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Coffee Shops and Cameras

Chapter 30

3 Weeks Later.

KAORU

Kaoru climbed the darkened staircase, glancing into his brother's room as he went. Of course, no one was inside. Hikaru's suitcase was still laid unpacked after being god-knows-where for 2 weeks at the foot of his unmade bed. Kaoru ignored the countless emptied bottles on the night-stand and continued to make his way to the dining room.

At the table were his Mom and Dad, but once again, no Hikaru. Not that he was surprised.

His place was still laid out, but Kaoru doubted anyone actually expecting him to show up for breakfast.

His Mom glanced up hopefully as he entered the room, but once she saw it wasn't who she thought she simply smiled lovingly and lowered her coffee cup.

This had pretty much been the standard routine since the day Hikaru stormed out of the interview. No one had seen him, apart from the odd passing in the hallway. And even then he wouldn't talk to anyone, no matter who it was. None of it made any sense, and there were no answers to be found.

The day after everything came crashing down, Kaoru found his brother drunk and throwing clothes into a suitcase at 2am. When he asked where he was going, Hikaru simply replied - "Anywhere but here" before bundling himself into a town car. Mom was hysterical, assuming the absolute worst. The whole family were in a blind panic, until eventually he came lumbering through the front door in the middle of the night a couple of days before, bag in hand, looking like complete shit. He didn't tell anyone where he went or what he'd been doing, but Kaoru assumed he'd been drinking for most of it. Maybe Hikaru wasn't even sure where he went either?

After a very quiet breakfast Kaoru decided to go back to Hikaru's room, hoping to find something – nae – anything, that could give him some clue as to what was going on. He'd been doing this religiously whenever he could for the last 3 weeks, just hoping that he'd leave a note, a receipt or something that could clue Kaoru in on what was going on.

Kaoru had his own theories, but none of them made any sense to him.

He just didn't understand why.

Why did he fly off the handle? Why did he break up with Haruhi when he had said himself that he was in love with her? What the hell happened in the time between leaving to get his phone and them finding him in the corridor?

Theory number 1.

Hikaru had cold feet. He'd been so distracted by his growing feelings for Haruhi that he hadn't quite let the importance of the interview sink in until the very last moment. Then he panicked and bailed.

But that didn't explain why he ended things with Haruhi. He said he loved her. He never loved anyone. He wouldn't throw that word around for no reason, not unless he meant it.

Theory number 2.

Fear.

Fear that he was repeating what happened with Seika. Fear that Haruhi would be just like her. Fear that this interview would only paint him in a worse light. Fear of change, or things not changing.

But he knew Haruhi wasn't like her. What would have made him think that in such a small window of time?

And finally, theory number 3.

Something happened.

Someone got to him.

Someone threatened him.

But who?

Kaoru had an idea, but he wasn't 100% sure. Because it couldn't have been...could it? It had been so many years, there was no possible way she could have done something. Unless she was just that crazy. Which...honestly she might have been.

He hadn't mentioned it on the day. But the reason he'd shown up late to the office was because he'd seen something. Or rather, someone. As he'd pulled into the parking lot he swore he'd seen a very familiar looking brunette jumping out of a white Audi. It had been almost 7 years since he'd last seen her, but the same uneasy feeling hit him in the gut as he watched her approach the entrance. At first he shrugged it off, thinking there was no way it could have been Seika. Because why would it? She hadn't spoken to or seen any of them since her and Hikaru broke up, the only things they'd heard from her were all the stories and lies she sold to the media. But that was years ago. Why the hell would she still be hung up on him? He kept his distance as he went into the building, but still trying to get a better look at her face. Eventually she wandered into an elevator, and not wanting her to see him - just in case it was who he thought it was, he stayed back and waited until he was sure the elevator was free to use.

After Hikaru's reaction however, Kaoru was thinking about the familiar woman more and more. It was just too much of a coincidence that Kaoru had seen someone who looked just like Seika in the same building barely an hour before Hikaru snapped. If it was her then she must have said something to him. But it wasn't like Kaoru could straight out ask Hikaru about it, it was unlikely he'd tell the truth, especially since he seemed to be either hungover or drunk whenever anyone saw him.

Kaoru pulled open the curtains in his brother's room, letting daylight pour in for the first time in 3 weeks. The state of the room was overwhelming, bed unmade, clothes thrown on the floor, drawers open and pulled from dressers, drained beer and whiskey bottles lined the carpet, and empty packs of cigarettes fell from every surface. The maids had tried to clean it as usual from day 1 of Hikaru's breakdown, but after a drunken verbal lashing from him they didn't dare go near the room anymore. Two of them even quit, leaving the property in tears.

Kaoru's first target for clues was the dishevelled suitcase at the foot of the bed, mostly it was filled with unwashed clothes that were stuffed inside until they were either stretched or creased, but amongst the mess Kaoru came across several empty bottles, all of which had labels written in French.

Paris. So that's where he went. All the way to fucking Paris.

Hikaru used to go to some wild parties over in Paris, back then it was mostly for networking, but Kaoru seriously doubted he'd gone to work on this occasion. Chances were he'd gone to the house they owned over there and spent the 2 weeks drowning his liver alone until the bar was empty.

At least that's one mystery solved.

But what about the others?

Kaoru pulled his phone from his pocket and scrolled through his texts, trying to focus on mystery number 2. Haruhi still hadn't answered him. He'd been trying to get hold of her since the day she packed up her things and went back home but she'd been ignoring him. Every text and voicemail was met with silence. The only thing he'd heard from her was from when she called Mom and told her she was taking all her vacation days, aside from that, nothing. He wondered how she was feeling. Probably like shit.

I should go see her.

But would she want to talk to him? She seemed pretty adamant to get away from all Hitachiins the day Hikaru fucked her over. Kaoru couldn't exactly blame her. Hikaru had been so brutal, you could practically pin point the exact moment he tore her heart out by the way she flinched at his words.

Really, Kaoru just wanted to voice his theories out to someone. He'd spoken to the guys about it but they were so disgusted by the way Hikaru had turned on Haruhi they didn't even care what the reason was. All of them had grown to love Haruhi as if she were one of them, the fact that Hikaru had hurt her so bad made them all furious with him.

"Morning" a guff voice grumbled from behind.

Kaoru looked over his shoulder to see his brother walking into the room. He looked like shit. His hair was a mess, face unshaven, his eyes were bloodshot with exhaustion and ringed with dark circles, and he was dressed in unwashed jeans and a creased ACDC t-shirt.

Has he always had that shirt? He certainly recognised it.

"What are you doing?" Hikaru asked in a stoic tone as he studied Kaoru hunched over his suitcase.

"Cleaning up" Kaoru replied, "This place looks like shit"

Hikaru shrugged, "Really. I hadn't noticed"

Kaoru tried not to roll his eyes and straightened up to the same identical height as his brother. But honestly, he had never felt more different to him in their whole 28 years. His twin looked nothing like the brother he'd grown up with and loved.

"Where have you been?" the younger twin asked, trying to sound casual.

"Out" Hikaru replied.

Kaoru huffed.

"You want a google maps screenshot?"

"No. I just want to know where you keep disappearing to. I'm gonna guess it was a bar?"

Hikaru seemed to ignore him and made a B line into the connecting bathroom. He splashed some water on his face and braced himself against the sink with his head down.

"Since when haven't you been able to talk to me Hika?" Kaoru heard the sorrow in his voice as he leaned against the open door-frame. Hikaru met his eyes in the mirror.

"There's nothing to talk about"

"Don't lie to me" Kaoru shook his head, "We've never lied to each other"

"I'm not lying. I have nothing to say"

With exasperation Kaoru palmed his face roughly. He was losing him. And losing Hikaru felt like losing a limb. He wanted to knock some sense into him, to shake him until he let everything out. He didn't care if he started screaming and shouting, at least it would have been something. This version of Hikaru felt so...blank.

"You went to Paris last week" Kaoru stated. It wasn't a question because he already knew the truth.

Hikaru gave a lazy smirk, "Wow. Now you're snooping through my shit?"

"I wouldn't have to if you spoke to me"

"Have you not considered that the reason I went to Paris was so I didn't have to speak to anyone?"

"You've never shut me out like this Hika. Please just give me something. It's obvious you're not okay so why can't you confide in me?"

Hikaru stayed silent but Kaoru wasn't letting this go. This was the most he'd heard of his brother's voice in almost a month and there was no way he was going to cut the conversation short. God only knew when the next chance would be.

"Did you know Haruhi hasn't been to work since you walked out on her? She's not even answering anyone's messages or calls"

At the mention of Haruhi's name Hikaru straightened up, his knuckles turning white around the rim of the sink.

Finally. A reaction.

"You told me you were in love with her. So how? How could you do that to her? Is that what you wanted? To hurt her?"

"Get. Out" Hikaru's voice growled.

"You're gonna throw me out too? Like you did to the woman who loved you?"

Hikaru suddenly turned away from the mirror and strode up to his twin, making him flinch a little as he grit his teeth angrily. Kaoru saw the pain in his eyes, so much goddamn pain. He was still in love with her too. He could see it. So why? Why did he throw that away?

Theory number 2 is out.

"You had everything Hika. An opportunity. Respect. Love. What do you have now?"

Hikaru's chest seemed to rise and fall with heavy angry breaths. Then his arm shot through the doorway, over Kaoru's shoulder and settled on the dresser beside the door. His fingers wrapped around the neck of an opened whiskey bottle.

"This" he said, "I have this"

He brought the bottle to his lips and took a long painful swig.

"I gotta pee. You gonna stand there and watch?"

"This is pathetic Hika"

He didn't reply, instead he just stared at his twin as if waiting for him to make a move. After a few moments Kaoru could no longer stand his brother's agonised gaze, and quickly left the room, not wanting to give Hikaru the satisfaction of a glance over his shoulder.

But once in the hallway Kaoru could barely take another step. He collapsed against the wall, burying his face in his hands to force back the tears threatening to spill over.

This was so fucked. His brother was gone. The man in that room was a complete stranger. He almost missed the Hikaru he had before, even though he was a hot-headed asshole at least he was still somewhat human.

What the fuck happened to you Hika?

After a few minutes of sitting there in silence, Kaoru heard Hikaru moving around in his room and peeked around the corner to see him shrugging on a jacket. He then watched as he swabbed at his cheeks, as if wiping away tears. Then he noticed his brother's eyes. They were red and puffy. He'd been crying.

Kaoru couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Hikaru cry.

His heart hurt as he watched his brother try to compose himself even though it was clear he was in a lot of pain. Maybe Kaoru went too far talking about Haruhi? It was so clear that Hikaru was still so in love with her. Which only made the whole situation all the more confusing. If Hikaru really was in love with Haruhi, then why did he end things?

Kaoru prepared to run into his room as Hikaru started making his way to the door, but just before Hikaru could reach it, the sound of a ringtone interrupted him, stopping him in his tracks. He then dug his hand into his pocket and pulled out his cell. His expression changed as he looked at the screen. An expression somewhere between hopelessness and anger.

Who's calling him?

Kaoru waited for Hikaru to answer, but instead, he silenced it and threw it at his bed with so much force - that had it been aimed at the floor it would have shattered. Then he continued out of the room, barely giving Kaoru enough time to hide around the corner.

He waited until he heard the clear sound of descending footfalls on the stairs and the loud slam of the front door before emerging back out into the hallway and re-entering his brother's room. He didn't even need to think about what he was doing as he immediately went to the bed and scooped up the cell. And even though the jingle had been silenced, it still vibrated in his hand.

Kaoru looked at the phone and was taken aback by what he saw.

An unrecognised number kept lighting up the screen with text after text, each message more demanding than the last. The notifications popped up one after the other.

- Answer me

- Hikaru

- HIKARU

- You can't keep ignoring me

- Remember what I told you

- Answer your fucking phone

Kaoru furrowed his brows, "What the fuck?" he murmured to himself.

Then the screen lit up completely and began to ring. The number was calling again.

"Shit, shit, shit" Kaoru hissed.

Who the hell was this? What did they say to Hikaru? Why so many messages?

Curiosity coursed through Kaoru's fingertips as they twitched towards the green 'answer call' button. This had to be the reason for Hikaru's breakdown. There was no way this insistent caller wasn't connected.

Kaoru cleared his throat, then without a second thought, he pressed the screen.

He deepened his voice to match Hikaru's, and took a deep breath, "Hello"

HARUHI

I stared into my glass as I poured myself another drink. Watching as the amber liquid filled it to the rim. I didn't bother recapping the bottle, knowing full well I'd be back for another drink in under 10 minutes. I threw back gulp after gulp, staring at the ceiling until I'd drained it of it's very last drop.

I guess 10 minutes was too ambitious.

"Honey I'm leaving" Dad picked up his bag from the dining chair across from me, then froze when he saw me there cradling an empty glass of whiskey. I barely looked up at him, "Sweetie please, not this again" he heaved.

"Dad, not today"

"Not today? You don't want to hear it any day. You can't just sit here and wallow, you're only hurting yourself"

If only I felt 'hurt'. Honestly after these last few weeks I found I couldn't feel anything. Once the last tears dried up and I could no longer cry, everything just kind of went numb. I wasn't even sure how long it had been. 2 weeks? 3? A month? I lost count many drunken nights ago.

"Have a good day at work" I murmured, reaching for the bottle again.

Dad's hand swung down on it and pulled it away before I could wrap my fingers around the neck. I frowned as I watched him carry it to the sink, then pour the contents down the drain.

"That was expensive" I muttered.

"You can afford it" Dad replied, folding his arms, "Although maybe not for long if don't go back to work. You're almost out of vacation days. Are you even ready to go back to Mrs Hitachiin?"

No.

"I'm fine" I replied.

"Don't lie to me"

I shrugged, which only made him sigh sadly.

"I'll be back in a few hours. Please eat something"

I nodded unconvincingly.

"Haruhi Fujioka. Do as your father tells you" he snapped.

My eyes shot to him and suddenly I felt as if I were 15 again. I could see the heartbreak in his eyes, a feeling I was now all too familiar with. I couldn't help but feel even more pained as I looked at him.

So I nodded, "Sorry Dad" I spoke quietly.

Dad didn't look fully convinced, but his expression seemed to soften as he sighed.

"When I get home, we need to talk" he said.

I nodded.

Nothing else was said as Dad left for work, the sound of the door clicking shut echoing around the silent room, leaving me sat there at the kitchen table staring into my empty glass.

Dad and I had "talked" every night since I'd been home. We never really got anywhere. Dad would tell me he was worried, he would tell me Hikaru was just an asshole and there would be someone else, he would tell me that drinking myself to sleep over a man was stupid, and I would ignore him and go to my room. The next night it was rinse and repeat. Truly, I had fucked up. I was completely destroying my father's mental health, but I couldn't seem to stop it. I just didn't know how else to be.

The night I came home was the same day everything had come crashing down around me. Kaoru had driven me back to the Hitachiin house to grab my stuff, and within 20 minutes he was helping me into the front door of mine and Dad's apartment. Dad took one look at my tear soaked face and bundled me up in his arms as if I were a child again and just let me cry against him until my sobs subsided.

Needless to say, Dad was hurting too just seeing me like this.

I wished more than anything I could just be his Haruhi again. I'd imagined when I came back home I would be the same as I was when I left. Then when things progressed with Hikaru I thought I'd come home happier than before. But now...now I didn't recognise who I was. I didn't want to hurt Dad but I also had no idea how to stop it. I just couldn't pick myself back up like I used to.

I couldn't even go to work, the idea of being surrounded by any reminder of...him, made my heart break all over again. I hadn't even left the house in fear I'd accidentally pass by a magazine stand and catch a glimpse of the man I love on the cover.

Yes. Love – present tense.

I'd tried to hate him. The first thing I wanted to do was hate him. He'd left me feeling broken, used, manipulated, surely you should automatically hate someone who makes you feel that way. But for some cruel reason I just couldn't. And that's what hurt the most. I still loved him, but I also couldn't stand him.

I knew I'd have to face the music at some point. I had to go back to work soon or I'd end up letting Yuzuha down, and more importantly Dad and I wouldn't have any money to live on. Yuzuha had made sure the apartment's rent was paid up for the year, but food, bills and essentials – that was all on us. And Dad couldn't cover all of that on his own pay.

I wouldn't be able to work from the Hitachiin house, that went without saying. Which meant I would be meeting Yuzuha at her office. It was an improvement from being in the house I'd spent many nights laid beside Hikaru, but I still knew there would be posters, photos, his name would be thrown around, and I'd have to design clothes for him to wear. Which meant eventually, I'd have to see him.

Honestly, I didn't want to. I really didn't want to.

If I could go the rest of my life without hearing the name 'Hikaru Hitachiin' or seeing that man in person or in photos - I would be better off. Probably not happier. But it would make everything easier. For my sanity at least.

I lowered my face into my palms and let out an anguished whimper. I wished more than anything I hadn't taken this job. I wished I'd never gone to that runway show with Dad. I wished I'd never fallen in love with my employer's son. Yes, I'd still be stuck in a job I hated, but had I known then how much worse off I'd feel after this ordeal, I doubt I would have complained about my life ever again.

I spent the next few hours sat on the couch staring blankly at a movie I wasn't paying attention to. I let myself just melt into the cushions, ignoring the nagging in my head that reminded me I needed to change out of my goddamn batman shorts and brush my neglected hair. It must have been around 3 when I heard an abrupt knocking on the front door.

I ignored it.

Then the knock came again.

Ignoring...

Another succession of knocks.

I stared at the TV.

More knocking.

"Fuck off!" I shouted, not giving a damn who it was.

The knocking only got louder.

With a growl of frustration I rolled off the sofa and lumbered to the front of the apartment.

"Shut up, I'm coming!" I snapped.

I grabbed the handle and threw open the door, readying myself to release the full force of my inner pain on the poor unsuspecting guest on my front step.

But as I opened my mouth to channel the devil himself my heart dropped as my eyes settled on the 6ft form in front of me.

Standing on my doorstep was a face I really wasn't expecting to see, and really hadn't wanted to.

It wasn't his face. But it was close enough.

My voice came out as a croak, "Kaoru?"

The younger twin nodded slowly, "Can I come in? I need to talk to you"

Sorry for the wait on this one guys, I know a lot of you were eager to find out what happens next! Hopefully this didn't disappoint!

Can't believe I'm at chapter 30 already! I swear it was only yesterday I uploaded the prologue!

Please remember to Review/Favourite/Follow, and let me know what you think! Any questions? Feel free to message me on twitter - YulisanWrites.

Lots of love!

Yuli xx