TW: Mentions/depictions of anxiety/panic attacks.
I don't own Narnia or the Pevensie siblings, just the plot!
Lucy whimpered and moved to stand closer to Susan, who wrapped an arm around her. Their eyes were both glued to the water.
After an agonizing eternity, Peter finally surfaced, an unconscious Edmund tucked under his arm. Lucy gasped and Susan let out a cry of horror. "Lucy, your cordial. Now," she shoved her little sister towards the direction of the horses and Lucy ran as fast as her legs would carry her to retrieve it.
Peter had hit the water, struggling to see anything in the dark murkiness. Heart pounding in his ears, he glanced around frantically. He swam down deeper. Aslan, please help me. Left glance, right. No Edmund. Please, Aslan, please.
There he was! Edmund lay on a narrow ledge a little below Peter. Jagged, sharp rocks rose in points from the ledge behind him. Peter's heart skipped as he put two and two together. He fought his way down to Edmund, gathering him under his arm and using the ledge as a base to push off and propel him towards the surface.
When he surfaced, he had been aware of nothing else but his little brother. Peter flipped himself on his back, holding Edmund next to him, face-up, and kicked until the water shallowed. Then, he dragged him to shore. Peter immediately began chest compressions. "Come on, come on, Edmund," he whispered. Desperate tears sprang to his eyes. "Come on, Edmund."
He heard a noise behind him and glanced behind him momentarily. Lucy and Susan had jumped into the water (navigating down the rocks carefully would have taken far too much time) and were paddling towards him as fast as they could. He turned back around and focused his attention on the compressions. He gave a sob of relief when Edmund stirred and began to cough up water.
Peter got up on one knee, pulling Edmund up with him, and threw him over his knee so that his leg was pressed into Edmund's torso and Edmund's head was towards the ground. He began to pound on Edmund's back with the small of his hand, feeling lightheaded with the adrenaline rush and relief that came when Edmund finally vomited water and dinner onto the ground. Peter held him there for a moment longer, continuing to pat his back firmly. Edmund was gasping now, panting, and Peter thought that it was the most wonderful sound that he had ever heard.
Lucy was next to him, her cordial in hand. Peter sat back and pulled Edmund down with him, holding him upright against his chest, facing her. Lucy's face was rapt with focus. She unscrewed the top of the cordial and dripped the juice onto Edmund's tongue. Seconds later, they all almost collapsed in relief as Edmund's breathing returned to normal.
Peter forced his little brother back around to face him and gathered him into a crushing hug. "Are you alright?! Aslan, Ed, are you alright?!" He gasped and sobbed out, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Ed," tears now falling fast and heavy as the full weight of what had just happened dawned on him. "Edmund, oh, Ed, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." Edmund had let his forehead fall onto Peter's shoulder. Now, he lifted it a bit, trembling as he coughed and rasped,
"S'okay, Pete. Not your fault." Peter could only cry and clutch his little brother tightly, his tears picking up in relief as he watched 4 of his guards descend down the ledge by rope. They unfastened themselves, then made way towards the children, striking flint against the edge of the rock and lighting torches as they came.
"Sir, what of King Edmund?" One of the guards asked, out of breath.
"He-" Peter began to answer, but his breath caught in his throat.
"He's alright," Susan spoke shakily from behind him. "He took in a fair bit of water, but Peter revived him and Lucy has given him the cordial. He's alright."
"Aslan be praised," the same guard raised his voice, and the others, as well as Susan and Lucy, echoed. "Your majesties, when you are ready, we are prepared to escort you back to the Cair."
"Thank you, Sir Loren," Susan again spoke for Peter. "Your service is much appreciated, all of you, especially in moments such as this. Please stand by with torches and await further instruction."
"Affirmative, Queen Susan," they all replied, creating a circle of light around the 4 royals.
"Pete," Edmund spoke softly. "See here," he sat up to look his older brother in the eyes, glancing at his sisters as well. Lucy sat to his right, knees gathered up to her chest and her arms resting on them. Her face was mostly in her arms, her eyes lifted to rest on her brothers. She was shaking with tears, occasionally lifting her sleeve to swipe at her face. Susan was to his left, up on her knees, tears streaming from her eyes as well, but a considerable amount more stoic than Peter or Lucy. Her eyes were locked on her little brother. "See here, all of you." He drew in a couple deep, exaggerated breaths. Then, he took Peter's hand, placed it over his mouth so Peter could feel the air on his skin, and did it again. "I'm fine. It's alright," he continued awkwardly, rather uncomfortable with everyone fussing over him.
Lucy made a small noise next to him. Before he could turn to look at her, she had launched herself across the small space that separated her from Edmund, locking her arms tightly around his neck from behind, burying her face in the crook of his neck, and crying loudly. He reached up to place his big hand over both her small ones. Then Susan was wrapping both him and Peter up from the left, and Peter was gathering them all into him again, and there they stayed for a good while, until Peter decided it too dark to remain there any longer.
One guard per royal, and the siblings were lifted back up the side of the cliff smoothly and with no delay. Peter insisted that he and his siblings mount on horseback behind a guard on the way back to the castle, though Edmund protested that he was fine and would rather walk. Peter had gripped his shoulder firmly and reeled him in, leaning close to his ear to murmur something neither sister was able to hear. Then, without another peep of protest, Edmund had rather sheepishly skulked towards the nearest horse, extending a hand to the mounted guard, who pulled him up.
The journey back was quiet, each lost to their own thoughts, emotions, what-ifs. No one noticed (let alone could even see, in the darkness) Peter alternating between both the insides of his cheeks, biting hard to keep wave after wave of nausea at bay. No one noticed Edmund carving away at the old shackle scars on his wrists with his fingernails, either.
By the time the group returned to Cair Paravel, Lucy was fast asleep against the back of her assigned guard, and Susan was yawning as well, fighting to stay awake. Peter reached up to pull Lucy down, catching her in his arms as she tumbled. Her eyes flew open, but closed tight once more as soon as she saw who held her. Peter said nothing to anyone around him, neither reached for any sort of parcel or weapon to help unload, before he turned on his heel, disappearing towards the corridor entrance with his baby sister tightly in arm. Susan turned to the nearest guard, apologetic, but he simply dipped his head towards her, respectfully, and requested that the remaining monarchs return inside for some much needed rest and recovery. "My men and I shall see to all the rest of this. It was an honor to accompany you, m'lady," he spoke softly as Susan curtseyed.
"And an honour to have been escorted by Narnia's finest. Goodnight, Sir Uriah."
"Goodnight, ma'am." Susan turned to seek out Edmund. Her little brother was standing next to the horse he had ridden back on, hand still resting up on the front of the saddle. He stared off into space. Susan approached him carefully.
"Ed?" His breath hitched as he jumped. "Sorry..."
"What?" He asked shortly.
"Erm...come on. Let's go inside." Edmund said nothing in reply or protest as his sister placed a gentle hand on his upper back, allowing her to steer him indoors. Once there were just inside the doors, she turned to him. "I...Ed..." she tried. He looked at her, waiting. "I...I think perhaps I was rather unfair to you this afternoon. It was...unkind...of me to assume that you had done anything wrong; I should have heard you out. Or...or just shut up and been happy to have you along." She glanced at him sadly and reached for one of his hands, folding it into both of her own, studying it as she was finding it suddenly difficult to meet his eyes. Finally, she brought herself to say, "I'm truly sorry, Edmund. I shall see to it that I treat you in no such way the next time you ask to join me in any task, no matter how droll. And I hope you know I'm always pleased and grateful for your company." Edmund rewarded her with a very slight smile.
"Thanks, Susan."
"Do you forgive me?"
"Of course." And Susan wrapped her arms around his waist, the elder stopping to press a kiss to her brother's cheek before leaning in to hug him tightly.
"I'm so very glad you're alright, dear," she murmured. "You are irreplaceable." Edmund gave a little huff at that, but returned her hug all the same. She pulled away after a long moment. "Go and get some rest. I'm sure you must be exhausted."
"Yeah. You alright, Su?" She forced a smile and nodded bravely.
"Right as rain. Yourself?"
"Bit waterlogged myself. But I'll sleep it off." The quip was much funnier than it should have been to the two as they were both stressed and overtired, and they burst into a fit of giggles. Once they recovered, Susan wiped her eyes before taking Edmund's face in her head, guiding it down towards her so that she could kiss his forehead.
"I love you, Edmund. Do sleep well tonight."
"You too, Su." He nodded to her as she disappeared up the steps towards her chamber. He was about to do the same, but decided to glance behind him out the glass paneling at the entrance. From where he stood, he could see the narrow reflection of the moon off the sea. The shape of its thin reflection looked eerily familiar.
Almost, a voice seemed to whisper in his ear, like...perhaps...a wand.
Edmund shuddered before turning on his heel, taking the stairs two at a time.
Susan tossed and turned in bed for perhaps an hour, finding it much the challenge to fall asleep. She thought to herself that that must be the curse of sleep- you had to be at peace in order to get any. And how could she be, for what she and her siblings had witnessed only hours before? What an absolutely wretched day, she thought to herself bitterly. Lucy's hysteria that afternoon, Edmund's strange behavior soon after that...and then Edmund's near-fatal accident at the Cliff, Peter's quick action (without which, Edmund might be dead; she shuddered), the blood on Edmund's shirt, Peter's tears...
Susan sat up at once, swinging her legs over the side of the bed, dropping her elbows onto her knees and sucking in a deep breath. She tugged her housecoat down from where it hung and wrapped it around herself snugly. She found her slippers, put them on, and then stole out into the hallway, clicking the door shut quietly behind her.
She wasn't exactly sure where she was going. Presently, she decided that perhaps she'd take a walk down to the kitchen to fetch a goblet and fill it with cool water. The walk might help her clear her mind.
But, before she could start down the stairs, she heard voices coming from across the hallway. Peter's chamber? No, Edmund's. Susan crossed the hall quickly and pressed her ear to the door to listen. It was faint and muffled, but from behind the door, she could make out Lucy's voice, speaking rapidly. And then, to her dismay, she also made out the voice of her little brother, gasping and sobbing.
Susan swung open the door and rushed across the room to where her younger siblings sat on the edge of Edmund's bed. Lucy had both arms around Edmund, who was bent forward similarly to how Susan had been only a moment before. He sat hunched over, trembling, both hands digging into his legs such that his knuckles had turned white. He was gasping for breath and sobbing hysterically.
"What happened?!" Susan cried, dropping down on the wicker chair next to Edmund's bed and pulling it around so that she faced him. Susan reached for Edmund's hands, clutching them. She searched both of their faces. Lucy was very pale and her eyes were wide, yet determined. "Lu?"
"He's having an attack like the one I had earlier," Lucy spoke in a low voice. "Deep breaths, Edmund. In through your nose. No, no, don't gasp like that. Do it with me," and she breathed deeply and loudly in through her nose.
"But what's wrong? Why is he so upset?"
"I don't know that yet, I've only made it in here moments before you. I suspect a nightmare. Deep breaths, Ed."
"I'm calling Tumnus. He needs a physician," Susan sprang up.
"No!" Lucy's eyes snapped up to meet Susan's. "That'll do no one any good."
"Lucy, look at him! He's ill! He needs a doctor!"
"No, he doesn't! He just needs time. Just sit back down and let me help him for a bit. He just needs some time, the same as I did earlier today."
"But how do you know? Lucy, he's white as a ghost. No, I'm calling a physician. I'm not about to-"
"Do NOT call a physician!" Lucy jumped to her feet and took a step towards Susan. "He doesn't need one!"
"Yes, he does!"
"No, he doesn't!"
"How can you even say that, Lucy? You-"
"Because this happens to him all the time!" Lucy shouted. Susan pulled her head back and stared at her younger sister in shock. Her eyes were narrowed fiercely at Susan. They held depth and an understanding much beyond her 11 years, not even breaking contact when Peter ran into the room behind Susan, demanding,
"What on earth is going on? Why are you not all in your beds?!"
"All the time," Lucy repeated emphatically. "Now will you either sit down or get out before you work him into even more of a state, please." She spoke it firmly, as an order, before swiftly turning her back to Susan and returning to her place at Edmund's side.
To be continued.
A/N: I know that was a bit of a rough/abrupt ending to this chapter; I'm not in love with it. If I were to expand this chapter much more so as to reach a smoother cut off point, it would grow too long. Thank you all so much for your reviews! They warm my heart and inspire me xx