Loud In The Cradle: Chapter 11.
We continue on with Lynn Sr and Rita talking about various misapprehensions their children have about life and how it makes their lives worse.
Rita watched her daughters mull over what she'd just said for a while; it did look as if it were starting to sink in but she'd been disappointed on that score so many times before that she felt it necessary to reinforce her argument.
"You didn't like that, did you? You don't like the idea of being a sitcom housewife married to a moron man child when it's actually a possibility, do you? Good thing that television hasn't got much of a bearing on reality…..especially when it's called 'reality' TV!"
Lori didn't like that at all and said "Mother….they literally call it 'reality' televsion so it must be real."
"Yeah, right. That mush you dull your minds with every blasted week is as fabricated as that dime-store rip-off of 'Twilight' you and Leni only like because of the dishy actor who thinks that the creator needs to be carted away to the loony bin. Modeling yourselves off the gidget hopped up on Ritalin spouting nonsense about sci-fi being bad because she has to shoot down a stock social outcast is making your lives worse, not better."
"Listen to your mother, Lori. A lot of the trouble you get in with your own love life seems to be connected to falling in line with the romance comic/soap opera/teen magazine industrial complex. Why, you act as if Bobby here is the only chance you're ever going to have at a husband and family and anything that gets in the way has to be destroyed. It frightens us that you're so dependent on him and we wish we didn't have to worry about hiding the razor blades if his attention ever gets diverted."
"Also, it tends to distort the things he does say. It's how 'Hey! Tell your punk-ass bitch kid brother to stop picking on my baby sister' got turned into 'If he doesn't marry my kid sister, you can die alone because the engagement is off!'"
"I do not think that!"
"You coulda fooled me! You acted as if he had to be mauled half to death for canceling your destiny or something. It's like you channel dead crazy people!"
Lynn Sr then turned to Bobby and said "Oh….by the way, you hate girls who know about video games and comics and would find that a deal breaker."
"I do?"
"Y'do now. Isn't it nice that your thinking is done for you?"
"Hah-hah-hah-hah. Very funny, Daddy. Did the twerp tell you that to make you feel sorry for him or something?"
"No. I'd figured that out on my own. Also, lose the 'twerp' jazz stat. Once he starts to tower over you pygmies in about five years or so, it isn't going to fit at all. I mean, look at old pictures of your grandfather from the fifties. He used to look just like Lincoln and now, he's taller than you girls are ever going to be. Mind you, he might be thinner than my father-in-law is but it's like how Lucy will probably end up' with her mother's physique instead of her great aunt's. I know that's a downer because she wanted to be Morticia Addams when she grew up but life just ain't fair. That's why the only thing you kids can remember is when someone else let you down, made a mess of things and humiliated HIMSELF."