I do not own Shaman King.
The sea reminded her of home, or at least what she had considered a home as a child. It was soothing, she remembers the excitement of waking up to a high tide, going down the many steps that would lead her to her only friend as fast as she could whenever she felt overwhelmed by her many responsibilities. The ocean didn't ask anything of her, unlike many of the others in her life. It just listened. Sometimes it caressed her feet while she told it all about her insecurities and her many questions regarding her mission in this life. She came to love the ocean like a child loves her grandmother.
From a very young age, she learned that nature is closely linked with mentality. She knows a walk in the woods can calm her anxiety, and she began to love taking time to pot plants and look after them to keep her mind occupied from sorrow. Those things have stayed with her throughout her life.
As she grew older, she found peace in her torture. It was difficult for her, back then, to imagine a better place to explore her thoughts than inside that thorny casket. She took on her mission as gracefully as she could and, with time, the smell of blood fit her like a cologne.
Sometimes she could still taste it, the fresh blood in her mouth, the irony taste and the sweetness that comes with it. She was genuinely afraid of falling into old habits with this new life that was given to her, a life filled with so many beautiful things to be grateful for she felt guilty at times, but she's learned to push those intrusive thoughts away. She'd focus on her new home instead.
Her home is somewhere else now, far from the secluded island she grew up in, far from ducking stools and stocks, far from fighting and death. Her home is wherever her beautiful son would laugh and play, her home was in the arms of her beloved.
With the weight of the world no longer resting on her shoulders (it never did), she's grown to learn her suffering isn't a synonym of happiness for others, she's learned to cherish all the colours in between her former black and white world.
Now whenever she smiles, she knows Men feels better, and whenever she laughs it's like music to Ren's ears, so she's made it her new mission to be happy, so others around her can share her joy.
Oh wow, the fluff is very strong in this one.
Once again, thank you so much for reading. It means a lot to me. Please let me know what you think!