Guts woke up to Casca shifting in the bed as Phillip started fussing.
"Shh." She soothed, "Your father needs his sleep." Casca smiled then, turning her eyes to gaze sweetly on Guts.
Father. It was a title he'd never expected. Sure he'd technically been one for a while now, to a demonic miscarriage of a baby, but that was different to say the least.
"I love you," he murmured.
"Oh, you're up?" Casca asked, "You were always the light sleeper."
Guts smiled and looked upon his son who was squirming.
He propped himself up to be closer to eye level with Casca. Not knowing where to start, he asked, "Soo… Phillip?"
"You like it?"
"It's a good name." Guts assured. "It's not what I would've thought of, but it does fit him."
"What would you have named him?"
Guts thought a moment. "... Gaston."
"That would've been a good name too." Casca grew sad. "but if I were following that trail of thought, his name would've been Jeaudo."
"That would also be a good name."
"And it's why I couldn't choose any of those. I couldn't decide between all of the good men to honor with his name."
"I didn't even think of that," Guts said, adding, "This is why you're a commander."
"Schierke was the one to come up with it," Casca said, "Well I probably should feed him now."
"Oh, yeah, go ahead."
Without any ceremony she undid her top so the babe could suckle at her breast. Guts couldn't help but stare, an emotion eating at him that he couldn't identify. Desire? Probably, he usually felt that when he saw Casca's breasts, but there was something else too. A more wholesome feeling.
She of course noticed the look in his eye. He thought he would get some sort of scolding for staring so openly, but a similar look was in her eye.
"You missed me?" she asked.
"Everyday."
"I missed you." She adjusted Phillip at her chest. "You're going to have to change a lot of diapers to make up for the ones you missed."
That was the Casca he knew and loved.
"I'm not sure how I'll manage that with one arm," he said, and before she could respond added, "but I'm sure I'll figure it out."
God he loved his son.
The two thoughts seemed to be on repeat in his head, how much he loved Casca and how much he loved Phillip. Which was a lot. So much.
…
Farnese and Schierke were meditating that morning, along with the rest of the Kushan sorcerers. There weren't many sorcerers, not enough to be confident in their plans, but enough that their plans were possible.
The peace of meditation was broken by Isidro, Isma, Erica, and some of the other Kushan youths. To be fair they were preparing for the coming battle in their own way; practicing their combat skills. This was a training game where they all had sticks with dye, the person who came out of it with the least amount of dye on them was the winner. It was a favorite among the younger ones because it made such a mess.
It was becoming more of a bother, until Schierke finally snapped, "I know you lead them here just to bother us!" This was directed primarily at Isidro.
"Erica was the one to run this way," Isidro argued, "She had the least paint on her, blame her."
"I was just chasing Deepa!" Erica pointed at one of the older Kushan girls.
"And you'll still be chasing me," Deepa said and smiled cockily.
The taunt relaunched the group into the game, which culminated with Schierke being splattered. That was when they knew they messed up.
"Why you!" Schierke started, summoning golems and more dye to help her.
"Run for your lives!" Isma shouted dramatically. It dissolved into truly playing, the pretense of training finally gone.
The mage and sorcerers came to the conclusion that it was no longer a good place to meditate. Farnese stood up to go help Casca before she remembered Guts was back. She was sure while her help was probably still needed, their alone time as a family was needed more. A bittersweetness filled her.
Helping to take care of Phillip had filled a hole that Casca had created when she no longer relied on Farnese for everything. Farnese hadn't realized how much taking care of others had sustained her. Now even Phillip wouldn't need her as much; now that he had his dad back.
She was so lost in thought, she didn't see the paint flung her way. Farnese would've been colored bright orange had a gust of wind not averted the paint. Farnese looked up to see Serpico, surrounded by the sylphs.
She could see the sylphs near constantly now, as they clung to Serpico even when he took off his cloak. He didn't seem to realize and she hadn't told him.
"Thank you."
He smiled. "I figured you wouldn't want to spend all day washing your clothes now that Guts is back."
"You're right."
He always was right.
"They're sleeping in." Serpico observed.
Farnese nodded, "I can't blame them, Casca was wearing herself thin from worry."
The two watched the youths play for a few minutes before Serpico said, "Silat has decided on the invasion date."
Farnese wrinkled her nose. "Invasion? Is that what we're calling it?"
"Would you rather raid?"
That was what Guts had called it before he left. A raid on Falconia.
"It just seems a bigger scope than we can manage."
"Where's your optimism?" Serpico asked, and actually smiled.
Despite her attempt at a serious face, Farnese also cracked a smile, "This is ridiculous what we're doing. So, tell me when I'm going to help destroy the world tree?"
Serpico opened his mouth to answer.
…
"Are you sure I can hold him?" Guts asked, eyeing his son.
"I'm sure," Casca said holding out the baby.
"But I…" He motioned with his head to the missing limb. "I don't…"
"Look," she said, shifting Phillip to one arm, "I can do it, it's easy."
"That's not the same," Guts insisted, "You birthed him, I've never even…"
"What? You've never held a baby before?" She said it as a joke, but the look on Guts face told her she hit right on the mark.
"Not a human one, no."
"Well, then there's a first time for everything." She pushed the child into his arm. Guts protested until he was holding Phillip.
"Casca-" Guts started.
"Shh, just hold him while I get changed. He doesn't like to be put down."
It was then that Guts stopped worrying he was going to drop his son and became mesmerized. Phillip was so soft and squishy. It was hard to believe he had contributed to something, so pure.
Guts didn't notice Casca's return, or how time had passed until he heard a quiet sob. Guts looked up to see Casca, now changed and ready for the day, tears running down her face into her huge smile.
"Casca? What's wrong?" Guts asked worryingly.
She just shook her head and came to hug them both.
"I'm so happy you're back." was all she said and Guts thought he understood. Before he could say more, a knock was at the door.
"Silat has decided on the invasion time," came the voice, "The meeting will be held shortly."
Immediately Casca began to pull herself together which was something always eery for Guts to see. He could never drag himself out of such strong emotions so easily.
"Of course," Casca said through the door, voice measured and strong. To Guts she said, "We'd better get going. We've slept in enough."
Guts would've protested had he not seen Falconia and the threat it posed to the world. Still, he had just started to get to know his family, why was the world so cruel as to pull him away again?
Wait, did he just wonder if the world hated him?
Silly Guts, of course it did.
He was about to hand his son back to Casca, but she protested, "No, you should… It's good for him to be held by you."
Guts nodded. Holding his son made him nervous, but it also made him feel like he was making up for lost time somehow.
They left for the meeting.
…
Silat stood at the front of the room, pacing back and forth. Guts and Casca were among the last to arrive to the council that consisted of practically every person in the hideout. Even the non combatants were there, as most still had rolls as support.
"You all know why I've called you all here," Silat started, stopping his pacing to stand at the center, "The destruction of the World Tree and extermination of demons in the city known as Falconia. With the completion of the magic circles, it marks the beginning of our plan. I have decided the invasion will commence a week from now."
The room was so quiet a pin drop could have been heard.
Silat then looked around once before finishing the short speech with, "You all know what to do."
Everyone save Guts did, but he never really knew what he was doing. He'd have Casca fill him in later, not that sticking to plans was ever his strong suit.
The meeting was over just like that, and everyone went to prepare.
Guts' group had one more dinner together, acting desperately like everything was normal. Acting as if in a week's time there wasn't a good chance of them all being dead. For the first time since Guts came back he felt fear. Fear for his new family, and more than that, fear for the younger ones of his group. That Isidro, Isma, and Schierke would never have the chance to grow up. Fear that Farnese would die without reaching her full potential. Fear that Guts would do something stupid and ruin it all.
The only one he had less worry for was Serpico, because he knew what kind of man Serpico was. He was a warrior and he had to protect Farnese, something Guts could relate to. Still, Guts must've been getting soft, as he also hoped Serpico wouldn't have to leave his lady.
He wanted to tell them all this, tell them how proud he was, how far they all had come, but couldn't find the words. He could hardly ever find the words.
So when dinner was over and they were all about to go to bed, Guts stood up first, drawing all attention to himself.
"Thank you," was all he said, but the people around him knew him well enough to know what he meant. And that made him all the more scared.