The beginning of existence

"Beauty measures as much as one's mind can comprehend, then as much as comprehension translates to affection ... influence over one's sensibility and finally as much as the affection .. the influence can permenantly last, carving itself in one's soul. And so respectively ,there is beauty that one simply approves of, beauty that one loves & admires and beauty that one's soul obsesses over, driving them to insanity and beyond"*

Naraku mused as he sat by the Shouji door overlooking the gardens. He left it slightly ajar so he could see the sky outside.

His eyes travelled between the moon and the prisoner huddled in a futon in his room.

He eclipsed most of the moonlight but somehow, a bundle of light could still seep through, partially illuminating her face and she looked angelic, mesmerising to say the least. However, he had to turn his gaze away from her, he wasn't giving her that effect over him, not anymore ...

"Kikyo Has Fallen" Kanna barged in "She has plummeted to the ground"

He was transfixed ... everything stopped to make sense , it took him a moment to pull everything together again.

He should run to her, he knows that .. this is what his heart .. no .. his entire being wants him to do.

But He is good at holding back.

"Call onto the castle's healer .. and tell him to come to her prison cell, immediately"

He makes his way to her cell, his pace getting faster every footstep he takes

He hoped she is simply faking it, a ploy to get out of there ...but no, this isn't Kikyo, Kikyo doesn't think this way, doesn't lower herself to this, she doesn't know how to swallow a speckle of her pride ... then it is worse, she is really ill and .. He doesn't want to think what does it mean.

There was vomitus on the floor, and her clothes were spoilt with various all kinds of body fluids ... her hair clung to her forehead ... she was perspirating and everything smelled terrible.

He didn't care.

He carried her to his room. and informed his guard to instruct Kanna and the healer to make a detour.

It ended up being a mixture of undernutrition, fatigue and as Kanna phrased it: Other circumstantial conditions.

"You will need to leave until we help her clean up and change"

Kanna made sure Kikyo was well tended to, providing assisstance and clothes

"Feeling better?"

"I feel like sleeping"

"He wants to know if you will eat anything"

Kikyo shuddered at the mention of food

"I can't stand anything in my stomach right now."

And so he let her sleep, peaking through every once in a while, Kikyo was whimpering, She was in pain and he knew better to stay away.

She was starting to wake up, he felt.

Kikyo slowly opened her eyes .. it was dark, night has come and now that she felt better, she started to work through what happened the entire day, this room she has been transfered to..

"You are finally awake"

She tried to sit up, but she felt dizzy, she almost gave out again

"Steady"

He moved stealthly, sitting behind her so she doesn't fall back.

"There is water beside you. Can you reach out to grab it without spillling it down?"

She tried, she grabbed the water and held onto it but she realised her hands weren't steady enough, it nearly slipped.

"Here" his hand extended to support the base of the cup she held, moving along as her hands moved, until finally she could bring the brim of the cup to her lips.

Their position was awkward, with her leaning on him and he supporting her in an embrace ... not in his wildest fantasies did he imagine them like that, her head onto his chest; his almost leaning on her shoulder,he could almost bow his head to whisper into her ears.

Lovers' embrace

And He realised, he doesn't want to move.

She must have realised so as well, because she was starting to fidget .. and he almost laughed at himself, what an idiot he was just to think she would let him live the end of his fantasy ..

"Easy"

They put down the cup, then he started to move slowly, giving her room to gradually lay back.

"What do you want to eat?"

"I don't want to .."

"I wasn't asking your opinion, Kikyo. You will eat whether you like it or not ... In short, Kikyo, I will not let you starve yourself to death. Nobody kills you but me."

He settled on soup.

Kikyo crawled her way to the nearest support, determined not to let him hold her again like that.

"Eat or I will spoon feed you the soup"

The entire scene was pure irony to both their faces. It was almost intimate.

"Pretend it is Inuyasha you are sitting with .. it might make it a little more palatable, a little more appealing."

Kikyo didn't know if he was mocking her or speaking sincerely.

She slowly drank her soup, staring intently at the man before her, a lean man who lets his hair down probably to cover the burn marks on his neck .. a handsome man who has a softness to his face that doesn't match the callousness of his soul. Yes, softness .. not reverence like Sesshomaru, nor jubilance like Inuyasha.

"What?" he raised his brow, amusement evident on his face

He puzzles her, she wants to say ... she heard him pining from behind the door a few nights ago and ...

She loathes him but she wants to understand.

'He is manipulating me' she thinks but still ... she wants to be sure.

"What is it that you are after, Naraku?"

"That is it then, the reason you have been staring at me like you want to undo me"

"You didn't answer the question."
"Power, Kikyo. I am only ever after power and territory."

"And where do I stand in this plan of yours to obtain power and territory? What is my value in your game?"

"You are an expensive hostage"

He intended to offend her. But for once she didn't seem convinced of his utter hatred of her. Instead, she stared him in the eyes searching them thoroughly for ... everything.

Then she laughed

"Of course, I am."

She put down her empty bowl. This night, this conversation had to end here.

She was feeling drowsy anyway. Her eyes were drooping.

"You should get back to sleep"

"I ..."

She crawls back to the futon and closes her eyes. She doesn't feel safe nor does she feel comfortable in his presence .. but she couldn't fight sleep anymore.

He stays until she sleeps. He knows she doesn't want him to but it is the incessant part in him that wants to prove his power, his control over his heart ... this part that strives to prove she means nothing to him keeps him in there or that is the lie he tells himself .. the lie that covers up for his hopelessness.

Everybody expected her to behave like Kikyo and she hated it.

Because she was Kagome, not Kikyo.

She hated how Kikyo's name was on the tip of everybody's tongue once they see her, she hated the whispers ... the looks ...and mostly she hated how the stupid Inuyasha wouldn't look at her.

Sesshomaru decided to keep the idiot busy, meaning he was in charge of showing her around the capital and now she was stuck with the pathetic man and his perverted companion as they rode around town.

Miroku, she learnt, had a thing for Sango and Sango being her classical brooding self wanted nothing to do with him until Kohaku is back and he proves that he has changed.

And honestly, nobody could blame her. Miroku, despite his exceptional rationale and his courage, was a hopeless case of ladies' man. He couldn't pass a female by without harrassing her and at this rate, they wouldn't last one day before Sango kills him and deposes of the body.

Inuyasha doesn't speak to her and she should be content but ...

"So, You avoid looking at me because I resemble her, right?"

Inuyasha feigns surprise

"What are you talking about?"

"You .. I am talking about you and why you purposely avoid looking at me as we speak"

"It is propiety"

"No, Inuyasha. In your case it isn't. Plus, you are the friend of Miroku san and that speaks volumes"

She indignantly strode past him, causing him to mutter something about 'Annoying, temperamental'

"I like her"

"Huh?"

"Kagome-chan, I like her .. she is interesting. She isn't too serious for her own good like Kikyo"

Kaede is the most sympathetic.

She is the only one who doesn't see her as a pale imitation of Kikyo. Early on, the resemblence might have facilitated their friendship but later Kaede drew the line. This was Kagome, not Kikyo.

It may have helped that she knew Kikyo better than anyone.

"You share some qualities together. But that is the case for most people. She has empathy as her most prominent trait but for you .. it is loyalty."

The room was bleak.

Now that daylight is shining through the Shouji she could see the room well.

He just keeps a futon and the rest of the room is empty. She doubted it was due to personal taste rather than lack of resources.

Naraku

Kikyo was still trying to dismantle him, He wasn't a simple man who wears his heart on his sleeve like Inuyasha nor was he simply guarded like Sesshomaru. This man was damaged.

He has been damaged for a very long time, even before they first met and ...

Kanna came in.

"Breakfast"

"Thank you"

Before she could leave Kikyo decided to try something

"Kanna, please stay. I need to talk to you"

"What is it that you want to talk about?"

"Your brother."

*Translated quote written by Elrafie