Crisis is here. Enjoy some Supercorp sweetness to cope.
Contrary to their first week, Kara wrapped up week two feeling like they'd started off doing well and only got better—as opposed to the week before when they were crashing and burning nearly every second. But that was pre-Sam, and adding the brunette to the dynamic had improved her life in ways she never could have imagined.
She enjoyed Sam a lot. They fell quickly into a comradery. Over the course of the second week Kara found herself liking Sam more and more, and Sam appeared to be warming up to her, too, because by day two she'd starting poking fun at Kara. As the week wore on, the good-natured jibes increased, and the blonde was shooting them right back. Then they'd each crack a grin and get back to work.
Kara noticed that any time she mentioned she was going to check on something Sam immediately hopped up and came with her. She hoped that meant Sam liked her, but she was never quite certain. She was incredibly insecure, always paranoid people were nice to her face and secretly hated her behind her back. Adolescent bullying was to thank for that, and even though she was in her late twenties, she still found the lasting emotional trauma hard to shake.
But by the end of Friday, Sam was bouncing with excitement, asking where they were going for drinks, and it made Kara's heart warm that Sam seemed to enjoy her company enough to want to do something outside of work. She'd even gotten Nia to begrudgingly agree to join, even if she'd had to bribe her with buying her first drink—Nia was a homebody and an elder in a young person's body. She liked to be in bed before midnight, and they'd wrapped around ten, so by the time they got to the bar it would most likely be close to that time.
Kara picked a different bar this time, this one closer to Nia's house in an attempt to help persuade her friend to come out. It worked, because as they left set, Nia promised she would meet them there. And when Kara texted Lena to say they'd all be meeting at Diggle's Tavern and Lena said she'd see her there, her heart soared so high that she had to remind herself to keep her cool.
But she was nervous and jittery the whole way home, and her shower did little to calm her. She didn't feel better until she took a few hits from her pipe, and by the time it was done she felt she could finally face the night.
She applied a little makeup just because she knew Lena would be there and glanced over herself in the full-length mirror on the back of her closet door. Her hair hung over her shoulders, still damp from her shower but drying into their usual, loose curls. She'd worn a grey Jaws tank top to show off her arms, because it seemed to her that Lena liked to look at them. And her jean shorts allowed her to show off the strong leg muscles she'd built after walking an average of at least ten miles a day on set over the past few years. To finish off the look she'd thrown on her pair of black, tattered Converse.
Then she was off, heading eastward to the bar. She'd asked Lena if she needed a ride, but unfortunately the brunette had turned her down. Kara tried not to let that kill her mood, not to read too much into the fact that Lena refused to spend time in a car, alone with her. But by the time she got to the bar she had to hit her vape pen before heading inside just to calm her overwhelming nerves.
Nia was sitting at the bar, her hair also wet, but now down as opposed to her usual ponytail for work. Gone also were the long pants and long-sleeve shirts she always worse onset. Instead she was wearing a cute, yellow sundress and sandals. Even though she'd dressed up, though, her face was free of makeup, yet Nia had a natural beauty without it.
They got their drinks and went to sit at one of the tables in the back. There were a few other patrons in the bar, but they were all sitting at the actual bar at the front, so the back was quieter and offered them opportunity to talk.
"Well, cheers to surviving the first two weeks," Kara said, holding up her usual vodka-Sprite to tap against Nia's rum and Coke.
"Amen to that," Nia said, returning the cheers before sipping her drink. "Dude, I was skeptical of Sam at first, but I gotta say—she's pretty great."
"Isn't she?" Kara asked, sipping her drink as well, noticing it was significantly less strong than the one Ray had made her last week. "I never have to worry about anything because I know if you or I haven't done something, she has. And if I ask her to do something, she actually does it."
"She has a lot of experience," Nia said. "I asked her what she worked on, and it's a lot. But she didn't list to me her entire work history constantly as if to prove herself like that psycho Siobhan."
"No, Sam lets her work speak for herself," Kara agreed, nodding her head.
Nia opened her mouth to say something else but closed it as her eyes went wide at something she saw over Kara's shoulder. "Shit, cast is here?"
Kara's pulse raced as she turned to see Lena and Jess standing in the doorway, looking around the bar. Her heart lifted a little at the sight of Jess. It made sense for Lena to turn down a ride from her if Jess was with her, since it was the woman's job to drive Lena around.
She raised her hand to get their attention, and Lena waved when she spotted them. Jess and Lena exchanged a few words before Lena headed to the bar and Jess came over to the table.
"Hey, guys," Jess said, dropping into a chair next to Nia, thankfully leaving the one next to Kara open.
"Hey," Kara said in response, giving the assistant a smile. "Decided to skip drinks with the AD staff this time? I heard them talking about going to Legend's again." It wasn't hard to hear. She'd been standing right next to Mike and Oliver when they were talking about it. And they certainly didn't make any indication that she was invited.
"Yeah, last week wasn't all that fun," Jess said, frowning slightly. "Mike and Oliver drank a lot of beer and then got into a loud discussion of which Terminator movie was better, the first or second." She shrugged and shook her head. "I don't have an opinion on that matter, and even if I did, it didn't matter because they never let anyone else get a word in."
"Sounds about right," Kara said as she took a sip of her drink, irritated just at the mention of Oliver and Mike. While the week had gone better, it was still obvious that they weren't her biggest fans, and they made it very clear every time they talked down to her.
"They're such assholes," Nia chimed in. "Especially that little twerp Mike. I want to wring his neck."
"Wait until after the wrap party at least," Kara joked as Lena walked up with two drinks in hand. Kara paused to smile up at the brunette. "You made it."
"I did," Lena said, glancing down at the only empty chair at the table. It just happened to be on the side of Kara. She bit her lip as she sat, placing the drink she'd bought for Jess in front of her assistant.
Not long after that Sam showed up, and Lena bubbled with jealousy when Kara lit up at her arrival. She took a big gulp of her Jameson-Diet Coke when they hugged, leaving a bitterness behind on her tongue.
"Sam, go get whatever you want," Kara said, pointing to the bar. "Put it on my tab."
Sam's eyebrows shot up. "Seriously?"
"Yes." Kara nodded enthusiastically. "I owe you one."
"Okay," Sam said with a smile, dropping her purse on the table. "Be right back."
When she walked away Kara scooted her chair slightly closer to Lena's and grabbed an empty chair from one of the other tables and placed it on the other side of her for when Sam got back. Lena wasn't thrilled that Kara seemed enthusiastic to have Sam sit near her, but she was thankful she hadn't put the other chair between them at least. She was still sitting on Kara's other side, and she noticed that her chair was slightly closer to Lena's than it was to Sam's. That observation caused her to give a half-smile before downing the rest of her drink.
"I need another," Lena announced, holding up the empty glass.
"We just got here," Jess said, eyeing Lena in amazement.
"I'm a Luthor," Lena said with a shrug. "We're known for being good at approximately two things—acting and drinking."
"I think there's one other thing you're good at," Kara muttered, and when all eyes went to her, Lena's the widest of the bunch, Kara's face went red. She tried her best to reach into the depths of her suddenly frazzled mind and think of something other than what she'd actually meant. "Uh… Fencing, right? Didn't you fence as a kid?"
Lena let out a breath and nodded. "Until my teenage years, when my mother decided it was a waste of time and that I should have been focusing on my career instead." She shrugged, frowning down at the table. "Because who needs a sport they genuinely enjoy, with teammates who were friends when they're fifteen? Much better to guest star on some dumb teen drama show for what was formerly ABC Family." Then all eyes were off Kara and on her, everyone looking at her with a mix of pity and concern. "Who wants a shot?" she offered, standing up to avoid the awkwardness she'd brought upon herself. "I'm getting us all shots."
And before anyone could disagree, she was walking towards the bar. Sam was getting a drink handed to her, and she had just started to turn to walk away when Lena approached.
"Oh, hey," Sam said, smiling at her. "It's Lena, right?"
"Yeah," Lena said, gazing over Sam momentarily. She had to admit, she was gorgeous. Her tan skin gave a healthy glow, and her long legs were muscly like Kara's. And the white tank top she was wearing showed she was intimidatingly slim. If she wasn't already infatuated with Kara or intimidated by Sam, she might have even had a crush on her herself. "I'm getting shots for everyone, if you want one," she said, because she'd have felt bad if she offered to everyone else and not Sam, despite the jealousy.
"Sure," Sam said, not even bothering to ask what kind of shot. "Want me to help you carry them?"
Lena was taken aback at the woman's jump to help, but then she remembered that Sam was crafty, so it was probably second nature to her at that point. "Okay," she found herself saying.
She ordered five shots of vodka, carrying three herself, and Sam the other two along with her drink. When she brought them back to the table, though, not everyone looked enthusiastic. Nia picked up one the one Lena had set in front of her.
"Vodka? I'll pass," Nia said, pushing the shot to the center of the table. "I'm good with this." She held up the beer Kara had purchased for her for emphasis and took a sip.
"Me too," Jess said, pushing the shot away as well. "I really only should have one if I'm driving."
"Y'all are lame," Sam said, picking up her shot. "I'm game." She turned to the blonde. "What about you, Kara?"
Kara hesitated, feeling Lena's eyes on her along with Sam's. She hadn't planned on taking a shot, but now that one was in front of her it was too tempting not to. "I'll have one and finish this drink, but that's it for me," she said, picking up her drink again along with a shot. "I have to drive home."
"What should we toast to?" Sam asked, holding out the tiny glass.
Kara smiled. "You know what?" She touched the rim to Sam's. "To Sam, for coming aboard and being genuinely awesome."
Lena fought the urge to frown, placing on a fake smile instead as she joined in the toast. "To Sam, then," she said, trying to keep the bitterness out of her voice.
They did their shots, Kara and Sam using their mixed drinks as chasers. Lena hadn't thought to get one—actually didn't need one. She slammed the vodka expertly and set the empty glass on the table upside down. Then she looked at the two remaining shots, taking a breath.
"I guess I have to finish these myself so they won't go to waste," Lena said, picking up one of them. "Unless anyone else wants one."
"Sure, why the fuck not?" Sam said, picking up the last.
"Don't you have to drive?" Kara asked, slight worry in her voice.
Lena bristled slightly at this. Kara seemed so concerned about Sam making it home safely, but she didn't even bat an eyelash when it came to her. Then again, she and Jess had come together so it was logical she assumed that they would leave together.
"I'll be fine, Mom," Sam said sarcastically. She rolled her eyes at the blonde before turning to Lena, holding out her shot for another toast. "To making movies?"
Lena almost laughed, remembering then how young Sam was. People in their early twenties seemed to sometimes think each shot had to be toasted to something. She'd been like that when she first started drinking. Then she got bored of it and just wanted to drink.
"To making movies," Lena agreed, tapping the glass to Sam's.
Nia ended up leaving first, right after she'd finished the one drink she'd agreed to. Not long after that Jess was ready to go, and since she was Lena's ride, that meant the actor should have left, too. But the disappointed look on Kara's face made Lena balk, insisting she would get herself a ride home later instead. And then of course Kara offered to bring her, just like she'd hoped, and Jess headed out, seemingly satisfied that she'd left Lena in the hands of a trusted crew member.
After that it was just the two of them and Sam. Lena tried not to be jealous of the rapid-fire back and forth Sam and Kara engaged in. From what she gathered, they hadn't known each other long, but they already spoke with the type of familiarity as if they'd been friends for years. Their banter was playful, easy, and consisted of much good-natured ribbing.
Honestly, Lena hated the way they were together. Kara smiled too much, laughed too hard, and though she tried to include Lena, the brunette was still feeling like a third wheel. She realized that Kara and Sam had spent quite a lot of time together over the past week—but it had been just that, a week. Why were they suddenly so chummy, and why did it make Lena feel so threatened if Kara was nothing but a friend, like she claimed?
Why did Lena's heart ache every time Kara laughed at something Sam said? Why did every smile sent in Sam's direction instead of hers make her burn with hatred for a woman who'd done literally nothing to her? And why did she want to possessively drape her arm over the back of Kara's chair every time Sam leaned in slightly to talk to Kara in a quieter voice?
They hardly seemed to notice when she got up and went to the bar for another drink. She got a double of Jameson-Diet Coke and an extra shot on the side for good measure, taking the shot before heading back so that the other two women would never know she'd taken it. Then when she got back to the table Kara and Sam were bent over Sam's phone, and she when she glanced at it, she saw they were looking at pictures of a baby.
"She's so cute," Kara cooed, then held out the phone to show Lena. "Look at Sam's daughter Ruby. Isn't she just the most adorable fucking thing you've ever seen?"
Lena could argue that the person holding the phone out was, yet she didn't say this. "Precious," she said hollowly, then looked to Sam. "She looks like you."
"Kind of," Sam said, giving a small frown. "I find she looks a lot like her dad, too, though. Unfortunately."
"Fuck that guy," Kara said instantly. "She's gonna grow up to be beautiful just like you. Watch."
Lena felt her heart pang, remembering when Kara had called her beautiful. She took a long swallow of her drink to wash down the bile rising in her throat at the unexpected heartache she suddenly felt.
Sam let out a snort. "Thanks, bitch."
Then Lena was angry that Sam would call Kara a bitch, soon after confused to see that Kara was smiling. Why would anyone be smiling after being insulted?
"I love you, bitch," Kara said, raising her eyebrows.
Sam broke into a grin. "I ain't gonna never stop loving you."
And then together they said loudly, in deep voices, "Bitch."
They both laughed and Lena simply stared at them, completely lost. Her face burned, realizing it was some kind of joke she wasn't in on, and she chugged half of her drink right then and there just to get over the awkwardness. When the two were done laughing, Kara looked to Lena, actual tears in her eyes from laughing so hard.
"You know that Vine, right?" Kara asked when Lena just stared at her blankly.
"Uh, no," Lena admitted.
"Oh my god, hang on," Kara said immediately, reaching into her pocket and pulling out her phone. She searched for something quickly, then held out her phone.
The video she showed Lena was really simple, just a guy barely playing a guitar and saying the words that Sam and Kara had just quoted to each other. Kara had said it was a Vine, but from the little Lena knew about it, she knew the app didn't exist anymore. This video was only six seconds long, on YouTube, and had over six million views. Yet this was the first time she was seeing it. It was slightly amusing, and maybe she'd have found it funny had she not been so upset over the fact that it was something Kara and Sam shared. Jealousy outweighed humor.
"Funny," she said blandly, taking another sip of her drink casually.
"I guess it's funnier if you see the video first," Kara said with a small smile, locking her phone and putting it back in her pocket.
"It's fucking hilarious," Sam said, picking up her own phone off the table where Kara had placed it. "But anyway… I'm gonna head out. Bar's about to close, and I gotta get some sleep before my kid wakes me up at sunrise." She frowned with a deep sigh. "Or before."
Sam's mom took care of Ruby during the week while Sam was working, and since they lived together, Sam said it was easy for her to go out. But that didn't mean she expected her mom to watch her kid while she slept in because of going out drinking.
"Yeah, we should probably close out our tabs and get out of here, too," Kara said, then turned to Lena. "Ready?"
Lena still had a couple of sips left in her glass, so she downed it in one go and nodded when she was done. "Let's go."
Sam walked with them to the bar, smiling and waving as she left them to close their respective tabs. Lena barely even glanced at how much she spent, just signed the slip and handed it back. She knew it was a lot by normal people standards—people who didn't have millions just sitting in the bank gathering dust—but to her spending over a hundred dollars in a bar was so far from concerning it was almost laughable.
Kara glanced at the slip as she handed it back, though, and her eyes went wide at the sum. But she didn't say anything about it as they left the bar and walked to Kara's waiting Jeep around the corner. The lights flashed when she unlocked it, then she was opening Lena's passenger door for her to slip inside.
"Such a gentlewoman," Lena commented as she got into the car.
Kara just gave a weak smile and closed the door before running around to the driver's side and hopping in. Then she hooked her phone up to the aux chord and started playing music. Lena recognized the melody and words from the radio, and she believed the artist was called Lauv.
The blonde set up her GPS and put her phone in a mount attached to the windshield of her car. Lena thought it was strange Kara would need a GPS to get to her own house, but she didn't comment on it as they pulled away from the curb. Then they were quiet for a few minutes, just listening to the music as Kara drove them onto the interstate.
When they started nearing the exit Lena always took to get home, Kara turned on her blinker and started to merge to take the exit.
"What are you doing?" Lena asked. "You live on the other side of the city."
Kara glanced at her briefly. "I thought I was bringing you home?"
"You are, but—" Lena gulped, suddenly feeling all the drinks she'd had as the bright lights along the interstate swam in her vision, "I thought we were going to your home."
Kara's grip on the steering wheel tightened ever so slightly. "Oh."
The brunette's heart sank when Kara didn't say anything else, and she was about to tell Kara to just forget it. But then Kara turned off her blinker, and instead of taking the exit for Lena's place, she sped right past it. After that Lena kept stealing glances at Kara, smiling in the dark of the car to herself.
When they got to Kara's the first thing the blonde did was got to the kitchen and get them a couple of bottles of water out of the fridge. Lena took it, even though she didn't want it, just to be polite. She sat on the couch and tried not to frown when Kara sat herself as far as possible on the other side.
But a frown did come when Kara announced, "I'll sleep here tonight," and patted the couch for emphasis.
Lena sighed and placed her unopened bottle of water on the coffee table. She scooted along the couch so that she was closer to Kara, so their thighs were touching. She placed a hand on Kara's knee, just like she'd done a week before, and looked at her pointedly.
"I'd rather you not," she said, her voice slightly deeper.
Kara took in a breath. "Lena…"
"Kara," Lena drawled, raising her eyebrows. She moved her hand from Kara's knee to her bicep, wrapping her fingers around it and digging in her nails slightly as she leaned closer to the other woman's face slowly. "You think I don't know what you're doing with these sleeveless shirts? Showing up at my trailer with a snack while looking like a snack?"
Their lips were mere centimeters apart, Lena's eyes fluttering closed as she anticipated a kiss. But when it didn't come, she opened her eyes again, and Kara had pulled her head back and was looking at her with sadness etched across her features.
"How much have you had to drink?" Kara asked in a quiet voice.
"What difference does it make?"
A sad smile tilted the corners of Kara's mouth. "It makes all the difference." She took Lena's hand from her bicep but didn't let it go. Instead she held Lena's hand in her own, gazing down at it. "When you were sober you were loud and clear about not wanting to pursue anything with me. Now that you're drunk you want me again, and even if it's only for a night, I can't in good conscience do this with you." She looked down at their hands, a tight frown on her face. "Not like this, not when I'm one hundred percent certain you wouldn't be doing this if you were sober. Even though I want to, I just can't do it. I'd feel like I was taking advantage of you."
Lena knew Kara's noble intentions should have made her feel better about the rejection, but her face still burned with embarrassment and shame. "Maybe you should just take me home, then, after all," she muttered, withdrawing her hand from Kara's.
"Lena—"
"Kara, it's fine," Lena said, standing. "I'll even get an Uber, instead, so I won't trouble you anymore."
"Lena, no," Kara said quickly, standing as well. "I want you to stay, I just—" She paused to sigh and run an agitated hand through her hair, "I don't want you to wake up tomorrow and realize the only reason you wanted to be with me was because you were drunk. Because it wouldn't be just that for me." She took Lena's hands again, both of them, holding them securely in her own as she gazed into worried green eyes. "Please stay. Let me feed you, drink some water, we'll get some sleep. And in the morning, we'll figure this all out." She gave a small, kind smile. "Okay?"
Lena nodded slowly, an unfamiliar warmth spreading through her chest. "Okay," she echoed.
"Thank you," the blonde said in a soft voice, hesitating for a moment before kissing Lena's forehead gently. When she pulled away, she nodded her head towards the back of the house. "Come on, let's get some food in you."
She made sure to grab Lena's bottle of water, handing it to her before leading her to the back of the house. Lena sat at the kitchen table and drank the bottle slowly as she watched Kara get a pan out from a cabinet. Then she went in the fridge and got out a package of sliced cheese and butter. Lena already knew what she intended to cook, even before Kara went into the pantry to get the bread.
"Grilled cheese, huh?" Lena asked with a smile.
Kara laughed. "Yeah. It's kind of my family's go-to food when we're drunk." She put the pan on the stove and turned on the burner. "When I was a kid and my parents would have parties, they always made grilled cheese afterwards. I never thought anything of it, just thought it was fun to have grilled cheese with my parents at midnight. Then when I got older and realized they were drunk, I just thought it was funny." She laughed a little as she took out a few slices of bread and spread butter on the back of two of them. "Eventually Alex started drinking, too, and then I did. Now every Christmas Eve we drink together and open presents, then make grilled cheeses before we go to bed. It's become one of my favorite traditions." She smirked, glancing at Lena before putting the first grilled cheese on the pan. "Besides me and Alex waiting for our parents to go to sleep so we can sneak outside and go smoke."
Lena laughed. "And then do you make more grilled cheeses because you have the munchies?" she asked, knowing her appetite instantly increased when she smoked.
"No, then we go inside and break into the cookies our mom bakes a day in advance to bring to our grandma's house the next day," Kara said with a grin, going into a drawer to grab a spatula. "Sometimes we play with our gifts. One year I got a PlayStation, and we played this superhero fighting game until our dad shuffled into the living room and told us to quiet down or go to sleep." She looked down shyly. "We may get a little competitive."
"I understand sibling rivalry," Lena said, frowning melancholily. "Lillian constantly pitted Lex and I against each other, always made sure I knew how much more accomplished Lex was in his career. Yet she was the one getting better roles for him." She laughed bitterly, crinkling the water bottle in her hands. "Joke's on her, because as soon as he got big enough, he ditched her. Now she's stuck with just me."
"She's not stuck with you," Kara said as she flipped over the grilled cheese, the first side a nice golden brown. "The way I see it, she's lucky to have you. You're just as talented—if not more talented—than Lex. You've built one hell of a name for yourself, even if your last name is Luthor. You could go out and get yourself a new agent tomorrow, and then your mom wouldn't know what to do with herself."
"You're right, I could," Lena agreed, actually smiling at the idea. "Her head would probably explode."
Kara laughed again as she took a plate down from a cabinet and put the finished sandwich on it. "So why don't you?" she asked, walking over and placing the plate on the table in front of Lena.
"Why don't I what?" Lena asked as she picked up the sandwich, thought she knew perfectly well what Kara meant.
"Fire your mom and get a new agent?" Kara questioned, going back over to the counter to prepare a sandwich for herself. "You could find someone who isn't as controlling, is supportive of you coming out, and helps you get better roles."
"So you agree Lillian is crap at picking out my parts?" Lena asked with a quirked eyebrow before taking a bite of the grilled cheese.
"I mean—" Kara hesitated, choosing her words carefully as she placed her sandwich in the pan, "Your roles thus far haven't been the worst, but they could definitely be better."
Lena swallowed before asking slowly, "How much of my work have you seen?"
Kara froze, her shoulders tensing as she admitted, "Almost everything, except the really obscure stuff I can't find online." She flipped her sandwich before listing, "Like Mad World, Lost Paradise, and a pilot for some show called West From Here."
A happiness filled Lena's chest at Kara's statement, and she felt humbled that Kara had been interested in her so much before they'd even met that she'd watched most of her work—even looked into the smaller roles she was sure hardly anyone knew anything about.
"It's a shame West From Here didn't get picked up," Lena said with a pout. "I really liked the character, and I thought the premise for the show was interesting."
"I would have loved to have seen it," Kara said, glancing at Lena over her shoulder.
"They gave us all a copy of the pilot episode on a DVD, at least," Lena commented, pausing to take a bite of her sandwich, chewing and swallowing before offering, "If you want to watch it sometime, I'm sure I can find it in my penthouse somewhere."
The blonde turned fully to look at her then, wide-eyed. "Really?"
Lena nodded. "Yeah, of course."
"That would be amazing," Kara gushed, her face slightly awed. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," Lena said with a small smile as Kara went back to cooking.
She was pretty sure she also had copies of the two movies Kara had mentioned somewhere too, but just in case she didn't, she didn't say anything. She would wait until she was sure she had them, then surprise Kara with all three DVDs at once. But she was still drunk and didn't want to forget, so she took her phone from her pocket and wrote a reminder in her notes as Kara sat down with her own plate.
"What's Christmas like at the Luthor house?" Kara questioned as she began to eat.
"Not nearly as fun as yours, I assure you," Lena said, her features darkening. "Now that Lex and our mother aren't on speaking terms, it's just me and Lillian on Christmas day. I fly out to Metropolis Christmas morning, go over for there for lunch, we sit at opposite ends of a huge table, the wait staff she refused to let have the day off fluttering around us. Then we sit around the tree in stuffy silence until she decides to speak up, usually choosing to criticize something—my clothes, my makeup, or lack of makeup. Then she gives me a gift, most often some tiny, designer dress I can barely fit my boobs into, let alone my ass. And then I give her whatever I've come up with for that year, and she stares at it disdainfully for a few moments before putting on a fake smile and hollowly thanking me." Lena popped the last of her sandwich into her mouth, chewed and swallowed, before finishing, "Then I get on the next plane back to National City, throw the dress in the back of my closet when I get home, and drink whatever alcohol I have lying around the apartment until I fall asleep."
Kara stared at her as she chewed a particularly large bite of her own sandwich. "I'm sorry," she said honestly, feeling guilty for having a wonderful family, even though it wasn't something she should have felt at fault over. "Was it at least better when you were a kid?"
"Not really. It was always kind of the same. We were never a particularly loving family, and since I was given countless toys and clothes throughout the year as a substitute for affection, opening presents wasn't even all that exciting for me," Lena said. Not to mention the only thing she'd ever truly wanted as a child was something that couldn't be wrapped up and placed under a tree—it wasn't even possible.
"Well," Kara said around another mouthful of sandwich, "I hope one day you have a family of your own and you can finally have a nice Christmas surrounded by people you love." She smiled briefly before finishing the grilled cheese, dusting the crumbs off her hands over the plate.
"Me too," Lena said, eyeing Kara for a second before ducking her head. Her food was starting to digest, and she could feel the alcohol losing some of its effects in the process.
Kara gave her a t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants to change into while the blonde cleaned up the kitchen. When she went into the bathroom to change, she noticed right away that the red toothbrush she'd used the weekend before was in the cup on the counter—right where she'd left it, next to Kara's blue one. She didn't know why Kara would have kept it, why she wouldn't have thrown it away if they'd agreed last time that they'd never sleep together again. But the sight of it made her heart start thumping frantically in her chest, and she had to splash water on her face to get her bearings because suddenly the world felt like it was spinning.
She used the towel hanging by the sink to dry her face, careful not to get any makeup on the it. Then she started the shower, because Kara had insisted she take one, that she would feel better after, and she had to admit that the woman was probably right. She'd simply changed before heading to the bar, and she could feel the layer of sweat on her skin as she shed her clothes and waited for the shower to warm.
Towels were found in a cabinet built into the wall, and Lena dropped one on the bathmat before climbing in when the water was warm enough to her liking. Afterwards she felt increasingly sober yet being fresh and clean from the shower was refreshing. Once she'd towel-dried her hair enough she slipped into the clothes Kara had given her—a fresh pair of underwear (these not boxer briefs, but still not the lacy garments she was used to), an old t-shirt advertising a band called Parachute on the front, and red and black checkered pajama pants.
When she emerged from the bathroom, teeth brushed, she saw that Kara had changed into a plain, grey v-neck shirt and black, cotton shorts. She smiled when she saw Lena standing there, hair damp and wetting the fabric of the light blue t-shirt. It sent her heart fluttering, the sight of the brunette in her clothes. She bit her lip and tried to shove down those familiar emotions, announcing she was going to brush her teeth.
Lena settled herself between the sheets of Kara's bed, enjoying the lingering smell of Kara that washed over her. She hadn't realized how much she missed it until she was surrounded by it again, and she buried her face in a pillow to breathe the scent in deeply, as if to memorize it. She didn't pick her head up again until she heard the bathroom door open, and a moment later Kara was back, standing in the doorway to her bedroom.
"Do you want me to sleep in here with you, or would you prefer I sleep on the couch?" Kara asked tentatively, fidgeting in the doorway, unsure of whether or not she should cross the threshold.
Lena stared at her for a moment in amazement. This woman had taken her to her house, even though she'd never originally planned to. She'd fed her, clothed her, and gave her a bed to sleep in. All after Lena had come onto her—only to be shot down, but for a noble reason. Yet she was still standing there asking Lena's permission to sleep in her own bed. Lena wasn't sure what planet Kara was from, but she was almost certain it wasn't Earth, because there was no way anyone could be that nice and actually be human.
It was almost like Kara was a figment of her imagination, like she'd dreamed up the perfect woman and Kara appeared. Yet there she was, standing before in—flesh and blood, and oh so real.
"I'd like for you to sleep in here with me," Lena said in a small voice.
Kara nodded. "Okay. I'll be right back."
She disappeared into the hallway again, and Lena was curious where she was going for a moment until she heard Kara rummaging around in the kitchen. When the blonde returned, she had two new bottles of water and handed one to Lena as she crawled into bed next to her. Lena gratefully took it, unscrewing the cap and taking a sip as Kara went into the drawer in her nightstand and took out two pill bottles.
Lena tried not to appear too interested as Kara took a pill from each, tossing them into her mouth before taking a sip of water and downing them, then putting the water on the nightstand and the pill bottles back in the drawer. When she turned back to Lena, though, she caught a curious glance.
"My anxiety medicine," Kara explained, jutting her thumb towards the drawer.
"You don't have to explain it," Lena said quickly. "I just didn't see you take anything last time, so I was curious."
"Last time I waited until you were in the bathroom to take it," Kara said with a shrug. "I'm not ashamed that I take it, I just don't really like to advertise it right away. Most people don't get it, think I must be really messed up if I'm medicated." She shook her head, letting out a deep sigh. "The irony is that I'm not messed up because I am medicated. And in therapy."
Lena was taken aback that Kara was admitting this to her, as on her side of the industry people taking medication and going to any kind of mental health treatment was usually treated with a hush-hush attitude. But Kara spoke about it so casually, it was if she was discussing her dentist rather than a mental health professional.
"Does it help?" the brunette questioned, glancing sideways at Kara again. "The therapy, I mean."
"Yeah," Kara said, nodding. "I think I've benefited immensely from it. If I look at where I was when I first started versus where I am now—both in my life and in regard to how I manage my anxiety—I have grown exponentially since then."
"Maybe I should try therapy," Lena joked, giving a dry laugh.
"You're laughing, but have you ever thought that maybe that's a good idea?" Kara asked, raising her eyebrows.
"I—What—" Lena shook her head quickly. "I can't go to therapy. I can't just go around telling someone about all my dirty laundry. Who knows what they'll say to the press?"
"Lena, you know therapy is confidential, right?"
"It's what, now?"
"Confidential." Kara laughed, the sound vibrating off the walls. "Legally they can't tell anyone anything you tell them unless you're a danger to yourself or someone else. It's against the law. If they did, they could lose their license."
Lena gasped. "Lillian lied to me."
Lena had asked to go to therapy once, when she was a teenager. Lillian was threatening to send her to conversion therapy at the time, promising to tell the press she'd been on vacation at a private villa in Mexico all summer rather than the truth. Lena tried to bargain with her, pleaded to send her to regular therapy instead, as she was a minor and still needed Lillian's permission. Of course her mother refused, using her image as an excuse, claiming if the paparazzi got shots of her coming in and out of a therapist's office it would make her look bad. And that her therapist was bound to go with everything she told them to the press, and then casting directors wouldn't hire her if they thought she was crazy.
It was the time before smart phones were wildly popular, and she hadn't switched over from her blackberry yet, not quite ready to give up having a keyboard on her phone. She didn't think to look it up then. And then she never considered it again or looked into getting a therapist once she came of age, so she never had the chance to discover the invalidity of Lillian's statement.
"Yeah, that sounds like something you should unpack in therapy," Kara said, patting Lena's shoulder gently. "Seriously, it may seem weird at first, opening up about your deepest and darkest fears to a complete stranger, but that's what they're there for. To help you get past them and make those fears seem less scary."
Lena looked down at the hand on her shoulder briefly, then back to those kind, earnest blue eyes. "I'll think about it."
"Good." Kara squeezed her shoulder before letting go, dropping her hand to her lap. "Sleep on it, yeah?" she asked, reaching over to switch off the light on her bedside table.
The blonde settled herself between the sheets comfortably, her warmth radiating from her body. The bed wasn't big, but Kara still managed to allow Lena plenty of space—too much space. She didn't often share a bed with people overnight, but when she did, she liked to be allowed her own section of the bed, hating if the other person had the nerve to cross over into her territory. Cuddling was out of the question, and if they so much as breathed too much in her vicinity she was annoyed. Yet now she just wanted to feel Kara's arms around her, to be nestled into the side of her body and feel the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed.
She settled for scooting closer and taking Kara's hand, lacing their fingers together, and tucking her head into Kara's shoulder. She felt the blonde tense ever so slightly before recovering, seeming to ease into the touch as she let out a deep sigh.
"Is this okay?" Lena asked, her voice timid yet tinged with sleep.
"Perfect," Kara whispered, kissing the crown of Lena's head.
Lena smiled as her eyes closed, and she returned Kara's goodnight kiss with one of her own to the blonde's shoulder. And as she drifted off to sleep, she wasn't worried about the inevitable discussion they'd be having about why Lena was back after claiming their having sex had been a one-night thing, wasn't dreading what the conversation could possibly lead to. All she cared about was how good and solid Kara's body felt next to her own and how perfectly her head fit into the curve of her neck.
Happy Crisis.