Chapter 21 Completion
Avalon looks down at Sesshomaru as Jaken clings desperately to his mokomoko. Her eyes spark with excitement. She wasn't scared of the rapid descent. It was exhilarating. "Can we do that again?" She beams down at him.
He flies higher into the sky without speaking, until they are above the clouds and the air is thinner. This time, he rolls in circles, throwing her off balance and then drops her by herself while Jaken screams as Sesshomaru dashes after her.
Avalon eyes widen slightly, in fear that Sesshomaru intends to kill her. She screams with fear as she spreads her arms out to slow her falling as much as possible while hoping water might be below her. She closes her eyes, praying he saves her.
He catches her around the waist, pressing his stomach into her back, then brings them up into a steep incline while burying his nose into her neck. He spins as they climb in altitude, then stops, holding her vertically. He motions with his head below, wondering if she wants another go.
"Don't you dare drop me again," she hisses as her fingers cling to his arm leaving indents.
"Mmh," he leans next to her ear, whispering seductively, "wrap your legs around my waist."
Avalon lifts her eyebrow but does as he asks, wrapping her legs around his waist.
He lets gravity take them again as he holds her around the waist.
Avalon smiles feeling the air rush by and her stomach rises as they plunge towards the ground. Her legs hold him firmly using her strong muscles. "This is great!"
He stops their descent in time for the spray of the river to splash them as the rapids rush passed jagged rocks. Behind, Jaken flaps weakly against Sesshomaru's mokomoko, looking greener than usual. "No more Sesshomaru-sama...please!"
He ignores the imps whines, purposely flying with Avalon beneath him, her legs tightly wrapped around his waist. He wonders how much of what is going on in his hakama she feels. He leans his mouth closer to hers, inviting her to kiss him.
Avalon can feel the large bulge between her legs but she is enjoying the ride so much she is choosing to ignore it. She brushes her lips with his as she wraps her hands around his neck, using her back muscles to be parallel to him.
He opens his mouth wider against hers, encouraging her to do the same. He keeps an eye on the river as they fly slowly, ignoring Jaken's protests from behind him. His hand dips lower, pushing her thighs more tightly into his hips. His bulge digs into her core, aching for release.
Avalon breaks the kiss and lets her back sink backwards. "Sesshomaru?" she says forlornly, looking away from him.
"One day," he whispers in her ears, bringing them vertical again and helps her manoeuvre back to his side, "you will not fear my touch." His eyes focus forward as he hastens their speed. He doesn't know if Naraku knows Avalon is not dead or if Hikari is already in his grasp. He flies until the wind whips against them and he sees spots in his vision.
Avalon closes her eyes and leans into his chest protecting her face from the wind as she holds onto him. She shakes her head sadly. 'I don't fear your touch, Sesshomaru. I wish you could understand.'
Sesshomaru soars over the village, landing in front of the hut Hikari lives in. It's night by the time they arrive. Sesshomaru releases Avalon and she rushes into the hut. "Hikari!" Avalon's voice trembles with joy.
Her entrance wakes a baby that is sleeping on the floor and one of the other children. They both start crying. Hikari rushes to pick up the baby and kneels over the toddler shushing him. "Good job Avalon," she narrows her eyes at her and refuses to say more.
Sesshomaru remains outside of the hut. "Better to not get involved," Jaken says as if he is reading Sesshomaru's mind.
Avalon lowers her voice. She walks over to the toddler. "More orphans?" she says sadly.
"I think they're brothers, not that family means anything to you." She rocks the baby against her shoulder and picks up a horn and a bladder of goat milk for the baby. "Kaede-sama found them in the woods. Their parents are dead. Not that you care. Why are you here?"
"I'm here for you. I've missed you terribly."
"Liar," she plops down indian style to feed the baby. "Come on, open your mouth." The baby fought the horn in its mouth. "He does this every time."
"Allow me to try?" Avalon opens her arms for the baby.
"You don't have milk in your breasts, what are you going to do?" Hikari rolls her eyes. "You need to eat akanbo (baby). He doesn't have a name."
"I wasn't going to breastfeed him Hikari." Avalon shakes her head. "But I have fed a baby before."
Hikari hands the baby over exasperated. "Fine. Then you can leave."
Avalon holds the baby against her chest allowing the infant to rest on her breast. The baby starts nudging into her kimono trying to get to her breast. "The milk please?" Avalon holds out her hand.
Hikari hands her the horn and runs out of the hut to find Sesshomaru leaning against a tree. "I knew it…" she removes the blade he gave her and throws it at his heart.
He catches it in hand just before it pierces his chest, then tosses it on the ground in front of her feet. Hikari screams and attacks him.
Avalon rushes out of the hut with the baby in her arms, hearing Hikari's scream. She sees Hikari leaping at Sesshomaru. Avalon shakes her head and turns back into the hut grabbing the milk and then heads outside again to watch.
She smirks at Sesshomaru, while holding the baby like she is breastfeeding but using the horn for the infant to suck on. 'I need to ask Kagome for a few baby bottles.'
Hikari grabs the knife off the ground and twirls, trying to strike Sesshomaru in the neck. He slaps her wrist down as she tries to kick him in his groin. "You made her your whore!" she screams at him. "Is that why she didn't come back!?"
He loses his patience with the girl's game and slaps her across the face hard enough to knock her down and pins her down with his knee.
"Let me go!"
Avalon screams, "Let her go Sesshomaru. She doesn't know!" She runs with the baby in her hands to get to Hikari. Just then Inuyasha leaps onto the scene. He sees Sesshomaru pinning Hikari and a human woman with a baby rushing at Sesshomaru.
Inuyasha jumps in front of Avalon. Drawing his sword, he points it at Sesshomaru. "Let her go, Sesshomaru!"
Avalon drops the horn and summons her blade ready to take action if need be. She moves the baby to her hip as she holds the sword. "Inuyasha back down now!"
Sesshomaru snorts in discontent at Inuyasha. "Always troubling yourself where you don't belong." He lashes out with his whip, keeping Hikari pinned down as Inuyasha is forced to dodge the attack. "Were you called a whore for what was done to you?" he snarls at Hikari.
"You didn't rape her!" She struggles against him. "Let me go!"
"Inuyasha you should leave." Avalon's tone is even, "Sesshomaru you need to back down."
Inuyashsa turns to look at the woman he thought was no more than a mother fighting for her children. "I'm not going anywhere. Are you crazy? He's a killer and how do you know his name?"
"Inuyasha you are making things worse. I can't deal with both of you." Avalon pushes past Inuyasha, turning her back on him. "Sesshomaru, this isn't helping."
"Silence!" he bellows at Avalon. "You will close your mouth," he says to Hikari on the verge of wanting to kill her. "You know nothing."
"I know you're an evil jerk! And she's a whore!" She pushes against his knee, unable to move him.
Avalon watches as things go from bad to worse. "Please don't harm her Sesshomaru! She doesn't know and I love her!"
Inuyasha grabs Avalon's shoulder and pushes her out of the way. "You hear that you bastard. She loves the kid." He points his sword at him. "You're not welcome here. I'll kill you if you harm that girl."
Avalon uses her body to keep the baby safe. She runs to put the crying baby back in the hut and then rushes back out.
"No you don't!" Hikari screams, her cheeks stained with tears. "You left me just to have sex with him!" She throws a punch at his side that jars her wrist and makes her cry in pain.
Avalon cries as she rushes past Inuyasha again. "That's not what happened Hikari. I never had sex with Sesshomaru."
Inuyasha's ears pull back against his head. He did not want to hear about having sex with his half-brother.
"Then why are you with him? Get off of me!" She scratches at his knee with the wrist that doesn't hurt. Jaken Jr. runs out of the hut and bites on Sesshomaru's feet. He slaps the puppy off, making it whine. "No!" Hikari cries.
"Hikari, stop fighting and listen! It's the only way! I can't overpower Sesshomaru and Inuyasha shouldn't try. It's a big mess and we don't have time for it. Please, listen to me for once."
Sesshomaru leans over Hikari. "You are not worth the protection of this Sesshomaru. I should let him have you." He grabs Hikari by the wrist, about to hover in the air.
"SESSHOMARU RELEASE HER," Avalon calls her sword, ready to strike. "I will not hold back trying to stop you." Avalon's eyes alight with reiki. She grinds her teeth. "I DIDN'T ENDURE MONTHS OF TORTURE TO LET SOMETHING HAPPEN TO HER NOW!"
Inuyasha backs up feeling the crackle of reiki flowing in the air. His sword reverts back to the rusty dull blade. He looks down at it confused.
Sesshomaru throws Hikari onto the ground face first, cutting her lip and rushes Inuyasha with his arm extended, mysting green.
Avalon's anger drops and she rushes to Hikari to check on her.
Inuyasha dodges Sesshomaru's attack just barely before turning around to face Sesshomaru. "I told you, if you hurt the girl, I'd kill you!" He charges Sesshomaru recklessly.
Hikari waits until Avalon is close enough, then grabs a rock, slamming it into her head, making her bleed. "Liar! Everything you said is a lie!"
Avalon brings a hand up to her head where Hikari stuck her. The blood flow slows, then stops as she holds her head as the wound closes. Avalon is stunned that her wound healed so quickly. She backs up, feeling slightly betrayed by the young lady she thinks of as a sister. Avalon calls gently, "I'm not lying."
Sesshomaru slams his whip against Inuyasha's face, sending the hanyou flying, landing on his clawed feet.
Inuyasha slides backwards then leaps again at Sesshomaru.
Sesshomaru and Inuyasha continue battling behind them, taunting each other.
"Then where were you!" Hikari stands up, still holding the rock in her hand.
"I was held captive Hikari. That yokai I feared so much, he found me." Avalon cries. "He threatened to hurt you if I didn't do what he said. I couldn't leave until now. I'm so scared for you Hikari."
Hikari's eyes widen and she drops the rock, blinking back her sorrow. "What did he make you do?" A part of her doesn't need to ask. She already knows.
"Hikari I don't want to..." Her lips tremble. "I'm so ashamed. It was horrible but I did it to protect you." Avalon's head and shoulders slump.
Shewalks weakly to Avalon and hugs her around the shoulders. "Onesan."
Avalon wraps her arms around Hikari crying into her shoulder. "I'm so sorry." She unwraps her arms and gets up to look over at the two inu-youkai fighting and calls, "Hey Inuyasha! Where is Kagome?"
Inuyasha's head snaps over to Avalon just ducking a blow from Sesshomaru. "If she's in the future. She might need your help."
"What?" Inuyasha is stunned by what this strange woman is saying, leaving himself open.
Sesshomaru slams his claws satisfyingly into Inuyasha's middle.
Avalon rushes over to them. She places herself in front of Inuyasha. "Sesshomaru that's enough. We didn't come here to fight your brother." She puts up a barrier around herself and Inuyasha. Avalon looks over at Inuyasha and sees him getting up. She places her hand on his stomach, glad to see that it wasn't as bad as it looked. "That was a cheap shot. I was distracting him."
"I've never considered this hanyou my brother. Back away," he growls at Avalon coming in for another blow.
"Ummmmm...no." Avalon changes the dimensions of the barrier encircling her and Sesshomaru. "You better go Inuyasha, Kagome needs you."
Inuyasha nods his head. "Right." He leaps off and away. Avalon stands her ground looking at him innocently.
"That was not submission." He plods away from her, heading for the forest, equally annoyed and aroused by her stubbornness.
Avalon shrugs her shoulders and follows him into the forest. "Sesshomaru you wouldn't talk, so I had to take action." She leaps around, fluttering about him.
"Leave me," he says firmly, furious with her disrespect. His shoulder flares, sending him to his knees in pain from his missing arm. He pants gripping it tightly, bearing his teeth.
"Sesshomaru!" Avalon rushes over to him looking about for more of the herbs she knows that helps.
"I said leave me!" he bellows at her threateningly, leaning against a tree for stability.
"Sesshomaru." She says softly not sure what to do. She stops her movements and looks down. "I'm sorry."
He uses the trunk as leverage to force himself off the ground, panting heavily from the pain. "Get out of my sight," he says as he slides back down the trunk, unable to escape the stabbing pain in his stump.
Avalon's eyes tear up as she runs from him. She runs back towards the hut where Hikari is. 'Why did he have to be such a stubborn ass?'
Sesshomaru makes his way deeper into the forest, finding a tree to rest under, while the waves of pain rack his body. 'I will not whine like a dog,' he tells himself as it eats away at his consciousness.
Avalon rubs her eyes clearing the tears away. 'He needs me whether he wants it or not.' She gets out of the hut and starts looking for the herbs that help. She finds them in the garden and picks some stuffing them in her sleeve. She returns to where she last saw him. Looking around for him and screams, "YOU STUBBORN JERK!" She walks deeper in looking for him.
He's in too much pain to move, even breathing hurts. 'A few more days,' he tells himself firmly, trying to push the pain from his mind. He grips the stump with his palm, attempting to massage the pain away. The bandages have come loose. He writhes on the forest floor, his face red and his skin hot again.
Avalon hears the rustling in the forest and follows the sound. She finds him on the ground. "Sesshomaru!" She rushes to him and pushes on the stump with one hand while digging the herbs out. "Here take these." She pushes them to his clenched teeth.
He can't open his mouth, the pain radiates from the stump into his jaw. He can smell her. She smells like comfort, but the world is fading in and out of focus.
Avalon purses her lips as his teeth stay locked. She takes the herbs in her mouth chewing them then she places her lips over his letting the juice drip through his clenched teeth. She holds down on the stump trying to ease the pain as best she can. 'Maybe next time you will accept my help before you are a mess.'
The familiar bitter liquid drips into his throat. He swallows it, reaching a shaking hand out for her. He can feel the pressure on the stump, easing the pain. "Where are...you?" he mutters out weakly, the fever taking him. It was too soon to battle again.
Avalon leans her body on him giving him as much contact as she can while chewing more of the herbs. She brings her lips to his and allows the liquid to flow between them, before spitting the leaves out. "I'm right here Sesshomaru. I'm right here."
Hikari comes out from the bushes, her eyes wide in shock. She can see Sesshomaru shaking, nearly convulsing and Avalon wrapped around him, while he clings to her. "What's wrong with him?" Hikari runs up with Jaken Jr. trailing behind her. The puppy is all gangly legs now.
He reaches out with his arm for Avalon and digs his nose into her skin. 'I can smell you.' Her scent is like an anesthetic to the pain. "Stay," he forces the word out through chattering teeth.
"I'm here." Avalon says, still holding him tightly. "It's a long story, Hikarki."
Hikari starts rolling up the empty sleeve, her eyes bulging, seeing what Avalon is gripping. "What happened? Where's his arm? These bandages are loose." She tugs them off completely. "And tattered...should I get new ones? I can bring new ones."
"Umm...Inuyasha took his arm and yes new bandages would be great."
"Why is he holding you?" Hikari asks suspiciously. "I thought you said you wouldn't seek him out again?"
"Avalon," the name nearly comes out as a whimper from Sesshomaru's lips.
Avalon's head dips down to lay against him. "I didn't seek him out, Hikari. I nearly killed him and he nearly killed me. Well, let's say we both owe each other our lives. The bandages?"
Hikari nods, running off into the forest, back to the hut.
Sesshomaru swallows harshly, trying to get ahead of the pain. Rest, he needs to rest, but he can barely speak. He pulls himself tighter into her body, sweating, his temperature rising.
Avalon can feel his body temperature rising. 'Shit'. She releases his stump to reach into her sleeve for more of the herb. Bringing it to her lips, she chews it up. She maneuvers her lips to his to allow the liquid to pass into his mouth and places her hand back on the stump putting pressure on it. She spits the rest of the leaf pulp out.
Hikari comes back with the baby tied to her front and a wad of bandages in her hands. She gives them to Avalon and asks, "What can I do? He's still a jerk..."
"Yeah, I can't argue that." Avalon grabs the bandages, extracting herself from Sesshomaru to tie them around his stump. "Water and a fire would be good. He has a fever."
"I can get that. Why is he like this?" Hikari reaches out to touch his brow only for Sesshomaru to lash out, swiping his claws at her. She cringes, waiting for the blow to fall.
Avalon instantly erects a barrier between his claws and Hikari. "Hikari, he is a youkai, do not be foolish enough to approach when one is injured. He seeks me out because he knows my scent well and it brings him comfort. I'm sorry he lashed out at you. Please grab what I asked for?"
She nods and leaves, running back to her home with her dog following her.
Sesshomaru reaches out for Avalon again, searching for her blindly in the haze of his fever. "Avalon," he tries to pull himself closer to her, but can't.
Avalon lowers her body to cover him. Giving him as much contact as she can. "I'm here, I'm here," she cooes to him while running her fingers through his hair.
His nose instinctively works it's way into her neck, puffing air against her skin. He grips her back with his arm and stutters out, "t...tired…"
Avalon bites her bottom lip. She forces Reiki into her limbs, giving her strength to lift him. She extracts herself from his hold and leans over, picking him up bridal style to carry him back to the village. 'It's safer in the village. I can keep an eye on Hikari too.'
Avalon walks to Hikari's hut and gently places him on the side. She doesn't want to bring him inside in case he lashes out at the children or Hikari. She lays down in front of Sesshomaru, scooching back to allow him to grab her and bring her close to his chest and stomach. "Sleep Sesshomaru. I'll keep us safe."
"Onna!" Jaken comes running. "What did you do to him!?"
"Quiet Jaken-sama," Hikari leaves the hut with a hot kettle and a flint stone. "Avalon?" She sets them down feet away from where Avalon is lying, entangled in Sesshomaru's grip to avoid getting hit by him again. Her eyes start to tear up. "You left me to go back to him." She covers her eyes sobbing.
"You made him overexert himself with that ridiculous flying!" Jaken joins the sobbing.
Sesshomaru's hand moves to cover one of his ears, attempting to hide his face in Avalon's neck again. 'Cantelope, Honeydew,' he knows he is safe. 'Scent,' he thinks weakly, barely able to stay awake.
"Quiet Jaken," Avalon hisses. "He overexerted himself fighting with his brother." Avalon shakes her head. "Hikari I did not leave you to go to Sesshomaru. I have never lied to you." Her head sinks to the ground. "I need to be close to protect both of you. I don't know how long until that youkai will come looking for me or you and I wasn't going to be laying in the forest with him while something happens to you."
"No, you're just laying with him!" Hikari's eyes narrow and she inches forward cautiously. "You got married didn't you? Are you pregnant? Why him?"
Avalon sighs. "Not married, bonded. Not pregnant, never had sex with him. It wasn't a choice, Hikari. I was dying and he saved my life but he bonded himself to me accidentally. AHHHHH!"
"Because you tried to kill him!" Jaken lashes out at Avalon verbally. "This is what you wanted all along! Onna!"
Sesshomaru's hand flies out again, sending the whip flying around them.
Hikari squeaks running out of the way. Jaken flings himself onto the ground as it circles blindly in the air. "T...tired," Sesshomaru grits out between his teeth, striking blindly with the whip.
Avalon puts a barrier around them to contain his lashing out. "Will you be quiet, you toad? And it's Avalon-sama to you," she hisses. "It's safe Hikari. He won't be able to strike out of the barrier."
"Maybe we should let him rest," Hikari offers and goes to Jaken. "Want to come inside?"
He grumbles and follows.
Sesshomaru breathes in the quiet, his arm slowly returning to wrap around Avalon's waist. "Avalon," he whispers, his lips brushing against her neck. "Stay."
Avalon shakes her head at him. 'You are too much Sesshomaru.' She whispers, "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere, go to sleep." Avalon plans to stay up all night keeping watch so he can rest but she accidently falls asleep.
She wakes up as the sun rises and rays creep into her eyes. She squeezes her eyes shut tighter then opens them blinking and goes to stretch her back, then feels an arm around her stomach, noticing the warmth and the steady rise and fall of a chest behind her.
Fear grips her. The arm tightens and a voice whispers next to her ear, "Shh. You're safe." He rubs her back to soothe her. He groans, not recognizing his surroundings. "What happened?"
Avalon relaxes, his voice isn't her captor's. She turns her head around to look at him. "Sesshomaru, you were in pain and I moved you over here, so I could keep an eye on you and Hikari."
He breathes heavily touching her stomach and dipping his nose into her neck again. The yearning is stronger. His need. "You're scared." He opens his eyes, squinting from the sun. "Nightmares?"
"I was scared but not from a nightmare. I didn't realize it was you holding me. I feared it was him," her voice trails off.
His teeth graze against her neck, then pull back abruptly. He brings himself off her chest feeling hard and heavy all at once. He leans against the hut next to her, resting his head against her shoulder. 'This must be so difficult for her.'
"Ah." Avalon's head lays down. "I'm sorry." Her heart hurts. She hates how messed up her head is.
His middle finger traces opulent circles around her waist, up to her ribs and then down her hips. His lips press into her neck again. The waiting is becoming too difficult and he worries the contact will drive her to fear. "Are you still scared?" His lips brush against the skin of her neck as he speaks.
Avalon answers as honestly as she can, "I'm not scared of you."
He threads his hand into her hair, claws raking down the black strands, to the bottom where they dangle down to her knees. They tingle against her scalp, combing her hair smooth. He shifts his hips, trying to force himself back down. This is torment.
Avalon relaxes into his touch leaning back against him. She turns her head as his hand smooths her hair along her back. She turns her entire body to let her head rest on his shoulder and her hand to rest over his side. Her breath ghosts over his chin and neck.
He glances down at her, tilting his head. His knuckles brush up her neck, then along her chin. "We will leave today," he says, leaning closer to her lips.
"Alright. I just need to talk to Kaede to let her know that I'm taking Hikari."
He nods, running his nose seductively over her lips, her nose, circling her eyes and breathing her scent in. "Cantaloupe and Honeydew," he mutters.
Avalon blinks. 'Is he hungry for melons?' She is very confused. "Are you hungry?"
His eyes fill with fire, but are lined in stress and exhaustion. "I hunger for what I can't have." He traces her collar bone with the pads of his fingers.
Avalon's right hand catches his. She watches his face closely and moves slowly to brush her lips against Sesshomaru's.
He responds, threading his fingers through her hair by the base of her neck, drinking from her lips. The kiss lingers until his hand lowers and he pulls back. "It should end with that," he pants, trying to free himself of her, sitting up. Any more and he wouldn't be able to stop. He forces his eyes shut risking the subject. "I wouldn't cause pain."
Avalon is confused by his sudden want to leave. Her desire for him is raging within her. She keeps her body resting against his. "What pain?"
"Here," he rests his hand at the material just above the apex of her womanhood, breathing heavily. He shakes his head to clear it. "I need release." Spending an entire night in her arms has sent his need from manageable to throbbing.
Avalon becomes slightly indignant. "So do I."
He closes his eyes, grateful at her admission. He stands up, holding out his hand for her to take.
Avalon reaches her hand out to him, letting him lift her.
He pulls her to his side, holding her tightly, then flies vertically into the air, hovering over the forest and the hut. "Did you have a dream?...What did you want for the first time?" His heart is racing as he searches for a more secluded area to take them.
"I always pictured it would be after the wedding." She chuckles dryly
He sees a field with lush grass and high camaphor trees in the distance, far enough from the village to give them privacy, but close enough he will be able to hear the hut. He sets her down, releasing her roughly, then backs away pacing, furiously. The ache is nearly as bad as the fever that overtook him the night before. "You must be ready." He is losing control. He tries to focus on the gait of his steps, not on Avalon.
"I am not sure if I'm ready. But I am ready to try," Avalon says just above a whisper. As she watches him pace, she wonders if he might turn on her. Slight fear rises at his agitated state.
He nods his head turning his back to breathe deeply. "You will tell me to stop...make a barrier, if it becomes too much. With this you will submit to this Sesshomuaru." He begins untying his obi to free his haori.
Avalon crosses her arms. "Stop saying submit. It only agitates me."
"Then learn to practice humility. You will promise to protect yourself. I am...not myself." He drops his haori on the ground and removes his underlayer.
Avalon uncrosses her arms. "I would have done it without you commanding me. I don't want you hurting me," she adds in a gentler voice, "and I don't think you want to hurt me."
"Stubborn onna, you will have none of me, until you make this promise humbly. You don't understand...the way this rages." He drops his hakama and kicks his shoes off, still refusing to face her.
Avalon walks over to him and wraps her arms around his naked back and whispers in his ear, "I promise to protect myself from you, if I am endangered by you." She dips her head to kiss along his neck.
He loosens himself from her embrace, trying to douse the agitated flames within him. "Not like this." He lays down on his back and closes his eyes. "You may explore this Sesshomaru and I will not touch you until you are ready. Remove your clothes."
Avalon nods her head and starts undoing her obi, letting it drop. Then she pulls the ties on her kimono and slides it off herself. She pulls the ties for her juban but stops. She lets her hands linger on the ties of the juban, nervous and excited by what she is about to do. Fear pokes at the back of her mind. 'Can I do this without freaking out? I'm with Sesshomaru not Naraku. I'll leave it on.' She lets her hands drop from the ties.
He cracks an eye open wanting to peek at her beauty. "This Sesshomaru will see your beauty." But then he smells the nerves behind the excitement he senses from her. 'The fear of a virgin.' He relaxes onto his side and tells her, "Remove the Juban."
"I thought your eyes were closed?" 'Please don't make me tell you why I want it on. It's so embarrassing, I just don't want to panic.'
"Are you embarrassed?" He sits up, running a hand up her calf to the dip in the back of her knee, examining the muscles in her legs. Even that mild action was making him harder. "Why hide?"
"If you want it off so bad, you take it off."
He smirks and slices through the material, tearing it off her shoulders.
She gasps and steps back a step. Her heartbeat increases slightly as she fears she might start panicking being bare before him.
"What is this?" his voice rasps as he speaks. He sits up abruptly, finding a scar that runs the length of her collarbone down to her pelvic area. He had forgotten about seeing it the day she nearly killed him. "It was not on your body before." And then his eyes search hers, hearing the rapid rate of her heart, the spike of her fear in her scent and the small tremble of her fingers. "When did this happen?"
Avalon gulps looking away, shame and fear gripping her. "When...when...he…" she swallows thickly "It's not important," she whispers.
He presses his nose into her stomach breathing heavily with arousal and concern. He holds the small of her back, kissing the scar tenderly from the bottom near her curls up to her navel, then glances up at her again. "He did this to you?" He can't tear his eyes away from it. "This is Naraku's mark."
Avalon's lip trembles, unable to form words, but she nods once as a single tear falls from her right eye.
His fingers spread out over her stomach, tracing the line with his thumb. "Let me take it off." He kisses the line lower, stopping at her pelvis. "I will remove his mark from you."
"You...can do that?" she asks with a hint of hope in her voice.
He stands up, twining his fingers into her hair, bringing her lips to his. "It will hurt. I will open it, our bond will seal it without leaving a scar." He nuzzles her nose, taking in her breath. "It will hurt," he warns her again, not wanting to cause her more pain that she has already experienced.
"I don't care about physical pain." She kisses his lips, trembling slightly. "Please," she whispers against his lips nearly begging for the scar to be removed. It was a constant physical reminder of her imprisonment.
He nods and brings the tip of his claw up to her neck where it begins. He positions his left side against her body, wishing he had his other arm to hold her. "I'm sorry," he says, digging it into her skin, tracing the track of the scar, while leaning his left side into her body. He follows the line down between her breasts, constantly glancing at her eyes.
A small smiling graces her lips as he cuts along the scar. She holds his shoulders and shakes but she doesn't move or back away. 'One less thing to remember him by.'
Sesshomaru follows the line as it curves around her stomach and stops at her pelvis. "Trust me," he croons in her ear, his mouth covers the injury and he traces the line again, this time dipping his tongue into the battered flesh to soothe the pain and speed the healing. He slides his fingers down her bare back and then kneels, pulling her abdomen tighter into his mouth as he spends more time on the base of the injury. "You will heal like this Sesshomaru now. No more scars." He pecks her navel, searching her eyes. "Do not fear me, this between us. I can taste it on your skin. You're afraid."
"I don't fear you," she says honestly. 'I'm just afraid I'll panic.' Avalon eyes drift to her scar the skin pulls together, first angry red, then deep pink, fading to light pink and finally nothing but smooth skin. Avalon's breath hitches. "Thank you," she says with awe, gratitude, and wonder.
Sesshomaru rises and kisses her tenderly again. "What do you fear?" He could taste it on her tongue, the roof of her mouth and the tender skin of her lips. "I will be gentle." 'Did he hurt her? Did he make her cry in pain?'
"It's nothing," she says quickly and dismissively.
He rests his forehead against hers, accepting her lie. "Do you want me to lie down again?" He traces the curve of her jaw, the shell of her ear and kisses her deeply, burying his tongue in her cavern, tasting her mouth fully. 'I should have searched for you.'
"Hai, if you want," she says nervously.
"It is not what this Sesshomaru wants," he says huskily and quietly. "It is what you want, Avalon."
"Please lay down?" she asks in a whisper as her heart rate increases with fear.
He nods, breathing slowly. He brings her knuckles up to his mouth, gingerly holding them against his mouth. "You may ask to stop. It doesn't matter when, Avalon," he says her name as if he is speaking of holiness. "I will stop."
"Alright," she says. "I want to keep going for now," she says looking him in the eyes, taking deep and steady breaths to calm herself.
He lays down on the tall grass as a gust of wind blows past them, tossing her hair in the wind, making her more beautiful than she already was. "You are beautiful," he gazes at her in adoration, wondering where the warm feelings in his heart were coming from. "Turn," he screws his cheeks tight to keep from smiling. "I want to see all of you."
Avalon breathes a sigh and then turns with her hands out, slowly letting him see her naked form. She stops once she is facing him again. She says gently, "Happy?"
"Very happy," he echoes her tone. "Female Inu-youkai are tender… soft." He runs his hand up her calf again, daring to go higher to her hips, just below her bottom, wondering what her ass felt like. She was contoured, sculpted. "Not firm, like this." He smiles laying onto his back, closing his eyes. "A beauty deserving of this Sesshomaru."
Avalon smiles at his compliment. She sits next to him and takes a finger to his forehead, tracing the moon, marveling at the smooth texture knowing he was born with it. Her hand moves along his nose and along his cheek. She smooths the pad of her finger over his lips. "Is it okay, that I'm touching you like this now?"
He nods, then cups her face. "I do not lie." His thumb traces the circles under her eyes. "I will give you what you should have had. I…" he stops short of admitting the guilt that is still eating at him and the discomfort, knowing pain was all she had ever experienced sexually. "Continue," he whispers, barely audible.
Avalon runs her hand down his neck and leans down to sniff along it. "You know you smell like fresh rain to me?"
"Cantaloupe, cream and Honeydew." He digs his claws into the grass to keep from touching her. His chest rises and falls heavily, accentuating the notches of his abs.
Avalon turns and sniffs her shoulder shrugging, she couldn't smell it. She brings her hands down along his chest and abs, feeling the thick muscles under the skin. She hesitates momentarily before she wraps her hand around his member, feeling the firm texture under the silky skin. Her breath becomes shallow and rapid. 'I'm okay. I'm okay.' Slight fear and excitement come through. 'I'm doing this because I want to.' She experiments with running her hand up the shaft and down again. She pumps him a few more times, marveling at the way his abs tense each time with her strokes.
Her hand made his back tighten, his nerves feel like they were on fire. "Good." He breathes faster, digging holes in the ground with his claws. He wants to touch her, to taste her skin, but she is still fearful and he knew it.
She leans over to brush her lips along his abs, experimenting with kissing him elsewhere in a sexual way. It feels exciting and she is enjoying herself. She moves her lips along the side of his hip.
"You torment this Sesshomaru," he heaves out between deep breaths. The kisses made him want to climb the walls, to flip her onto her back, yet restraint, he had to restrain himself for her sake.
"No more than he deserves," she jokes, before scraping her teeth against his thigh, nipping lightly. She continues to stroke his penis, enjoying each time she sees his muscle twitch. She wonders what it would feel like inside her. Her own fire is burning. She pulls her hand away, looking up at his face. She slides her hand up his abs and along his chest. Her right leg shifts up and over shakily to straddle his abs. She leans down to kiss his lips, feeling the wonderful texture and the way they move with her, letting the movements sooth her nerves.
He moves with her, allowing her to experiment with what it would feel like when he entered. He finally raises a hand and slowly caresses one of her shaking legs. "It's okay," he whispers, opening his eyes.
Avalon nods, staring deep into his eyes as she rocks her hips, grinding her clit into him, pushing her breasts into his chest. She reaches behind her, stroking his cock with her hand, the other hand holds the side of his face to bring her lips to his, relaxing and enjoying the way he is allowing her to be in control. She was never in control of her sexual experiences.
He groans in pleasure feeling himself bubble at the tip. "Will you let this Sesshomaru touch you now?" Anymore and he would finish in her hand.
Avalon swallows her nerves and nods her head. "Yes," she whispers to him.
He rolls her onto her back, finding a place for himself between her legs, putting slight pressure against her opening to warm her to him. He lifts his torso, so his hand holds his head up and sweetly kisses her mouth. 'Trust me.' He begs in his mind, he needs her. "What do you desire?"
Avalon trembles slightly under his body. "I...uh...kiss me?" she asks hopefully. 'Perhaps it will calm me.'
He brushes his lips against hers, sensually rocking his hips into hers. He grazes her lips slightly with his teeth, careful that his fangs don't cause damage to her supple skin. "What else?" It was tormenting his soul to allow her so much control. He satiates his own need by slowly gliding his hand along her hip, her side and finally the side of her breast, avoiding more intimate touch.
Avalon relaxes as his hand runs along her body sensually. "Touch me?" she asks questioningly.
He sits back on his haunches, kneeling over her. He runs his palm up her thighs stopping before her heat and retreating, purposely teasing her, but giving her time to relax into his touch. "Like that?"
Avalon nods her head but she is hungry for more. Lust clouds her mind. "More?"
He leans over her and kisses her throat, licking lazy circles under her chin, lost in her scent. 'How did this comfort me?' Vague memories of the first flare of pain in his stump stumble drunkenly into his mind. He had buried himself in her neck. His lips burn a trail against her skin, tender yet roughly at the same time.
Avalon tilts her head back, letting him have more access. He licks at the skin, enjoying the taste. His hand moves along her side, stopping at her breast and grabs the mound massaging it in his hand. His thumb and index finger roll the nipple back and forth as his mouth moves down her collarbone, to engulf the other breast.
Avalon's breath hitches as her fear buds up. "Stop!"
Sesshomaru smells her fear and pulls back, cupping her chin. "What's wrong?" He swallows roughly.
Avalon's lips tremble. "I...I… it's just" Avalon thickly swallows the grief pushing at her. "He did that to me," she whispers.
"Did what?" he asks her, removing himself from between her legs and lays down on his side next to her, rubbing her shoulders. "What did he do?" His chest flutters uncomfortably. 'What did he do? What did he ruin?' Guilt was a beast that was mastering him.
"He would try to make me beg for him to take me." Tears slip down from her eyes, along her cheeks. "He would play with my breasts, trying to get me to want him."
He pulls her into his chest, still trying to control himself. He's so hard it hurts and yet as he wraps her arm around his waist holding her and she nestles into his body he's filled with warmth again. He kisses her forehead, unsure of what he should say. "Do you want to stop?"
"I don't. I'm sorry. This is just more difficult than I thought it would be."
"Do you want to be touched somewhere else?"
"That's the hardest thing Sesshomaru. There isn't an inch of me he didn't violate." She hangs her head in shame. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be difficult."
"Shh," he quiets her, running his hand up and down her back. "Avalon," he tugs her chin out from it's hiding space against his chest. He presses his lips against hers. "When you are ready to resume, tell me." He lets her face go back against his chest while ignoring the pain of stiffness below. 'I'm going to kill him.'
Avalon nods her head against his chest. Looking up, she reaches her hand out to cup his cheek. "Kiss me for now?"
"For now, this Sesshomaru will submit to you." He opens his mouth over hers.
Avalon pulls him down to her mouth, allowing their tongues to dance as tears still flow from her eyes. She so badly wants to give him what he needs and what her body craves, but she just keeps getting scared.
He pulls back and mutters against her lips. "I want you to finish." He kisses her neck. "To know pleasure. Trust this Sesshomaru." He holds her upper arm, eyes intense, waiting for her to answer.
"I trust you Sesshomaru, that isn't what my issue is."
He thinks to himself how to help her become comfortable with his touch. "What do you need? To be comfortable? To let me touch you?"
"Clothes might help." She winks at him.
He gets up sadly and still painfully hard, walking to his clothes.
"Where are you going?" she asks confused and hurt.
"You said to get dressed," he answers, completely befuddled. "I will not force you."
"I... meant for me," she says just above a whisper embarrassed.
"You make no sense, Avalon." He goes to her kimono, the juban is tattered now, and hands her the kimono, then sits down, keeping his distance cross legged. "Talk to me," he prods her gently and his head falls slightly, feeling another something else in his chest. 'I have been with virgins, I have been with many women, never one that has been violated.' He scoots closer to her and pulls her forehead down to his. "I will submit," he repeats himself. "What do you need?"
Avalon puts the kimono on but leaves it open. "I probably won't make sense for a while, Sesshomaru. What I need mostly, is time and until then, I can improvise. It was why I wanted the juban on when we started. He would strip me bare. Without anything on, I feel more vulnerable. It's stupid, it's not like you can't shred this as easily as you did the juban," she says shyly and slightly ashamed of confessing herself to him.
"Do not be embarrassed." He slowly kisses her lips. "It's your first time. I have never…" he wants to choke on the growing emotion in his chest until he latches onto the word she had said, 'vulnerable'. "I have never been with a woman like you before. Let me show you what it should have been like."
Avalon bites her cheek before nodding. She would love to know what it should have been like. "Alright," she whispers to him while looking at him trustingly.
He takes his time warming her mouth again and puts gentle pressure on her back, trying to get her to move into his lap. He straightens his legs, making it easier for her. "Come closer."
Avalon gingerly moves closer and straddles his legs
He caresses her chin and her eyes. "You're safe Avalon. You're safe," he repeats himself, slowly folding his legs again to create a nest for her body to slide tightly into his. His mouth falls on her shoulders and then her chin before engulfing her mouth again. He can feel himself licking at her lips below. "Shh," he mutters bringing her thighs closer to his hips, then his hand begins to explore. He tentatively reaches out to touch her breast that is hidden beneath the cloth. "Is it good?"
"Hai, it feels good. Please I need to see your eyes," she says softly while her breath becomes more rapid.
He nods opening his eyes as he puts more pressure on her breast. He continues manipulating it, then brushes his thumb over her nipple. He moves his hand to her other breast watching her, scenting the air for fear but can smell none. He slides his hand down, between her breasts and her abs, seeking to touch her lower.
His skin covers in sweat and need until he can feel droplets dripping down his forehead and his fingers tremble slightly. 'Why do you trust me? With this? With your intimacy?' He presses the pad of his thumb into her clit, letting the bud slip back and forth. "This?" He pants against her mouth kissing her.
Avalon's breath is shallow and her body jumps each time his thumb runs over her nub "Good," she says, breathily.
His thumb keeps up its pace, leisurely circling her. But then as he brings her in for another tender kiss, he slides in one finger and then another, thrusting firmly, feeling her swell. "This?"
Avalon gasps when he pushes his fingers inside and feels the pleasure building within herself. She nods her head lazily. The pleasure continues building as she rocks with his hand still watching him. She feels herself muscles tightening further and further until it snaps. Her head rolls back as she holds to his shoulders, clinging for dear life. She pants never feeling anything like this before, rolling with the high.
"Like this," he keeps his fingers engaged, extending her pleasure. "It should have been like this." His mouth covers hers, so firmly and softly at the same time. "Are you ready?"
Avalon nods her head eagerly. "Yes," she says, still panting with the pleasure.
He lowers his knees, closing the distance between her core and his shaft. "Come down when you are ready." He grips her shoulder in anticipation.
Avalon brings herself to slowly lower herself on to it. She can feel him stretch her opening. He is larger than anyone previously. A slight whimper escapes her lips. She slowly rocks her hip to get used to the position.
He gasps as she sheathes him, nearly coming from that motion alone. His mouth opens and closes at how hot, wet and tight she is. His breathing speeds and his hold on her shoulder tightens. "Does it hurt?" the words pour from his mouth as he holds her and the warmth in his chest spreads and intensifies.
Avalon looks at him. "It hurts a little but not much. I will be fine," she says in a whisper as pain still emanates from him stretching her.
His hand moves to her back to bring her closer, so he can feel all of her. "You feel so good," he groans as his hips slowly rock into hers. Their foreheads touch and their lips. "Is it okay?"
"It is," she says against his lips, rolling her hips as he pushes into her.
He groans again, deep growls of pleasure and ecstasy against her neck, his mouth sucks the tender flesh. He wants her to finish again so he reaches down to help her, finding her bud and circling it again, urging her where he wants her. "Avalon," he moans.
Avalon's hips move faster as she moves up and down his shaft while his finger stimulates her. She moans with pleasure and feels herself building to a precipice until she feels the dam break and ecstasy takes her as she keeps her eyes focused on the golden pools of Sesshomaru's eyes. "Sesshomaru," she moans out as her lips crash down onto his mouth.
The pulsing is too much and he cups her ass, forcing her harder down onto his shaft and turns the slow rocking into a faster movement, covering her body in his sweat. He revels in the way she feels around him as he slides in and out of her. He can tell he will not last much longer and takes a moment to slow down. 'More,' he wants it to last longer.
"Don't slow down. Do not try to prolong this, not now," Avalon warns desperately. She didn't know when or if she would lose her focus and fear might creep back in and she wanted him to get his release.
Sesshomaru speeds up his pace to find his release and with a final thrust, he empties his seed into her, coating her womb. "Avalon," he kisses her cheek while pulling her hair into a tail by her neck. He pulls out of her quickly, concerned by her admonishment. 'Why wouldn't she want to prolong the pleasure?' He can't believe his body is dripping with dew or the feeling in his chest. Sex had never felt like this before. Not so warm, so inviting as if she trusted him with all of her being. "Like this," he holds her tightly. "It should have been like this."
"This was wonderful. Thank you," she says, gratefully. 'I can't believe I did it without panicking.' Avalon's body relaxes against his knowing that she can trust him with everything she is.
"You will tell this Sesshomaru when you want it again. The craving will return in time." He moves onto his side, taking her with him. 'Why am I holding her? I never would have before.'
Avalon sighs happily cuddling into his side. "I will," she says tiredly.
"Is it sore?" he asks her concerned that he had hurt her.
"Not really, it's a little bit but it's already fading," she says wistfully.
"Good. He rubs her back through the kimono, satisfied with the interaction. "You are mine." His chest puffs and deflates less quickly.
Avalon raises a brow. "Does that mean you are mine?"
"Don't presume too much."
"What does that mean Sesshomaru?" She mimics his tone, "Don't presume too much"
"You are female," he says blandly.
"AND that means what?"
"You are incapable of ownership." He leans his chest into her side, kissing her neck.
"I don't want to own you but I don't want to be owned either. But if you insist I am yours then you better be mine."
He covers her mouth with his hand, barely able to reach her lips with more than his index and middle finger. "You speak too often."
She opens her mouth and bites at his finger lightly, clamping down.
He growls at her in warning, nipping at her shoulder.
She growls right back, still holding his fingers in her mouth.
He pulls them back frustrated, dumping her onto the ground, standing up and stomping to his clothes.
She gets up, following him and reaches down grabbing his clothes. "Don't think to silence me by physical means Sesshomaru," she warns. She bends down holding the hakama open for him.
He rips the pants out of her hands, sliding one foot in awkwardly, nearly tripping, then putting the other one in, pulling them up and loosely tying them with one hand. He starts grabbing his underlayer, slinging it over his left shoulder, holding it in place with his mouth while sliding his right arm in and working the ties, annoyed that he can't get them.
Avalon watches amused, even as she feels the anger in his aura. She steps in front of him. "Order me to tie them if you wish or don't."
He ignores her and grabs his hankimono, throwing it over his left shoulder first holding it in place again. He picks up his armor, katana, obi and shoes and starts walking away.
Avalon shakes her head. "You just going to leave me here? Your woman."
'A woman incapable of submission,' his mind seethes. He kneels down pulling his shoes back on. 'A woman incapable of giving this Sesshomaru an heir.' He lashes out at her, "You cannot provide this Sesshomaru an heir! You cannot submit!" He fumbles with the ties again.
Avalon feels indignant. "What do you mean I can't give you an heir?" She crosses her arms. "And I told you, I'm not submissive. You told me you wanted a strong willed partner and that is what you got."
He becomes furious with her inability to consider his pride, finally managing to close the ties. He pulls his armor over his head and then says, "you are incapable of having children, incapable of leaving an heir behind. You are not what this Sesshomaru wanted in a mate," the words come out bitterly as he throws the obi over his shoulder and grips Tenseiga.
"I'm sorry," she says sincerely. "I might be able to have children for you. I don't know but I'm sorry I'm not what you wanted," her voice sounds defeated and her arms hang down as her shoulders slump.
"Not the child I would want to leave behind," he says furiously. "Not like this Sesshomaru, something with tainted blood, something other." He slams his fist into a tree. 'I should have let her die.' He starts moving to the forest again.
Avalon starts crying. She can't give him a pureblooded child, she knows that, so she really doesn't know what to say. She falls on her knees. "What do you want from me Sesshomaru? I'm very new to this and you're not helping me understand. Forgive me."
He pulls his obi off his shoulder and begins trying to tie it again. "Caring only about yourself prevents your understanding." The last word comes out as a jibe.
"Then help me. I can only go by what I know. Lay it out for me. Don't expect me to just know what I'm supposed to be like."
He slides tenseiga into his obi and turns on her, eyes lined with emotions, stress, his hand running up to his left shoulder again. "You only care about your traditions, the customs of this place you come from. I am not human, I will not become your lap-dog."
Avalon shakes her head trying to clear the tears. "I don't want a lap-dog Sesshomaru. But in my time there are no youkai and I can only go by human traditions. So help me adapt. I want to make you happy without losing myself in the process."
"You're time?" He becomes furious. "You're time?" He approaches her, "is there anything you didn't lie about? First a traveler from another land, now another time?"
"I am from another land and another time. I'm from the future Sesshomaru or at least I think it's the future. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before but would you have believed me?"
"You are deceitful, dishonorable," he backs away in disbelief. "I should have not saved your life, bound myself to one such as you." He needs space before he explodes, before he lashes out. "You cannot be what this Sesshomaru needs in a mate. Incapable of truth, of bearing children…"
Avalon stays on her knees. She whispers, "I'm so sorry, this is never what I intended. I'm sorry." Her body slumps to the ground as she feels herself buckle under his words and regret.
"Go back to the hut," he bites out and flies away leaving Avalon behind.
"Yeah sure cause I know exactly where I am," Avalon says dejectedly.
A/N During this time where we are all under stress and anxiety, I hope my readers can get lost in the world me and my co-author Elohiniar created. Writing this has given me an escape from my own worries and I love hearing from my readers. Thank you for your continued loyalty and for your reviews, please leave a review.
ASJS- I'm so glad you enjoyed the last chapter. Thank you for reviewing.
Itzatakahashi- Avalon has endured and she will continue to endure and as you can see Hikari is well at least for now, duhn duhn duhn. Find out what happens next chapter. Thanks for your continued loyalty.
Curlystruggle- I am sorry it hurt so much but Avalon is a strong character and she isn't one to give up. I wanted my story to be emotionally engaging and it seems I have succeeded. Thank you for enduring the hardship and I hope you enjoy the rest of the story. Thanks for your review.
Lycan777- Thanks for the review and I plan on continuing on.