The Trapped Assassin
By SarahsSupplyCloset
Author's Note: Thank you for still reading. I appreciate it.
Disclaimer: I don't own CHUCK. I don't make money writing CHUCK fan fiction.
He held onto her hand so tightly, she feared she might lose circulation in it. But in the end, she thought it'd be worth it.
Chuck hadn't let go of her hand since they'd climbed off of the pilot boat, leaving Henri and the Annie behind. She hadn't looked back in spite of feeling the captain's longing gaze on her. Instead, she'd held onto Chuck's bicep with both hands and smiled up at him. And then Chuck had taken her hand.
He'd clung to her hand climbing into the cab, and he'd held her hand during the cab ride, climbing back out of the cab, walking through the lobby of their hotel, during the elevator ride…
And as the elevator stopped to let the future Mr. and Mrs Woodcomb off, Sarah was the one who clung to Chuck's hand. Sarah didn't miss the excited glint in Ellie's face as she said goodnight, kissed her brother's cheek, and gave Sarah a long look. It was obvious to everyone in the elevator what was happening, and this time there was nothing awkward about it.
Devon had even flashed Chuck the "okay" sign behind Ellie's back as he followed his fiancée out of the elevator. Whatever. Let them know their curly-haired nerd was about to get laid. Let them know he'd gotten laid on the Annie, too. She was fine with that.
She was filled with an almost heady giddiness and confidence, none of the dark thoughts of whatever lay in her future clouding her mind. She'd since pushed that all aside tonight and was just basking in the tight grip of his hand in hers.
It wasn't until they got inside of her suite, that they let go. She glanced over her shoulder at him. "I know we drank about the volume of Lake Erie in champagne on that yacht, but do you want anything else to drink?" she asked.
He huffed and shook his head. "No. Thanks. It's almost four in the morning, if I touch even a drop of alcohol, I'll never sleep again." She giggled and nodded. But he had a strange look on his face, hesitant, tentative. And then he put his hands in his pants pockets and cleared his throat, looking off to the side. "Anyways, uh, it felt like that Captain Henri guy was purposely ordering the wait staff to force as much champagne down our throats as possible."
A ha.
Trying not to smirk, she crossed her arms at her chest and arched an eyebrow. "Chuck?" He kept looking away from her. She saw it now. The jealousy. "Are you jealous about the yacht captain's extra attentions towards me?"
He grumbled and rolled his eyes.
"Hmm? What was that?" she teased, this time smirking as she slowly walked closer.
"I said I'm only human. Not that you belong to me," he said quickly. "I can't imagine you ever belonging to anyone. But he did it so blatantly and in front of me and it was kind of like, dude what the fuck. Just rude, you know?" He looked at her closely, then winced. "Probably not super attractive, is it? Sorry."
"Not typically, I guess." He looked ashamed, but she rushed to get rid of that, framing his shoulders with her hands and squeezing. "But I have to admit, it is kind of gratifying. Really strokes my ego, if you don't mind me saying so. It's nice to know another man being interested gets under your skin. Even if we did only meet about two weeks ago."
Chuck blushed. "I'm a red blooded man. And you're…well, you. If you'd decided to run off and live on that yacht with Henri the French Pirate, there'd be nothing I could do about it."
She laughed and shook her head. "The sea life isn't for me, Chuck. Though I have to say, that boat sex felt pretty good." Then she gave Chuck a certain look as he frowned at that. "It might've had more to do with my partner than it did the setting."
His grin made her feel like she was walking on air, and then he leaned in and kissed her. "Seriously, though, Sarah, I apologize if at any point I seemed cave-mannish. It's not my place. I didn't earn that."
"You're so sweet," she uttered in awe, shaking her head a little. "Seriously, I can't handle how sweet you are sometimes."
And then Sarah rounded his shoulders with her arms and she kissed him warmly. The warmth became hot after a while, and his arms tightened around her torso. Things became more intense then, and she lowered her hand to his hip, walking him towards the bedroom as they kissed.
They undressed each other slowly, each article of clothing seeming to take ages to get off. He unclasped the hoop around her neck and kissed her there, down her spine, over her shoulders, unbuttoning and unzipping her dress and slowly easing it down her body, following with his warm mouth.
And then he moved in front of her, wearing no shirt, no undershirt, nothing covering his chest and arms much to her pleasure, in nothing but his pants, and he stooped to kiss the crest of one of her breasts, then did the same to the other, and her head fell back to just enjoy as he sucked on one of her nipples.
However long he continued his attentions on her breasts, she wasn't sure, but then his hands slipped down to her hips and he guided her to her bed. When the backs of her legs bumped the mattress, she latched onto his belt buckle with her fingers and quickly pulled the leather strap out of it, undoing the front of his pants.
But then Chuck was kissing her, harder than before, a bit more desperately, and she grabbed his shoulders to kiss him back just as hard, just as desperate.
When he slipped an arm around the small of her back and leaned her down so that she laid on the end of the bed, she whimpered his name, slipping her hand down the back of his pants and squeezing his ass.
He groaned and pushed himself back up to his feet, shoving his pants down to his ankles and hurriedly kicking at them and his shoes until he was in nothing but his boxers.
Chuck draped himself over her again and kissed her, his lips trailing down her body, tasting her, and she just let herself go limp and reveled in the experience.
This was definitely something no other man she'd slept with had felt the need to waste his time with, she thought to herself distantly. Taking the time to just explore her body with their lips. Maybe because it was so one-sided. She didn't know. It didn't matter. Chuck's tongue had dipped into her belly button and was teasing her. And speaking of teasing, she felt the pads of his fingers playing with the waistband of her underwear.
The things he was doing with his lips and tongue, the way he touched just the right spot in just the right way…
Sarah bit her lip and smiled up at the ceiling, then looked down at him, watching him lift one of her legs and give her an open-mouthed kiss on the inside of her thigh. "Hey…" she panted, and his eyes swept up to meet hers, his eyebrows lifted in question. "You comin' up here with me anytime soon?"
He pulled his mouth from her thigh and chuckled. "I mean, sure!"
That made her laugh, and she laughed a little harder as he leapt up on top of her. She made a quiet 'womph' sound when he landed, even though he'd caught himself with his elbows so that he didn't actually hurt her.
Sarah wrapped her legs around him and pulled him down by his arm so that their chests were pressed together, and then she kissed him beneath his ear and whispered his name. She arched her hips against his then and earned a soft whimper, but it felt different. She knew why, and she slipped her hand under the waistband of his boxers again to squeeze his ass, pulling him down so that their groins met, rubbing him in time with her thrusts.
Chuck cursed a little under his breath. "Maybe… just lie up by the pillows." He rolled off of her and nodded as she crawled up to lie back against the pillows on her bed. She raised her eyebrow and curled her finger for him to join her and he did with a crooked smile.
She took his face in both hands as he crawled over her and she kissed him hard again, before she slipped her hand inside of his boxers and curled her fingers around him. He shivered under her touch and groaned, lying on top of her again and rocking his hips into her hand as she rubbed him.
"Wait, wait wait." He flipped himself onto his back next to her and grumbled to himself, "Maybe it's—I'll just get rid of these." He shoved his boxers down his legs and kicked them over the side of the bed, before he rolled back on top of her. "There. That'll—that'll do it I'm sure."
Sarah nodded encouragingly, but she had a feeling it wouldn't do it. He was only human and it was after 4 in the morning after they'd just been on a freaking yacht with the cool sea wind and the heavy meal and a lot of alcohol…
She wasn't upset.
But she could see on his face that he was getting both embarrassed and maybe a little frustrated too.
She kept trying for him more than for herself. As ready as she'd been, as ready as she still was, she wasn't going to be upset if Chuck couldn't do this. God, in the last 2 weeks, with all of the sometimes intense sex they'd been having, and this had only happened once? That alone was impressive.
Chuck made a frustrated groaning sound and dropped his forehead to her shoulder. "Damn it…"
Sarah took her hand away from him and just wrapped him up in her arms, pulling him close against her. "Chuck, listen, it's okay…"
He just groaned again. "It isn't. I'm so sorry."
"Hey, no apologizing." She squirmed a bit so that she could push his head a little and force him to look at her. "What are you sorry about?"
"We were going to have sex and now we're not because I'm…I can't, I guess." He gestured down their bodies with a flick of his thumb.
"It's okay, Chuck. You're a human being, after all."
"Uuuugghhh." He rolled off of her and she could see he was totally blushing between his fingers he was pushing over his face. "I'm really sorry. Seriously. I think-I think it's just, you know—"
"Chuck, come on…"
"I'm exhausted maybe. Maybe that's it. You know?"
"Of course."
"And I'm a little buzzed, with all that champagne…"
"And all the food."
"Right, the-the food…I'm… Aw crap, seriously, I'm so so sorry." He flattened his hands over his face and completely covered it.
God, he was mortified. She felt terrible about how hard he was taking it out on himself. "Chuck, please stop being so hard on yourself," she tried, scooting close to him and reaching up to play with his windswept curls. "This happens to everybody." She winced when he peeked between his fingers with a flat look. "Well, it's true! It does!"
"I knooow," he whined. When he lowered his arms to his sides again, the bright blush was still on his face. "I'm still sorry. I mean it's not anything you did wrong…We were both going to do this and I let you down. I let us both down."
"You did not, Chuck, oh my God, give yourself a break!" She couldn't help but giggle. "We're both fine, we're gonna survive this." She got another flat look, more of a glare this time actually. "Sorry," she said with a wince. "I'm just trying to get you to see that this hasn't upset me. I'm not mad, I'm not disappointed. Please don't be embarrassed."
The look he gave her was so pained, she couldn't help pouting a little and stroking his face with a pitying sound.
"Let's just get some sleep. You can stay here."
"Oh, you mean instead of walking back down to my suite in the worst rendition of the walk of shame known to mankind?"
Sarah laughed and shook her head at him. "Stop it. Seriously. Chuck, look at me." He did. "It's okay."
He finally relented and nodded, smiling, accepting her short but warm kiss, and letting her kick him out of bed for a few seconds so that she could pull the sheets down and they could climb under them.
She folded herself up into his side and fell asleep almost the moment they turned out the lights.
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She blinked awake and groggily pushed her hand against the mattress, sliding it over towards where he'd been when she'd fallen asleep. But the bed was empty, the sheets cool to the touch.
Frowning, she turned to look around the bedroom, yawning so violently her jaw popped, and she pushed herself up to sit. Had he woken up and gone back down to his own suite without waking her up somehow? Was she that tired that she'd slept through it?
Is this what he'd felt like at the beginning when they'd first met?
Glancing at the clock, she saw it was almost 10 in the morning. She had been exhausted apparently.
But then she heard something, and she slid out of her bed and grabbed a robe to shrug it on, being that she'd fallen asleep with literally nothing but panties on. Her spy senses kicked in then and she quietly snuck out of the bedroom into the main room of the suite, casting her gaze through the place, taking in the details. Nothing was different from what it had been when they'd gotten back from the yacht dinner. Nothing was out of place. Except…
The door to the balcony was open a few inches, and the drapes were fluttering a bit in the breeze.
A ha.
Smiling, she ran her fingers through her hair to smooth it a bit and straightened her robe, clearing her throat, before she sidled up to the door and slid it open, peeking out onto the balcony.
Chuck was splayed out on one of the chairs, his head back, eyes shut, the breeze messing with those curls. He'd put his button-up back on but left it unbuttoned and that, too, was fluttering in the sea breeze wafting over the balcony.
"Take a picture, it lasts longer," he drawled, his lips barely moving. And then he seemed to smirk almost in spite of himself.
She snorted and crossed to where he lounged. "You are a pretty nice picture right now, I have to admit." She reached down and fixed the collar of his shirt, as it was all twisted under itself.
"Am I? You into scraggly post-yacht party bums lounging on your balcony?"
"I might be," she responded immediately.
He finally blinked his eyes open and peered up at her, his eyes so bright in the morning light angling over his face, the gold in his irises standing out amongst the brown flecks. She stroked her hand over his hair and smiled down at him. He smiled back, and then it wavered a bit. "Hey…Sarah. I'm, um, I'm sorry about earlier this morning. My not being able to, um, I mean, er…perform, I guess, is a, uh, nice way of saying it." He blushed again and diverted his gaze.
"Don't be sorry," she said vehemently. She'd almost forgotten it had happened, but apparently Chuck hadn't. He'd probably dwelled on it all this time. "I'm not. I was so freaking tired I'm afraid you probably wouldn't have gotten much of a performance out of me, either, honestly."
He sniffed in amusement. "That's not possible. At this point, I'd say that's impossible."
"Hey, I'm human too."
"Prove it!" he demanded, and then he stuck his tongue between his teeth. She ignored the slight sting in her chest. He didn't know her story, and he definitely didn't mean his teasing in any other way than complimentary. But the fact was, she hadn't ever felt fully human before these last two weeks in Nice had happened. And now she'd have to find a way to rediscover her humanity in the real world, away from the spy life. "Hey." She felt his fingers slip around hers and she looked back down at him with a smile. He frowned a little. "I really am sorry, Sarah. I know it, um, probably killed the mood this morning."
She sighed. "Chuck, it's fine. It happens. I wasn't upset then and I'm not upset now." And then she saw something in his face as he nodded and tilted his head forward again to look out over the water. She felt a little foolish for not getting it before. She just didn't really have any experience with this sort of thing. She'd figured he just felt bad because they couldn't have sex when they'd both wanted it. But of course it had screwed with his confidence too. He was ashamed of himself.
Her heart tightened a bit in her chest. And she slid in behind him and rounded his shoulders with her arms, pushing her lips against his temple and just holding him. "Chuck, I couldn't even count on 6 hands how many times we've had sex in the last…15 days or however long. Not to be crass, but it's been…a whole lot of sex, really amazing sex. Your body told you to rest this one time. That doesn't take anything away from the last 2 weeks."
Chuck let out a long sigh and put one of his hands over hers on his chest, squeezing. "Thanks. And I know that…I do. But, you know, it's…I'm kinda ashamed still. I can't help it. It's a mortifying moment in a man's life when he…when he can't get it up. Ugh I hate that I just said that."
She giggled. And then she bit her lip, an idea blossoming in her mind. As she leaned down lower to press her lips to his ear, she muttered, "How can I make the shame go away?" She let her nails lightly scrape down his bare chest between the flaps of his open shirt. "Any ideas?"
He gulped and squeezed her hand tighter, before he let go and clasped his fingers around her wrist that was still at his shoulder. "Not sure what you have in mind."
Sarah had a feeling he did. But he didn't want to say it or assume and then be wrong. That would add to his shame.
So she showed him, sliding her hand further and further down until she was playing with the waistband of his boxers. "Now that you've slept off the exhaustion, the champagne, the food, that sea breeze…" She teased his earlobe with her teeth and felt him shiver in her grasp. "Maybe I can take another crack at it…?"
Chuck didn't have to answer verbally, because he nodded just a little, and when she swung around to stand in front of him, he made to stand up. She stopped him, her hand on his chest, and she forced him to sit back against the chair.
Carefully, she lowered herself into a kneeling position in front of him, the thick material of the robe protecting her knees from the hard ground of the balcony.
"Sarah. It's okay. It's fine. You don't have to—"
"Sh," she admonished, a teasing glint in her eye. She smirked at him as he sat back against the chair and smiled in amusement. But the look on his face turned to awe and hunger, the cutest and yet hottest thing she'd ever seen, when she slipped her fingers into the waistband of his boxers and began to tug them down.
Chuck gulped loudly and lifted himself off of the chair so that she could pull the boxers down to his knees, and then he froze a bit, his eyes wide. "Wait…out here? It's…I mean, people might…"
"Sh," she admonished again. And then she grinned at him and moved a little so she could pull his boxers all the way off, leaving them in a pile on the ground next to her. She took him in her hand immediately and started to slowly pump him in her fist. Goosebumps were all over his arms and legs and he shivered, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.
This already felt different from six hours ago.
He felt more alert to her touch, his response was immediate, and electric.
She wasn't sure how many minutes she stayed there kneeling in front of him, but she finally took him into her mouth, watching the pleasure dance across his handsome face. He tenderly reached down to stroke her hair out of her face and tuck it behind her ear, and she smiled around him, starting to bob her head.
He whimpered, the deeper she pushed him, and she finally pulled him out of her mouth when he hardened enough.
"Oh my God, Sarah…"
Without needing anymore encouragement than the look he was giving her, she still let him reach down and gently take her by her arms, pulling her up towards him. She giggled in excitement, pleased at his eagerness, that look of lost self-esteem nowhere to be found in him now.
But then she straightened her arm against his chest and stopped him from pulling her onto his lap. Giggling again, she panted, "Wait, just a second…" And just like that, she slid her panties down to her ankles and stepped out of them before she let him wantonly pull her onto his lap this time.
She bent her legs on either side of him, her knees jammed uncomfortably into the chair back, but she didn't care.
They both gasped as he entered her, and she pressed her forehead to his, nuzzling his nose. Holding the back of his head in one hand, the other grabbing onto the chair behind him, she started her thrusts. They were sweeping, quick thrusts, because as much as she wanted him, needed him, as much as she wanted him getting that confidence back as they made love out on her balcony, they were also out on her balcony. And at any moment someone else could walk out on their own balcony and at least see them over the railing from their shoulders up. It wouldn't exactly be a mystery as to what they were doing out here.
"Oh…oh Sarah." He cursed under his breath and held one thigh in his hand, the other rounding to hold onto the small of her back.
And when he began pulling at her to meet his thrusts up into her, she gasped, as quietly as she could, and let her head fall back. "Chuck…"
She felt his lips latch onto her neck and she whimpered, starting to bounce on him instead. Tightening her fist in his curls at the back of his head, she sat up straight and bounced faster, gasping his name when he began to thrust and meet her.
Her climax built quickly, and she lost control a little bit, hugging him tightly, turning her lips to his ear and letting him know how good he felt. She whispered encouragement and compliments, trying to build up his ego again after early this morning.
Sure, it hadn't been a big deal for her. But she'd realized belatedly that it had been a big deal for him. It had knocked him down a peg or two. She was going to build him up again.
"I'm almost there," she muttered into his hair as she stopped bouncing and instead began to ride him again, her hips swinging back and forth.
And when he tucked his hand under the robe and squeezed her ass, she climaxed. She shivered and let out a moan, trying to suppress it by clapping her hand over her mouth, and then she panted his name, slowing her thrusts and just sitting in his lap, slumping against him. "Oh my God," she breathed into his neck.
She eased her hips up when she finally regained a little control over her limbs, and then she carefully crawled out of his lap to stand again, pressing her hand to her forehead. "Oh my God," she repeated.
Chuck just sat back against his chair, all splayed out, a dreamy look on his face, looking like a complete meal. She inwardly laughed at herself and rolled her eyes. She was about to suggest they take it inside when she heard the sound of a sliding door. She didn't know if it was above, below, or beside her balcony, but she knew what it meant.
And Chuck must have too, especially when two voices sounded, because he sat up ramrod straight, his eyes popping out of his head practically. Sarah acted fast, her hand swooping down to scoop her panties off the ground and doing the same with Chuck's boxers.
She dashed for the door then and threw the boxers at him as he sprung out of the chair. He caught them and slammed them against his front, hobbling after her.
They dove into her room just in the nick of time and she shut the door after them, even going so far as to lock it, as if that would make any kind of difference.
And then she turned and saw that Chuck was still standing there, a little hunched over, his face red, hair mussed, still clutching his boxers over his groin. She burst into laughter.
Chuck blinked, then looked down at himself, then back up at her, and he joined in on the laughter.
And when the laughter finally died down between them a little, he just gave her his crooked grin and shook his head at her, closing the distance and cupping her face in his free hand, kissing her.
There was heat in it right off the bat, and she hummed, ready to walk him to the couch, or maybe they might be able to make it back to the bed in the other room…
But apparently not.
Because Chuck seemed not to have any intention of taking her to either of those places, and instead, he backed her up against the nearby table. She squeaked in surprise and giggled. "Wow…okay, someone's got his confidence back I guess."
He gave her an admonishing look full of teasing for just a moment, and then he kissed her even harder.
Sarah reached between them and plucked his boxers out of his grip, away from his front, and tossed them away, bobbing her eyebrows at him when he pulled out of the kiss and looked at her in surprise.
The surprise melted into complete and total lust then, and her heart raced as she saw him clench his jaw. And then she saw nothing else but the wall on the other side of the table, because just like that, he turned her around and bent her over. She held onto the edge of the table and whimpered as he carefully entered her from behind.
It was frenzied, intense, and electrifying. He ripped her robe off of her midway through and tossed it away, draping himself over her back and hugging her tightly, thrusting fast and hard.
She nearly lost the feeling in her fingers, she'd gripped the edge of the table so hard, but she went through a few climaxes before she felt him find his own release. They both collapsed onto the table afterwards, breathing hard. She groaned, flexing her fingers to try to get the blood back into them, and she turned her face into the table with a dorky "Phew".
Chuck just cursed, a snapped "fuck", and then a breathless chuckle to accompany it.
And when they finally pulled away from the table, Chuck seemed almost a little wobbly on his feet.
They finally collapsed into the bed in the next room over a minute later and just let themselves lie there in silence for a few minutes. She could still feel the blood rushing through her, she could hear it in her ears. And there was an electric current or something traversing up and down her arms and legs.
"D-Do you think…" Chuck took a deep, controlling breath, and she was pleased how out of breath he still seemed to be. "Do you think if we'd been caught having sex on your balcony, it would've gotten us kicked out of the hotel?"
"Maybe," she giggled, pressing her hands to her forehead. She was still sincerely floored by what had just happened. No one had ever done that to her. She never would've LET anyone do that to her. She'd kick their ass first.
And yet she'd just let Chuck turn her around and bend her over a table to take her from behind.
To say she'd enjoyed it would be such an understatement.
"Awesome," he chirped, and she laughed breathlessly. "At the risk of sounding like my future brother-in-law."
"You could do worse," she said, still chuckling.
"Yeah. I know. He's a good dude."
"I thought he was gonna punch that captain for you at one point."
Chuckling, he pushed himself to sit up, taking a deep breath and raking his fingers through his hair. "Nah, he's a lover, not a fighter."
"Reminds me of someone else I know."
He turned to give her an arched eyebrow over his shoulder. "Let's be real. I would have looked like a total douchebag if I'd punched that guy. And you would not have been into that. I have no business punching guys over you anyway."
"It's happened before. And you're right. I'm not into it." That was the truth. She'd slept with a partner on a mission a few years ago just the one time, and weeks later, he'd punched a guy she'd been sort of flirting with. When they weren't even on the same team anymore. It had been gross. "But jealousy is kinda cute on you…in moderation," she added that warning, lifting a finger.
Even that was a little difficult. She felt weak in the best way.
"The keyword, in moderation?" he asked, smiling.
"Exactly." She giggled.
There was an incessant buzzing sound then and they turned to look at one another in complete confusion for a moment before the reason for the buzzing kicked in. "Phone," Chuck said. "That'll be my phone."
She watched as he sat up and slowly eased himself to his feet. Once he seemed to realize his legs were working all right (she inwardly smirked at that), he found his boxers on the floor and stepped into them, before going for his pants from the night before and digging in the pocket.
"Ah. Future-bro-in-law." He answered it. "Yyyyyyello?" He winced and pulled the phone away from his ear before putting it back again, giving her a pitiable look. And he mouthed, "Too loud" to her. She giggled and shook her head.
"What d'ya mean?" He paused, his hair all mussed, lips pursed, confusion furrowing his brow. He was insanely cute in that very moment. "Oh! Does that mean you two want to have breakfast? Should I call Sarah and—oh. Uh. Heh. Well. Noted." He cleared his throat as Sarah gingerly pushed herself to sit up, and then he winced and covered the phone and lowered it away from his face. "Wanna come to breakfast?"
She glanced at the clock and snorted. "Brunch?"
"Tomato, tomahto."
His grin made her giggle. "Yeah, I need a shower first, though."
"Oh, hey, same." He pulled the phone back up. "We're on. But I'm gonna need a quick shower so meet in the lobby in a half hour?" He paused. "Right. Perfect. I'm starved. Okay, see you two then."
He hung up and sauntered back to the bed, plopping onto it next to her. She'd managed to manipulate the covers so that they were at least covering that part of her. She still had some modesty intact.
"What was that whole thing about?" she asked.
"What…oh. Right. The gig is up, Awesome says."
"The gig?" She raised an eyebrow.
"He said, and I quote, We know you are with her right now, bro, stop pretending you two aren't buckwilding. So that happened. The gig is up, they know we're buckwilding."
Sarah cracked up the moment buckwilding came out of his mouth. "You should correct him. For the record, we aren't buckwilding, we're knocking boots."
This time Chuck laughed.
"That's better?"
Wrinkling her nose with a grin, she shrugged. "I think it's a lot cuter. And still goes with that Old West theme he's got goin' on with buckwilding, don't you think?"
The way he looked at her, the smile on his face and the warmth in his brown eyes, was something she knew she'd think about for the rest of her life, no matter what happened here when this vacation was over. It was genuine affection. This guy liked her. Her. Not some facade she wore, not a character she was portraying for a mission. This wasn't a mark. He was a good guy who saw things in her she'd never even known were there.
He was oh so slowly coaxing out the best she had to offer.
The trick was whether or not she'd be able to coax it out of herself if he wasn't around anymore. Maybe that'd be the secret to her success as a non-assassin, a non-spy, away from the CIA.
"You're a lot cuter," he mumbled in a bit of a drawl, leaning in to give her a kiss that lasted a little longer than she'd expected. But then he broke it and pulled back with a quiet whining sound. "30 minutes. Well, less than that now. I'm gonna go and take a shower, but we'll see you in the lobby?"
Her voice caught in her throat.
And finally… "Uh yeah. Yes. See you down there. Soon."
Chuck pecked her on the cheek one more time and hurriedly scrambled for his clothes, throwing them back on and jauntily draping his suit jacket over his shoulder, dangling from one finger. She knew he was posing like that in a teasing way, like he was some sort of runway model, but the fact was that especially this morning, after he'd stayed the night, how rumpled all of it was, how satisfied the look on his face was, he was incredibly hot standing there. And she felt lucky that she was the girl in this position right at that moment, not some other girl who might've deserved it more.
And in that moment, she found herself thinking, oh well sucks for them.
With a wink, he whisked himself out of there. And she sat still, waiting for the thump of the suite door to shut, before she finally got out from under the covers to plod over to the bathroom for her shower.
She'd been so close to just dragging him to it with her. But she was still tentative at best about it. Something was stopping her still.
She was still afraid to let herself be that vulnerable with him. And she knew she was a hypocrite, being ridiculous, considering how vulnerable she'd already allowed her to be around him. Not just falling into a deep sleep with him in the same bed, but the way she let him pin her down when they were intimate. Something about being locked in a small room, behind a shower door, naked. Well, it just freaked her out.
And so she let him go back to his own suite to shower. Anyways, he'd need a change of clothes.
That was how she explained it to herself as she stepped into the spray of the shower and let it flood down over her head and body.
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"Eggs benedict."
Sarah looked over at Ellie with a bit of a furrowed brow. "Scuse me?"
The brunette was staring out over the water with an almost zombie-like look on her face. "I could really go for eggs benedict right now. Smothered in hollandaise. Just, like, smothered. I think I'm going to die if I don't get food in my stomach in the next five minutes."
Chuckling, Sarah put a friendly hand on Ellie's shoulder. "I'm sorry we've had to wait so long to be seated. I really thought this place would be more empty on a Tuesday in the middle of the day." She winced.
"No, it isn't your fault. I'm the one who insisted we get out of the hotel for food." She snorted. "Anyways, I'm just being melodramatic. I'll survive."
"You aren't as bad as your brother." Sarah tossed her thumb over her shoulder and Ellie leaned forward a bit to look.
Chuck was standing off to the side leaning heavily on Devon, one arm slung over the blonde's shoulders, moaning into his shoulder as the other man pat him reassuringly on the bicep. "It's okay, bro. We'll get food soon. Just hang in there," he was muttering as he scrolled through his phone with his free hand distractedly.
Sarah and Ellie giggled together and exchanged one of those inside joke looks Sarah was slowly getting addicted to.
They were finally directed to their table, pleased to note that the window was open and overlooking the French Riviera. The water was particularly aqua today as the sailboats sliced through it. She distantly thought a swim was in order.
But then her thoughts were interrupted by Ellie's voice from across the table. "A ha. Eggs benedict. Right here." Sarah watched as she triumphantly thumped her pointer finger on the menu. "Done."
"Well, that's good for you. There are like 50 pages on this menu. How am I supposed to choose?" Devon asked, frowning as he thumbed through the menu.
"Just get the yogurt and granola. Everything else on there doesn't fit into your workout routine." Smack! "Ow!" Chuck laughed as his future brother-in-law reached over the table to teasingly swat at the side of his head. "I'm just kidding! I wish I was even half as cut as you are."
"You could be. You just have to come to my sessions with me. I'd get you looking like a Nerd Brad Pitt, bro." Devon grinned.
"I love you, Awesome, I really do, but there's no way I have the discipline that you have. Anyways, I exercise enough. I can handle a good long run. I've got plenty of endurance where I need it." Chuck shrugged and shut his menu, having chosen what he would be ordering apparently.
"Yeeahhh, I bet you do," Devon drawled with that big grin of his that seemed to stretch across his entire face. And he winked at Sarah in particular.
"Why are you like this?" Ellie asked immediately around a piece of cinnamon bread.
He turned to look at her and shrugged as if he hadn't said anything wrong.
"Seriously. We need to talk about minding our business, what that means, what it looks like, how it sounds. Silence, Devon, it sounds like silence."
Sarah bit her cheek to keep from laughing. The delivery was perfect, the flat look on Ellie's face, the flat tone she used, and Devon's befuddled blinking.
Chuck piped up. "Oh, hey, the waitress! Great timing, Aimee!"
Their waitress slowed at their table and smiled politely, looking a little confused. They all put their orders in, gawking at Devon when he ordered two main dishes, and the conversation continued—a different one thankfully—when Aimee left again to put their orders in.
"Do you think people ever get tired of living in a paradise like this?" Ellie asked as the two men at the table carried on about some wedding prep Devon was thinking about.
"I don't know," Sarah said honestly. "Maybe they do if it's all they've known. I imagine someone who's raised in Jamaica, only known a small island their whole life, probably wants to get out of there at a certain point, don't you think?"
"Fair." She sighed. "Sometimes I wish I'd chosen a different profession. Low key admission. Don't tell my patients." She winced and Sarah giggled.
"Why's that?"
"So I could travel more. See the world. See places like this, but also, I've been wanting to do a medical trip to maybe the Asian continent. Or Africa. But to just have the opportunity to take off and explore and not have the career get in the way? Ugh, sounds like heaven." She gave Sarah a sardonic look. "You know, it was total hell trying to get time for this vacation. Devon and I rarely get the same days off. I barely see the guy and we're getting married soon. So this trip was practically a miracle."
"It was that hard to get off for a trip?"
"Oh God yeah. I think we were only really able to do it because Robert—my superior at the hospital—could see that I was this close to just having a meltdown. I was about to snap, honestly. I was about to just, like, explode."
Sarah giggled. "I'm glad he was aware enough to let you outta there."
"It was to his benefit, and really, everyone else's. Let's be honest. Nobody wants an over-exhausted, pissed off surgeon playing with their brain."
"Uhhhh, no. Pass."
Ellie snorted. "Exactly." She widened her eyes. "Do you like it?" she asked then after a bit of a pause.
"What?"
"Your job. How you get to travel the world and experience all of these other cultures, speak all of these languages… It must be lovely." Ellie's smile was wistful and sweet, but Sarah still felt a pang in her chest. If only Ellie knew.
"Uhhh…yeah, it's…You know, I've seen a lot of different places, which is great. The problem is that I-I don't usually get to really see a place, experience it…as much as you'd think." She bit her lip and looked out at the water. "This is the first time I'm really seeing everything."
"Oh. They have you working hard, huh?"
Sarah lifted both eyebrows. "That's the job. No time to breathe. Especially when you're good at it, the way I am. It's hard to allot even a few seconds to look around. I've been all over the world, never really saw it."
"And Nice?" Ellie asked, leaning her chin on her palm. "You're seeing Nice?"
"Mhm." The ex-spy looked out over the water again.
"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." Chuck leaned in and bumped her shoulder with his, earning a bit of a smirk from her.
"Did you just quote Ferris Bueller at her?" Ellie asked, chuckling and shaking her head. Sarah fixed her with wide eyes and she held her hands up defensively. "I'm still on your non-nerd team, Sarah, don't worry. It's just that I was forced to watch that freaking movie with Chuck so many times when we were kids it's trapped in my brain."
Sarah laughed.
"It's a good quote," Devon chirped.
"Thank you, Awesome." Chuck got a thumbs up from the blonde for that.
Their food arrived a few minutes later thankfully, because she and Chuck exchanged a few looks about the verging-on-hangry turn Ellie was starting to take.
The meal was packed away in quick order, too, finishing two mimosas each, before they all sat back in their comfortable chairs and let the breeze grace their faces. As Sarah opened her eyes and looked out on the horizon, though, she saw clouds approaching.
"Uh oh. Those look like there'll be rain in a few hours," she warned, pointing over Ellie's shoulder. They all looked.
"We'll survive," Chuck said. "I love a good Mediterranean rain."
"I'd been planning on a swim," Sarah informed them, a bit of a pout on her face.
"I might have a solution. We can still swim, but use that super fancy pool back at the hotel instead. If the clouds come and the rain starts, we just get out and go inside." Sarah must've stayed quiet long enough after her offer that Ellie got a tentative look on her face. "Sorry, I just shoved us into your plan." She winced, but before Sarah could correct her, she continued. "If you'd planned on swimming solo, having some well-earned 'me time', I totally get that."
"No, no." Sarah thrust a hand out. "That's a good idea, moving my plans to the pool. I can get a bit of sun, too, before the clouds get here. And I'd love some company."
Ellie got a bright look on her face, but then she looked dubious again. "You sure?"
"Yeah, of course!"
That was how Sarah found herself walking down to the pool area, pushing open the gate and glancing around at the lounge chairs lined up in rows on either side of the pool to see if she could spot the Bartowskis and "Captain Awesome". Chuck had sent her a text while she was lathering herself with sunscreen before she stepped into her bikini. He and Devon were already by the pool and Ellie was grabbing them all a few "beachy draaaaanks". She'd smirked and rolled her eyes as she'd texted back that she'd be right down.
And there he was, alone on one of the chairs, his towel laid out under him as he sat forward and swept his T-shirt up over his head in one quick move. It got a little caught on his sunglasses and she giggled to herself, walking around the pool towards him.
With a hotel towel under one arm, her fingers on her other hand hooked in the straps of her flip flops, she padded barefoot across the damp pavement and approached. "Need some help there, buddy?"
He got his shirt off and fixed his sunglasses, a sheepish look on his face. "Oh. Hey, uh…didn't see ya comin'. Ahem." He tossed his shirt to the end of the lounge chair and scooted back to drape himself across it. "I'm good. Hehe."
Grinning, she gestured at the chairs on either side of him. "Which…one is open?" she asked, since both had towels over them as if they were both taken.
"Oh! This-This one. I got you a towel and laid it out for ya already."
"A bit presumptuous, don't you think?" she asked, sitting down on the chair he singled out. He blinked, obviously not getting that she was messing with him. "Chuck, I'm kidding. That was sweet of you."
"Hah! Oh!" He laughed. "Sorry, maybe I already got too much sun."
She pointedly swept her gaze down his body and back up again, flirtatiously pushing her sunglasses down to her nose so that she could peer at his body unobstructed by her aviators. "Did you?"
He gave her a look. "Is that a crack about me being pale? Because I get it, I don't get out much even though I live in LA."
Sarah laughed. "Chuck…" She shook her head, and then gave him a questioning look. He was sincere, she realized. And she huffed, shaking her head at him for a different reason. "You really don't know how hot you are, do you? Like, you sincerely don't see it." And she reached across the foot or so of space between their chairs and let her fingers rest lightly on his tanned abdomen, feeling his muscles twitch there. "This right here is very nice, and I promise you I'm not just saying that to be kind." She slipped her fingers down to play with the tie at the front of his swim trunks.
He leaned across the space between them and pressed his lips to hers, surprising her a little.
"You want us to get chairs on the other side of the pool?"
They broke apart and Sarah blushed at the sound of Devon's cheeky voice, pulling her lips back between her teeth as she glanced to the side and down to find the built blonde in the pool a few feet away, his arms leaning on the cement as he watched them with a massive, shit-eating grin.
"Mind ya business," Chuck snapped with teasing frustration, and she saw a pleased smile tugging at the edge of his lips.
"Oh, him? Mind his business?" Ellie snarked as she approached, a waiter walking behind her with a tray of what looked like margaritas. "That's like asking a politician to stop lying."
"Oof. Ouch, sis."
"He knows I'm playing." She knelt down in her bikini and pushed at her fiancé's wet head, earning a snicker from him as he splashed her feet mischievously. "Margaritas for everyone. Merci, Frederic." She pulled a tip from…honestly, Sarah wasn't sure where, and handed it to him. The look on his face was for more than just the tip, but he hastened away fast enough that Devon didn't notice, or if he did, he was being kind in pretending he didn't.
Sarah knew she had no business noticing, but the way Chuck's future brother-in-law lifted himself out of the pool with just a quick hop and the strength in his arms and shoulders, the water dripping down his absolutely ripped body as he did so, reminded her of that time she'd sat in the hotel room and watched an episode of Baywatch while her dad was on a job. He'd halfheartedly reprimanded her when he came in at the end of the episode. But he hadn't cared enough to really dictate what she watched.
Either way, Sarah was quick to turn her gaze to her margarita. The only thing she allowed herself to think at that point was that it was incredibly impressive he could work a heart surgeon's crazy schedule and still have time to workout enough that his body looked like that.
The drink hit the spot either way, and Sarah swung her legs up onto the lounge chair and reclined back against the towel Chuck had laid out for her. She sipped the margarita and sighed, shutting her eyes and relishing in the sun's rays cascading over her bikini-clad body and her face. It felt good, what with the way the breeze was slowly starting to pick up. That meant the clouds would arrive sooner, damnit.
As she opened her eyes to take another sip, she saw that Chuck was sitting up, grunting quietly at the effort of trying to apply sunscreen to his back. He was ineffectually slapping at his upper back with his hand, unable to reach any lower.
Giggling, she set her margarita down on the small round table behind their chairs and sat up, swinging her legs to the side and getting up to quickly maneuver herself onto his chair, sitting behind him. "Stop. You look like you're about to dislocate your shoulder. Let me."
He stopped and turned to look at her. "Oh. Oh, yeah. Thanks!"
"Sure."
Sarah felt Ellie's gaze on them even though the other woman was facing forward, as if she was watching in glee out of the corner of her eye, Devon in the chair between the siblings, laid back and none the wiser.
She squirted the white substance into her hand and immediately began to slowly rub the stuff over his shoulders, his upper back, lower back, and around his waist, hips, his sides, really feeling every last ripple of muscle and soft, smooth skin.
Chuck let out a little groan as she went back to his shoulders and gave him a gentle massage. "I'd be okay with you doing that a little harder, if I'm bein' honest," he muttered over his shoulder, and she smirked pushing her thumbs into his muscles in his upper back a bit harder. He groaned again and she giggled.
"Don't forget to put sunscreen on your ears," Ellie said in an affected mom-voice, and she earned a blush and a glare from her brother, which made her laugh. "He always forgets his ears and then he walks around with 'em all bright red."
"Thanks so much. No please, Ellie, keep going."
Sarah chuckled and reached up to put sunscreen on his ears. "There. Now you get white ears."
They all laughed as she lathered it on, and Chuck leaned away from her to rub it in properly, shaking his head at her antics.
After a good fifteen minutes or so of tanning, Sarah crawled up from her chair and stood to her full height, stretching her arms over her head. The water was too inviting to ignore, she decided.
She could feel Chuck's eyes on her behind his sunglasses as she walked to the steps of the pool and went in, sighing softly at how good it felt on her hot, sun-baked skin. And she immediately pulled her sunglasses off and dunked her head under, emerging again and blinking the water away from her eyes, smoothing her hair back and putting her sunglasses back on. He was still watching her. She still had that spy sense of hers, she could feel when someone was watching.
This wasn't that hair raising on the back of your neck type of feeling though. It made her feel warm. She went to the deeper end of the pool and sank down so the water covered her mouth, enjoying the cool water. She eyed the still approaching clouds in the distance and then flicked her gaze back to Chuck again.
He was finally getting out of his chair, fixing his swim trunks. He turned to say something to his family, and then he went to the edge of the pool and turned, kneeling down and using his arms and shoulders to ease himself into the water there rather than using the steps the way she had.
Sarah let herself smirk, the water obscuring it. And she stared at the ripple of his muscles in his shoulders and back. He disappeared under the water then and she knew what was coming as his figure then traversed the space between them, approaching her underwater like some sort of sexy sea monster.
And when he reached her, his arms wound around her torso, his face pressed into her stomach, and he stood up to his full height, lifting her out of the water along with him. She squealed and held onto his curls in two tight fists. "Stop!" she laughed. "What are you doing?"
"I have a lifeguard license. I'm just making sure you're not drowning," he chirped.
"Drowning? The deepest this pool gets is five feet," she said, grabbing his shoulder in one hand because his hair didn't feel secure enough. Granted, she trusted Chuck not to drop her—
But then she felt him heave, and she flew a good four feet away from him and plunged backwards into the water.
Here she'd been trusting him not to drop her and he'd thrown her instead.
The jerk.
She came up from the water sputtering, and she dunked herself again to fix her hair out of her eyes, laughing as she emerged once more. "You freaking asshole!" she exclaimed, and she lunged for him, causing him to yelp as he cracked up.
They wrestled then, and as Sarah dunked Chuck's head, she wound her strong legs around his torso, one hand on his head, the other on his shoulder. He burst from the water once he got his footing and threw her off of his back as she gasped in surprise, and she splooshed back into the pool.
Using the element of surprise was her best bet, she decided as she stayed under, and she creeped close to him with a mermaid kick of her legs, grabbing his ankles and yanking his feet out from under him.
When she emerged, she heard Ellie crack up with a, "Yes, Sarah!"
She shrugged at the other woman with a smirk and that was how Chuck managed to tackle her back into the water. While they were under, one of his hands squeezed her thigh while he stole a kiss no one else would be able to see.
It was unfair, but not nearly as unfair as the way he pulled away from her then, and got out of the pool altogether.
They sat on their chairs, letting the sun dry them, for another whole hour or so.
She felt the droplets on her skin when they'd been by the pool for a good two hours. First one on her knee, then another few on her chest, her abdomen, and finally a drop right on her nose.
Opening her eyes, she realized it had gotten a little more breezy and chilly, and the sky had gotten darker, the sun covered by the grey clouds that had finally arrived, hovering over Nice.
"Oh boy, it's raining," Devon muttered as all four of them climbed up out of their chairs and grabbed their things.
"Well, pool time is over!" Ellie chirped, gathering up everyone's towel in her arms and hurrying over to push them into the dirty towel bin. Others were clearing out of the area around them.
They made it back inside of the hotel right as the rain actually began to start. Not a downpour per se, just a light rain. But the way the clouds looked, she thought this could become a downpour.
The foursome stepped into the elevator then and Sarah bit her lip as she neglected to press the button for her own floor. Nobody seemed to think anything of it as they said their goodbyes on Ellie and Devon's floor, and Chuck and Sarah were alone in the elevator, heading up to his floor.
She'd have to go to her suite and take a shower eventually. She had nothing to wear besides her bikini and a light cover-up. She was covered in chlorine. But she didn't want to go to her own suite. She wanted to stay with him.
And he didn't seem all that eager to get rid of her either.
When they stepped into his suite, Chuck cleared his throat. "Hey, uh…listen. You can…if you want…you can use my shower. It's all yours. If you wanna get the chlorine off of you. You'd probably be more comfortable."
Sarah turned to face him and smiled. The offer was sincere, she knew. And she'd used his shower before. She didn't have anything to put on after the shower, though. That was the problem. And yet that wasn't what she was thinking about.
She was thinking about the fact that Chuck needed to shower, too. He was also covered in chlorine. He would also be uncomfortable until he showered. And nerves were mounting in her as she swallowed thickly. "Yeah. Actually, I think I will take you up on that…if you don't mind…"
"Nah, of course I don't mind. I'm offering. It's all yours. I'll take mine after." He walked around her then and she kept her eyes on him, her brain going a mile a minute, the nerves still there. "Let me grab you one of these extra towels, here. A washcloth."
She followed him through the bedroom doors to the bathroom, stopping at the entrance and leaning against the doorframe, watching him fumble around.
"Got all the shampoo and soap in the shower already and—Well, it's all here. So help yourself."
Was she doing this? Was she really doing this?
For years, there was a locked door between her and anyone else whenever she stepped into a shower. She'd learned it from her father before she was even recruited into the CIA as a teenager. A locked door and a knife on whatever horizontal surface was within reach in the actual shower. Sure, she'd had to replace knives for rust because of it. But she didn't fuck around. It was similar to sleeping but worse in a lot of ways. She didn't sleep naked.
She did shower naked.
It was the perfect place for someone to get the upper hand. To take advantage of her vulnerability.
It was scarier than sex, even, because the shower was her ultimate escape. It was where she let her guard down. Her ultimate safe space.
Was she really considering letting someone into that safe space?
"Thank you," she muttered with a small smile as he grinned at her and cleared his throat. And as he moved past her, squeezing by so close to her that his T-shirt brushed against her hip, Sarah's hand moved of its own volition and her fingers clamped down around his wrist, stopping him in the doorway with her.
She turned to face him and looked up into his questioning eyes.
Sarah Walker, erstwhile CIA assassin, ignored the nerves tingling in her chest, her fingers, her toes, and she bit her lip. She was nuts for doing this.
Or maybe she was nuts for being this terrified of letting this trustworthy, good man in further than she'd ever let anyone else, further than she'd promised herself she would ever let anyone else.
She was breaking her promise.
And still she said:
"Stay here. With me."
He blinked.
Sarah took his hand and pulled him towards the shower with her.
Hope you're all keeping safe. If you would let me know what you think about this chapter, I'd appreciate it. Trying to write in the bits of time between life that I can find. Thank you for reading!
SSC
