Author's note: I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while. I don't seem to be getting much interest on here so I've been hesitant to upload. I will upload the rest though, for those who are enjoying it.
Mac wasn't sure how long he lay, tied, beaten and shivering on the floor but it was long enough, he was conscious of every small sound, waiting for the door to open. He flinched when it did, tensing his muscles, hoping there wasn't going to be any more pain. There was movement around him and then his father was rubbing something over him, not being gentle, causing him as much pain as the hits, he whimpered, he's not ashamed to admit.
Whatever it was it was rubbed over every inch, he tried to shy away when it was moved over his private area but there was nowhere to move too. Lastly the thing, which he now realised was a towel was being rubbed over his face and hair. Mac wanted so badly to speak, it was killing him not to, tell his father to stop, to let him go, he knew that he couldn't, that would probably just lead to more pain.
Soon his father stepped away and he felt his ankles released from where they were secured, he then felt the humiliation of his boxers being pulled on. His wrists soon followed, and he was pulled to his feet, his hands immediately wrenched behind him. His heart was beating fast again, he was also panting because of the pain.
There were no words as James dragged him from the room, he had to keep up or he probably would have been pulled along the floor, he had no idea where they were going or what was happening, soon they stopped and he was pushed onto something. As he was trying to figure it out, a gag was roughly fitted in his mouth, he cried out, he was sure his lips were bleeding again and then his legs were secured and he had a feeling he knew where he was. The feeling became fact as a needle was pressed into his neck and headphones were fitted over his head.
He couldn't believe this was happening, he didn't think he could take anymore at this point.
He was already feeling disoriented and confused, he was in pain and his head was fuzzy from the blows he received, now his head fell to his chest as the drugs took hold. The words began and he listened.
By the time, the second tape was over he was broken, he couldn't take anymore and if his father told him to jump off a bridge he would do it. The headphones were removed, but the pain didn't stop, the door was closed and locked, and Mac remembered the hour after. Silent tears were falling down his cheeks, he could hardly hold himself up, he was sure the metal cuffs around his wrists were cutting into his skin. He wouldn't go through that again, he had to do whatever his father wanted and hopefully his life would get better living here.
The door opened and his gag was removed, he was so dizzy he wasn't sure he could answer any questions.
"You will answer the questions I ask without hesitation. What were the words on the first tape?" This was the first thing his father had said to him in a long time.
"I will behave, or I will be punished."
"What were the words of the second tape?"
"I will not try to leave or there will be consequences."
"What did you learn from the two tapes?"
"I will behave, or I'll be punished and if I try to leave there will be consequences."
"What did you learn from the two tapes?"
Mac groaned, he was hurting why couldn't this be over, there was a brief slap to his face and his father repeated the words.
"I will behave, or I'll be punished and if I try to leave there will be consequences."
"Again."
"I will behave, or I'll be punished and if I try to leave there will be consequences."
James had him repeat the phrase three more times before he stopped.
"Good Angus, I think we've finally got there."
Mac's head stayed against his chest as his father released his legs and removed his wrists from their attachment, he would have fallen straight to the floor if there wasn't a strong grip on his arm.
"I'll let you rest and then we'll get you cleaned up," James said, pulling him out of the room.
Mac was dragging his feet, he wasn't sure why his father didn't take off the blindfold, maybe he would walk a little better. They walked back the way they'd come, and Mac was sure they went back into the room they'd left, Mac tensed as he was pulled in, this room did not have pleasant memories. James pushed Mac down to the floor, pulling his wrist cuffs apart and lying him down onto his back. "No" Mac said, not being able to help himself.
His father ignored him re attaching the wrist cuffs and then pulling his arms to secure them like before. Mac started struggling, knowing he shouldn't but instinct taking over, he moved his legs maybe he could kick them out, a fist to his stomach stopped him in his tracks and his ankles were soon secured like his wrists again.
"That was very stupid Angus, we'll talk about consequences later."
His father got up and walked away, Mac hearing the door close and lock. He was once again shaking, although at least this time he was dry, and he was kicking himself for struggling. So much for being broken. Why couldn't he just behave, maybe there was something wrong with him.
Mac lay still, breathing slowly, trying to not make the pain in his ribs worse, the drugs had finally worn off and his head was a bit clearer. He was going through everything that had just happened, knowing now that it was a technique that was used to break prisoners. You disorientate them, blindfold them and tie them down, you then torment them, they can't see you or hear you, (if you're quiet enough), the loud noises, the beating, even the water, it was all something his father learnt in the CIA. He imagined putting him straight in a room with the tapes was meant to make the technique worse, he was already starting to break, then torture him some more.
Mac turned his head as the door opened.
"Let's get you fixed up Angus," he heard his father say.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have struggled," Mac said immediately, if he was broken he should act it.
"We'll talk about that later." James said. "I'm gonna check your ribs."
Mac felt his father's hands run along his ribs, he flinched and whimpered, the pain was back, and his father wasn't being gentle. He felt fingers probing both sides of his abdomen, reaching behind his back to check for injury there.
"Nothing's broken, although there could be a crack in a rib or two, I'll keep an eye on them, these bruises will be painful for a while, I'll put some ice on them while I check out the rest of you." Mac gasped when the cold pack touched his skin, he still couldn't see so he didn't expect it. "I'm gonna take this blindfold off now while I check your face."
The blindfold slid up to above his head and Mac kept his eyes closed, knowing that it would be hard to see for a while. His father moved his head to the side and prodded the bruises on his face, feeling his head to make sure there weren't any bumps. "Open your eyes." Mac did and thankfully it wasn't too bright, James pulled on each upper lid to check the pupils for concussion, looking satisfied he went to check Mac's wrists and ankles.
"The bruises on your face will heal, the cuts on your lips will need a bit of ice on them, we'll do that later, but they should be fine. There are some superficial cuts on your wrists that'll heal on their own. Overall, it wasn't too bad of a beating, as long as you don't get another one soon there shouldn't be any problems."
Mac couldn't believe his father had just said that so calmly, oh it wasn't a bad beating son, be a man and take it. If you don't get another one soon. As if that might happen? If his father didn't want any problems then the best way was to stop hurting him. Obviously, Mac didn't say any of this out loud, he just lay there, keeping quiet.
His father looked at his watch, "It's a little early for dinner and you should rest some more, let the ice do its job. Here's some water before I go." James leaned over and pulled Mac's head up letting him finish the bottle.
Mac squirmed, knowing that the water helped his throat but wasn't helping his fall bladder, he had almost wet himself earlier when James had punched him in the stomach and now he was ready to burst.
"Do you need to go Angus," his father asked, a bit like he was a small child on a road trip.
Mac nodded, not sure if he should speak, hoping that his father would let him up to use the bathroom. Instead he started pulling his boxers down, bringing the bottle up. Mac felt even more humiliated when James held the bottle ready.
"It's either this or you wet yourself, and I'm not cleaning up if you do."
Mac closed his eyes and let himself go, feeling not seeing his father pull his boxers back on. Because his eyes were closed he didn't see James reach for the blindfold that had been pushed off, securing it back around his head. Mac shook his head, wanting it off, he hated not being able to see.
"Be still Angus, when you're in this room the blindfold stays on, it's all part of the process. Now I'll come back later, and you can have some food. Then we can talk about what happened when I brought you back in here earlier."
Mac swallowed hard; he thought his father had forgotten about that. He once again was left alone, the ice making the bruises more bearable and his throat feeling better after the water. He really hoped that the evening went better than the day, praying that his father gave him sedatives instead of tying him up again. He was getting sick of this, unfortunately it seemed it was going to be a regular thing, he would just have to get used to it.
Mac had almost dozed off when James came back into the room, he felt his presence before the ice packs were removed and then his ankles and wrists were released, he was pulled to his feet, wincing when his ribs protested. His father removed the blindfold and handed Mac his clothes, telling him to put them on. He didn't need telling twice, he was starting to get cold, the ice hadn't helped.
The same process as usual happened, his hands were fastened and he was led into the kitchen, being secured at the table quicker than he thought possible. James brought over a small bowl of soup and a piece of toast, with another bottle of water. "Eat"
Mac dug in, he hadn't eaten since breakfast and he was hungry, he looked up as his father sat down with a much larger plate of food. He guessed he should be lucky James was feeding him at all.
They once again sat in silence, James ignoring Mac as he winced each time the soup hit his lip or when he stretched for the bottle of water. Mac finished first so he sat quietly, his eyes down at the table, he didn't want a repeat of the last dinner conversation.
Once James had finished and cleared away the dishes, he sat back down and spoke.
"Let's talk about the struggling and the talking back at me."
Mac looked up, a scared look on his face, he hoped it was a better one for his father than defiance.
"It was unacceptable Angus, especially after just listening to those tapes. And if that weren't bad enough, you tried to stop me putting your blindfold back on after I'd just treated your injuries." James paused and Mac wasn't sure if he should speak. "What do you have to say for yourself?"
"I'm sorry, the struggling was instinct to someone holding me down. And I don't like not being able to see."
Mac knew the first answer might be acceptable, his father knew what being an agent meant, if you get caught you fight. He didn't think he'd like the second answer though.
"I see. I understand the instinct Angus, I have it myself and if someone other the me tries to hurt you then you should fight, but you need to relax when it's me, I'm only doing it to help you and you need to let me. I'll let that slide this time, but I won't again. As for not liking that you aren't able to see, frankly I don't care. We've had this with being gagged, you don't like it so you don't think I should do it, we also had this conversation. Because of that there will be consequences."
Mac looked up, not liking that. He was glad that his father had let the first thing slide, although him saying that he was hurting him to help him was a bit much to take.
"I don't want to keep punishing you, I don't like hurting you son. Some of it is necessary like I said and I think after that last session we got somewhere, I really think you believed the words on those tapes and I think you know that you have to behave. I'm hopeful that there won't be any more trying to leave, although I'll have to play those tapes a few more times I think for it to really get taken out of your mind. The problem is that I think we're getting somewhere and then something happens, if something happens I punish you and there seems to be a vicious circle. That needs to stop."
Mac nodded; he didn't completely agree of course but he had to seem like he did. He didn't relish listening to the tapes again, although maybe it would just be the second tape and not the first next time.
"I think we need to try some form of exposure therapy," James said.
Mac was unsure what he meant by that, of course he knew what the actual meaning was, but he wasn't trying to get over an anxiety issue or fear. Or was he, I suppose in his father's mind he was.
"I'll use the blindfold and the gag as much as possible over the next few days, get you used to them. That should stop you reacting when I have use them. It will be like another item of clothing, just something that you put on every so often."
His father made it sound so simple, as if having to wear them more was going to help, it would just make Mac hate them, he would never get used to it. Of course, he couldn't tell James this.
"Now that we've dealt with that I need to decide what to do with you tonight," James said, standing up. He went to the freezer and took out some ice, wrapping it in a tea towel and handing it to Mac. "Put that on your lips, I don't want those splits getting worse.
Mac took the ice and it felt good against his face, the soup had stung his cuts every time he'd taken a mouthful. He sat quietly waiting for his father to speak again. He couldn't believe it, but he was hoping he was going to be sedated.
"I'm not sure I should risk using sedatives tonight, you'll need some for tomorrow's tapes and I probably shouldn't drug you too much with your ribs the way they are. I'll compromise and give you some painkillers and secure you with loose restraints. Angus, know that if you so much as make a sound of complaint or you remove any of the restraints there will be trouble, more than there was last night."
"I understand," Mac said, he didn't want a repeat of that.
James nodded and went to get some painkillers, he had Mac take them and finish the bottle of water, he then took away the ice and removed his restraints. They walked down to the basement, James once again picking up his bag.
"Use the bucket, then sit down," his father said, taking things out of the bag.
Why did his father have to watch him urinate all the time, Mac thought, knowing that was the least of his problems. He sat down where his father said, getting ready for what was going to happen. James attached his ankle cuffs once more and then attached them to the chain already in the basement, he then asked Mac to put his hands behind his back, it wasn't comfortable but he did it, feeling them get secured together.
"I'm going to leave them just together tonight so you can move around a little, but I will be putting on a gag and that's non-negotiable, I won't tie it too tight because of the cuts it made the last time, but it will be going on."
He took the material out of the bag and manoeuvred it past Mac's lips, pulling it gently around his head and tying it. Mac winced when it brushed against the cuts.
"It's as tight as I'm happy with, hopefully the cuts won't re-open. Now I was going to have you wear a blindfold too, start the therapy but I've decided to leave that until tomorrow."
James got up and Mac laid down, glad he wasn't being blindfolded again, he tried to get comfortable, not an easy thing to do on a hard floor with your hands behind your back.
"Goodnight Angus, I really hope I won't have to come down here again tonight, remember I'll be watching through the camera." Mac had been warned and he would listen.