Knox: Jaune's turn baby!
King: And you say I take a long time.
Knox: Now I'm just like SoundSmith~
King: Sure...
Knox: You know the drill! Let's do this!
/\
It was time for the next round of stereotypes. Each of the students were sitting in their chairs, excited to see where this goes weird.
The screen opened to show a Jaune dancing down the same trainline the rest had, dressed similarly to the version they saw on the big screen that kicked this whole thing off.
"Alright! Jaune Arc, the healer-slash-tank designed to be hold points and keep enemies at bay. That means they're all team players willing to support their teams, right? Well, kind of. Let's talk about it."
The first hat appeared in the form of a full plate helmet over his head with face revealed, [Knight Sights].
Nora's arm shot up, "Mine!"
Sun rose his hand as well, "Same here."
"These are the Jaune mains that know what they are and what they're supposed to do. These are the guys that get shit done. They've played the class long enough to know their place is on the point or escorting the cart. That said, they can get pretty bad tunnel vison and ignore anything that isn't the objective. Back them up and they'll be an unmovable wall."
Nora pumped her fist into the air, "YES! Awesome one!"
Jaune had considered picking that one, but it was just edged out by another hat in the set.
The hats swapped to show Jaune with his hair under control and slicked down slightly, [Corporate Cut].
Weiss raised her hand slightly, "I selected this one."
Yang crossed her arms and tilted her head slightly in thought, "This one seems familiar."
"The Corporate Cut is for the Jaune mains with one big difference from the rest. They're masochists."
Yang burst out into laughter as Weiss's paled shock. She had to take a few deep breaths to be able to speak again, "Something you want to tell us, Ice Queen?"
Weiss growled at Yang's attempt to make things worse.
"Hear me out. You have to be a masochist to pair in a cue with a Weiss main."
Yang was still laughing but came back to a realization. "Oh yeah. It was on the big screen. With the white Prince Charming coat."
Ruby thought back before she smiled. "Oh right! I remember that."
Weiss groaned to herself, still not happy about her version's underlying stereotype.
"That's the usual for the Corporate Cut Jaunes. Next hat!"
The next hat to appear showed Jaune with a headband with a lime green heart over his forehead. His hair was substantially wilder, losing all sense of control, [The Worldly].
Yang chuckled as she raised her hand. "Mine. And if I had to guess…"
"Jojo…"
"Knew it."
"This guy is not taking anything in the game seriously. Guy's just here to fuck around and have fun. Somehow, he'll still have one of the highest scores on the board though… That said, if there's a Star Gold Yang anywhere in the server, you can expect that to drop significantly. Those two will just be off fighting each other rather than actually playing any objectives."
"Makes sense." Ren nodded, "If memory serves, the hats are based on the two that fought in the version we saw on screen. So, if it's a fictional show that people enjoy that much, they'll run with it. Like when you find someone else who enjoys the same series."
The next hat to make an appearance was a blue knit cap covered in yellow stars with a horseshoe set over his forehead, [Go Jauney, Go].
Yang started to laugh again. "Well, that's different."
Ruby raised a hand to the sky, "My pick!"
"JoJo."
This caught Yang off guard for half a second but thought back over the other weird hats with that label. She nodded and chuckled to herself.
"This is the Jaune that's an all-around okay guy, but quick to bouts of selfishness. He'll abandon the objective to pursue some kind of personal objective. Be it a contract, revenge kill, or whatever."
Ruby groaned and huffed in her chair.
Yang chuckled a little.
They could hear Knox flipping through papers. "Okay… There's usually only one JoJo hat, but Yang had two. And considering Yang is the punchy one, she'll have the most, right?"
The next hat had Jaune with long blonde hair that curled into full circles around his collar, [Mr. President].
"Fucking… Seriously?!"
Yang burst out into laughter, "I guess that's another JoJo thing."
Coco lowered her glasses a bit to get a better look at the style, "You know, Arc… You could actually look pretty good with longer hair. Maybe not that specifically, but still."
Jaune sighed, "I'll keep that in mind."
Yang looked around, "Anyone pick this?" No reply from her friends was all the answer she needed.
"JoJo. This guy has to be first for everything. New weapon, he picks it up and figures out all the little ins and outs. He might not tell you what he's done, but it'll get to you eventually as more people follow his lead. It's his greatest pride at this point."
The next hat came onto the screen and showed Jaune with a white military cap with his family symbol on the front, [Defender].
Neptune tapped his chair's armrest. "I got this one."
Yang chuckled, "Bet it's a tryhard hat."
"Defenders are the types that seem to forget they have weapons. His shield is always out and placed forward. This will usually result in getting backstabbed pretty often. He's not great with situational awareness is what I'm saying."
To prove the point, a clip showed Knox, playing as Yang, killing a Nora and a Blake right behind their team's Jaune without him noticing.
Nora laughed, both at the scene and the guy that picked it.
Neptune sighed and sunk in his seat.
The scene swapped to show the next hat. It showed Jaune with longer hair paired with a red ribbon over his forehead and tied in the back, a bit of ribbon hanging down from it. [One Man Army]
Blake's hand raised slightly, "I picked this one."
Yang chuckled a bit, "I could see that."
"Okay, this a War Pig in the worst way. This Jaune thinks he'll never die! Even if he's the only on the point against a full team while his own team is dead or running to the point. He thinks he can fight the entire the enemy team by himself but will usually end up dead for it."
Yang sputtered before laughing.
Blake groaned a little in embarrassment, but not for too long. It was a dumb little joke video after all.
The next hat to pop up showed Jaune with a crown seemingly made of miniature swords, [King of Swords] (by PrankK1ng).
No one seemed to have claimed this one.
"King of Swords Jaunes are different depending on the colors you get it painted."
The paints changed along the small hilts as he spoke.
"Bright metallic colors are usually good leaders and decent fighters. Dark or muted colors are Blake mains that don't realize they're not playing a stealth character anymore. Seriously guys, he's twice Blake's size! You can't hide behind the boxes!"
Yang laughed and imagined Jaune trying to stealth around like Blake.
The next hat had Jaune wearing a knight's helmet like the Night Sights, however this helmet had a long plume of hair like a ponytail descending from the back of the armored headpiece, [Knight's Honor] (by unknown).
Coco raised a hand slightly at her wrist, "Mine."
Pyrrha smiled a bit, "I picked this one as well, actually."
"Oh yeah?" Coco grinned, "Cool."
"Oh boy… Okay! Knight's Honor was a promotional item, so it's pretty hard to find these days. But if you do see it, then it's pretty safe to say they're one of two people. Either they're masters in the trading scene or they're stupidly rich."
Coco chuckled a bit, "That's all? Was kind of hoping for more."
The hats changed again to show Jaune with a long braid in his hair ended by a small tuft of hair at the end, [Dragon's Whisker].
Ren spoke up this time, "I selected this one."
"Dragon's Whisker Jaunes are the types that watch all those martial arts movies. They usually play Ren or Sun, but they had to swap over to Jaune for the game."
Ren shrugged and wasn't about to deny that he enjoyed a good martial arts movie now and then.
The next hat showed Jaune with another knight-themed helmet. This one came in the form of a skull with open jaw showing Jaune's face between the skull and jaw, [Revenant].
No claims.
"Ready for it?"
Cue the shaking screen and edgy music.
Yang laughed again, "I could guess that."
And then the scene returned to the dancing Jaune, "And that's it for this one."
Nora gasped in insult, "What about Jaune and Velvet?! They didn't get to see theirs!"
"Nora!" Jaune shouted and tried to get his teammate back under control.
"Now, remember, if you didn't see a hat you personally liked there is a video at the end to clean up any loose extras. So, keep an eye out for that. Until then, next up is Nora. This should be interesting… See you all then."
Nora sat back down again with a huff. "I guess that's okay…"