And the Clouds Parted

by FlowerOwl

To Midna, the world is a set of dichotomies, divided into the Twilight Realm, a world relegated to the shadows and history, and Hyrule, a world where the sun is reflected by the glint of weaponry. The world is divided into twos, but as the princess of Hyrule enters into her life, bringing the harsh sun along, the lines between them begin to blur.

13. Chapter 13

Things changed. Midna had not fully realised what her conversation with Zelda would mean for her, some part of her almost feeling like it refused to believe that it had been real, that it was not just something she had imagined, an attempt at cheering herself up, but by the time she went back to her cabin the day after she had once more felt the warmth of Zelda's smile, sitting down to eat her dinner alone—the meal consisting of some kind of mush that tasted like nothing at all, a reminder of how she had used what little resources they had left to use on her for the cake—only for someone to knock on her door, she was once more reminded of what had happened. For unlike everything she had ever known, it was neither Link nor Ilia who opened the door when she called for the person to enter. No, it was Zelda.

Standing there in the doorway, with her own plate held out in front of her as she hesitated for a moment, clearly unsure of just what to do, Zelda looked almost as out of place as Midna had felt the day before, back when she had found herself with no other choice than to head into the rooms below deck. And maybe that, the fact that she could see herself in the way Zelda shifted her weight from one side to another, was the reason for why she did not hesitate to gesture towards the chair next to her bed, walking over to pull it closer to her desk before looking back at Zelda.

"Do you want to sit down?" she asked, hoping that she had not misjudged Zelda's intentions. It seemed unlikely that she had, with Zelda having come here with her dinner, but it did not keep her from holding her breath as she waited for the answer.

Thankfully, she did not have to wait for long, Zelda immediately moving over to sit down next to her. "Yes, thank you." the plate clattered against the wooden desk as Zelda set it down.

Waiting another moment, hoping that Zelda would tell her the reason for why she had come there, only for it to become apparent that it would not happen, not right now at least, Midna gestured towards her. "So… what brings you here? Did you want to talk about anything?"

"No," Zelda mumbled. Was Midna imagining things or was Zelda trying to avoid her gaze? It felt like that was the case although she could not see the reasons for it, "I just thought that maybe you would like some company. I noticed that you always left the dining hall during mealtimes, so I thought that you might be lonely, seeing as you are always all alone in here when you eat." finally, Zelda looked back up at her, all thoughts about her meal clearly abandoned for a moment as she waited for a response.

"Oh." Midna tried her best to make sure that her expression would not give away the surprise at that explanation. Maybe she had thought about the fact that it would be nice to have someone to talk with once or twice, the chance to not be alone while still not having to stay in the crowded dining hall with everyone else, but that did not mean that Zelda had to move away from it as well, not when Midna had seen her talk with everyone sitting at the table with her the few times she had been forced to head to the dining hall during mealtimes. "Uh, are you sure that you want to?" realising how it might have sounded to Zelda, Midna hurried to add. "I mean, from what I have seen, you like talking to people while you eat and—"

"That will not be a problem at all," Zelda said, interrupting her, "I can be quiet if you want me to. We don't have to talk at all; I just thought that it must be lonely for you to always go back here to eat."

"No, you misunderstood me. I meant that from what I have seen, you seem to like eating in the dining hall together with everyone else. Are you sure you would not rather go back there to eat with them again? Because I would understand it if that was the case—I am not exactly the nicest person to be around."

But Zelda just shrugged, almost like she did not care about any of that. "I think we will have to disagree on that. Or, well," a tiny smile made its way to her lips, the sparkle in her eyes returning, "maybe you are right. There are definitely people here who are nicer than you, but I did not come here to talk about them with you. I came to ask you if you would mind me keeping you company for a while, just during mealtimes." as Midna opened her mouth to answer, Zelda held up her hand. "No, wait, please don't answer just yet. I wanted to make sure that you were all right, so if you don't want to talk at all, I can understand that. We don't have to talk with one another; I just want to make sure that you are not alone."

The thought that perhaps Ilia had asked her to do this, wanting to make sure that Midna did not remain completely alone while she was busy trying to make Link come back to them crossed her mind, but Midna did her best not to dwell on it. Although it felt probable, especially considering the fact that Ilia had been the one to ask her to go talk with Zelda, for some reason, she preferred to think that Zelda had made the decision to visit her herself, the choice being completely separate from the fact that Midna had barely got the chance to exchange more than a couple of words with Ilia since she had opened her door to find her standing outside the cabin, telling her to apologise to Zelda and talk to Link. It felt like it had been ages ago, rather it really just being separated from the present by a little over a week, and as much as Midna did not like admitting it, she knew that the promise between her and Zelda to make a fresh start must have been at least part of why that was the case.

The realisation that Zelda was waiting for a response, looking down at her, the look in her eyes growing more and more uncertain with each passing second, was what forced Midna to return to the moment, barely able to keep herself from nodding so quickly that it would have sent her hair flying around her face. "If you really mean that, then I would love if you would stay here. But, just…" she paused, already sure that she would come to regret her next words within a week, perhaps even before that, and yet, she could not stop herself, "you don't have to be quiet, you know. I won't mind the two of us getting the chance to talk with each other for a bit." seeing the way Zelda's eyes widened in surprise, she hurried to add. "As long as you don't mind either, I mean."

"I don't mind at all." there was something almost undefinable about the way Zelda said the words, almost like it had been what Midna had been waiting for since the first time she had realised that, as annoying as she had been, she preferred talking to her over the two of them passing by each other in the corridors, Zelda walking past her without a second glance. Maybe that was why Midna did not find it difficult at all to return the brilliant smile Zelda sent her as she continued, pulling the chair a bit closer to her. "I had actually hoped that you might say something like that."

She tried to respond, but all that came out was a surprised sound, Midna struggling to make sense of her thoughts. Finally, regaining the power of speech, she settled for simply nodding at her, mumbling the words to save herself in case she let something slip out that she would have preferred to remain unsaid. "Well, in that case, feel welcome to come in here whenever you like—during mealtimes, I mean."

"Sure." picking up her fork, Zelda looked almost like she decided to disregard the last part of the sentence, but then she smiled at her. "In that case, expect me to be here for breakfast tomorrow as well."

It sounded like a joke, and Midna was sure that that was what it was, Zelda's way of trying to put as much distance between the two of them and the reason for why they had not spoken to one another for weeks. But that did not keep her from wishing that she might have meant it. Eating alone in her cabin had felt like the better alternative, something she preferred to having to sit in the dining room where it would be even easier for Jaggle to come over to her to tell her what she already knew about how the situation with the larder called for them going out for another mission soon, her reassurances that there were only a little over two weeks left until the mission they had planned to Hateno Village would take place feeling like it fell on deaf ears, but as Zelda began to talk about everything and nothing at all, her amazement over the fact that Ilia was making progress on Epona at a rate none of them had dared to hope for the first time she had talked about the possibility of building another ship feeling almost infectious, Midna could not help but wish that she would actually be back for tomorrow. It must have been a sign that she had become better at suppressing and denying the unpleasant thoughts and feelings, but for a while, she felt how Zelda almost acted like she was just any other person, like she was just like the rest of them and not the princess of Hyrule. And for once, Midna was not in a hurry to remind herself of how that was not the case, instead choosing to pretend that it really was the case.

Midna had expected for that to be the end of it. Zelda would have her piece of evidence that Midna was keeping her promise about how they would make a fresh start, and the moment she would know that Midna was not simply waiting to lash out at her again, once more telling her that she was the princess and her enemy, she would return to spending time with Link, Ilia, everyone else, deciding to spend her days with the people who were better at interacting with her than Midna.

But for some reason, even as time passed, Midna found that Zelda did not leave her alone again. Rather than returning to the dining hall the morning after, as Midna had just sat down at her desk, trying to convince herself that she was just imagining things and that her bowl of porridge had not grown smaller since a week ago, someone knocked on her door, Midna barely having time to make sure that she had removed all traces of the hopeful smile on her face when the door opened, allowing Zelda to step into the room with an air about her as if this was completely normal and that she by all means should not have preferred to stay in the dining hall.

If she was honest, Midna could not see why Zelda was not seizing the opportunity to return to the dining hall. She had shown that she was the better person, she had reached out to make sure that no one could say that she did not try to keep her part of the promise, so why she kept on coming back was beyond Midna. But while she would have loved to ask for a reason, to ask Zelda if perhaps Ilia had left the dining hall as well to try to make sure Link would not lose himself completely to the thoughts about whether or not he would have been able to save Rusl if he had only spent more time looking at the harnesses, Midna could not bring herself to actually do it. It wasn't that she was afraid that she would get the answer that it really was the case, but for some reason, each time she would look over at Zelda while they ate and wonder why she had not returned to the dining hall a long time ago, she found that she preferred uncertainty to being told that Zelda really only was there because she had no other alternatives. And so, Midna let their little ritual continue, allowing it to pass by unmentioned.

However, it was not only a case of Zelda coming to her cabin to keep her company while she ate. Little by little, Midna began to notice how Zelda stayed close to her during the day as well, often turning around the corner, entering the room Midna had just found herself in from the other end, and waving at her, acting almost like they had not seen the other in days rather than it being a question of a few hours, almost as if she had known that she would be here. It was a self-absorbed thought, but as it continued, Midna could not help but slowly begin to entertain the idea of it not really being a coincidence at all, not with how often it happened. But, even then, Midna did not dare to ask about it, instead deciding to enjoy it while it lasted.

It was almost strange how little Zelda knew about the base, about the ship. Still, it was even stranger how eager she was to learn more, how often she would take Midna's hand and simply point towards one of the ancient pieces of machinery, asking her how it worked.

Midna could still vaguely remember showing Ilia how to shovel coal into the firebox of the ship, but as she showed it to Zelda, gesturing towards the firebox with her shovel as she explained how, if they wanted to leave the base, one of them would have to stay aboard at all times to make sure that the temperature of the water in the boiler wold not drop, she could not recall Ilia having ever looked that enthusiastic about standing in a room covered in a fine layer of coal dust, the smell of the brunt coal filling the air around them, making her eyes water.

"Do you think…" Zelda began, her gaze flickering back and forth between the shovel and Midna's face as she swallowed, clearly nervous about what she was about to say, "do you think that I might one day be allowed to come with you?"

In that moment, Midna felt how she might almost have said yes, tried to tell Zelda what she thought she wanted to hear, had it not been for the way Zelda looked up at her, clearly seeing adventures and a search for the unknown when she looked at the ship rather than the missions, the raised swords, and the hope that it would not be the day where the soldiers would be able to aim at them while they were pulled back up onto the ship they actually used it for. But still, Midna could hear the apologetic tone in her voice as she answered, making her feel almost like she was trying to justify her decision of not allowing Zelda to risk her life. "Zelda…" she shook her head, "I don't think so."

She had expected for Zelda to argue with her, for her to insist that she would be able to come along, trying to convince her that she would be a valuable part of the crew, but that was not the case. Instead, Zelda simply stared down at her feet, a defeated look in her eyes. "Oh."

Midna could almost hear what she was thinking, how Zelda had still not let go of the thought that they might be able to change the world, that they should use the ship to challenge Ganondorf, that she still believed that her belief that they were right would give them the edge they would so desperately need if it came to an actual fight with Ganondorf, but she did not voice any of it. For some reason, it felt almost worse than back when Midna had barely been able to talk with her for more than two seconds without Zelda mentioning her plans about how they should head out for some kind of suicidal mission to try to save people they had never even seen before, and after only a few moments, Midna knew why. Back then, she had at least been able to tell Zelda that it would not happen; she had been able to snap at her and tell her to forget about her plans. But now, she just had to look at her and know that she had disappointed her while also being aware of how she was really just trying to do her best to keep her safe.

Maybe Zelda was able to guess part of her reasoning. Midna really could not tell if that was the case, or if she had just given up on trying to convince her to be a part of something that would be larger than just the base itself. With the way she looked back over at the firebox, clearly trying her best to not look too disappointed, it could be a case of both being true. Somehow, although Midna knew that it should have been a relief to finally not have to listen to Zelda constantly trying to tell her that she knew better, to try to claim that she was able to predict whether or not they had a chance, it did not keep her from feeling a little pang of regret as she saw how she had finally made Zelda stop trying to infect her with her idealism.

Shaking her head, Midna willed the thoughts to disappear. It did not matter, not anymore. Truly, if Zelda had really stopped hoping that she would be able to make them join her in what would clearly be a doomed quest to make a stand against the king, she should have been relieved, and so, Midna pushed the feelings down, locking them away in the chest along with everything else. Even if she had cared, it would be too late now.

Zelda was halfway through her lunch—the thinnest chunk of bread Midna had ever seen coated with an even smaller layer of butter—when she looked up at her, the look in her eyes letting Midna know almost exactly what she would say before she had even opened her mouth.

"I just realised," Zelda began, her voice telling how that was very much not the case, that she had been thinking about it for a while, "that I haven't seen Link in ages. Do you know what happened to him—I thought the two of you used to spend time together along with Ilia?"

Slowing down, both to enjoy the feeling of eating again for longer and to give herself more time to think of what she could say, Midna looked at Zelda, attempting to figure out how much of the question had been a carefully rehearsed lie. There was no doubt in her mind that Zelda was not unsure about whether or not Midna had spent much time together with Link and Ilia, not with the amount of times Midna had seen her talk with both of them back during the first few weeks of her staying with them. That had to be a way for her to hide the real question within another. But as much as Midna tried to figure out whether or not Zelda truly did not know the reason for why Link had stopped talking to her, stopped talking with anyone really, she could not reach a conclusion. Despite how she could not see how it could be anything other than obvious to everyone how much Rusl's death had affected Link, with the way Zelda had first reacted to the news, it would not surprise her if she had not realised the connection.

So, placing what Uli had tried to refer to as a sandwich before sending her an apologetic look back down on the plate, Midna shook her head, willing herself not to cry, not now when they were talking about Link. "I think he preferred to be left alone for a bit," she finally said, hoping that that explanation would be enough for Zelda.

Of course, that was not the case. Really, Midna should have known that from the very beginning.

With a tilt of the head, Zelda drew her brows together, the look in her eyes telling Midna that she was coming closer to the correct answer. "Is it because," Zelda looked over at her, an unsure expression making its way to her face, "well, is it because…?"

"Yes." Midna nodded. "It is because of Rusl." and then, almost like she could not possibly have kept it inside for a second longer, she heard how she continued, the words rushing out, desperate to be heard, almost like a waterfall. "I don't know what to do. I thought that he would just need a little more time, but when Ilia told me to go talk to him, it seemed almost like he had somewhat come to terms with what had happened and that it was a matter of him permanently distancing himself from the rest of us." she shook her head, blinking to make sure that Zelda would not see how her eyes were filled with tears, her vision becoming blurrier each second, Zelda looking more and more like just a few splashes of colours to her. "I haven't talked to him since then—so for what? More than two weeks? And to tell you the truth, I have no idea about where he is right now. For all I know, I could wake up one morning to find that he took Epona to go attempt to save Rusl on his own with only an unfinished ship to get him back here to us." she was not able to finish the sentence, but from how Zelda was looking at her, Midna knew that she did not have to specify why that was a thought that was able to keep her up at night. Without a doubt, Link leaving the base on his own to head to the capital would be the same as him going to his death. Even if he would take the Shadow, Midna was still not optimistic enough to believe that there would be any happy ending waiting, should he attempt to save Rusl.

It was the feeling of Zelda's hand on top of hers that pulled her back to reality, Midna for a moment being able to forget about the worry sitting in the pit of her stomach each time she would look around only to conclude that she had no idea about where Link was to instead look over at her.

"Hey," Zelda said, "I am sure he is fine."

"You can't know that."

"No, I cannot." the corner of Zelda's lips curled upward into a little smile. "But with what both Ilia and Link have told me about you, I know that he is not going to leave you without saying goodbye. You don't have to worry about waking up to find him gone."

It should not have felt relieving to hear Zelda say that. Midna knew it shouldn't. Not with how Zelda always seemed to be willing to believe in the best in people, almost like she could not understand that the world did not give out rewards to people just for being kind to each other, that there was no point in sitting there with her and attempt to tell her that everything would work out in the end. And yet, as Zelda took her hand, giving it a little squeeze as she smiled up at her, Midna would have lied if she had said that it was not nice to have someone to try to combat her darker thoughts for her from time to time.

"Are you sure?"

Zelda nodded. "Absolutely. However, I think that we should try to talk with him. Going through all of this alone—it cannot be good for him."

"Well, what do you want me to do?" Midna could hear how there was a sharp edge to her words, but in that moment, all she wanted was really just for someone to take the responsibility away from her and tell her what they thought she should do. "Ilia has already told me to talk to him, but when I tried that, he refused to come back with me. He just stayed exactly where he was, acknowledging the fact that he was not to blame for what happened, and yet refusing to stop punishing himself for it. Nothing I said was able to change that."

The look that Zelda sent her was not one Midna knew how to interpret, Zelda looking almost like she was trying to figure out how to put what she was thinking into words without risking offending her.

"Well," Zelda said, "what did you say? When you tried to cheer him up, I mean?"

As she tried to recall just what she had said as she had looked over towards where Link was inspecting the harness so intensely it had felt like he was trying to burn a hole in it with his gaze alone, Midna found herself struggling to remember her exact words. With a shrug, she tried to seem unfazed. "I don't know. I think I tried to explain to him how thinking about Rusl was not going to bring him back."

"Hmm." Midna was not sure what to make of that sound, so she stayed quiet, allowing for Zelda to look up at her with an almost unsure look in her eyes. "Midna, would you mind it if I tried to talk to him, tried to make him come back to the rest of us?"

"No?" she had not meant for it to become a question, but that was, nevertheless, what it sounded like as the word left her mouth, Midna knowing that it was too late to take it back and instead deciding to continue. "I mean, it is not like I would even be able to stop you if I really did mind—I don't have the power to decide whom you can and cannot talk to after all. But I just want to warn you in advance; I doubt that you are going to be able to change anything. If Ilia found herself asking me to go talk to him, she must already have given up on reaching him, and if she has done that, I doubt that there is anything we can do to make Link come back." but as she said all of that, tried to make sure that Zelda would not be nursing some kind of hope that she would be able to bring back Link, Midna could hear how it had the exact opposite effect, the tone of her voice becoming a little lighter as she could not keep herself from imagining a situation where Zelda might be able to think of something neither she nor Ilia had thought about, something that would make Link stop looking at the harness like it might come to life and fly out to rescue Rusl if he just spent enough time with it.

Sending her a glance that almost made her feel like it might actually be the case, Zelda shrugged. "We will see." with that last, cryptic comment, she went back to her lunch, almost like she had not left Midna to ponder the question of just what she could possibly be planning, what exactly she thought she could tell Link that Midna and Ilia had not tried already.

But, in the end, she found herself at a loss for answers, and, with Zelda not exactly looking like she would tell her about her plan, she gave up to instead turn her attention back towards her lunch. She would just have to wait and see what happened.

As it turned out, that moment arrived sooner than Midna would ever have dared to allow herself to hope for.

After Zelda disappeared the moment they had finished lunch, leaving Midna to wander aimlessly around the base, feeling how the familiar sense of anxiousness began to set in, the feeling that things were a little too peaceful, that something was going to happen soon to remind them that they were all living on borrowed time, she had expected for her to only be gone for a while. After all, over those last few days Midna had come to grow used to her almost constant presence, almost expecting for Zelda to ask a question about even the tiniest thing about the base, why they did not try to close off the entrance even a little by using the bedsheets as a makeshift wall the same way they had done to create Ilia's workspace, how exactly people were chosen to be a member of the council. Although she would not quite admit to missing it, it was strange to look up to find that there was no one sitting next to her after she had gone to make sure that the Shadow would be able to get them to Hateno Village and back again, that Zelda was not two seconds away from asking her a question about just how the ship worked, how much weight it could carry, how they made sure that they would never exceed the limit once they brought back what they had taken during a mission. But Zelda did not return, the hours passing by with Midna growing increasingly annoyed at the fact that she continued to forget about how that they were not friends. They weren't; Zelda could leave her alone for as long as she wanted to and Midna would still not have cared. They might have promised to make a fresh start, but that did not mean that they necessarily had to become friends, that they should be inseparable until the end of times. Truly, she could not have cared less about whether or not Zelda was wasting her time with her attempts at trying to talk with Link about something Midna doubted she fully understood.

So when she heard someone knock on the door that evening, the reason Midna almost leapt out of her chair was simply because she had grown used to the silence, the reason she hurried over to open up the door was that she did not want for Zelda to knock again, disturbing her peace.

"There you are, I was just beginning to wonder about whether—" Midna began. And then she fell silent.

For Zelda was not the only person standing outside her cabin. Next to her, standing between Zelda and Ilia, was Link.

As he saw her look down at him, the teasing smirk that had been tucking at her lips freezing in an instant, he shot her a small smile. "Hi." his voice sounded hoarse, almost like he had not used it since the last time she had tried to talk with him. "It is good to see you."

"What are you doing here?" Midna did not mean to sound rude, but before she had a chance to stop herself, she already knew that it was too late to keep that from happening. The words were already out, hanging in the air between them.

Luckily, despite the way Zelda looked over at her, lifting a brow, almost like she could not believe that this was the way Midna would react, and how Ilia put her arm around Link's shoulders like she wanted to comfort him, Link only shook his head at her. "Zelda came to talk to me. She told me that—well," he shrugged, "to be honest I think a description such as 'she ordered me to come back with her to sit down to eat dinner with you and Ilia' would be the best to describe the conversation, but I know that Zelda would only interpret it as a sign that I was still trying my best to continue to isolate myself."

"Because it would have been true!"

To Midna's surprise, Link did not argue with that, instead sending Zelda a warm look, blinking at her as his smile grew a little, finally looking just halfway sincere. "Sure thing, Zelda."

Resisting the urge to ask about just what had happened, Midna looked back and forth between them, trying her best to gauge just how much she had missed, when Link had begun to smile again after Rusl's death without it looking forced. To tell the truth, she already knew that the answer would be, that, before right now, she had not seen it happen before, but it felt almost like she could not accept that. It was not that it hurt to see that he was growing closer to Zelda, but rather a matter of that smile being proof that, despite the years they had known each other, she had not been able to tell him what he had needed to hear back when Ilia had ordered her to go talk with him.

And yet, despite how she fought to prepare herself for the moment, Midna felt her stomach drop as Link gestured towards the room behind her, pointing towards the cabin.

With a little chuckle, still not looking away from Zelda, Link shrugged. "Well, no matter what, Zelda said that she would have to insist that Ilia and I should come to join the two of you for dinner."

The question that waited just below the surface was obvious, but in that moment, Midna could honestly not make sense of any of what was happening. Just a few weeks ago, she had been alone, unable to talk with any of her friends or Zelda. Even the fact that Zelda seemed to have appointed herself as the one responsible for making sure that she was not alone all day was only something that had begun to feel like a habit a few days ago, but here Zelda was, having somehow managed to convince both Ilia and Link to come to her cabin to eat dinner together.

By all means, she should have been annoyed, looking at Zelda and wondering what had made her think that she had any right to make promises like that on her behalf, telling Link and Ilia that they would be welcome to come join them without first coming to tell Midna about it. And perhaps it was just yet another piece of evidence that Zelda seemed to have a gift for being able to make her way into people's lives, slowly making sure that she had secured her place before she began to drag other people along with her, but with how she had not protested when Zelda had first invited herself into her room, Midna could not see a way for her to deny Link and Ilia the option to do the same, especially not with how Link already looked like he was five seconds away from brushing Ilia's arm away and leaving them again.

So, rather than turning to face Zelda and ask her what she thought she was doing, Midna nodded. "Uh, of course. Zelda told me about it while we were eating lunch." at that, Zelda at least had the sense to look embarrassed, but the sight of her staring at the tip of her boots did not make Midna feel as happy as it should have done. Trying not to think of it, Midna turned around to open the door up wider, having to raise her voice to make herself heard above the general noise and squeaking flooring as Zelda, Ilia, and Link all followed her into the cabin. "Now, I don't have enough chairs for all of us, but if I stand, then maybe you and Link," she looked at Ilia, "could share a chair and then—"

She had meant to offer Zelda the last chair, but before she got the chance to do so, Zelda had cut in, already moving towards the desk that had come to act the role of their dining table as well. "That is not a problem," she announced as she reached out towards the heavy piece of furniture, "we can just pull it over here, and then Link and Ilia can take the chairs and we can just sit on your bed."

Before Midna got the chance to object, Zelda had already placed her plate on top of the table and begun to try to pull the desk away from the wall, digging her boots into the floor as she fought to make the table move.

Raising a brow, Midna decided to wait a moment before letting Zelda know that that was not an option. It would be entertaining to see what she would do once she realised that the desk had been made to be able to sit inside the cabin of a ship that would sail through the air, making it necessary for it to be heavy enough so that it would not move just because the ship had been hit by a strong breeze.

However, the next moment, Midna saw that she should have been quicker to tell Zelda that she was not interested in that plan, for, almost like they had noticed the fact that she had very much suggested standing up because she did not want to be close to anyone, Link and Ilia stepped over to help Zelda in her quest to move the table that had to be almost as heavy as all three of them combined. With the three of them standing around the desk, Ilia counting to make sure they all lifted at the same time, it only took them a few seconds to move the table across the room, Zelda letting go of her side a little too early, the result being that Midna had to fight the instinct to cover her ears as the sound of wood meeting wood echoed through the room.

Almost like she had not been bothered by the sound at all, Zelda turned towards her and pointed in the direction of the bed. "Do you want to sit closest to the wall or would you rather sit on the other side?"

"The other side." if there really was no other choice, then Midna could at least make sure that she would not be trapped between Zelda and a wall. When she realised that Zelda was waiting for her to climb in, Midna sent Ilia a glare, mentally begging her to offer to switch places with her, but either Ilia did not notice or—and Midna hoped that was the case—she was so busy looking over at Link, having her arm slung around his waist, that she chose to abandon Midna, leaving her to her fate, over losing her place next to Link. Midna would not have blamed her for that, not with the weeks they had spent without having been able to get Link to join them again.

Supressing a sigh, Midna hurried in, accepting the plate that Ilia slid across the table. Just minutes before, her stomach had rumbled at the thought of dinner, but now, the moment Zelda sat down next to her, the two of them only separated by a few centimetres of air, she found that she was not really hungry anymore. If it would have made it so that she could have left the room without it being blatantly obvious why, she would have given everything on her plate to Zelda, but as it was, she used the almost comforting feeling of cutting the food into tiny pieces, hoping that she could make the process of eating last longer, trick her stomach into not noticing the fact that Uli might have reduced the portions again, and, what felt like it was the most important part in that moment, to delay the moment where she would inevitably have to look up and face the fact that the silence in the room had reached the point of it becoming awkward a long time ago. If Zelda could sit next to her, eating with the air of someone who had just been served a banquet rather than a few pieces of bread and a thin slice of meat, Midna could ignore the almost suffocating feeling of knowing that they were all waiting for someone to say something, anything at all, that would allow them to bring an end to the awkwardness in the room.

In the end, that task landed on Zelda's plate as she was the first of them to finish her dinner.

Placing the cutlery on the plate, the different pieces of metal clattering, she cleared her throat, her hand stopping halfway through the motion of reaching out for a napkin that did not exist as she looked at them. "I suppose that we all have an idea about why I asked the two of you to join us for dinner," she said, looking over at Link and Ilia with a look that told them that, while it might not look like it, to Zelda, the sad meal they had just shared might as well have been a feast fit for a king, "to tell you the truth, I think that we could all use the opportunity to spend time with someone we know, to get a chance to talk about the things that makes us feel alone."

Midna wanted to close her eyes, wanted to do anything to block out the fact that Zelda, despite how she might think that she was being vague, could not have made it any more obvious what she was talking about if she had looked directly over at Link while saying it, raising her eyebrows, but she already knew that it would only make it even worse. Why had she agreed to let them come into her cabin? She already knew the answer, how it had felt unjust to say no when Zelda had already done the impossible by even convincing Link to come to the ship with her and Ilia, but now, she found herself wishing that she had been able to kick her conscience into the corner and make sure that Zelda would know that talking about things were not exactly something they could afford the luxury of doing out here. Talking meant remembering, remembering meant the risk of losing your mind to the past, and that carried a risk of not being able to focus on the fight that staying alive was.

But it was not her duty to tell Zelda about any of that, and with how she could see Link tighten his grip around the fork, his knuckles turning white, Midna knew that it was only a matter of time before Zelda would find herself with no other choice but to learn that lesson quickly.

However, that was not what happened. Link did not look up at her, a lost look in his eyes making it apparent that he did not appreciate Zelda's attempts at trying to make him tell them about the reasons for how he had disappeared for the last few weeks. As Midna watched, the pull at the corners of his mouth formed a smile rather than a frown, and while it was an expression laced with grief, it was a smile nonetheless.

"You are right." Link's voice was barely more than a whisper, but in the otherwise total silence, it sounded almost like he was yelling. "It is time to talk about it. Midna," noticing how he turned to face her, Midna tried her best to sit up a bit straighter, attempted to hide the confusion on her face, "I am sorry. For everything, but especially for brushing you off back when you tried to talk to me. That goes for you too, Ilia. I should—" his voice broke, but no one said anything, instead waiting as Link reached up towards his eyes, furiously wiping away the tears. "I shouldn't have stopped talking with you. That would not have been what Rusl would have wanted me to do."

The food in her stomach felt like stone as Midna heard the name mentioned again. This was not what she had expected to happen when she had found them all standing outside the cabin. If that had been the case, she would never have allowed them to come inside, would never have allowed herself to put herself in a situation where she might be forced to talk about Rusl without any way of escaping it, having to listen to Zelda's attempts at making them all open up when she would prefer to just shove it all away. It was one thing to try to cheer up her friends, but as Midna cast a short glance at Zelda and saw the way she was nodding along to Link's words, clearly doing her best to seem empathetic—or, some tiny part of her mind kept on insisting, maybe she was not pretending to understand anything, maybe she really did know what it felt like—she knew that she would not be satisfied until she had got them all to share their feelings with each other.

Clenching her jaw and shoving her hands into her pockets to keep the others from seeing how she could not stop shaking, Midna tried to clear her mind, staring directly ahead and seeing nothing at all. They could not make her say anything. If she preferred to keep it all inside, then she would continue to do so, no matter how brightly Zelda smiled at Link, wordlessly encouraging him to continue.

And continue Link did. Reaching out to take Ilia's hand, he smiled to himself, almost like he was transported back in time as he looked up again. "Did you know that it was Rusl who taught me how to read?" he shook his head. "He saw me looking at the books he and Uli had been able to save during the destruction and asked me if I wanted to read them. When I found myself with no other choice than to admit that I did not know how to, he made sure to set aside time to teach me how to. He said that I was a natural talent, that I was able to pick it up so quickly that he could barely understand it, but, looking back, I am sure he only said it to keep me from thinking too much about the fact that Colin was sitting right next to me, already able to read simple sentences when I was still trying to figure out how to spell my own name."

Midna had not known that. Glancing over at Link, she tried her best not to pay too much attention to how the grief in his eyes had, for a moment, given way to make room for the joy of the memory. It did not mean anything. So Link had a happy memory of Rusl, that did not change the fact that no amount of reminiscing about what was lost would ever be able to bring anyone back. It never had. All it would ever achieve was increasing the danger of getting stuck in the past.

However, as she looked around, trying to gauge whether there was anyone in the room who might have agreed with her, Midna could not deny the fact that she might very well be the only one who felt that way with the way Zelda smiled at him, almost as if to encourage him, and how Ilia leant over towards Link, moving like she was drawn in by the story. While Midna would not have claimed to be so naïve that she would have thought that that could be the end of it, that Zelda might finally be satisfied with her project of trying to make them all share their memories of Rusl, she still sent Ilia a disappointed glare, feeling how the swiftness of the motion made something hurt in her neck, as her friend gave in to the pull of Zelda's ideas as well.

"I think he taught me to read as well. To be honest, I don't remember that much from my life before, but with how my father was the mayor back in Ordon Village, I don't think he had the time to teach me how to. But that still is not what I truly remember Rusl for. To me, he will most likely always be the one who made sure that we would be able to survive. Had it not been for how he was able to spot the ships minutes before the rest of us would ever have become aware of their presence, I doubt that any of us would have been able to escape the destruction at all, but he did, he warned as many people as he could, and told us all to hide in the forest. To be honest, there were a couple of minutes there where I thought that he would not make it out himself, for he waited until the last moment to abandon the village and join the rest of us."

"Wait, I thought that it was a coincidence that you had not been in the village that day."

Midna had not meant to say anything, and yet, she found herself unable to stay quiet, the words almost feeling like they would choke her if she did not allow them to be heard. All this time, she had thought that the survivors had just been exceptionally lucky that day, and now, it would appear that all of that was really Rusl's doing. As she thought about it, it felt almost ridiculous to think that she had never considered that before, had never connected the dots and realised just why no one, not even Jaggle or Bo, who by all means should have objected to losing his position as the mayor, had ever said anything about the fact that Rusl had sat down at the end of the table in the meeting room. After all, she had known that they listened to her and Link because they looked at them and saw the strangers who had appeared when they had needed them the most, landing their ship next to the ruins of their old homes and offering them the opportunity to create a new one, so why the thought that the same might be the case for Rusl had never struck her, Midna could not understand in that moment.

Ilia sent her a look that seemed almost as surprised as Midna felt. "I thought you knew. I mean, with how much time you spent with Rusl, I had assumed that he would have told you."

She was not trying to make her feel worse. That was what Midna tried to tell herself. Ilia had not chosen the words specifically to make her question whether she had ever known Rusl at all, she would never do that. But no matter how many times Midna tried to tell herself that, it was, nevertheless, what it felt like, the reason why her chest hurt slightly as she opened her mouth, willing her voice not to tremble as she responded. "Yeah, so would I."

The temperature in the room fell, Midna at once having to fight to stay still rather than shaking despite the coat that had been able to keep her somewhat warm only moments before. This was the exact reason for why she had not wanted to talk about Rusl. He was gone. All they would do now would only serve to ruin the memories they had of him.

Glancing between them and seeing how her brilliant plan of making them open up was threatened by the silence in the room, Zelda placed her hands on the table, the tone of her voice giving away the fact that her carefree expression was really just a mask, a way to try to save the situation. "I am sure that Rusl must have thought that you knew already, that someone else had told you. That, or he assumed that you had been able to guess it. I mean, I doubt he would just go around telling everyone about how he was the person responsible for saving the residents of Ordon; that was not the impression I had of him."

It was a weak excuse, especially as Link had not appeared to have any reaction to the story, not showing any signs of being surprised, but Midna was willing to accept it. Anything to try to convince herself that she had known Rusl at all. "Yes," she said, "I suppose that might be the case."

She did not have to look over at Zelda to know that she supressed a relieved sigh, her plan having just been saved, before speaking once more. "Personally, I know that I never got the chance to know Rusl the way you must have, but he was still among some of the first people here who seemed to grow used to my presence. To tell the truth, I think I was a bit surprised when he just told me about how the harnesses functioned, that he did not think twice before telling me about what the lines hanging from the sides of the ship were intended for." Zelda let the sentence trail off, but there was no need to finish it. With how the words felt almost like they were chosen specifically to get to her, she might as well have stared at Midna through it all.

They had promised each other to make a fresh start. That was what Midna tried to remind herself of. If Zelda was trying to make her feel bad about her behaviour during the first months of knowing each other, she would be wasting her time. Besides, Midna knew that she had been justified in being clear about how little she had trusted her. No matter what happened, no matter how many times Zelda had since then proved to perhaps be the one among them who seemed the most intent on overthrowing the king, it was only natural to be wary when finding the princess of Hyrule aboard the Shadow. Blindly trusting the person who was the second in line to the Hyrulean throne wold not only have been stupid; it would have been so naïve that it would have bordered on self-destructive.

And yet, as she told herself that, Midna could feel how she pulled her shoulders upwards, almost like she was expecting an attack as she looked around at the table and noted how they were all looking towards her.

Finally, Zelda brought an end to the uncomfortable silence. With a little motion, almost like she had been about to reach out to take her hand to mirror the way Link and Ilia were sitting across from them, only to stop halfway through, she gestured towards her. "What about you, Midna?"

"What about me?" she knew what they were waiting for, how they were all expecting for her to pour her heart out, to share her most treasured memory with them, but that did not mean that she would ever give in, that she would begin to dig into the chest, letting the spirits escape. If that was what they wanted, they would have to wait for the rest of their lives, for she would never begin to move backwards. Time forced them to continue to move forwards, and Midna knew that trying to fight that would only bring heartbreak to anyone who made an attempt.

Maybe Link and Ilia realised that their attempts at making them all find a shared past in reminiscing about Rusl would be a waste of time, for they remained quiet.

The same, however, could not be said for Zelda.

Reaching out to take Midna's hand, this time not stopping the movement halfway through, she looked almost like she might be able to understand her hesitance to share her memories of Rusl with them. But that impression was shattered the next moment, as Zelda tried her best to pull her hand back, making Midna follow along, giving Zelda the opportunity to bring her other hand up to fully envelop her hand as she spoke. "You must have something about Rusl you want to share as well." it was not a question, Midna could hear that, even without seeing how Zelda lifted a brow. "Because, if you do, you can share it with us."

The way she tightened her grip on her hand should not have been as comforting as it was. More than anything, Midna wished that she could just brush it off, withdraw her hand and let Zelda see that, sometimes, no amounts of trying to make herself believe that there might be more to a gang of people attacking ships and refusing to help anyone in the kingdoms who might find themselves in the same situation as the one they were trying to escape would be able to change that they really were just that—people focusing on their own survival and leaving everyone else to their own fight to stay alive without providing any help.

But as she looked around at the table and saw how they were all looking at her, Ilia sending her a nod as they made eye contact, Midna could not bring herself to shatter the childish sense of optimism Zelda almost seemed to exude. "I suppose," she began, hoping that they would not view it as her giving in to the effect of Zelda gazing at her with such intensity in her eyes that it made her feel almost like she was all that mattered in that moment, "that Rusl was the first person… he—I—I think I might have looked at him and thought that—if I still had a father, I would want him to be just like Rusl." it was not the entire truth, but it was all she was willing to share with them. Sending a glance towards Zelda, hoping it would be harsh, but already knowing that it was not the case, Midna cocked her head. "Happy now?"

"No." Zelda shook her head. "But that was also not what my hope for all of this was."

And as much as Midna wanted to claim that Zelda's plan had been an undeniable failure, as the conversation continued around her, Zelda having a surprising amount of stories to share considering how little time she had been able to spend with Rusl, the mental image of Rusl trying to explain the harnesses to Zelda did bring a smile to her lips. But only a little one.