Hey guys, so here is the next one for you. Word of warning, this is a tough chapter, it was tough for me to write and I shed a few tears of my own. I won't say too much as I don't want to spoil it for you but just so you know the second half is a tough read and for that I apoligise.
Matt moved through the house quickly, expertly carrying the wood on his shoulder, the man ready for the rest of the afternoon ahead. When he'd returned to the hospital two nights ago Gabby had been quick to continue the conversation about him going home and completing the work that needed doing, his wife expressing her concern that if it didn't get done soon it wouldn't get done at all. At first he resisted telling her that he didn't want to keep leaving her in the hospital especially when they still weren't sure if she was completely in the clear or not but she wouldn't drop the subject until he agreed and whereas he usually would have chastised her for speaking to him in the way she did that night, he knew she was right. So he had agreed all be it reluctantly and for the past two days he and Severide had been at the house laying the new kitchen floors, the two now moving onto the last few cabinets before they were going to start work on the new decking, the wood for which had just arrived, the wood he was currently carrying in from the trucks outside and through to their garden.
"Kelly can you grab those last few please?" He asked as he maneuvered his way through the kitchen to the back door.
"Sure thing boss" Kelly responded jogging out to the front of the house.
Matt rolled his eyes at the smart response his friend had given, the man repeatedly teasing him all day. Just as he put the wood down his phone began to ring, the man pulling it from his pocket and smiling when he saw who it was. "Hey" he smiled, as her picture popped up on the screen, "miss me already?"
"Was just checking in, Dr Manning's just been in."
"Oh yea?" he asked resting his back against the wall trying to shade himself from the glare of the sun on his phone. "What she say?"
"Everything's good, still looks like I'm on track to be allowed home next week" she smiled, the woman's eyes lighting up at his smiling face.
"That's good, I'll tell Kelly to get a move on with this work then." He joked.
"How you getting on?" she asked, positioning herself against the bed head.
"Good, we're doing good. The wood for the decking just arrived and the flooring in the kitchen is done. Hopefully we'll be finished by the weekend as long as the weather stays like this." He said, turning the camera so she could see the clear blue skies above him. For the end of March it was a lot warmer than they had be used to recently, the past few years having colder starts to the springtime but this year was the complete opposite, the air being thick with warmth and the sun beating down against them for long periods of time. The otherwise cooler month being remarkably warm and dry recently. Something that Matt couldn't help but be thankful for considering they were in the middle of moving house, but something he was also aware Gabby was struggling with, the heat making her pregnancy that much more uncomfortable at times.
"Let's hope so, then we can just focus on getting everything for these pair ready" Gabby said rubbing her hand along her bump as she spoke, the two of them sitting in a comfortable silence for a few moments, Matt watching his wife with a contented smile on his face, the woman on the other end of the phone completely focused on their unborn children. There moment was however interrupted when Severide came crashing through the back door, the man almost falling forwards as his foot caught on the slight lip in the frame.
"Shit!" He shouted loudly, Matt's head snapping up to see his friend readjusting the wood in his arm.
"You ok there Sev?"
"Peachy!" He responded flashing Matt a look when he saw the younger man on his phone. "Is that the wife?"
"Hey Kelly" Gabby shouted when she heard his question, "Matt says you've made good progress today."
Placing the wood against the other planks Kelly walked back across to where Matt was stood, the husband turning the phone slightly so his friend could see his wife. "Yup. Your husband here is a real slave driver." He chuckled, Matt shooting him a glare. "But in all seriousness we do seem to be getting a lot done. What about you? How you doing?"
"I'm good, Dr Manning just did her check in for the day. Everything seems good, should still be coming home next week."
"Good, that's good. Well we best get a move on if your going be home soon to inspect it all." Kelly said, the playful tone in his voice making them all chuckle softly.
"I should probably let you get back to it then?" She asked her eyebrows raising slightly.
"You should." Matt agreed, blowing her a kiss "I love you."
"Love you too. See you later."
"So what's next?" Kelly asked, watching Casey as he slid his phone back into his pocket, "you wanna start the decking today?"
"Let's tidy up inside first and then we can see where we are at." Matt said moving into the house, the man looking around at the dust sheets still covering all the units. "It's getting late. And we still need to get those last few cabinets hung."
"It's like one in the afternoon.."
"Yeah but we've been here since first thing. I don't want Gabby being by herself all day."
"What" Matt said when he saw the look spreading across his friends face.
"Nothing." He said holding his hands up. Matts stare intensifying "it's just you're very protective at the moment. I mean you always have been, but I guess it's more... obvious these days."
"Yeah well she's carrying my children and she's not had it easy with this pregnancy. So forgive me if I want to do everything in my power to make sure she's doing ok."
"Hey I get it, I do. If it were Stella I'd be the same."
"How's that going by the way?" Matt asked pulling the covers of the island, the man immediately reaching to plug the coffee machine back in and get it set up. "Coffee?"
"I wouldn't say no." Kelly replied sitting himself on the stool he'd just uncovered. "Stella and I are good."
"But?" Matt asked, the firefighter sensing there was something playing on his friends mind.
"We kinda got into it the other night." He puffed out, the look of despair flashing across his face before he could mask it.
"What happened?" Casey asked pulling two mugs out of the cabinet above him.
"Well her sister called and she wouldn't answer. I asked why and she got all defensive saying it was none of my business and to stay out of her family affairs. I mean I know they've had some rough patches but I guess I didn't realise how bad it was. She was kinda off and snappy all day after that and by the evening I'd had enough of her persistent attitude."
Matt nodded in understanding, he too had, had those moments with Gabby. Those moments where her attitude towards him had come from something playing on her mind, and the end result being a huge blow out. Casey understanding just how frustrating it was to know the whole situation could be avoided if they had dealt with whatever it was earlier. The man also knowing that as short as his own fuse could be at times, Severide's was ten times worse.
"What'd you do?" He asked pushing a now steamy mug towards his friend, pulling another dust sheet off and sitting down."
"I sent her to the corner and then gave her what for." Kelly sighed. "I felt horrible afterwards, when she finally told me some stuff, I mean damn her and her sister..." he cut himself off knowing that his girlfriend had confided in him information she definitely wouldn't want to be public knowledge. "Well their parents, man I don't even This they deserve that title. But yea it was rough for them growing up."
"And how are things now?" Matt asked, very aware of what could happen when a confession like Stellas had come out, that mixed with a potential sub drop that sometimes happened after intense punishments.
"Ok" he said, his voice not convincing the younger firefighter at all.
"Sev?"
"They aren't great, I feel really guilty and she well, she's acting like she never opened up to me about it. And the mixture of both as just thrown our dynamic. She's been drinking a bit, and I think, no I know she's been tempted to... well let's just say she hasn't but"
"What sev?" Matt asked the mans mind going to a million different things his firefighter may have been tempted by."
"I caught her with some pills. She hadn't taken any." He quickly added when he saw Matt's face change. "Well I'm pretty sure she hadn't, she said I could test her if I wanted. I can't see her doing that if she'd... you know. But it scared me that she went there. That all of this..." he cut himself off again, his hand waving in the air before he took a sip of his coffee. The man pausing to gather himself before he continued. "I don't know. I know she's told Gabby some stuff but I just.. I gusss I never realised how bad stuff was with her family."
"Sev, one thing I've learnt over the past year especially?"
"What?"
"Treat her the same as always. Don't look at her with those eyes..." he looked at his friend, the sadness in the mans eyes shining back at him as clear as day, "it will only make her feel worse, be the shoulder she needs when she needs it, but try not to push too hard."
Silence filled the air around them as both men sipped on their coffees, the heavy weight Severide had been carrying slowly lifting as he chatted with his best friend. The two men thinking over the conversation they'd just had.
Casey tapped his foot impatiently as the floors slowly ticked by, the elevator slowly moving upwards through the hospital towards his wife's floor. Today was the day she was coming home, after a week in the hospital she was finally going to be sleeping in her own bed, in their home. They had a few things that needed to be done before they could leave one of them being the final scan from Dr Manning, and as long as her blood tests came back clear again, they would be all good to go. Matt returning from the cafe with a huge plate of pancakes for his wife, something she'd asked for almost immediately after waking up this morning. He was excited to get her home and show her all the work him and Kelly had been doing, he just hoped she was happy with it all. She hadn't said it out loud but he knew she had some reservations about them completing the work without her there, even if she'd practically thrown him out of the hospital to do so. Everyday he'd returned with pictures for her to look at, the woman immediately reaching for his phone each time he'd get back, each time she'd spend several minutes flicking through the various pictures he'd taken for her. It had been a long week for them all, Gabby's recovery being a little rocky at points, his wife suffering from lingering pain from her burst cyst. Thankfully though that had been all the hurdles they'd had to face, her bleeding having stopped shortly into their second day here, the antibiotics helping prevent any infection and thankfully keeping her out of the operating room.
"Hey baby" Matt said as he round the doorway into her room, the man stopping in his tracks as his eyes fell upon the sight in front of him. "What's wrong?"
Gabby was curled up on the bed her knees tucked up under her chin, tear stains flowing down her cheeks.
"It's nothing I'm fine" she said turning her head away, her hands brushing at the fresh tears resting in her eyes.
"Gabby?" He said approaching the bed quickly, the man sitting down beside her, his arm reaching out to rest around her shoulders as he pulled her in closer to him. "What's wrong baby?"
"Dr Manning just came in."
"Ok?" his tone telling her to continue.
"She said there's a problem with one of the babies."
"What?" Casey breathed out the weight of her words causing his stomach to drop, "what type of problem?"
"I don't know, she said she wanted to wait for you to get back." The tears in her eyes bellowing over the more she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper as she tried to keep herself together. Dr Manning hadn't said anything more than that, she had no reason to believe that what was wrong was anything serious, but something told her it was, something told her that whatever it was that was wrong was something big, something that was about to change their lives. And the medic in her kept going over and over all the different possible outcomes, all of the hundreds of things that could potentially be wrong, something that hadn't been picked up in any of her previous scans. Something that was scaring her the longer she waited to hear what it was.
A tense silence hung in the air around them, Casey opening his mouth several times before closing it again. The man unsure of what to say to his wife, or what to say at all. Everything was fine yesterday, they'd seen their babies on the screen and everything was fine. How had things changed over night? What on earth could be the issue that it has taken twenty weeks to find it? Why hadn't Dr Manning said anything before now if she had seen something concerning?
"Did you have a scan?" Matt asked carefully, his wife shaking her head against him.
"No, she said it was something they found yesterday but she wanted to be 100% before she came and spoke to us about it. Apparently she had fetal medicine look over the scans and they will be coming with her in a bit to do my final scan."
"It's ok baby" Matt comforted, his wife's body shaking as more tears escaped down her cheeks, the man doing everything he could to keep his breathing steady, knowing if he didn't he took the risk of Gabby completely losing it and possibly having a panic attack. "I've got you ok?" he whispered in her ear, his hand moving up and down her back as they sat there together on the bed. Both of them nervously waiting for the doctor to reappear. Gabby slowly eating the pancakes he'd brought her, each bite having to be forced by her as her stomach and mind fought against her, after eating all of one of the pancakes and some bacon she pushed the plate away. Matt refraining from commenting on how little she'd eaten knowing that it wasn't the time or place to be battling her reluctance for food, the man aware that the situation they were in probably wasn't helping the situation. Gabby rested her head back against his chest, the silence around the resuming quickly.
"Did she say how long it would be before they came back" Matt asked after twenty minutes, Gabby shaking her head against him.
"She just said she'd be back in soon."
"Do you want me to go find out?" Casey asked aware that the longer they sat and waited the more his wife and he were going to worry.
"Do you mind?"
"Of course not" he said pushing himself up of the bed, landing a soft kiss against her forehead before heading towards the door.
Gabby watched him leave, the wife sitting alone on the bed. Her mind racing. She was grateful that he'd suggested going to find out when they'd be coming back in, but a small part of her wished he'd stayed here, her concern and worry increasing the longer he was gone. The room feeling like it was closing in around her as her breaths got shallower and shallower, her heart beating faster as she fought against her emotions. At almost twenty one weeks pregnant she knew she needed to calm down, she knew having a panic attack wasn't the healthy or safest thing for her or the babies, but she also knew that she couldn't control it, not by herself, she never had been able to. What she needed right now was Matt, and he was just outside the room. Forcing herself to her feet she willed herself to make her way to him, the woman desperately clinging to her chest as her legs moved like they were weighed down. Moving the curtain from around her bed she could see him clearly in front of her just on the other side of the glass door, he was stood with his back towards her room speaking with one of the nurses at the desk. The man in front of her completely oblivious to her presence, reaching out her hand for the door, her ears filled with ringing, her conscious state rapidly leaving her as her mind fogged over. The woman not making it out of the door before she slumped down against it. The panic she was feeling completely consuming her body, as she fought to keep her eyes open.
"Gabby!" His voice sounded like it was miles away, cutting through the fog in her mind, "Gabby." He spoke again, his voice so soft and endearing, the gentle tone soothing her as she reached out blindly searching for him.
"Matt" she whimpered, her own voice sounded alien like to her, she wasn't even sure if she'd actually spoken or if it was just in her head. His hand gripping hers almost immediately as he mimicked her actions, bringing it to rest on his chest above his heart. His own hand resting on top of hers.
"It's ok, I'm here. Just breath ok, can you feel that?" He asked tapping his finger against the back of her hand. His wife nodding slowly, her fingers matching the steady beat it was feeling. The action calming her almost insistently. "Just concentrate on that ok, I've got you. You're ok." The couple sat on the hospital room floor for several long minutes, Gabby's breathing slowly evening out as she managed to breath her way through and out of her panicked state, Matt holding on tightly to her doing everything he could to help calm his wife.
"Thank you" she whispered against him as soon as she found her voice, her near death drip on his shirt releasing slightly.
"You don't need to thank me baby, I've told you I'll always help you through whatever. Are you ok?"
"I am" she nodded, her voice still barely above a whisper, but Matt could tell she wasn't lying to him even without being able to see her face properly, he could sense that she was returning to her normal self, and that all sense of panic had left her body. She was nervous still, even a little tense but she wasn't panicking anymore.
"Come on let's get you back in to the bed, the nurse said Dr Manning shouldn't be much longer." He hooked his arms under hers and lifted her from the ground, the woman's legs still be slightly weak but slowly they made it back to the bed, the young couple resuming the position they'd been in before Matt had gone to speak with the nurse. Gabby feeling a lot calmer now she was back in his embrace. She couldn't explain why she'd had a panic attack, she knew there was never a logical reason for them anyway but usually she knew what the cause had been, but today she didn't, she didn't understand why her mind had completely lost all sense the minute Casey had left the room. She had felt worried, and nervous but she hadn't felt panicky and the knowledge of that scared her slightly. Although it had been months since she'd last had one, she knew they always left her a little jumpy and nervous afterwards and she couldn't help but think that the same thing was going to happen this time. That because she'd had such an intense attack she was going to have to process all those feelings and after effects that so often followed, the thought causing a nauseous feeling to rise up inside of her. The feeling increasing the harder she tried to squash it, the paramedic all but launching herself off the bed as she dashed towards the bathroom, her sudden action catching her husband of guard. It wasn't until he heard the all to familiar sound of her retching that he realized what had happened, the man quickly following her, his heart dropping when he saw her returning all of the breakfast she'd eaten not much earlier coming back with force. Reaching out he pulled her hair back as she emptied the contents of her stomach, the husband rubbing soothing circles against her back like he had so many times before when she'd gotten sick.
Knocking on the door broke through the sound of Gabby's heaving, Dr Manning putting her head around the bathroom door, her eyebrows furrowing at the sight of her patient on her knees, retching heavily into the toilet in front of her. "Everything ok?" she asked.
Matt nodded, "She'll be ok, she's been struggling with nausea again, but this is the first time in a little while she's actually been this sick, usually it's a little retching and done, but I think she's brought up the entire contents of her stomach today. There can't be much left to come up."
Dr Manning nodded in understanding, the woman slightly concerned at just how rough a time the pregnant woman in her care was experiencing when it came to the common symptom of this pregnancy. Making a mental note to discuss it with the couple before discharging her today, she nodded her head back towards the room, silently indicating to Casey that she'd wait in there for them. The man smiling weakly in thanks for the privacy the doctor was granting him and his wife, from his experience with Gabby getting sick, he knew she hated an audience and he couldn't say he blamed her, there was nothing entertaining or fun about watching someone bring up their breakfast, lunch or dinner.
Matt was the first one to reappear in the hospital room, "Gabby's just brushing her teeth." He told Dr Manning, and the other doctor who the woman introduced as Dr Madden, Casey reaching out his hand to shake the man's in front of him. He could only assume that this was the fetal medicine specialist Gabby had mentioned earlier on to him. "Nice to meet you" he said sitting down on the bed.
"And you Mr Casey, is Mrs Casey ok?"
"She will be, she's not had it easy this pregnancy, I suppose multiple babies increase the symptoms more."
All three of them nodding in agreement, the Doctors and Matt falling into a easy conversation about nothing much in particular. The air around them clouding with anticipation the longer they waited for Dawson to return.
"So how's the house coming along?" Dr Manning asked.
"Really well thanks, we actually just finished up yesterday. Severide and I got a lot done this week, although I would have preferred to be here with Gabby, I know she spent a lot of time sleeping though so I suppose it was the right thing for her to kick me out." He said chuckling.
"I'm sure she appreciated you wanting to be here, but I also know Dawson pretty well and she's a pretty determined lady when she wants to be."
"Don't I know it" Matt said shaking his head.
Their conversation was halted when they heard the bathroom door open and close, Matt turning to see a rather pale and tired looking Gabby walking towards him, the man knowing that the mornings events had made her beyond tired. "You ok?" he asked when she sat down next to him, the woman automatically resting against his open arm, snuggling herself deep into his side.
"Yeah, just tired. I'll be ok." She assured him, she knew Matt and she knew if he didn't think she could deal with this conversation now he would make the doctors come back later, but she also knew that if she allowed that to happen she'd be stuck in this hospital room longer and all she really wanted was her own bed, in her own room, in her own house. She was tired, beyond it, she was exhausted mentally and physically but she knew the longer they put this off the harder it would be on her, the woman knowing that there was no way she could rest until she'd heard what the doctors needed to say.
"You sure? We don't have to do this now, if you need some slept."
"Honestly babe I'm fine, lets deal with this and then we can go home to bed yea?"
"Of course" he said kissing her head, the couples attention moving towards the doctors in front of them.
"Ok then, if you're ok Gabby we need to speak to both of you about something we saw on the scan yesterday." Dr Manning started, the woman leaning forwards in her chair as she began to talk to the couple, the woman knowing that the information she was about to give them was a lot. It was a lot or any parent to hear, and for these two parents in particular it would be harder because they'd already had a rough road with this pregnancy but not just that, but them both being emergency responders would understand what she was about to tell them more so than the average person that passed through the doors. She knew it wasn't information she could hold back, upon reviewing the scans from yesterday with Dr Madden for the most part of the afternoon and almost all of the morning, she was pretty certain as to what they were dealing with, and she knew the news would completely rock the expectant parents world. If it were her she'd probably have the same anxious feelings the couple in front of her were currently feeling, but there was no easy way to tell them, all she could do was focus on the facts and the facts were rather complex, there were a lot of unknowns and unfortunately nobody would know the full extent of the condition until after the babies were born, this problem, this condition was fixable it was, but it would solely depend on the state of the baby when they were born.
"Gabby said you said there's a problem with one of the babies?" Matt asked, the man squeezing his wife's shoulder gently when he felt her tense at his words. The man feeling the same sense of bitterness as they left his own lips.
"There is, I'm afraid so." Dr Manning said nodding her head, "Your daughter has what we called Transposition of the Great Arteries."
"What? What's that?" Matt asked, the mans knowledge of surgical and medical terms limited to those they used out in the field.
"Essentially your daughters heart is wired wrong, the chambers are backwards. While she is in the uteri she's perfectly fine and healthy the issue won't cause her any issues until she is born."
"Meaning what exactly?" he asked, the man glancing towards his silent wife, her lack of emotion or reaction causing his own body to tense.
"We don't have any certain's here Matt, although I have had a few patients with this condition and Dr Madden here has had his fair share, each case is different. All we know for sure at the moment is that she has this condition and it will require surgery, when and how much will depend on her and how she is at birth. Some babies are born and need immediate intervention, while some can make it all the way to their first birthday before needing anything major done. I'll let Dr Madden explain to you the condition in more detail, and I'm going to print you both off some information, that way you've got all the information we are going to give you to take home and look over. There is a lot of information, and some of it is pretty scary, but I want you to know I have the best team in place for your daughter already and no matter what happens I will try my hardest to deliver her healthily and give her the best chance at a normal childhood and life. This condition is complex and can have many hurdles, but I need you to understand that there is absolutely no reason why your daughter can't have the exact same life as her twin brother." She stood up, glancing down at Gabby's small figure tucked under her husbands arm, the doctor knowing that she was taking in everything being said to her, but could also see how quickly she was getting over whelmed. "Gabby" she asked touching her shoulder, "are you ok?"
The paramedic nodded her head slightly, unable to form any words as everything her doctor had just told her washed over her, the woman struggling to believe and understand what they were being told.
"Ok, well I'll leave you with Dr Madden for a short while and I'll be back soon ok?"
Both the couple nodded their head, the air around them full of sadness.
"Ok so, Transposition of the great arteries is when the two main blood vessels in the heart are swapped, so the pulmonary artery and the aorta are connected to the wrong chambers within the heart. So the pulmonary artery is attached to the left ventricle instead of the right and the aorta is attached to the right ventricle instead of the left. What it means is that where the blood flow around the body usually happens in a figure of eight formation, the oxygenated blood usually flowing around the body from the lungs and around, your daughters heart doesn't do that. Your daughters heart picks up the oxygenated blood from the lungs and then pumps it straight back into the lungs, meaning the rest of the blood in her body is unable to reach the lungs and pick up that all important oxygenated blood." he paused slightly, knowing he was throwing a lot of information their way and also aware that they were probably only absorbing may half of that information. There is a natural opening in babies hearts when they are born called the ductus arteriosus this allows some oxygenated blood to be transferred into the blood flow in the body, however this usually closes shortly after birth, we can do a few things to keep it open, one of these things being something called balloon therapy. We would take your daughter into the operating room and insert a small wire and put a small balloon inside to keep the hole open, that's a situation that would happen if your daughter isn't born with any type of VSD to begin with, usually we wouldn't want her to have a VSD or hole in her heart, but in this case it could actually help her immensely, it would by us sometime before we'd need to operate. And with you having twins there is a high chance that her birth weight will be low. For us to have the best outcome we would want her to be a little bigger before we ideally took her to surgery."
"The surgery, is that... would that be... open heart?" Matt asked, the last words coming out at barely a whisper, the doctor nodding slightly. The expectant fathers heart feeling like it had just been completely crushed in his chest.
"Yes." Dr Madden said, confirming out loud that their baby girl would have to go under the knife. "Now like Dr Manning said, some children make it to one before they need the big surgery, those that are born with a natural VSD usually do a bit better, we don't know why but we can only assume it's because the body, and heart have naturally found a way to work with the defect." The man waited again allowing the couple time to process what he'd just said. "So after your baby is born, she may appear blue in color, don't be alarmed by this, it will be the lack of oxygen in the blood flowing around her body, but between extra oxygen and some medicine we will be able to stabilize her quickly if this happens ok?" He waited for the couple to give him a sign of acknowledgement before continuing on again.
Matt tried his hardest to focus completely on what the doctor was saying but his mind was fogging and he was pretty sure he'd missed almost everything the doctor had said since the mention of surgery. His baby girl would have to have open heart surgery and undergo god knows what else to fix this problem with her heart, all before her first birthday. No child should have to experience that, and although he knew logically that she would have no knowledge or memory of it he knew that he and Gabby always would. He knew that whatever they had dealt with in the past this was going to be the worst thing they had ever had to face together. Their little girl was poorly, really poorly, and there was nothing he could do to make her better, there was nothing either of them could do to protect her from the fate she had to face. If he could have the surgery for her he would, his heart constricting the more he thought about her, her tiny little body going into that cold and sterile OR. He'd take it all away if he could.
"Do you have any questions?" The doctor asked again, his voice cutting through Matt's thoughts. The man blinking back into focus as he looked between him and as wife as he shook his head, he probably did have questions, thousands of them but none that he could form into words right now. The firefighter needing time to process all he had been told, time to talk with his wife and hear how she was. The woman curled next to him still having said not a word since this all started, since the moment she'd assured him she was ok to do this now. The husband wishing more than anything he told the doctors to come back later and let her rest a little.
"Erm... I probably do, but I can't think at the moment. This... all this" he said waving his hand around trying to convey something he couldn't put into words. "It's a lot. I need some time to let this register, we need some time."
"I understand Mr Casey, I'll leave you to it for a little while, let you have some time to let this all sink in and if you have any questions I'll just be outside ok?"
"Thank you." Matt said turning his focus to his wife, the woman staring ahead of her, Casey being able to tell at his first glance that she was completely lost in her own head. The man not even registering the doctors movements as he left the room, pulling the curtain around them as he went, the man wanting the couple to have much privacy as they needed.
"Gabby" Matt spoke gently, tapping his fingers against her shoulder to try and bring her back into the room. Her eyes snapping up to him as the sound of his voice hit her ears. "Did you hear all the doctor said?"
Gabby nodding gently, the woman not daring to say anything in fear that if she did the tears threatening to escape her eyes would start and not stop. Her whole world feeling like it had just come crashing down around her, Matt understanding her silence more than she knew, the man tightening his hold on her while they took comfort from each other. He knew they needed to talk about it, but he also knew she wasn't ready. He could sense it, she didn't need to tell him, he could feel it in the way she was holding her body, and at the speed her heart was beating against his.
The two sat for almost an hour in silence, holding on to each other. The air around them thick with all the feelings and thoughts they were both holding back from saying, the doctors and nurses refraining from entering the room the entire time, something Matt was thankfully for. The last thing either of them needed at the moment was someone trying to talk with them, their entire world had just been crushed, all the excitement and happiness they'd felt for their entire pregnancy ripped away in a cruel and sudden moment. It didn't matter to either of them what condition their little girl had, all they wanted was her to be healthy, and they'd just been told that she wouldn't be, at least not at first. She was going to have a rough start to life but despite everything they'd just been told Matt knew she'd be ok, that they'd be ok, all four of them, that no matter what happened next they were about to become a family of four and they were about to embark on a journey together, a journey that was going to give them lots of twists and turns, a journey that no one knew exactly would happen, or what paths they would take. All he knew was that he had to be strong for his wife and for his babies. They all needed him now more than ever.
"Are you ready?" Matt asked, doing one final sweep of the room.
"I am" Gabby responded from her position on the bed, the woman having been instructed by her husband to sit there while he packed up all their belongings. She'd been discharged half hour ago, the morning quickly turning into afternoon neither of them realizing just how much time had passed before Dr Manning returned to the room. It was now early evening and Gabby was more than ready to be going home. The past week of living in the hospital taking it out of her even before today's news. Something she had been completely ignoring from the moment Dr Manning had come in to discharge her, but despite her avoidance of the subject now it had been something her and Matt had spoken about briefly earlier, well more Matt talking and her listening. But she'd cried a little, and told him she wasn't sure how she felt. It wasn't a lie, the woman having an overwhelming feeling of numbness since hearing what was going on with little Maddie. For now all she could focus on was getting home and seeing all the work her husband and friends had put in around their home, and maybe finally getting the rest of the stuff moved over from the apartment.
"Shall we go then" he asked holding his hand out, Dawson taking it willingly as she moved slowly towards the wheelchair waiting for her, although she thought it was unnecessary she also knew it was the hospitals policy and arguing the point wasn't really worth the argument, there was no way Matt or any of the doctors and nurses were going to let her walk herself out, no matter how much she could protest and honestly she wasn't even sure she had the energy to protest too much. Instead she made her way to the wheelchair, holding on to her blanket and duffel bag as her husband pushed her carefully down the hallways.
So how are we feeling?
I know that probably caught you all off guard and to be honest I toyed with it for a little while, debating if I should or shouldn't go in this direction, but as you all know I like to use some of my personal experiences within my writing , something that made this chapter even harder for me to write as it brought up a lot of emotions, and a lot of memories. But yeah, little Maddie is poorly, she has a heart condition and both Gabby and Matt are struggling with processing it. Gabby more so than Matt. It's been interesting writing this chapter and the next few. It's about to get a little bumpy here soon, but don't worry like always I have my reasons.