Chapter 16

Lizzy

Lizzy woke up to the sun shining through her window. It put a smile on her face, she had been looking forward to going for a walk on Hyde Park and the weather was on her side today. She wanted to go early in the morning which was the opposite of a fashionable time, but she wanted to go to enjoy the park not to socialize, she had already been doing quite a lot of that already.

After everyone was awake and eating breakfast she brought up her idea for a walk.

"So aunt, Jane, I was wondering, I would really love to be able to go to the park what do you think? The weather is perfect and we could go with the children, they would enjoy being outside instead of being cooped up all day at home."

Her aunt and Jane smiled at each other before looking at Lizzy again.

"I was wondering how long you would last before asking to go for a walk Lizzy, I must say I'm surprised you lasted this long." Jane said with an amused smile.

"Indeed my dear, I am surprised by your restraint as well."

Lizzy could see they were both making fun of her but she let them be amused if it meant that they agreed to the outing.

"Yes, I can see you are having fun at my expense but will you agree to the outing?"

Her aunt gave her a last amused smile before consenting. "You are correct it will do the children some good to be outside for a while, I'll let nanny know to get them ready."

In half an hour they were all ready to depart, and since Mr. Gardiner didn't have any pressing business until the evening he decided to join them as well. It was cold outside but the sun warmed Lizzy's face, it was early in the morning and the park was mostly empty so they let the children run around and have some fun. Her aunt didn't have much endurance walking so Jane decided to stay with her, they had found a nice bench where they could see the children play, while her uncle accompanied her in a long walk.

"Well Lizzy, what do you think of your visit so far?"

"I'm not sure what to say, it has been wonderful being with you and aunt Gardiner but so many things have happened so soon I am not sure what to make of them. Not in a bad way, it's just that things are moving faster than I thought they would. Does it make any sense uncle?"

"I understand what you mean perfectly Lizzy, things have moved quite fast since you arrived, meeting Miss Darcy, then Mr. Harrington who is an acquaintance of Mr. Darcy who we met the very next day, not to mention the incident with Miss Bingley."

"Do you think she has mentioned she saw us to Mr. Bingley?"

"Why? Do you still believe there could be hope with Mr. Bingley and Jane."

"Not really, he treated Jane so badly and after her interactions with Mr. Harrington she is doubting that she ever loved Bingley in the first place."

"That is not unusual Lizzy. Love is different every time, and while she might not love Mr. Harrington yet, it's still too early for that, she does feel an attraction. Mr. Bingley hurt her deeply and now she is a changed woman wanting something different in her future husband than she did before, so Mr. Bingley doesn't match that anymore. I think that in an effort to heal her heart faster it is simply easier to believe that what she felt for Bingley was not true love. It was, it is just different from how she feeling now."

"I had not thought about it that way."

"That is because you have not fallen in love yet."

"Were you ever in love with someone before aunt Gardiner?"

"I was, a few years before I met your aunt actually. I will not tell you the entire story, just that she married someone else, but I loved her a great deal. I also love your aunt but when I fell in love with her it was very different from the first time I had fallen in love. Not less or more just different, because you are a different person the second time around, heartbreak changes you."

"Thank you for sharing this with me uncle." And they kept walking in silence as Lizzy thought on what her uncle had told her.

Jane

While Lizzy and Uncle Gardiner walked Jane and her aunt watched the children play.

"So what goes on your mind Jane?"

"I'm not sure what you mean aunt."

"I can see there is something you are thinking about."

"It is just that everything is going a bit fast is it not? I expected things to go slower. I like Mr. Harrington but I barely know him. I do not want to get things wrong, or am I just being presumptuous? Am I imagining that I like him because he is the opposite of Mr. Bingley? I do not think so, but what he inspires in me is very different from what Mr. Bingley did."

"Those are all very good questions my dear, questions only you can answer. If you wish for my opinion, do not let doubts cloud your mind, be in the moment and see what you feeling. You have changed, it is normal that you seek something different from before and therefore that it feels different. If your uncle and I think that things are going in an imprudent way we will intervene. For now, it has only been dinner and a possible invitation to a ball. Let's see where things take us, it may lead us nowhere or to someone completely different."

"I am so glad to have you and uncle, you are such great sources of support and wisdom."

When they arrived back to their aunt and uncle's house a letter from their sisters was waiting for them. Jane felt a bit guilty for not having written since they had arrived. They decided to read the letter together, they soon realized that the letter was written in two different handwritings.

Dear Sisters,

(Mary & Kitty)

We decided that since we were spying and interfering with each other as we wrote our letters to you, it would be more practical to send you a letter from both of us. How are you both? Are you enjoying London? How are Aunt and Uncle Gardiner?

(Mary)

We have both been well, things are quieter with the both of you in London, but Mrs. Taylor is keeping us occupied. Since you both departed she has had me, practicing on the piano every day for two hours. Mrs. Taylor has also been fixing many of what she calls my bad playing habits and has also focused first on simple pieces. She says I try too much to fast and I must learn many basic things I had skipped over, but it is good as I am learning a lot. She has also declared my singing below average, which was hard to hear, but she has said that with proper teaching I could be at least not embarrass myself.

It was quite humbling to think that I was not as accomplished as I thought I was, but Mrs. Taylor did praise me saying I was much better socializing. Two days after you had both departed we were invited to a party at Lucas Lodge were Kitty and I went with Mrs. Taylor. I have to admit I enjoyed myself more than I used to. The books Mrs. Tayler has had me reading made it easier to understand our neighbors and to be able to converse with them. It is also true that our practices with Mrs. Taylor of proper subjects and ways to converse have been a great aid. Kitty was also a great help selecting not only my clothes but how I should have my hair done and any adornments, and I have never felt less plain. I will never be the beauty of the family, but I felt people watching me with surprise and many mentioned how good I looked. In the past, I would not have cared since I never thought it would be possible but it felt good not being overlooked.

(Kitty)

As Mary has mentioned Mrs. Taylor has had us quite busy. My drawings are getting quite good. Since she has already taught me all the techniques she knew she has let me paint a full-size painting of Longbourn. I have just started sketching it but I am very excited. She says that if it good enough we will find a place to hang it where it can be shown to guests.

The party at Lucas Lodge went very well as Mary has previously told you. Mrs. Taylor's teachings have also been very beneficial to me. It was strange to be there without Lydia I have to say. I know Mary has not mentioned her, but she has not improved at all. She has stopped closing herself off in her bedroom but refuses to listen to Mrs. Taylor, she hopes that if she makes enough noise Mrs. Taylor will relent but she will not. I am not so sure about father though, he is tired of her tantrums and you know that father will bend if it interferes with his peace. Now that both of you are gone she has tried to integrate herself with me again. I think she hopes to become the twosome that we used to be, her leading and me following. She still sees Mary as plain and boring so she does not feel threatened by her. It will not happen in any event, Mary and I have gotten closer since we all started with Mrs. Taylor and I have no desire to be the silly stupid girl I used to be when I followed Lydia. But I am not sure how this situation with Lydia will end, to be honest.

(Mary & Kitty)

We hope things are going well for both of you in London and please do write back soon, we wish to hear about everything that is going on with you.

Your sisters,

Mary and Kitty

"They seem to be doing well but I worry about Lydia" Jane looked at Lizzy, she had not liked what Kitty had shared about Lydia either.

"It worries me as well Lizzy, but there is nothing we can do from here. Let's write them a letter together and let's wait for their next correspondence."