So I just remembered something a comment on my first story on Ao3 about who would be doing the wildlife documentary style commenting about Nico and Will during the scene on the hill and I had to write something based on it. This takes place after the BoO and before ToA

(In other words, enjoy this completely useless crackhead energy fic that I wrote.)

This story is also posted on Ao3 under the same username.

Enjoy! :)

- alltheglowingeyes

"Are you rolling?"

"Uh, the thingy is flashing, so probably."

"Gods, who let Percy film? Cecil, take over."

"Hey, no-"

"Percy, give the camera for Cecil to film, you spork," Piper insisted, lacing her words with a little charmspeak to give the son of Poseidon the encouragement he needed to give up his job.

Once he realized what happened, Percy pouted. "Fine, but I'm co-anchoring with Lou then."

Lou Ellen rolled her eyes, "I don't do co-anchors. This is my documentary, and you, Austin and Pipes will be my glamorous assistants," she paused to think for a moment. "Actually, Kay, you can be my co-anchor. The rest of you just roll with it."

Piper, Austin and Percy looked ready to start protesting, but Cecil cleared his throat, "Um, guys? You do know we're actually filming this?"

Immediately all of them snapped their attention back to the camera and the subject that they were filming. Kayla nodded, "Right, well before we jump right in, I got us hats to make it feel more professional," she said. The daughter of Apollo produced a plastic bag from behind her and pulled out six identical explorer-styled hats, all a shade of muted green with the phrase "S.S.S.S" on the front of them in rainbow plastic gems

"S.S.S.S. is for the Secret Solangelo Shippers Society. Neat huh?" said Kayla, a grin on her face. The other demigods shared her enthusiasm, grabbing a hat for themselves and admiring each other's new looks.

Finally, Austin clapped his hands together. "Okay, I think we should probably tell the future viewers what this documentary is for."

Lou Ellen nodded, turning to face the camera, "Good idea. Welcome, Solangelo Shippers, to the Official Solangelo Documentary. I'm Lou Ellen, and this documentary is directed by me, starring me, sponsored by me, and filmed by Cecil, I guess. Oh, and Percy, Austin, Kayla and Piper are here too."

Piper whacked Lou Ellen's arm playfully, before turning to the camera herself. "We have reliable intel from a source who would like to remain anonymous - hi Jason - that Solangelo is currently on a date at the lake. Solangelo, in case you didn't know, is in reference to the couple formed by Nico di Angelo, son of Hades and Will Solace, son of Apollo. We have tracked them all the way out here, and are most likely mere steps away from the happy couple."

Kayla nodded, cutting in, "We have to be careful, though, because If they catch sight of us, well… Nico's scary and Will is the only medic who can heal us if Austin and I are incapacitated so uh..." She trailed off, wondering to herself if this was really worth it.

Percy placed a hand on her shoulder, taking over. "We are literally risking our lives for this content, so please keep watching. Nico and Will, if you are watching this please don't kill us. If we do die, please make sure that our film sees the light of day." Percy proclaimed, wiping a fake tear away.

Austin mumbled something about stupid dramatic sons of Poseidon trying to scare us away before jumping in front of the other demigods, ignoring their protests as he blocked their shot. "Let's get going then!"

The demigods trekked forwards through the shrubs near the lake for a few minutes, moving as silently as possible. Finally, Piper stopped them, shushing the already silent demigods.

Percy pulled out a pair of binoculars from the bag on his back, examining the beach in front of them as they hid behind the shrubs. Sure enough, as he checked through his binoculars, he saw Will and Nico sitting on the pier, chatting and playfully shoving at each other every once in a while. They were pretty close to the demigods hiding space that Percy didn't need the binoculars, but Percy liked his spy gear too much to put it away.

Lou Ellen, unable to see anything from where she was, tapped Percy's shoulder impatiently, "Well? What do you see?"

Cecil proceeded to switch between filming the demigods commentary and Will and Nico on the pier The Office mockumentary style.

"Ok, ok. They're shoulder to shoulder and chatting away. On a cuteness scale of one to ten I would say they are like a twenty three."

"I see them, oh my gods. They look so sweet."

"Wait, wait, wait. I want this to be a nature documentary. Austin, do a David Attenborough impression!"

"Oh, ah shit. Is that like a nature dude? Hang on," Austin cleared his throat, before pulling out the world's worst accent. "Here we have- or no. Uh, in front of the camera, one can see a wild Nico di Angelo with his, uh, his mate? Wait, that sounds so weird. His partner, a wild Will Solace. They are-"

"Holy Hephaestus Austin, do you even know what a nature documentary is? Ok, change of plans, let's just continue with the commentary."

After this decision was made, the commentary flowed much more naturally. The group of demigods did their best to keep their voices down as Cecil filmed in silence, occasionally suppressing a snort behind the camera.

"Just look at them. They're so… wholesome."

"Disgusting. They are the cutest thing I have ever seen."

"Oh, oh! I think Solace is going in for some hand holding action."

"Yes, get it, my dearest brother from an actual other mother."

"What a man's man, am I right? Austin, you could pick up some moves from him."

"Hey! I've got plenty of moves, you di-"

"Wait, shut up! They're all cuddly now and I'm going to throw up from how sickeningly cute they are."

"Aww… Nico's going red. I can't believe our child is growing up so fast."

"Excuse you, he's my child. Annabeth and I have laid claim to him before you guys even knew who he was."

"Actually, Jason said that you offered shared custody with him, so he's also my child."

"Stop making things weird. This is a professional documentary and you guys are killing the vibes."

"Wait, they're getting all whispery. This is so precious that I might start weeping."

"I wrote them a haiku:

Brother and his boy

So cute they make Lou Lou cry

I am so lonely"

"No one cares, Austin."

"Gods of Olympus, this is utter filth. I love them so much."

"Uh guys, you know we can hear you?"

Immediately, the group shut up, eyes wide. Nico and Will both turned, facing the shrubs. Nico's face was completely flushed, and the tips of Will's ear were red, but Will still calmly beckoned for the demigods to come out of their hiding place. Cecil, sensing what was to come, immediately elbowed Lou Ellen. The daughter of Hecate understood, concentrating some Mist around the camera in hopes that the couple wouldn't notice it. As they stepped out from the shrubs, Lou Ellen gave the two demigods a cocky smile, moving to the front of the group.

"I repeat: this is so cute that I can only call it utter filth, and as one of the Camp's biggest gossips it is my solemn duty to make sure that I - along with my trusty crew - comment on your behaviours," the daughter of Hecate quipped, the smirk on her face growing.

Kayla frowned, "Hang on, what do you mean crew? We established I'm your co-anchor, and if you try to retract your decision I will shove an arrow in your left eye socket," the daughter of Apollo protested, as the two began to bicker over their partnership.

Will frowned, "What do you guys need a crew for? And anchors? Also, what in Hades are those hats for?"

Immediately Kayla and Lou Ellen winced, realizing their mistake. Piper looked like she was about to punt them into the lake, Austin and Percy were trying their best to look ashamed, and Cecil seemed ready to break into a run.

Luckily, they were saved by none other than Nico. Having finally overcome his original embarrassment from the commentary, he shot each of the seven demigods personalized death glares. "Come on, Solace. We aren't going to get any peace with these dimwits around us."

The other nodded enthusiastically at the couple to head off, watching as Nico dragged a bemused looking Will away to most likely go seclude themselves in the Hades Cabin.

As soon as the couple was out of sight, Cecil turned to the other demigods. "I don't think they noticed! The Mist seemed to have worked," he pronounced proudly, bringing the camera into view. The demigods all grinned, as Kayla quickly stepped next to the son of Hermes.

"Let's see the footage! Do you think we have enough for the documentary?" she asked, peeking at the camera in Cecil's hands. He shrugged, clicking some buttons on the camera before grinning.

"I think it'll be enough. This is going to be the best thing ever, a relic for future campers," Cecil announced.

Percy snickered, "Who needs an orientation film? You think Chiron will let us swap this for it?"

Piper just laughed, "Bold of you to assume we need permission. Now come on! Let's edit the damn thing."

Needless to say, a week later when the seven demigods held an official Secret Solangelo Shippers Society screening in the Apollo Cabin for all campers, the documentary received great praise. However, the demigods who created the masterpiece weren't there to see it, as they remained in hiding from a seething son of Hades and a homicidal son of Apollo.

A/N: So I might add more chapters of just dumb little snapshots of this, er, concept? IDK. If you have any feedback/prompts for this or other things you would want me to try and write, leave a comment!

Also I generally just love the idea of all of these guys having a mutual bond over Solangelo and being waaaaaaay too involved in the relationship.