Potter's room to see her sleeping in the patient bed, and Harry, who had his arm in a sling, chatting with Hermione and Molly Weasley. The machines beeped with heart rate and oxygen monitors but aside from some cuts and bruises, Ginny appeared fine from the car accident earlier that day.
Hermione looked up at her and smiled warmly. And Fleur couldn't help returning her smile. She made her greetings to all three, got the necessary update on Ginny's condition, and then Hermione made to leave and gestured for Fleur to follow.
They walked quietly down a hallway, looking for somewhere private to talk. Hermione found a small hospital staff break room and closed and locked the door after they entered, casting a silencing charm for good measure.
"Bill already came by. I didn't expect you to come," Hermione said, sitting down in a chair at the small table in the room.
"Oui, I know. I was at the Burrow waiting for you but when Ron arrived he said you would be at the hospital for a while. She's really going to be all right? And the baby?"
"The doctors said the baby's vitals were stabilizing. She'll be moved to St. Mungo's later this evening. The pregnancy still appears healthy. Thank goodness Harry was so quick-thinking, diverting most of the impact away from their car."
Fleur nodded, took a deep breath, and sat down in a chair next to the other witch.
They looked at each other, finding comfort in their nearness as they always did, but Fleur knew it couldn't last. It never lasted.
When Fleur broke eye contact, Hermione asked, "Will you be going back to the Burrow tonight? Bill said he would. All the Weasleys are congregating there tonight."
She shook her head and said, "No."
"I won't either. You could… come over to mine. I know it's not the hotel room like we planned for tonight and we don't have to do anything but…"
Fleur cleared her throat, making Hermione stop. She placed her hands on the table, trying to use its cold smoothness to give her support.
"I told Bill yesterday I wanted a divorce."
"Oh," breathed Hermione. Fleur looked back at her. Hermione was surprised and troubled. She could see the thoughts swirling in her head. The brunette placed a hand on top of hers. "Are you okay?"
Fleur softened at the care shown to her. Hermione Granger was a kind and sensitive woman. It's partly what made this choice so hard to make.
"I'll be fine. I haven't loved him in years, you know that. It was time."
Hermione nodded and said, "Do you need to stay somewhere or help finding a flat? We have a spare room?"
"That would be a little awkward, don't you think?" Fleur asked, a bitter smile pulling up on the corner of her mouth. Hermione moved her hand off of Fleur's.
The younger witch's lips parted to speak but then closed guiltily. Fleur never could understand Hermione's reluctance to discuss their affair in any place other than the bedroom.
"I'm leaving, Hermione."
"You've said that."
"Non, I mean, I'm moving to France. To my parents' home. Tonight. That's why there will be no issue with finding a place to stay."
Hermione sat there, looking stunned. Fleur didn't know how stunned she was until she spoke.
"Okay, I'm not sure how I'll be able to explain all the visits to see you but we'll work it out."
Fleur almost felt bad for the other witch. She could see Hermione nodding to herself that their previous ways of seeing each other would not work. No more hotel reservations, no more stolen moments at the Burrow or in crowded pubs. No more lunch dates that ended up in one of their marital beds. But Hermione didn't realize the full extent of what Fleur meant.
"Mon amour, you do not understand. I'm leaving because I can't do this anymore. I cannot share my life with a person I don't love, so I'm leaving him, and I can't share you either, so I'm leaving you."
It took a while for the English witch to absorb what she'd said but when a frantic look came over her, Fleur looked away, unable to see the pain in her eyes.
"But we're mated."
Her voice was small, muted by hurt and confusion. Fleur hated it. She hated that it had to come to this.
"That's right, Hermione. We're mated. And I love you. But it was a bond we never should've sealed. When I finally revealed you were my chosen, you still decided to stay with Ron and I respected your choice. Not every bond is accepted and I tried to move on. But we were fools to think we could tempt fate and be friends. And after that fateful night a year ago when we could no longer resist our desire for each other, and we sealed our bond, I wanted to leave Bill but you chose this half-life for us instead. Something sordid, tainted. The best compromise for you but something horrible and torturous for me."
"I couldn't stay away from you," said Hermione sadly, almost apologetically.
"Nor I you," Fleur admitted stiffly.
Hermione clenched her eyes shut. "So how can you stay away from me now? I just need more time to figure out what to do."
"That's what you said before when I begged you to leave him. It's been a year!" she bit out. "How much more time…?!"
Fleur stopped yelling and took a calming breath.
In a quieter voice, she continued, "How much more time do you need, Hermione? Did you hope I would stop asking you to leave him once you became pregnant?"
Hermione turned away and was silent for several moments. "Bill told you."
"Of course he did. Your husband is very talkative with his family about your efforts to start a family," said Fleur, and she felt the bile rise up at the thought of it.
"Ron's the one who wants it. I've told him it isn't the right time."
"But you weren't going to tell me you were talking about it with him, were you? Everything about our situation is how you've wanted it. But no more. It ends."
"Why? Why now? And how? I'm your mate. How will you be able to stay away?" asked Hermione.
If it was anyone else, Fleur would've laughed at the self-centeredness of the question but she knew Hermione was asking out of a sincere need to know. It was true, a Veela would ordinarily be unable to stay away from her mate for a long period of time, needing her mate's love constantly. But she had other concerns now that took precedence which would help stifle her desires.
Fleur stood up and walked to the vending machine against the wall.
"I'm pregnant, Hermione."
At her mate's silence, she turned around. She saw a brief flash of jealousy but Hermione was smart and quickly remembered what she had said before. That only her mate could get her pregnant.
"And we weren't always careful," Hermione whispered.
"No, we weren't."
"You were going to tell me tonight at the hotel, weren't you? But then Ginny and Harry's accident." When Fleur nodded, Hermione continued. "How far along? When did you find out?"
"About eight weeks and I found out two days ago. I told Bill yesterday. He doesn't know who but he knows what it means. He knows I'm mated."
Hermione stood up and pulled her into a hug. At first, Fleur left her arms at her sides. But at the prolonged contact, Fleur slowly returned her embrace, relishing the scent of her mate.
"What can I do? What do you need from me?"
Again, Fleur's heart melted at the consideration shown to her by her mate. No anger or blame. Just love and an offer to help.
"Leave him," Fleur whispered, tears filling her eyes. "Come with us. She will need you, too."
Hermione stiffened in her arms but didn't let go. Fleur immediately braced herself. She knew what was coming.
"You could… you could still stay here," Hermione muttered. "You don't have to go back to France."
Fleur angrily yanked herself out of her mate's arms.
"You're right, I don't have to. I can go anywhere I want to keep my child safe from gossip and vitriol." She could only imagine what Molly Weasley would say once she found out she was having a child that wasn't Bill's.
"It wouldn't be like that. I could be a part of her life if you stay," Hermione said weakly.
"As what? Her mother's friend? While you stay married as if you weren't connected to her at all? How dare you expect me to lie to her? You are her mother. As much her mother as I am."
Hermione sighed. "You're right, of course. I'm sorry, I don't want her to be lied to. I do love you, Fleur."
"It's not enough! You don't love me enough. Our magic has bonded us together, showing us how perfect we are for each other, and you know this. You know that you will never be happy with anyone else. But your fear of letting people down is greater than what you feel for me. You would rather be unhappy than disappoint them, so you disappoint me instead. You hurt me instead. Your choices have proved that to me time and time again. I can't take it anymore. I can't stand seeing you with him, knowing you are mine. You are mine, Hermione!"
Hermione pulled her back into a hug. "Then stay. Please. Please give me more time to figure this out."
"Come with me, Hermione," she begged again. "The three of us will be happy together."
"I want to. I want to so badly. I could still visit you both whenever I could. But it's not the right time. Ginny just had this accident and everyone's had quite a shock."
"It'll never be the right time," Fleur sobbed into her shoulder. The pain of leaving her was unbearable. But so was the knowledge that Hermione wasn't choosing her.
"That's not fair."
"This whole thing isn't fair. You say you'll visit but in secret, non? You won't tell Ron why. You won't tell anyone that you have a child in France. But I have to be selfish now. I have our baby to think about."
"Fleur…"
Fleur stopped her excuses with a kiss, holding her so tight it strained the muscles in her arms. She could feel the other woman panicking in her arms, pressing her lips against Fleur's in a desperate bid to make her stay. Without meaning to, the passion between them was quickly set ablaze, and Fleur held on for as long as she could before temptation began to set in, her heart trying to convince her to listen to her mate's arguments. She had to get out of there before she gave in yet again.
"I love you," Fleur whispered into her mouth. Letting go of Hermione's back, she moved her hands to cup her mate's cheeks.
"Fleur, please…"
"I'll always love you." She stared into the brown eyes she adored, trying to ignore the tears and instead memorize the flecks of amber, hoping their child would have Hermione's eyes.
"Please don't do this, I love you, if you could just let me think…"
"Goodbye," Fleur said finally, pulling out of Hermione's arms and walking away. She waved her hand to undo the locking spell and opened the door.
Fleur didn't wait for a response and hurried out of the break room and towards the hospital exit. Tears streamed down her face as she heard Hermione calling out for her. But she refused to turn around. Seeing Hermione's crumpled face would weaken her resolve. She had to leave. Living like this was literally breaking her. And she couldn't be a good parent and provider for her child in that state.
A part of her did hope that this would be the thing that pushed Hermione into making up her mind, to realize what she had lost. That a broken heart and her absence would open the younger witch's eyes to what they could be together.
Maybe Hermione would finally choose her.
Fleur reminded herself that she couldn't count on this no matter how much she wanted it. Her mate had only let her down with her indecision in the past. She had to act as if this were the end or else she would drive herself mad with waiting.
Only her child mattered now.
But maybe. Someday.
Maybe.
Sorry!