Farnese was looking for Casca. It was something she had done before, but with a sense of panic instead of the annoyance she felt now. When Casca was still in her regressed state Farnese did everything with her (or for her, depending on how one looked at it), If she didn't there was a good chance Casca would wander off, which wouldn't be good for anyone.
Now Casca was sane and they still did most things together, more out of habit than necessity. They had become friends, or at least Farnese thought of her as a friend. Before joining Guts' group, Farnese hadn't had really any friends (besides Serpico) much less women her own age. From the way Casca talked it was a similar case, having woman friends, not just friends in general.
So even though they didn't need to, Farnese and Casca still bathed together, Schierke and Isma too if they felt like it. With the dangers that always found them and the rate at which they traveled it just made sense to bathe at the same time. The boys had another set up, Farnese wasn't completely sure what it was, beside Isidro still being immature enough to try and avoid baths for as long as possible.
So now Farnese was going to take her bath; hopefully Casca was already at the spot and had just forgotten to tell her. Or maybe she just wanted to be alone. Casca would sometimes do that, just go off to be by herself. It had given Guts a near heart attack, Farnese as well the first time she did it, not realizing nobody was used to that yet. Now she always told somebody where she was, despite thinking it was a little silly. Another possibility tugged at Farnese's mind, that Guts was with her. Involuntarily, her heart twinged.
Farnese had seen what Guts and Casca's relationship had been before the eclipse, and it was obvious Casca was the dearest thing to Guts' heart, but… her feelings now weren't so clear. Farnese was sure they loved each other, no doubt about that, but did they love each other in that way? Because while they did spend a great deal of time with one another, there was never any indication they did anything other than whatever they said they were doing (which was often just talking), and when they were with the rest of the group they never acted like how a couple would act. They would argue about so many things, often inconsequential things like a misplaced whetstone or stuff that the group had never really questioned, like Guts' recklessness in battle. It was always off to the side, out of the way. They would both raise their voices and afterwards pout, but despite that they never stayed angry and always made up. Most of the time the fighting seemed to make Guts almost happy, perhaps reminding him of a simpler, or at least more pleasant time (if Casca's memories were anything to base off of).
Although whenever children were brought up they acted strangely, but that was because of their child. It was strange to think of Guts as someone who had a child, but at the same time it wasn't. It was the same with Casca; now that she was back she was probably the most responsible (outside of Serpico, that it), but Farnese still sometimes thought of her as her regressed state. They had been, may still be parents, and they weren't much older than Farnese was. It was a sobering thought.
It bothered Farnese. Partially their relationship, partially her jealousy. She had feelings for Guts, an admiration mixed with gratitude mixed with something amorous. She sometimes wished she didn't, but she couldn't help it. And Casca was her friend, which made the jealousy even worse. Whatever Guts and Casca's relationship be, they needed each other and Farnese didn't want to cause any unnecessary hurt. So ultimately she hated her jealousy.
Farnese stepped over a fallen tree that was on the path to the stream where the baths were being taken. It was a short walk from their current camp, a little out of ear range unless one shouted which was a little worrisome, but not enough to move camp closer where the ground was more muddy. She was taken out of her thoughts by a dark figure approaching her.
It was Guts with a strangely content expression on his face. He wasn't wearing any armor, just what looked like fresh bandages on his torso, pants, and a belt with a knife on it.
Once Casca had come back he had become an almost completely different person, no, that wasn't right, he just became less sullen and more open. He actually laughed and smiled, something that had startled everyone at first, Sure he had done those things before, but now it was without the underlying bitterness and sorrow.
It was nice to see him so happy.
"Good afternoon." Farnese greeted once they were close enough. She noticed his hair was wet.
"Oh." Guts said, "Hey."
"Have you seen Casca around?" She asked, "We were going to wash up, but I haven't been able to find her."
"Yeah she's there right now." He answered, a dazed happy look briefly passing over his eyes, "We were doing laundry."
"Oh, Thank you."
He nodded before continuing back to camp. Farnese walked forward, muddying her boots up in the process and she arrived at the shore of the stream. It was a medium sized river, coming up to Farnese's waist at the deepest. Casca was already in the water, her clothes drying on some rocks on the bank along with what looked like some of Guts' clothes. She was about to call out to Casca when she noticed something strange.
Peculiar dark spot were on Casca's neck and shoulders, barely visible because of her dark skin. They looked like bruises or some sort of rash. Farnese took a step closer and the crunch from her foot alerted Casca to her presence. Casca turned around to reveal her front which also had the marks.
"Farnese-"
"Casca! Are you okay?" Farnese interrupted, fearing the worst.
Casca blushed as she asked, "What are you talking about?"
"Those bruises, or spots are they some kind of disease? I heard about some pox that gave you spots that was deadly! How long have they been there? I can try and heal it, although I've had more practice with injuries… but I'll try my best." Farnese finished with, "I understand you not wanting us to worry, but I don't want you to die!" They were a little fragmented, her thoughts that it, but Farnese was so worried.
Casca looked down at her body and muttered something before answering, "These aren't, I mean, ah-"
Casca was walking toward her and then Farnese could see the spots on her inner thigh. Bruise like marks, collected in certain areas, Guts having been there, Casca being so flustered… oh. That would mean…
"I'm sorry!" Farnese said and promptly turned around. She went to take a step when-
"You don't have to leave." Casca said, "I've actually been meaning to talk to you." She rinsed off the remaining soap before walking to the shore.
Farnese didn't leave, in fact her feet felt stuck to the ground. There were a few moments of silence before Casca started, "I know you have feelings for Guts," Farnese blushed out of embarrassment, "and I also know he is incredibly dense about most things. And I know what it's like to love somebody who will never see you that way, and while Guts would never intentionally hurt you, to keep pursuing it would leave you feeling, empty, hollow, a shell. Don't blindly follow someone, figure out what you want, and-" Casca said the next part quieter, "Don't miss what right in front of you. Live your life."
Farnese turned to look at Casca directly to see she had donned a tunic, her other clothes probably needing longer to dry.
"I'm sorry." Farnese said again.
"No, don't apologise for your feelings. And I'm not saying go jump into Rodericks, or even Serpico's arms, but look beyond him. Look to where you want to be." After pausing a moment Casca sighed, "I'm sorry, that was pretty heavy, I didn't mean- I just, I just wish someone had told me that when I was your age. It may have changed things."
That man, the one Guts hated, the one that branded him and Casca, the one that did that to Casa, that was who she was talking about. The Hawk of Darkness. Her enemy as a friend of Guts and Casca and as a magic user.
After thinking a moment, Farnese responded with, "I want to be helpful, to become better at magic. I want to be strong."
Casca smiled and Farnese blushed for what felt like the millionth time, but this time it wasn't out of shame. There was a warmth and pride in Casca's smile that made Farnese feel like she accomplished something, like someone was proud to know her. After so long of being an unwanted, unliked person… well it was nice.
"What do you want now?" Farnese asked, "If you don't mind my asking."
"Honestly," Casca said, "I don't know exactly. I want to find my son, which may not even be possible now, I want to be free of this brand, I want to kill that SOB that made all of this happen, and I want Guts to stop almost dying every other week. They all seem impossible right now. But before I can do any of those things I have to get stronger." She smiled again, "So I guess we have a few things in common."
Farnese smiled along this time. It was nice having a friend.
A/N: If you can't tell I have trouble writing interactions between more than two people at a time… welp. Yeah, I see Casca and Farnese becoming good friends once Casca gets her mind back. And there is definitely a parallel between Farnese's feelings for Guts and Casca's feelings for Griffith. Casca would start to call Guts our on his recklessness, which would give them both nostalgia, which depending on the moment would leave them happy or depressed. Originally this had some Farnesca sort of feels from Farnese side because I thought it would be interesting if Farnese's feelings shifted from Guts to Casca (or both of them) but I feel that would be too cruel, and not what I would want to read (and I write what I want to read). Also only Serpico knows they're related, Casca just saw how close they are and assumed. I personally think it would be cool if Farnese warmed up to Roderick and they became married just because in the long run it would help out everyone, but I get why they wouldn't.
(This next part is sort of my canon on the Gutsca relationship for the purposes of this story)
Also on Guts and Casca's relationship, they are intimate eventually (it doesn't start until a while after Casca returns). Some people show Casca's trauma by her not wanting to be touched like Guts, but I feel that wouldn't be it, since she was fine when women or children touched her. She would definitely have some PTSD and for a while it really would just be her and guts talking through everything, figuring out what they wanted and the future, something they never did before. Her body might want something, but her mind would remind herself of the eclipse (or vice versa) but eventually yes. This isn't even touching on Guts' can of worms. Before they do anything intimate, he has to get the beast of darkness under control, which having Casca back might do. It was basically saying you'll never have her back, go kill more go kill griffith, and now Casca is back and giving him support and they are on their way to kill Griffith. The beast might lose it's power because of love. I think that it wouldn't even be a cop out for love to shackle the beast or set it 'free'. Especially parental love.