Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach. It's property of Tite Kubo.

Author's Note: Hi! I'm so glad you enjoyed the first prompt! I read all of your reviews and I was so excited at how you guys had received it. Thank you very much for reading and reviewing!

I just want to say that if there are any questions about the vibe of the story, I hope the next one-shots will clear things up. And of course there are going to be flashbacks eventually to explain a few more things. There is one coming up real soon. However, there are others who will jump into the future. I will be giving you heads up so you don't get confused.

As for today's one-shot, this time it is in Ichigo's POV and it takes place a few months after the previous story. It does not have much plot and it is very introspective, but it will eventually tie into another part of the story.

Again, thank you so much for your support!

See you!

Reviews

PolarBearManny: Thank you so much for everything! You almost made me cry!

Guest 1: Thank you so much! Glad you liked it!

Kenseix969: Thank you very much! I'm glad that you like how I characterize them. I tended to worry if they were OOC, but nowadays I write them the way I feel they were when reading Bleach, if that makes sense. I'm so very happy you liked it. Thanks again!

Guest 2: Thank you! It was ironically shorter than many previous works, but I'm glad you took the time to read it and that you enjoyed it. I hope you like this next chapter too.

Trashpanda7676: Thank you so much! Glad you liked it!

Kiefsouls119: Thank you so much! Yeah, after the ending fics with Orihime increased, but there are really many good fanfics out there. And if you like IR I could always recommend you authors and fics out there which are incredible and that you might enjoy.

piercingskies: Thanks! Here it is!

ZeldAshe: Thank you! And, haha, yes, Renji kinda is, isn't he? lol And yeah, IR for the win!

471Glaceongirl: Hey! Yeah, same! I still hate that ending very much. But I'm glad me and other writers are able to sooth that wound a little writing for IchiRuki. Thank you for reviewing!

Guest 3: Thank you! I'm happy you liked it!

shimmysammy: I absolutely love that line. Thanks for reviewing!

to be (the man in your heart)

Prompt: fantasy vs reality

Summary: Everybody sees Ichigo the way they want to see him. But only Rukia sees him whole.

"Today we're going to talk about the hero's journey," the professor drawls out one cloudy August morning, ignorant of the blank stares and yawning coming from his students. He probably thinks he's being engaging enough, completely unaware that he has already lost his students.

Even Ichigo feels lost before the introduction.

He would probably have paid more attention if he hadn't felt so drowsy.

Then again, it's barely eight am on a Friday.

And he doesn't know precisely why, but lately it has been hard to focus on anything more than a couple of minutes. He hopes this doesn't get reflected on his grades though. He doesn't need a repeat of his less than stellar grades the last year and a half of high school.

He can't help but curse himself for choosing to attend an early morning class.

Although it's not like it is entirely his fault.

By all means, this class was supposed to be engaging. Or at least Ichigo had been excited to take it when he had enrolled in a course about folktales, particularly Western ones. The purpose of this class is not only to study tales from European cultures, but to analyze them according to different approaches and literary theories. As someone majoring in English Literature, this class had seemed essential and Ichigo had not hesitated to take it. Now he realizes it is less about the folktales and more about the theory of what makes something a story.

Which is not really what he had wanted to study. But… can't do anything about it now.

There have been only two other classes, as it is the beginning of the semester. They haven't really done much so far, but today, they are apparently starting with the basics. This means they are studying the monomyth, also known as the hero's journey, a way to categorize stories featuring heroes. Because in most folktales, heroes are the protagonists of stories, and everyone else is just someone there to help the hero or to oppose them.

(Ichigo hates this idea)

"But before we start, can anybody tell me what a hero is?" The professor asks, interrupting his lecture and startling his sleepy students.

Have we mentioned that Ichigo hates heroes?

It is definitely too early in the morning to think in general, much less about such a contrived term. But yet, here he is. In this class he himself had chosen to take. Past Ichigo had been such an idiot, huh?

Before he can continue down this line, a girl suddenly raises her hand, distracting him from his musings.

"Yes, Yamada-san?" The professor calls her.

"A hero is the person who saves the day in a story." She obediently recites, as if she had memorized her answer before saying it out loud.

Ichigo can't help but roll his eyes at her.

But of course the goody-two-shoes of the class would give the most basic of definitions.

Because that is the only thing heroes are good for.

Saving the day, as if that was their purpose, their whole life, who they are.

Saviors.

(Ichigo hates this idea)

"Yes, in very broad terms, you're correct, Yamada-san." The professor says in such a dismissing way that stops Yamada from preening any further. "However, what is the essence of a hero? What makes him any different to other characters?" He asks again, prompting his students to elaborate more on their answers.

Another student raises his hand.

"That he's the protagonist of the tale."

"Right, Uehara-san. He or she is the protagonist in most stories. But that is just a characteristic within the story. What I am asking is what makes a hero, well, the hero? What is it that makes a person act heroic?"

Ichigo cannot help but snort.

In hindsight, maybe he shouldn't have, because that makes the teacher focus all his attention on him.

"Ah. Kurosaki-san, do you know the answer to the question?" The professor seems to ask almost mockingly.

Ichigo bits his lip.

Because, try as he might to hide it, he knows what is it the professor is asking, probably better than anyone in the room, even the professor himself.

"Selflessness." He replies at length. "A willingness to sacrifice everything just to protect someone else."

The professor excitedly moves his head up and down. "Yes! Thank you, Kurosaki-san. The reason heroes are saviors is because they are selfless!"

And he continues on with his lecture, talking about heroes, villains, monsters and damsels in distress, but Ichigo is no longer paying attention.

Ichigo hates heroes.

Well, not heroes per se, but the idea of them.

Selfless and protective and smart and charismatic and just plain good.

They don't seem human.

There are human qualities in them, of course, but there is also something entirely unrealistic about them.

Because nobody is perfectly good all the time.

Where are the bad qualities?

Where's the ugly in heroes?

He cannot find it.

Which is why Ichigo prefers the protagonists of tragedies.

None of Shakespeare's heroes are ever, well heroic. Not even in comedies.

There is always something beautifully damaged about all of them.

A tragic flaw, it is called.

That singular defect which unleashes the tragedy.

You might say that it is that which ends up biting them in the ass.

For Othello, it was his jealousy.

For Macbeth, his ambition.

For Hamlet, his inaction.

And for Ichigo, it is his own weakness.

Because that is what, in fact, almost destroyed not only his world, but the entire universe as every being knows it.

Nobody blames him, of course, because in his reality, he is the hero of the story. And he hates it. Every part of it. How he can become blameless of everything even when he had caused it or had failed to stop it.

And he doesn't think of himself as such.

A hero, that is.

Though everyone sees him this way, from his sisters in all of their innocence, to his friends, to the whole Soul Society.

Why do they keep praising him when they had almost died because of him?

Why do they hail him as a hero when the danger is not over, when, if he even dares to be happy, that demon of a man is going to come back to destroy them all?

Ichigo doesn't get it.

Heroes don't really exist in real life.

And the heroes in all stories have to be perfect, or else how are they even good?

It's a load of shit.

Ichigo is not a hero, as he protects people out of his own selfishness.

Because, deep down, he doesn't want to feel alone.

Because he wants all of his loved ones to be safe and happy.

And that's it.

That's the reason.

But others don't see it that way.

They see him exactly as all the heroes in tales.

All good and strong and able to overcome anything that gets in his way without giving up.

A prince charming.

A guardian angel.

But he's just...not any of those things.

And he's done trying to live up to their expectations.

It was easier when he was fifteen, to go along with whatever they wanted him to be.

So he acted happy when around his sisters and father, even though he was still carrying all the weight of the guilt of his mother's death.

It seemed easier, back then, to try to appear unaffected by that and all the little things, like the bullying he had suffered due to his hair color.

And at school, he had tried to be just another guy who just happened to have brightly colored hair.

His friends knew this Ichigo. And not to say he was a phony, but he wasn't all himself either.

He never showed them the scars scattered all around his soul for fear they would leave him behind.

Because who could ever love someone as hideous as he?

(Someone who had caused his own mother's death)

But t had gotten better for a while.

When he had become a Shinigami and had known the strength of carrying a zanpakutō and all that comes with that power.

However, he had just as quickly learned that such power came with the responsibility of not just protecting his loved ones, but anyone, really.

That he couldn't just stand still while others needed his help.

He needed to do better.

And so, he had tried really hard to become the kind of person that was deserving of that power.

Ichigo had become so good at it that others had bought it, especially after his first true test.

What had followed had been months and months of trying to prove he was as heroic as others saw him.

Because not only did the Soul Society see him as one, but also his closest friends, who, even though had seen him fall, still thought of him as a savior.

And that weighted on him even more.

He started wondering if, after so many battles fought together, they saw the true Ichigo or the mask he wore.

It was only after the last war, when he had so utterly failed and they had still given him praise, that he had found the answer.

Chad and Inoue and Renji and, hell, even Byakuya, lived in a fantasy where he was always strong and would power through everything. That he truly never failed.

Even Ishida was sometimes guilty of that.

(After Yhwach was defeated, saying he had won, as if it hadn't been Ishida who had done him in)

They all congratulated him, patted him on the back, and happily resumed their lives because Ichigo had won again. He had defeated yet another villain and thus they could live their lives in peace.

But all he had wanted to do was scream.

He had been defeated over and over by the Quincy King, and the only reason he wasn't a threat anymore was because Ishida had been there to deliver the final blow. And even then, absolutely no one was sure if he was gone for good.

And the reason why was because Ichigo had been weak.

If he had had true strength, he would have been able to win for sure.

And this doubt wouldn't be eating him away.

Now every night, before going to bed, even two years after the war had been won, Ichigo still repeats Yhwach's threat like a broken record.

During his happiest moment, the Quincy King will come back to kill him and destroy everything, according to his plan.

The thought terrifies him.

To think he had failed them all, because at any moment, Yhwach might come back, and it will be it for the universe.

He's no hero.

No savior.

Because even if the Soul Society hasn't said so, he knows they are all still in danger, and it all depends on his happiness.

And Ichigo is selfish.

He could have sacrificed that promise of happiness for everybody's sake. Yet he still holds onto it and is unwilling to let go.

He's not the person they all expected him to be.

And that weighs on him.

(If only he was as heroic as his mother─)

"Hey, Ichigo! Welcome back!"

It is Rukia who distracts him from his dark thoughts as he opens his bedroom door and finds her already there, having come over for the weekend as she has done for the past few months.

And for the first time in the day, he smiles.

"Hey." He greets her, letting his bag drop on the floor, and joining her on his bed.

"How was university today? What did you learn?" Rukia asks him excitedly, and he can't stop his lips from quirking up at how adorable she is, wanting to learn about college through him.

"Kinda boring." He shrugs, content to just observe her as she raises an eyebrow at him.

"Why? What did you study?"

"We talked about heroes." He answers her, moving up his head to appreciate the way her skin glows in this lighting.

"Heroes?" She scrunches her nose like a bunny.

"Yeah. Like in tales and stuff."

"Oh right."

Then they fall into a comfortable silence as they are wont to do. Ichigo takes his time to delight himself in the image she delivers. And as she is all light and white and pureness, he remembers a piece of memory he keeps close at heart ─the one and only time he has felt like a true hero.

There's fire and a will and a promise.

And in the midst of all, there's Rukia and her big doe eyes staring right at him as if he were a miracle.

"Yo!"

I remember now… the reason why I wanted to save you so much.

"Hey, Rukia." He suddenly calls out to her.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I'm a hero?"

She snorts and flicks his forehead. "Nope."

"Hey!" He rubs his assaulted head, but is more intrigued by her answer.

"I mean… we could say you are… but you're more… you know…" She gesticulates towards him.

"Uhu."

"You're Ichigo." Rukia says at last.

He thinks he understands it then.

Because if there is one person in this world that has seen him at his best and worst and has still got him, is Rukia.

She is the only one to have ever seen him whole.

And even when she knows about all his failings, she still has the capability to hold him in high esteem.

Because for her, Ichigo is who he is and so much more.

"Thanks, Rukia." He says with more emotion than he probably should have, but it is worth it when she beams at him.

"That's my line."

Ichigo still hates heroes.

Probably will always do.

But for Rukia, he thinks he might be able to become a little bit more heroic.

To be less selfish.

To be the man he is in her heart.

To be a little more like she is.

A/N: So when I said last chapter that Ichigo is still an English Major in this story, it was so I could use literature to add more symbolism to the story and stuff. And also because I do have a major in literature and I wanted to put it into good use lmao. As for the topic covered in this story, let me talk a little bit about it. The monomyth aka the hero's journey is this explanation of how tales generally work. Let's say, it is the main structure of folktales. Basically, in most tales there's generally a hero, and this hero, either man or woman, normally goes through a journey, either physical or spiritual. The journey has 12 steps in total, and it includes steps such as meeting a mentor, either a person or a text revealing the hero is destined for greatness, traveling, meeting people that help them in their journey, defeating the villain, earning praise, and marrying a prince or princess. There are many authors who have discussed the monomyth, but if you're curious you can check out Joseph Campbell's The Hero with a Thousand Faces.

Now I mentioned the monomyth because of course modern stories are still affected by it even if the hero is more of an antihero or an antagonist. For example, Star Wars is an example of a story that follows the monomyth. And this is also true for most Shounen stories. I wanted to mention it because, yes, Bleach does follow the monomyth, it just kinda falls flat in the last arc. And though Ichigo is not your traditional Shounen hero, he's still a hero. But I've always had the feeling that he never saw himself as such. He tried to help and save, but out of his own complex and yes, his own goodness, but he's not egocentric enough to see himself as that, and I also believe he'd hate to be called a hero, especially if he feels he has failed. And since Yhwach ended up being still pretty much a threat at the end, I feel Ichigo would think he failed them all and hate all praise.

The main plot of this one-shot started out when I thought about how most secondary characters think Ichigo is this Superman who can defeat anyone. Just thinking about Shinji calling out to him when Gin cut Hiyori in half and wondering where he is, because surely Ichigo was the only one that could defeat Aizen. Also Orihime getting kidnapped and even when Ichigo had a hole on his chest, she still wanted him to save her. It's how the Shinigami always expect Ichigo to show up and help them out. And, if you think about it, isn't that such a burden to bear? To be the one others called to be saved. And if you fail them once after they expect so much from you, wouldn't that hit you hard?

So I wanted that to be Ichigo's state of mind.

Rejecting this idea of being a hero because he doesn't feel like one, which also alludes to things he told Rukia at the beginning of Bleach, about how he couldn't save everyone.

And then, I also think Rukia does see him as he truly is, because in the times Ichigo has hesitated, she has admitted he has his flaws, but that he can overcome anything that gets thrown at him. She doesn't coddle him. She didn't deny he had an inner hollow. She told him to learn to control it and defeat him, as that is the person he is in her heart. And though I very briefly touched on this right now, Ichigo does think Rukia is more of a hero than he is, but that she also sees him as he is and sees his potential. So for her, he will try to become better, which doesn't mean for him that he will be a true hero, but just a better person in general.

In another one-shot, I will again touch up on this subject, and explore it further. But this was just the setting for that other story.

Again, I hope you liked it!